A Widow's Hope (26 page)

Not paying him any mind, Emma said, “Good morning. Shall I serve the oatmeal?”

“
Jah,
go ahead. We’ve all got a busy day ahead of us. We’ll be baking this morning and weeding the garden, besides our regular chores. Your
mamm
and
daed
have gone to see a doctor in Canton. You boys have your pap’s morning and afternoon chores besides your own. They might not get back till late.”

No arguments ensued—not even any grumbling. Only four expressions of concern gazed up at Hannah. “What’s wrong with our ma?” asked Henry.

“You know how her hands and knees have been troubling her, don’t you?”

Their heads nodded yes.

“Well, they’ve gone to see a specialist. Maybe he’ll give her stronger medicine than the aspirin she’s been taking so she’ll feel better.”

Any further details would be up to Julia, but her children seemed to accept the explanation without further questions. “And before your chores, Matthew, I need you to go to Miss Stoddard’s with a note.” Hannah pulled an envelope from her waistband and set it on the table.

The boy looked as though he’d been asked to dive headfirst into a snake pit. “Why? School just let out yesterday. I shouldn’t have to see her till September.”

Hannah bit back a smile and said sternly, “I hope Miss Stoddard never finds out about your unkind opinion of her, young man.”

Matthew’s cheeks colored to match the jam on his toast. “Ah, she’s okay, I s’pose, but this is my first day off from lessons.”

“It’s just a note. And you may ride the bicycle in the barn as long as you go there and straight back.”

His face brightened somewhat. “Do I have to wait around for an answer?”

Now Hannah did laugh. “Yes, and she might give you something to bring back too.”

Matthew finished his oatmeal, grabbed another slice of toast, picked up the envelope, and ran for the door. Apparently he was eager for his summer break to begin in earnest.

Emma finished her breakfast almost as quickly. “Will we be able to work at your loom today, Aunt Hannah?”

“No, not today. After baking we’re going to sweep the floors and dust and then we’ll head to the garden to weed. Later we’re going to start teaching Phoebe some English words.” An idea popped into Hannah’s head as she finished her oatmeal. “You can start now while I tend to my sheep. As you clear the table and wash dishes, pick up something and say the word first in
Deutsch
and then in English, like this.” Hannah reached for the milk and said “
milch
” and then “milk.” She did the same for the plate and cup while Phoebe watched her curiously.

Emma looked confused. “But Phoebe doesn’t talk. How will she learn English words if she doesn’t repeat them?”

Hannah wasn’t daunted. “She hears fine, doesn’t she? And just because she doesn’t talk today doesn’t mean she won’t start tomorrow.”

Emma shrugged her shoulders but glanced around the room for her first idea.

As Hannah headed outdoors into the bright sunshine, she overheard Emma pronouncing “butter” in both languages. Then Leah
enunciated the word “water” slowly and carefully and splashed dishwater on Emma to underscore her lesson. All three girls broke into a fit of giggles.

Easy as pie,
Hannah thought.
If I work hard and the girls help, we’ll have Phoebe talking in no time—in two languages, no less!

Julia never felt happier to see the kerosene lamp burning in the front window of home. The day had been long, painful, and discouraging. Simon had tried making polite conversation with Mr. and Mrs. Lee during the drive back, but finally he too lapsed into silence.

Their kind English neighbors, who’d waited for them long after finishing their own errands, understood. The diagnosis wasn’t good. The tests confirmed what Julia’s local doctor suspected—rheumatoid arthritis, a far more serious situation than painful, inflamed joints. Her immune system was attacking healthy tissue and causing permanent damage. If left unchecked, it would wreak havoc on her kidneys, lungs, and other internal organs.

The specialist couldn’t believe she had waited so long before seeking further medical tests. Only Julia understood why. Until today, prayers and a few aspirin a day had gotten her through. Now she faced the truth. If the medications and treatments weren’t successful, she would become a complete invalid—a load on her family.

After thanking the neighbors and bidding them good night, Julia leaned heavily on Simon as she entered her home. Her heart ached worse than her feet.

Hannah sat at the table, spinning her wool into yarn. “Finally home,” she said. “I was beginning to worry. Are you hungry? I’ve kept stew warm, and there’s fresh bread, baked by—”

“We’ve already eaten, in Canton,” Simon interrupted. “Just put it away.”

Julia felt her sister’s eyes studying her as she lowered herself into a chair. “
Danki,
we’ll eat it tomorrow for lunch.” She tried to smile.

“What did the doctor say?” Hannah asked softy. She sounded frightened and meek, like she had when they were children.

Julia waited until Simon went out to check his animals. He didn’t need to hear the story a second time. “Not good news,” Julia said plainly. “There’s permanent damage to my fingers, knees, and feet. I’ll need to have physical therapy and take strong anti-inflammatory drugs and low-dose cancer drugs to stop the joint destruction.”

Hannah’s eyes grew round as saucers. “Then will your pain lessen?”

“It might. If not, I’ll have to start injecting medicine right into the joints. And I’ll probably need surgery to remove damaged tissue from my knees and toes.”

“Oh, Julia. Why didn’t I see things were so bad for you?”

“Because it just got worse lately…and I didn’t want you to spend all your time caring for me. You have your own life to live. I don’t want to be a burden on my family.”

“Your family loves you. I love you. You can never be a burden.” Two large tears rolled down Hannah’s sun-burnished cheeks as she hurried over to embrace.

The hug from a sister offered more relief than the shots in her knees at the hospital. “And I love you,” Julia whispered into Hannah’s sweet-smelling hair. Hannah’s
kapp
slipped off during the hug, but Julia pulled it back in place with an extra tug on the strings. “Now tell me, how were the boys? Did they mind you without putting up a fuss?”

“Of course,” Hannah said. “You’ve got good
kinner.
Emma was a big help to me. Even Leah pitched in with Phoebe. We’re trying to start her talking again by teaching her English words for the common things she already knows. She paid very good attention to us. One of these days, she will forget her sorrow and let something slip out.” Hannah’s eyes sparkled with conviction.

Julia so hoped she was right. Having Phoebe whole again would be the answer to her
other
prayer concerning her brother-in-law.

It was dark when Seth turned into his brother’s drive. At least he’d put new batteries in his lanterns so cars could see him on the drive home. He was tired and dirty. The project at his friend’s house had taken longer than he’d figured because only Noah’s sons were available to help. But the foundation of the new
dawdi haus
was finished. Once the mortar had set, the little home would be ready for floor joists and walls. It hadn’t helped that he’d gone to bed so late the night before, but spending an enjoyable evening with Hannah had been worth the fatigue he felt now.

Hannah.
He wondered if he was falling in love with the woman. And he wondered too if that was such a smart thing to do. But tonight he was too tired to consider the wisdom of kissing her good night. He knew only that the kiss had been the best thing he’d tasted in a very long time. He would leave contemplation of the rest of his life for another time. Right now he wanted to pick up his daughter, see Hannah, if only for a few minutes, take a bath, and hit the hay.

The Millers’ lamp still burned in the window when he walked onto the porch. Someone was still awake. Hannah opened the door and greeted him with a smile that could have knocked him from his boots.

“Hi, Seth,” she said. “Come in. You must be hungry.”

Her skin looked fresh as buttercups, and he caught the scent of peaches from her shampoo. Suddenly he felt like an oaf. What woman wanted to be courted by a man who’d been sweating in the hot sun all day? His hair was plastered to his head, his trousers were dirty, and his shirt was ripped from catching it on a ladder hook. He should have at least jumped into Noah’s pond.

“Hullo, Hannah,” he said, hoping he was standing downwind.
“I’ll just get Phoebe and go on home. I’m not fit to come inside. Besides, it’s late. Thanks just the same.”

Hannah reached for a hamper on the counter. “That’s what I thought you would say when it started to get dark. I packed up your dinner to go home.
Unburned
fried chicken and parsley potatoes. There’s a jar of pickled green beans inside too. We’re out of beets.”

Her grin made the breath catch in his chest. “That sounds real nice.
Danki.
” He took the hamper from her grasp, brushing her fingertips lightly.

“Phoebe has already eaten and is asleep upstairs. Why not let her stay over? That way you won’t have to bring her by in the morning.”

Hannah looked so earnest Seth decided not to mention he’d been gone all day without seeing his little girl. Now must he go all tomorrow too? He nodded in agreement because Phoebe would only break into tears if he took her home and then left again in a few hours. “All right, but I’ll come by in the afternoon for her. She can work with me in the garden cutting lettuce and pulling up radishes.”

Hannah stepped onto the porch, letting the screen door close behind her. “Oh, Seth. I’m making real progress with Phoebe. With Emma’s and Leah’s help, I’ve been teaching her English words. Sort of making a game of it with these language flash cards that Laura Stoddard sent over. We hold up a picture and pronounce a word she knows slowly and carefully in both languages. She shapes her lips as though trying to say the word. I think it’s only a matter of time before she starts talking again.” Hannah rested one hand on her hip, looking quite pleased.

Seth feared she’d taken leave of her senses. “Were you out in the garden all day without your
kapp?
Why would Phoebe need to learn a bunch of English words when she doesn’t even speak our own language?” Because he was trying to keep his voice low so as not to wake the others, his words came out in a hiss. “I know you mean well, Hannah, but I’m sure you’ve got better things to do with your time.”

Hannah didn’t seem discouraged in the least. “Have you forgotten? Phoebe starts school in the fall. She’ll be with other children who’ll already know some English. We don’t want her to fall behind. And she needs to start talking again.”

“She will when she’s ready. Then Miss Stoddard can worry ’bout English and all the rest.”

“Are you saying you don’t want me to work with Phoebe?” Hannah looked bewildered.

“No…yes…I don’t know. Fall is a long time off. What’s the big hurry? Phoebe’s still a
boppli!
”

The last thing in the world he wanted to do was hurt Hannah’s feelings when they’d just gotten things back on track. And he wanted Phoebe to relax around her. But the
second
to the last thing he wanted to do was think about Phoebe going off to school.

Hannah mulled this over with a furrowed forehead and patted his arm. “I know what you mean. At least, I think I know. Let’s give this a few days. She seems to enjoy all the fuss from her cousins and me.” Hannah propped her other hand on her hip too.

“Okay, we’ll give your idea a try. I don’t see where it can hurt anything.
Gute nacht,
Hannah. I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon.”

Seth didn’t kiss her or attempt an embrace—not in his current physical state. And not in his emotional state either. Phoebe wasn’t ready to start school. And he wasn’t either.

She was all he had left of Constance and their old life. He might be ready to allow someone else into his heart, but he wasn’t about to let his little girl grow up and leave. Staying all day in a schoolroom could wait. Maybe he would hold her back a year. Learning English words could certainly wait. And Phoebe would talk again when she was good and ready.