I walked through my parents’ door with my arms filled with bottles of wine, smelling the scent of brisket in the air. All the usual suspects were there already including my parents, Seth and Emily, my Aunt Hannah and Uncle Morris, my Uncle Saul and Aunt Trisha, my cousins Jon and Meredith along with their kids Greg and Natalie, and my other cousins Nancy and Harold with their kids Ellie and Stacy. I heard adult voices coming from the family room and the children’s voices coming from the basement, chaotic and crazy as ever.
I placed the wine on the tables set up in the dining room, taking in the beauty and splendor of it all. I always got a chill whenever I reflected on how Jews all over the world celebrated the holiday and how it united us all.
“
Chag Sameach Pesach
,” said a voice from behind me.
My heart began to beat wildly and I turned to the source of the voice.
Goldman.
My brother must have invited him. God give me the strength not to make another drunken mistake tonight.
“
Chag Sameach
,” I repeated. “Why aren’t you with your family?”
“My brother and my dad flew to Florida to be with my dad’s side of the family and my mother went on a cruise.”
“Why didn’t you go, too?” I would go to Florida in a heartbeat if I had the opportunity.
“I can’t miss work.”
“Well, it’s your parents’ loss and our gain then.”
Wait, did I just flirt with Goldman? Oh dear Lord, I haven’t even had my first glass of wine yet.
He didn’t seem to notice, thank goodness. “Thanks. So, your brother felt badly for me and invited me to your little shindig.”
“Did he warn you?” I lowered my voice.
“Warn me? Warn me about what?” He stepped closer to me.
I started getting nervous about being close to him. When I caught myself biting my lower lip, I immediately stopped myself since he’d wonder why his proximity affected me so much. Honestly, I don’t know how I would answer that question when I didn’t know myself.
“Well, first of all, we do the entire
Seder
. That means a service before dinner and after dinner.”
I saw a brief glimpse of fear in his eyes before he resumed his cool façade. “I can handle that. We get to drink wine, right?”
“Oh yeah. I brought the good stuff.”
He smiled and I melted. “Then I think I’ll make it through. What else?”
“My aunts spend most of the night gossiping about people you’ll probably know from the community, like who just got a facelift and who’s about to file for bankruptcy. It gets worse as the night progresses and they drink more wine.”
“If we’re having a service, how do they have time to gossip?”
“That is an excellent question. They talk over it. Even when we ask them to stop or go to another room, they’ll keep interrupting. It’s actually pretty funny.” Maybe that’s why Passover is my favorite holiday.
“I have an idea. How about every time one of your aunts interrupts the service with gossip, we take a sip of wine?”
Goldman impressed me with his creativity.
“I thought you had to work tomorrow.”
“I do.”
“Well you’re going to have one hell of a hangover. Plus, I usually stay over since I drink so much.” I hope he didn’t take that the wrong way.
“I don’t have to be at work at any particular time. If I can’t drive, I’ll crash on your parents’ couch. It wouldn’t be the first time,” he reminded me.
“Okay then. Let’s get this party started,” I said, and went to say hello to the family with Goldman at my side.
I never knew just how much my aunts gossiped until that night. It didn’t take more than an hour into the service before I had a pleasant buzz going from the wine. At this rate, I’d pass out in my matzo ball soup. Then my aunts would really have something to gossip about.
On the other hand, Goldman appeared to be unaffected by the alcohol. He read his part of the service with precision and polish, while I couldn’t stop losing my place and forgetting how to read Hebrew.
Then I saw how he was doing it. He had added water to his wine, diluting the amount of alcohol he consumed. I gave him an evil glare and kicked him under the table. Everyone looked at me.
“Excuse me. I had an itch,” I lied.
Aunt Hannah took it as an opportunity to grill me. “So, how is the search going?”
I played dumb. “Search?”
“You know, the husband search.” Aunt Trisha winked.
“Not bad I guess,” I answered vaguely, hoping my mother would rescue me by reminding my aunts we were supposed to be in the middle of a
Seder
.
Not only did my mother not interrupt, she seemed as interested in my search as everyone else. Only Goldman appeared uncomfortable.
“I heard Jamie broke up with his fiancée. He was always such a nice boy,” my mother proclaimed.
I just grinned and nodded, not wanting to share I ran into him at the speed dating event. I assumed they’d get back to the service if I didn’t say anything. Evidently, I was wrong because the questions kept coming.
“Didn’t you go to that speed dating event last weekend?” Seth asked me.
Goldman must have told my brother. We’d need to discuss that later.
“What’s speed dating?” asked Aunt Hannah.
“Yes, Goldman, explain speed dating to my family for me,” I said with a smirk.
“I, uh, it’s a bunch of six minute dates,” he tried explain and for the first time was at a loss for words. Good, the jerk deserved it for ratting me out to my brother.
“Oh, like they did on
House
!” declared Uncle Morris.
I needed another glass of wine by then and I waited for the service to continue. When I realized everyone had forgotten about it, I downed my entire glass and refilled it.
“Did you meet anyone interesting?” asked my cousin Stacy.
“A couple of people, but I haven’t had a chance to go out with them yet. Goldman was there, too, right, Goldman? How many matches did you have?”
“Uh, a couple, but ...”
Ha! I got back at him. He squirmed in his seat.
My brother jumped in to rescue Goldman. “Why don’t we get back to the
Seder
? I’m starving!”
Figures, my brother will help out his friend, but leave me to the wolves. I’d have to think of a way to get back at him, but not tonight, because the wine made my thinking a little fuzzy.
“Yes, let’s get back to it.”
By the time we ended our
Seder
, the clock read 12:14 a.m. Everyone remained sober except Goldman and me, of course. Emily and I helped my mom clean up and did the dishes, while the rest of my family said their goodbyes. At one o’clock in the morning, Seth and Emily left and my parents went upstairs to go to bed. That left Goldman and I alone.
“Want to watch a little television?” he suggested.
“Sure. Why not?”
We caught the end of
When Harry Met Sally
.
“Do you think men and women can be platonic friends?” I wanted him to say no and kiss me. I wanted to believe maybe we both felt an attraction toward each other. That it wasn’t just me.
“No.”
He didn’t kiss me. “Look at us. We’re platonic friends. We’ve never had the idea of sex hanging over us.”
“We’re not exactly friends, Sara. You’re my best friend’s older sister. The situation doesn’t apply to us.”
“Thanks for throwing in the older part. You’re always so kind to remind me,” I said, then stuck out my tongue at him.
“Do you believe men and women can be just friends?”
“Honestly, I think I could fuck a guy and still remain just friends. It doesn’t mean anything anyway.”
“You don’t really believe that, do you?” He sounded pissed off at me, but I didn’t know what I had said to anger him.
“I think sex and love are two different things. I could have sex with someone I didn’t love, and I can love someone I won’t have sex with.”
“Like Missy?”
“What about Missy?”
“You love Missy, but you don’t have sex.”
“Of course not,” I stated a little too loudly.
“Have you ever thought about it?”
“No!” Where was he going with this?
“Do you think she’s ever thought about it?”
“No way. We’re just friends. That’s all we’ve ever been and Missy knows that.”
“Yes, but knowing and feeling don’t always sync. It’s possible Missy is in love with you and you’re oblivious. If that’s the case, it’s going to come out one day and change your friendship.”
“Missy is not in love with me. You don’t know what you’re talking about!”
“I hope I’m wrong about it, Sara.”
I sat there thinking. If Missy were in love with me, she would have told me, right? Goldman just wanted to unnerve me, and I would not give him the satisfaction. In fact, I think I’d get my revenge right now.
I turned off the television, stood up from the couch and stretched while yawning. “It’s really late. I’m going to bed. Are you coming?”
Panic crossed his face. “What?”
“Well, you don’t believe we’re friends. If we’re not friends, we can sleep platonically in the same bed, right? We’re not friends and we don’t have the whole sex thing hanging over us, because there’s no danger of us being attracted to one another. According to your exception, we can sleep together tonight.”
He didn’t know what to say to that. If he said he couldn’t sleep in the same bed as me, he’d be admitting we’re friends, and then he’d have to concede there is a possibility of us having sex or he could admit friends could stay platonic. Either way, he had to sleep in the bed with me in order to save face. I love winning an argument, especially against an attorney like Goldman.
“Okay. Lead the way.”
I led him to my old bedroom, which hadn’t changed much since I’d moved out twelve years earlier. I ran to the bathroom to get into my nightgown and when I came back, Goldman was already under the covers. I noticed his pants and shirt on the floor. Unless he went commando, he only wore his underwear to bed.
I slid in next to him, and he turned to face me.
“You do not play fair, Sara,” he whispered.
“No, I don’t. Now you won’t forget it.”
“No, I won’t forget. Goodnight, Sara.” He turned away from me. After a few minutes, I fell asleep, comforted by the warmth of his body.
I woke in the morning to find Goldman gone and his side of the bed already cool and neat as if he had never slept beside me. I wish I didn’t, but I felt his loss.