A SEAL at Heart (21 page)

“Fourth, we will not dictate how the other person lives or makes their money. I’m a career SEAL. I’m putting in twenty and maybe even thirty years. Got it?” He laced his fingers through hers.

She pursed her lips, obviously considering her words before she spoke. Given their misunderstandings of late, he was glad she was taking the extra steps. “I may hate the idea of you being in danger, but I do know the score. I can handle the pressure and the lack of knowing what’s happening to you, if you keep talking about us—you and me—kissing me, and the rest of the good stuff.”

“Such as doing the funky monkey?” he said, wiggling his eyebrows up and down and giving her his best cheesy grin.

“Oh, that is the least romantic label I have ever heard for making love!” she exclaimed, pulling her hands away from him. “Get away from me.”

Jack refused to let go and instead pulled her onto his lap. “I’m Navy, ma’am. There are about a hundred ways I can describe sex, but none of them come close to describing what it is like to make love to you.”

Her face lit up as if he’d just given her the best gift ever. All he had been doing was speaking from the heart, too. His instincts usually led him onto the right path, and they kept shouting that Laurie was a very special someone. It had been worth raking himself over the coals to hold her again.

She laughed softly as she squeezed his hand tightly, and then she released it and stood up. “Jack.”

“Laurie.” He followed suit, his eyes taking in her beautiful body. She challenged him, and he liked her more for the experience of it.

They opened their arms and walked forward, meeting each other halfway. On equal ground, they embraced, and though there would undoubtedly be more to discuss, the life preserver had been grasped by both of them. Neither one of them was drowning anymore.

Needing to taste her, feel her closer to him, he brought his lips to hers and kissed her. It was like drinking ice-cold water from a bubbling, fresh spring on a hot day. Before he realized he was doing it, he’d walked her back to the table and was undressing her. When his pants hit the floor, he stopped and looked at her. “Shit. I’m sorry. Can… can we do this?”

“I’m able if you are.” She gave him a wink. “I went back on the pill, and everything will be back in sync soon enough. In the meantime, using a condom would definitely be wise. Double our protection until we’re, you know, ready.”

Slowly, he leaned forward, giving her every opportunity to pull away. Instead she leaned in, and their lips touched.

Her lips against his were downy soft. He kept his hands still, holding her balanced on his lap as her arms wound around his neck, drawing her body flat against his. Hard nipples teased through her clothing. The swell of her breasts made him long to touch them, cup them, and worship them with his particular brand of attention. The slow languorous kiss took over his senses. All he wanted at that moment was to strip Laurie naked and really get their forgiveness on track.

Pulling back from their embrace, she said, “We have more to talk about.” Those words had to be the fastest cause of death to a hard-on known to man.

“Could we do it in your bed, after…” He kissed her lips once, twice, three times, hoping she would let their lovemaking continue. Being skin on skin was an important connection.

“Yes,” she sighed. “I guess we’ve put each other through enough. Let’s go get ‘oinking from the boinking’!” With that, she pushed off of his lap and sprinted for her apartment.

“That’s ‘smoking from the stroking,’ baby!” he yelled as he ran after her in pursuit.

On her trail, he followed her through the bathroom and into her apartment. Two feet from her bed, he knew he had her. Making a flying leap, he grabbed her, wrapping his arms tight, and took her down to the bed with him.

As they fell, he’d spun her so she landed on top of him. She was laughing so hard that her body vibrated in his arms. “Those are some mean reflexes you have there, Red Jack. Can you show me the meaning of that Red nickname again?”

He liked the teasing and needed the laughter in his life. Ask any man what is important to him and after he mentions sex, being laid-back, easygoing, and having a sense of humor will be on top of the list. Laurie had all three and more. “Aha! I knew you liked my particular brand of adoration. But I’ll make sure it isn’t too hurried for you.”

“Oh, great!” Her laughter turned into breathy silence as his hand cupped her breast. Through her bra he could feel the heat of her body and the beat of her heart. It felt good to know he could make her pulse race that fast.

Gazing into her eyes, he knew he could spend a lifetime loving her.

He kissed her, and for the first time, he could have spent an hour just exploring her mouth and tasting her lips. Somehow this kiss had taken on a life of its own, and his hand slid from her breast up to cup her head and get lost in the silky strands of her hair.

When they came up for air, she blushed and looked down. “I have never been kissed like that before.”

“I’ve never kissed anyone like that before.”

She kissed him sweetly, shyly, and then slowly Laurie removed his clothes. When he was to her liking, and sheathed in a condom, it was his turn. He reached for her, removing her bra and panties and just as patiently adding tiny caresses with hands and his lips.

At last, together on the bed, their hands explored each other as if this were the first time. Their relationship had hit a new level of intimacy and a place he had never been before. Each touch brought heat racing through him and excitement speeding up his pulse. He had never felt this close to a woman before.

“I need you now.” When she pushed him down and crawled on top of him, he held his breath as Laurie firmly guided him inside of her. When his cock reached the top of its hilt, his breath eased out in one whoosh. She was already leaning down—to kiss him, to tease him, and to drive him wild with need.

“Laurie, you feel so good.” His hands clasped her hips, urging her to move.

She waved a finger at him, not in a mood to be ordered about. This was a woman who could deal with his shit, and he was figuring out how to handle hers. He’d always craved a woman this independent, hoped she existed, and in Laurie, he had found her.

Then, acting like the alpha male he was, he bucked his hips high, sending Laurie into the air and down on his cock. His body and mind focused every sense toward her.

“Jack!” She laughed breathlessly. “Do it again!” And he did.

They played and caressed until neither of them could stand the tension anymore. Then Laurie set a rhythm that he could feel deep in his gut, and he could have sworn that this little lady was leaving an imprint on his soul, too.

“Jack, you blow my mind,” she sighed as she pulsed up and down his cock, her back arched and her arms held high as if he were some kind of wild bucking bronco. She moved wantonly, inciting him until he began to drive his cock harder.

The climax built. His body tightened, preparing to cum, sending heat scoring through his veins. His fingers clasped tightly to her hips, guiding her to move faster and faster. The tension blazed out of him, his eyes, and the very pores of his skin as he tried to hold on longer. But she moved in circular hip sweeps that drove him to the edge of pleasure and pain as he tried to hold on.

His eyes stayed locked to hers. Feeling more exposed, yet connected, to this one special woman, he watched passion flow from her eyes into his. She threw back her head and then she screamed his name. “Jaaaackkkkk!”

Everything in his body was tightening. He couldn’t hold on any longer. He came hard and fast, with his seed pumping into the barrier he had put in place.

“Laurie. My Laurie.” She was the purest praise on his lips. The release was exquisite, because it was with her, his Laurie. And as he watched and felt her final climax shiver through her body, she lay down upon him and he wrapped his arms around her tightly.

He rocked her closer until the grooves of their body fit together as if they were pieces of a puzzle. The picture was whole now. She was by his side and here to stay.

Freeing one hand, he held the bottom of the condom and drew his cock out of her. He flipped the used rubber into the small vanity trash can by the side of the bed, and then he resettled her against him.

Their energies had combined. The closeness and the physical connection had cemented something important for him. As his pulse fell into sync with hers, as their heartbeats found a synchronistic rhythm, he knew he could get used to this, and he wanted to. The easiness, the rightness, and the perfection of the moment wove itself tightly around him as they fell asleep wrapped in each other’s arms.

***

He tossed and turned on the bed. His body was slicked in sweat.

“Roaker, come on, buddy. You have to get up.”

Jack’s eyes snapped open, but there was nothing but silence and darkness. A shadow moved near the patio, and Jack pushed back the covers and slipped out of bed. He left Laurie sleeping soundly as he made his way through the small apartment and onto the patio.

At the small stone wall stood Don. The moon showed his face clearly. Displeasure was written on it. “Time is ticking, Jack. You need to fix this or you’re going to get desked.”

“Don?” Jack couldn’t believe his eyes. He moved forward to embrace the man, but there was nothing… only air. Spinning around, he looked for him. “Don, where are you?”

“Where I’ve always been. Right beside you!” And he was. Just as suddenly as he was gone, he was there again. “I can’t stick around for much longer. You only have a short time to save your ass and learn the truth.”

“How do I do that?”

“Revisit the Op. There are answers in action.” Then, his swim buddy was gone.

Pain squeezed the back of Jack’s skull. He laid his fingers against the ache, but it spread throughout his brain, accompanied by a high-pitched sound. Crouching down, he gritted his teeth, determined to get through the pain. As his stomach churned, preparing to expel its contents, he laid his head against the cold stone of the wall.

Within seconds, the pain was gone.

He was sitting up in bed, and his body was shaking. Anxiously, he looked around the room. Nothing was there.
What
is
real? Did I see Don or was it a dream?

Looking beside him, he could see her. She was solid. He sought her, pulling Laurie’s lusciously soft sleeping form into his arms. Wrapping himself around her, he breathed in her scent and mulled over the facts, trying to decide what he should do next.

Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, the mind can achieve.

—Napoleon Hill

Her body was sore in all the right places. Waking up in Jack’s arms had been a very healing and intimate renewal. She was surprised at how different it had been, as if they were lovers and partners even. Spending time together, talking and making love, had cleared the rift between them and set them on a better path.

Forgiveness wasn’t an easy concept, but starting with her own mistakes had helped her forgive his. Now, peace surged through her.
What
am
I
going
to
do
with
this
happiness? I guess, revel in it!

Wow!
She had an odd wish to hum or sing. Would it be too much if she did? Sappy love songs ran through her head.

“Hey, are you with me?” Jack asked, taking a big sip of his coffee. Placing the mug on the table, he ducked his head and tickled his finger under her chin.

Embarrassment heated her cheeks as she waved her hand. “Sure. Please continue.”

Guess
humming
a
few
bars
will
have
to
wait.
She had to pull it together. Her man was working a plan! The two of them were sitting companionably at her table, talking like regular people in a relationship. Her fingers traced a scar on his thumb. With more chunks of the puzzle, it was easier to gain some ground on both the way his injuries had occurred and the current situation. Though there were still some unknowns to conquer, and he was eager to pursue them.

“As I was saying, I can’t go it alone, Laurie, I need you.” Jack eyes held steadily to hers. They drew her in until she felt she was gazing directly into the personification of courageous spirit. She could feel herself becoming excited about aiding him. She was completely head-over-heels, or rather heels-over-head, about him. “I need you to help me for this to work.”

His eyes bored into hers. This was the first time she’d sensed his desperation about this plea. “Will you do it?”

“Yes, Jack, of course. I told you I’d help you with anything you need.” She closed her eyes for a few minutes to give herself time to think. His plan had her as the control in a rather dicey situation. “But I’d like to go on record and say that this, uh, sounds sort of complicated and could be a little dangerous.”

“Headshrinking just isn’t my game. Let’s try this… and if it doesn’t pan out, then I’ll go through the Balboa system and do it their way.” The comment cost him. He was putting all of his hopes on his plan working.

“Okay.”

“Great. Let’s war-game the plan,” said Jack, point-blank. Neither of them had a problem speaking their mind or respectfully listening to the other’s thoughts and concerns.

With that in mind, she began at the top of her list of worries. “Okay. There are no safety elements. I don’t want to get hurt, and I don’t want to see you harmed either. You have proposed taking a boat to a secure government island where you can set off explosives and walk through the paces of your last mission.”

Her comment stopped him in his tracks. “Wait, I don’t want to hurt you, Laurie. How could you be harmed? I’m taking the risk, and you’re working the camera. There will be a satellite phone in your pack, and I will take all the chances.”

“You could bludgeon me. Shoot me. Blow me up. Have a psychotic break… just to name a few thoughts off the top of my head.”

“I wouldn’t do that.” His eyes searched hers with an element of frustration. “This is the best plan I’ve been able to find that makes sense to me. What other suggestions do you have?”

“I know you wouldn’t intentionally do it.” She took a deep breath and considered his questions. She’d been racking her brain for alternative options to this scheme that involved fire, ammo, and a trip to a secluded and patrolled island, and still she hadn’t found a different viable solution. “Other than doctors, none. I don’t have anything else.”

“Then, trust me. Guards patrol the island from 0700 to 1600, with two to three flyovers at night unless the weather is foul.”

Oh, how I hate those two little words, and yet… I do trust him. With all of my heart and soul, I believe in you, Jack. But a government island in the dark… Even the thought of it makes me nervous.

“Okay, you want me to trust you, let’s review your plan.”

His posture relaxed. He drained the cup of coffee and then grinned at her. “I’ll bet you never thought your boyfriend would be asking you to go on a super-secret Op with him.” Jack’s teasing was not helping.

He smiled and then leaned over and kissed the tip of her nose. His whiskers tickled and she resisted the urge to rub the itch away. Seeing him this relaxed and at ease was wonderful. Even his hair was growing longer. The buzz cut was gone, and he’d probably need a haircut before long. SEALs weren’t required to keep it short like the Marine Corps or Army. If she had to guess Jack’s preference, it was probably fairly neat and tidy. He didn’t seem the type for a mustache or hair that flopped in his eyes.

“Anything else bothering you?” He rubbed his brow. There were more wrinkles there now, deeper crevices—at least it seemed like it to her. The time apart had most assuredly aged him, and learning more about his situation with his SEAL Team and the amount of stress he was under, she wished he could take a break from it all. Perhaps when this was done and the answers were found, she could talk him into a mini vacation.

“Laurie, you look like you’re daydreaming.”

“No, just thinking about stuff.” It was sort of refreshing that he could identify what was happening in front of him. “How about we set up a code word so you know if this mission becomes too much for me and we can scrub it.”

He didn’t look convinced. “Such as?”

“Orange,” she said as she started peeling one. She’d just picked it from the tree outside and the smell was pungent.

He took it out of her hands and placed it on the table. “Look at me. Tell me now if you don’t want to do this. Either we are both in one hundred percent, or we are both out. No halfway marks. Because, as you know, half-assed shit will get someone hurt or killed. Got it?”

She nodded. Entwining her fingers into his, she asked, “How do you keep from being afraid?”

“Fear happens, but you can change fear into a productive emotion with a plan.

“Comfort zones are created by familiarity. So create parameters for yourself to be comfortable operating in, and when you go outside of them, have a set of reactions to fall back on.” He let go of her hands and reached for the pen and pad of paper near the phone. Placing them on the table, he opened the pad to a clean page.

“You know the Kenny Rogers song about ‘Know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em, know when to walk away, know when to run’? Well, here are some examples of how to operate. We continue on the path and do not deviate from the plan. If one of us is hurt—bleeding in a life-threatening manner—or a circumstance prevents us from continuing, such as a broken limb, discovery, or loss of personal safety, then we head for home or call for assistance.” Showing her the list, he waited for her reply.

“Okay, that’s the first plan. Thanks for agreeing to plan B.” Hell, she was a healthcare professional and she’d be an idiot not to encourage him to have something else in place.

He sighed. “I’m not fond of plan B.”

“Yeah, I know, but thanks for having it. In some small way, doesn’t it take the pressure off?”

“Nope, because sitting in a stuffy room is the worst, especially when I could be blowing shit up.” He smiled at her. “That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.”

Scratching his chin, he said, “There’s another option. I could do it alone or I could get one of my Teammates. Gerry just got home. He might be willing, in a couple of days, to help me out.”

She frowned. “I see the merits of having a Teammate help you, but you told me time was running out fast. Plus, you seem to remember more when we work together. You and me.”

“Yeah…” He looked away, staring out the door toward the ocean.

Standing up, she walked around the table and tugged his chair toward her to make room in his lap. Then she sat down and kissed him. “I’m a part of this journey. So, let’s do it. To think, when I first met you I thought we’d just be bed buddies and nothing more. No one can be prepared for everything, Jack. Just know I believe in you, and we’re burning daylight.”

“Thanks, Laurie. Means a lot to me.” He wrapped his arms tightly around her and squeezed. Then he ran his hand up her leg until he reached her thigh. “By the way, this is a night Op. We have a lot of light to burn.”

He stood up with her firmly in his arms. “Want to help me count your freckles?”

“Jack!” she squealed as he walked with her to the bed. “Again?”

“And again, and again…” Gently, he laid her down on the bed. His hands caressed her. “Thanks, Laurie.”

She nodded. Then slowly, she reached up a hand, cupped his head, and brought his lips to hers. “Love me, Jack. Love me like it’s our last day on earth.”

***

“Time is not my friend.” His words rattled around her brain like a bad song. Wearing a black sweatshirt, matte-black spandex leggings, and black ankle boots with a black silk scarf made her feel more like she was a heroine in some kind of low-budget spy movie than a girlfriend helping out her lover. “Why can’t I add a dash of color, again? Don’t answer that, it was a rhetorical question.” But the look on his face had been priceless as if she had asked why they couldn’t send out engraved invitations to everyone in the community about their supersecret event.

“Laurie…” That word said it all.

Even joking around hadn’t taken the seriousness out of it, yet she couldn’t stop trying. Humor was her mask; when she wore it, she was usually scared shitless!

Laughing, she replied, “Jack, I’m on board. One hundred percent. You know that. I trust you and the Op you have brewing in that SEAL brain of yours.”

An intense feeling flooded her body. The truth always did that, and she couldn’t remember ever trusting a man so fully, except perhaps Gich. “So, MacGyver, what do you have in mind?”

“Yeah, yeah, MacGyver. I like that. Just don’t call me that in bed. I prefer Red Jack.” He winked at her before he leaned over and kissed her. His lips were warm and soft, and she allowed herself to become lost in the kiss.

As they pulled apart, Jack took a deep breath, obviously regretful at ending the contact. Reaching behind her, he snagged a black band with a box-looking thing on it and fitted it around Laurie’s neck. Next he handed her a receiver. “Here, put this in your ear. This is a throat mike and receiver. It will allow us to communicate when we’re apart. Use it like this. Press here to send; release when you’re done, so you can receive.”

Jack reviewed the motions several times. She was grateful he was checking her out on the device so thoroughly. There was nothing worse than being in the field and not being able to handle equipment you were depending on. “You good?”

“Yes,” she replied before she carefully removed the receiver and mike and returned them to him for inclusion in their gear packs.

“Okay, babe, this is where I am putting the first-aid kit on your left hip. The satellite phone is located here—this flap will be easier for you to reach—so this is why it’s on your chest. An extra flashlight will be on your right hip. When you connect the straps across your waist, the access points will make sense. When I finish loading and strap you in, we’ll go through it again.”

“If I’m carrying all of this, what will be in your pack?”

He grabbed his pack and flipped open the top. Looking in, she was speechless. The man had brought cakes of explosive into her house. “Don’t look so shocked. There are no detonators.”

“Dude, I’m a woman. I can detonate my anger in about two seconds flat!” She teased.

***

Laurie clutched the edge of the black canvas, lighter-weight pack that Jack had assigned to her and tried to be excited about their upcoming trip. He had nixed the use of her favorite army-green backpack with its iron-on Brownie decal and sewn-on Girl Scout patches on the outside.
Killjoy.
She followed close behind as he hefted the abundant operating gear and headed for the water. As she walked onto the rocking dock toward the rubber inflatable boat (RIB for short, she knew), she couldn’t shake the nervous feeling. The night air nipped at her nose, making it drip. Without a tissue, she wiped her nose on her sleeve.

Jack steadied her.

“Slowly… and quietly,” he whispered as he helped her sit and become settled in the boat. Gripping the side of the control panel, she made herself as small and steady as possible and then felt Jack push the boat into the ocean with a lurch.

Her stomach moved with it and it surprised her how uncomfortable she felt. Maybe it was the fact that they were “sneaking” out to sea in a Navy boat.

Implementation
is
a
bitch!

Jack paddled adeptly away from the dock. It seemed prudent to ask if they’d get in trouble for borrowing the craft. She’d lived with SEALs most of her life, and they had several unspoken mottoes they adhered to. “Apologize later… if necessary” was a common one, but “Don’t get caught” was rule number one.

Her father had been big on “Don’t ask permission, just do it now.” Of course, his alcoholism had always taken it too far. There were too many times that he’d borrowed things from the neighbors and had never returned them or returned them broken or damaged, including one time, crashing the neighbor’s car. She’d had to call Gich on that one.

Jack was different. More responsible than her father, Jack didn’t love a vice more than the people in his life. She was certain of it.

Laurie bit her lip, unable to turn her brain off. At least he wasn’t a psychopath who had a complete mental break with reality. Crazy snippets of television shows shuffled through her brain, followed by questions she could never imagine relating to Jack. Wasn’t this a perfect way to get rid of a lover? Take them to sea and dump them into the middle of the ocean. Did Jaws really live out here? Sharks twenty feet long had been sighted off the San Diego coast. Could one of them topple the boat? What other sins could the darkness hide besides drowning, death, and dismemberment?