Accidentally Hers (Sterling Canyon #1) (18 page)

“Didn’t you keep any of your inheritance for personal use?” Trip tossed the apple core in the trash and leaned forward.

“Not much. I needed to apply most of it toward the purchase price of
Backtrax
in order to qualify for the small-business loan. I only kept about fifteen grand in my personal account.” Grey scrubbed his hands over his face. “I’ve dipped into it a bit, but am trying to save it in case I need it to cover a loan payment or two if the business account runs dry before I recover any money from Andy Randall. Problem is, that could happen before next winter unless we drum up a lot more business in a short time frame.”

Grey scratched the back of his neck and blew out a long breath. Had he not been sidelined in February, he’d have some extra funds to buy a couple of snowmobiles and maybe upgrade the snowcat, too. Now those things would have to wait. “If only this accident happened two years from now, after I’d reserved more capital, it might’ve been less problematic.”

Trip cleared his throat. “Listen, if you really get into a squeeze, I might be able to come up with some extra cash.”

“Oh, really?” Grey grinned. “You got some sugar m
ama I don
’t know about?”

“Something like that.” Trip’s typical teasing tone was noticeably absent.

“Cryptic.” When Trip didn’t respond to Grey’s prompt, he dropped the subject. “Well, thanks for the offer. But setting aside your sugar mama, I think if I can clear about one hundred grand, I can make it all work.”

“That’s not right, Grey.” Trip pointed at the wage-and-tip column. “Avery advised you to sit out a full year, which means you can’t count on skiing this coming season, at least not until late spring.”

“I’ve got to be back on the mountain come Thanksgiving or the expenses jump.” Damn it, he couldn’t entertain another ski season without more income and tips. Granted, guides barely broke the poverty level in terms of wages, but something was better than nothing. “If I want to stick to my plan of taking as little from the business as possible for the first three years, I can’t afford to pay another guide
and
take an income for myself.”

“The worst thing you could do is be shortsighted and end up blowing your knee out again.”

“I’m the face of Backtrax. I’ve got to get back out there to buddy up with the customers. I can’t just throw in subs and hope to build repeat business from behind a damned computer.” Grey kicked the desk.

Trip stood and paced, his forehead creased with concern. “Listen, I know you don’t want to hear this, but you’ve got to consider what happens if your knee never fully recovers. What if this injury takes you off the big mountain slopes permanently? Don’t you want to be compensated for that possibility, too? It’s not just about the nuts and bolts of your actual losses. We’re talking about your entire future. Don’t be so quick to lowball the money you need to cover yourself.”

Holy shit!
Never cutting freshies in backcountry chutes would be like losing an arm. Grey didn’t even want to entertain that thought.

“The most I can get from the OS is one hundred and fifty grand, which—best case—translates to one hundred grand in my pocket. Andy Randall’s got nothing but the twenty-five grand insurance policy.” Grey inhaled slowly, trying to stave off the headache at the base of his skull.

“I thought your lawyer said Randall’s house would sell for more than half a million bucks.”

“Yeah, but I’d be screwing over Avery. She doesn’t deserve to be stuck in the middle of this nightmare.” Grey looked at the ceiling. “It’d screw her parents, too. Apparently they didn’
t just
give
their kids the house. They just never formalized the loan with documents. If I get a judgment lien, they’ll be screwed, too.”

Trip whistled. “Just ’cause it sucks for them doesn’t mean it’s your fault.”

“Doesn’t matter if it’s not my fault.” Grey unwrapped a grape sucker. “If I hurt her family, it’d pretty much kill any relationship we could have.”

“I know you like her. Hell, you may even be halfway in love with her despite never having been on a single date.” Trip drummed his fingers on the desk, shaking his head in apparent dismay. “Bottom line, you’ve made no promises and have no commitment to or
from
her. You’ve got to look out for yourself. Don’t ignore the worst-case scenario or you could end up with nothing—no business, no money, and no Avery.”

“Did someone mention my name?” Avery popped her head in the doorway, surprising both Grey and Trip.

Trip bowed and tipped his hat. “Look how pretty you are—like a daffodil and ball of sunshine mixed together.”

Grey rolled his eyes at Trip. He grinned as he rose from his chair, scanning Avery’s yellow-and-white ensemble. Yellow must be her favorite color, because she wore it often.

“Thanks, Trip.” She glanced at the papers spread out on the desk. “Am I interrupting something important?”

“No, ma’am.” Trip stepped toward the door. “I was just getting ready to head out.”

“Should I warn all the single women in town?” She playfully punched his bicep as he passed by.

Trip folded his hands in prayer. “Please don’t.” Then his expression transformed to something more sober. “But do remind Grey of the importance of not pushing that knee too early.”

She nodded as he exited the office. Grey liked her smile. Liked the waves of energy she threw off when she talked. Liked the way her eyes reflected her intelligence. Damn, she was pretty perfect.

He waited, frozen in place by a mix of wonder and surprise at her visit, rolling the remains of his Tootsie Pop around his tongue. “What’s up?”

“Is this a bad time? Kinda sounded like I interrupted something serious.”

Grey waved his hand and threw the bare lollipop stick aside. “It’s fine. We were just having a difference of opinion on things related to the business.”

“Oh, sorry.” Avery grimaced. “Trip’s right about your knee, though. The more time you take to build strength without pushing it, the better.”

“Appreciate your advice, but ultimately it’s not your decision.” Grey stood and stepped closer, somehow refraining from grabbing her waist and pinning her against a wall or chair or other object in the office. Her cute smile made him stupid, and made the crotch of his jeans feel a little snug. “I’m happy to see you, though. Did you come by for any particular reason?”

“Well, I brought you a present for rescuing me last night.” Avery reached into her purse and pulled out a bag of lollipops.

Grey chuckled. “Thanks. I can never keep too many of these around.” He set the bag on the corner of the desk. “Anything else?”

Her cheeks turned a darker shade of pink as she tugged at her earlobe. “I wanted to let you know I spoke with Kelsey.”

Hmm. She came by instead of calling. A good sign. He stepped a little closer and reached out for her hand, twining his fingers in hers. “And?”

Her gaze drifted from their clasped hands to his face. “And if the offer still stands, I’m up for that date.”

“That’s good news.” Grey felt his smile nearly splitting his face.

“You look like you just won the lottery.”

“I feel like I did. I’ll take you and a bag of lollipops over cold, hard cash any day of the week.” He raised her hand to his lips and then wrapped his other arm around her waist.

“You’re still optimistic about the outcome of these lawsuits, right?” Her hopeful expression gutted him, but he didn’t want to risk her pulling away because of her family. Trip might’ve tossed Grey’s rose-colored glasses in the trash, but his heart was caught in a vise of anticipation, so he shoved his friend’s warnings aside.

“I’m optimistic about a lot of things,” he deflected, then leaned in and kissed her. He felt her smile against his mouth, so he pulled back. “What’s so funny?”

She licked her lips. “I’m wondering if you’ll always taste like grape candy?”

“Count on it.” He lowered his head and planted another kiss on her lips. “Just think of me as a different kind of sugar daddy.”

“Funny you should use those words. Apparently that’s exactly what Kelsey is looking for now.”

“Really?” Grey rocked back on his heels. “Actually, I can see that working out well for her.”

Avery’s mouth and nose twisted up for a second. “I’ll choose to interpret that in a positive light.”

“Interpret it any which way you like. All I care about is this, here. So don’t make any plans for Saturday.” He grasped her waist with both hands again.

“The whole day?” Her expression grew curious as she tentatively rested her hands on his shoulders.

“And night, if you’ll hold that open for me too.” He squeezed her waist.

“What did you have in mind?”

“At night?” He grinned when she slapped his shoulder.

“You’ve clearly forgotten my one-month rule.”

“Hey, can’t blame me for trying.” He had blocked it out, dammit. Another month would feel like an eternity. “I want to check out a potential bouldering site. Thought maybe we could go hike in the afternoon, then I’ll take you out for a proper dinner.”

“Now I understand Trip’s remarks.” Avery’s forehead creased a bit. “Your knee isn’t ready for heavy-duty hiking, Grey.”

“This wouldn’t be
real
hiking. We’ll take the van as far as we can, and then go slowly. I’m told the trail to this particular spot is fairly flat and clean, so the worst that will happen is I’ll get a little sore. No risk of turning an ankle or twisting the knee.”

“Promise we’ll turn back if the terrain is too risky for this stage of your recovery.”

Frickin’ stages of recovery. Being held back angered him, but not nearly as much as being deemed fragile or feeble did. “I’ve been working hard to rebuild my strength.”

“I know. Still, there are limitations in the healing process. You’re not superhuman.”

“That’s where you’re wrong.” He yanked her up against him. “And I can prove it.”

This kiss was more demanding—almost savage. He wouldn’t allow her to see him as some kind of pathetic project. Some weakling who needed to be coddled and protected. He was a man, dammit. A strong man who knew what he wanted and how to get it. Who knew what she needed and how to give it.

He felt the instant she submitted. Her body softened, and her hands found their way into his hair, which sent tingles fanning out over his scalp. He moved his mouth along her jaw to the sensitive spot behind her ear and then down along her neck. She arched into him.

He kissed her again, walking her backward until her back hit the wall. She gasped, but he didn’t stop. He grasped her wrists and pinned them over her head, pressing his body against hers until they both shuddered.

With the aching need in his body, waiting another month to have her fit the definition of cruel and unusual punishment. He released her wrists so he could fondle her body, her breasts. But he’d barely got the feel of her in his hand when she pushed him away.

“Whoa, slow down.” She swallowed hard before meeting his eyes. “I want to see where this leads, but I move slowly. It’s a self-preservation thing, you see.”

He wasn’t sure if she was afraid he’d break her heart because he’d prove to be the player she feared, or because he’d end up forcing her out of her home. Either way, he understood her hesitation. Couldn’t even blame her, really. He’d be wise to follow her lead in that regard or they could both end up in a lot of pain.

“Okay, Bambi. I’m in no rush.”
Liar!
His raging hard-on protested. “So how about Saturday. Is it a date?”

“It’s a date as long as you promise to be honest about how your knee is feeling.” And there it was again—her concerned scowl.

Between her worry and Trip’s warnings, Grey’s good mood began to tank again. Maybe he did need to brace himself for the possibility of being permanently sidelined by this damned accident.

“I have a question for you, and I want an honest answer.” He stepped back and crossed his arms. “Will I be able to ski again by winter? And I’m not talking about slopes at the resort. I mean
my
kind of skiing.”

Bambi blinked at him and chewed on the inside of her cheek. “Don’t you think I would make promises if I could, not only for your sake, but so you could also settle things with Andy? No one can know if you’ll be able to put the extreme stress on your knee required for leading hardcore ski tours, let alone know when. But I remain hopeful it can happen.”

No promises. No certainty. She’d hedged with him as he’d hedged with her about the lawsuits. Turnabout was fair play, he supposed.

Hopefully their insidious optimism wouldn’t act like water, slowly undermining the foundation of their relationship.

Chapter Fifteen

By noon on Saturday, Grey and Avery had hiked to a clearing alongside a narrow trail following the river, about one hundred yards from an outcropping of twelve- to twenty-foot-high boulders. Ideal for climbing without ropes and harnesses, and for perfecting specific moves at a safe distance from the ground.

Shaman scampered around the area, barking and sniffing under the brush. Although the sky was virtually cloudless, the shaded area felt cooler than the sixty-four degrees predicted. Grey noticed Avery rub her hands over her biceps for warmth.

He dropped his pack on the ground, unzipped it, and removed a lightweight jacket. “
Here.
” Smiling, he draped the fleece over her shoulders. “I know it isn’t pink or lime-green or yellow, but it’ll keep you warm.”

“Thanks.” She slipped her arms into its sleeves. He grinned when she then unwittingly held them up to her nose and inhaled.
She likes me.
“I’m surprised you didn’t make fun of the color of my Merrells, too.”

“A lot of purple.” He handed her a fresh bottle of water.

“Grape!
Your favorite flavor.
” She stuck one foot out, wiggling it around.

“Careful, Bambi, or I might come over and suck on your toes,” he teased, stepping closer.

She shook her head. “I’m ticklish.”

“Good to know.” He bent over, reaching back in the pack to retrieve a blanket and several small Tupperware containers.

Avery sat cross-legged on the blanket and glanced at the boulders. “So this is where you’ll teach bouldering?”

“Seems so.” Grey quickly surveyed the area. “It’s easy to access. Should be a good training spot, and then when things progress, we could begin heading up that way,” he motioned farther down the canyon, “to access some switchbacks and reach better terrain—good walls with views.”

“Who will sub for you this summer?”

“I can handle bouldering, for God’s sake.” Grey sensed an oncoming lecture, so he cut her off. Plus, he’d hoped to avoid discussing the obstacles between them, like his recovery. “
I don
’t need you and Trip to babysit me and my knee. I’ve got to be involved with the clients. I can’t build relationships sitting in my office.”

“I’m just looking out for your long-term recuperation. That’s all.”

He drew a deep breath, looking at her with a sheepish grin.

“Sorry for snapping at you.” He popped the lid off a container of fresh berries and set it between them. “I hate being seen as an invalid. I’m already at a disadvantage here, with your being a PhD and my being an undereducated, dyslexic ski bum.”

Avery straightened up, tilting her head slightly. “Do you actually think I look at you that way?”

He shrugged while opening another container filled with a brown rice-cranberry-pine nut-chicken salad, then passing her the last two containers: one with olives, feta, tomatoes, and cucumbers, the other with hummus and pita chips. “I know a girl like you has a lot of options.”

“A girl like me?” Avery began to load up her plate.

“A girl like you.” He stretched himself out on his side, propping his torso up on one arm. “Pretty, smart, ambitious, confident, with a hint of smart-aleck.”

Avery glanced away, appearing embarrassed by his compliments. When she finally looked at him, a shy grin appeared.

“First of all, thank you for this excellent spread. Not at all what I’d expected given your lollipop fetish.” Avery bit into a big strawberry and held up her index finger. “Secondly, thanks for the high praise, but obviously my exes didn’t quite see me as a great catch, so consider yourself warned.”

“Their stupidity is my gain.” He stuffed an olive into his mouth. When he licked the oily dressing off his lips, he saw Avery’s gaze linger on his mouth.
Easy, Grey.

“
I
see you as an entrepreneur, not a ski bum.” She hugged her knees to her chest. “I envy you, actually. I’ve been saving up for four years to start my own clinic, so one day I can be my own boss, too.”

Determined to keep this date light, Grey ignored the reminder of their uncertain financial futures, and teased her. “
Like Donner?
”

“Only better.” When she winked, Grey chuckled.

“Naturally.” Setting his empty plate aside, he nudged closer to her and brushed his fingers along her thigh. “Did you like growing up here?” He waved his arm over the surroundings.

“I did.” She glanced around at the new grass, budding trees, and river. “I love it here. In fact, my reluctance to leave is part of what came between Matt and me.”

“Huh. Again, his stupidity is my gain.” Grey didn’t really want to hear about her relationship with Matt. “So you want to stay in your hometown. Do you like living with your brother?”

As soon as the words were out, he regretted bringing up Andy and their home.
Idiot!

She glanced away, obviously uncomfortable talking about Andy or their home with him. “We get along really well, actually.” She ran her hands up and down her calves. “Although, if I’m being honest, that’s probably because he’s usually happy to go along with whatever I want. He’s more quiet and sensitive than me. In that way, he’s a lot like my mom.”

Grateful for a chance to move away from that hot topic, he picked up on her last comment.

“So are you like your dad?” He watched her expression swiftly turn to a deep frown.

“Not willingly.” Her lip curled.

“Oh, really.” He popped up higher on his arm, eager to dig into the crack he’d just found. “Now
that
sounds interesting.”

“It’
s so
not
interesting.” When Grey shot her a look, she continued. “Let’s just say my dad isn’t the world’s warmest, most patient man.”

“So you weren’t the apple of his eye?” Slowly the puzzle pieces began fitting together—her wariness with men, her need for control. A beat of silence passed, except for the puffing of Shaman’s breath as he chewed on the dog treats.

“
My dad
’s always been proud of me. He loves me.” Avery watched Shaman trot over to the boulders. “He’
s just
. . .
demanding.
”

“What about your mom?”

“She’s been a doting mother and wife.” Avery’s tone indicated her remark had not been much of a compliment.

“Isn’t a doting mom a good thing?”

“When you’re a kid, sure. But sometimes, as much as I love and appreciate her, I feel like I don’t really know her—the real her. Honestly, I wonder if she even knows herself. She’s made my dad, Andy, and me the focal point of her life. Her friends were the mothers of Andy’s and my friends, her outside activities involved school volunteering or the bridge club my dad wanted to join. From my perspective, she gave up her own identity for most of her adult life.

“Now she’s in her late fifties without anything of her own. She’s totally under my dad’s thumb. I hate that, and then I feel guilty about my anger, because she’s been so loving.” Avery picked at some grass, her gaze hardening. “
I doubt
I could ever be like her—sacrificing everything that makes me who I am just to please everyone else. If that’s what it takes to be loved or make love last, then I guess I’ll be on my own.” She looked at Grey, her expression solemn. “See why my former boyfriends weren’t so stupid after all?”

“All relationships are different; some better than others. It’s up to the people involved to figure out what works for them.” He narrowed his gaze. “But just because
you
wouldn’t make your mom’s choices doesn’t mean she’s unhappy with them.”

“I hope she’s content. She doesn’t have many options at this point.” Avery twisted her mouth in a grim mood. “Enough about my family. Tell me about yours.”

The thought of his mom always made him smile. “My mom is exactly how you’d picture a music teacher. Loves kids. Loves music. Creative and caring. Laughs easily—and bakes some wicked-good cakes and cookies. You can pretty much blame her for my sugar addiction.” He paused and rolled onto his back, looking at the sky but seeing his childhood living room in his mind. “My dad is affectionate with her. They have a strong marriage. But he was tough on me. He had a hard time with my dyslexia, mostly because he worried about my future. Then, after Juliette died and I took off, well, he felt like I abandoned them.”

Grey looked over at Avery before continuing.

“He’s never really forgiven me for leaving. He couldn’t understand why I didn’t want to stay there surrounded by memories because, as he put it, a lot of them were good ones.” Grey’s chest constricted slightly, but he rubbed it away. “Then, when his dad died and left me his money, my using it to buy a business here instead of around Lake Tahoe was another nail in my coffin. Now he’s convinced I’ll lose everything. To him, my dyslexia means I can’t run a business. But I’ve learned a ton about the industry from working with so many outfits at so many resorts. And Trip is a huge help with the paperwork.”

He aimed for confidence, but really, Grey had no fallback position. Worst-case scenario—his lack of education, dyslexia, and inability to ski or climb would relegate him to a dreary future working minimum-wage jobs.

Grey’d bet his entire inheritance on making Backtrax work. He rubbed the space above his injured knee. “I know I can do this. I have to make it work, if for no other reason than to avoid the ‘I told you so’s.’”

Avery shivered as a strong breeze rustled the leaves of the nearby branches. Grey tugged her down alongside his body and wrapped one arm around her shoulders. Holding her close distracted him from his worries.

She set her chin on his chest. “You’re disciplined, Grey. I have faith in you.”

He smiled while playfully touching the tip of her nose. “Hopefully that faith extends to more than Backtrax. I want you to have faith in me as a man you can trust. One who isn’t interested in changing you or holding you back.”

He watched her face twitch. Personal discussions clearly made her jumpy. But she’d only promised him one date, so he had to make it count.

She stared at her fingers as they traced a circle on his chest. “Can I ask you a question about Juliette?”

His stomach tightened. “Sure.”

“What was it about her, exactly, that made you fall so hard?” She glanced at him, then looked away as if she were afraid of the answer.

For someone who didn’t like answering personal questions, Bambi sure could ask the big ones. But feeling the weight of her against his side, and suspecting she felt insecure, made it less painful for Grey to talk about Juliette today.

“It wasn’t any one thing.” He felt himself smile. “More like a million little things and experiences. And youth. Sometimes I’ve wondered, if she and I had met as adults, would we have been as good together? I can’t really answer that question, but I think what made it work for us was mutual respect. I listened to her, and not just to what she said, but how she felt and what she hoped. I supported her dreams, and she did the same for me. We had absolute trust in each other. No secrets. She had my back and I had hers. She truly was my best friend.”

“Sounds nice.”

“It was.” He tilted his head, and decided to unearth more about Avery. “You said something the other day that troubled me.”

“I did?”

“Yeah. You said you’d never felt really loved by any guy.”

Her cheeks turned pink, and not from the breeze. “Do you think I’m pathetic?”

“
No. I just can
’t believe it.”

“Look at how Matt betrayed me. Though honestly, even though I never hurt him, I didn’t love him deeply. Not the way you loved Juliette, with your whole heart and soul. That’s a connection I’ve never experienced. Maybe it’s just not in the cards for me. I don’t have the best attitude about love.”

Her downcast expression made him want to punch Matt and every other guy who’d disappointed her. “Or maybe you just hadn’t met the right guy until now.”

Her lips quirked.
“Until now?”

“Right now.” Then he rolled her onto her back, holding himself above her. “I wouldn’t want you to change a thing.” Before she could respond, he bent his head and kissed her, gently lowering his body against hers. What he would give to make love to her, here and now.

Her hands found their way around his waist and back, and she kissed him back. Tightening and tingles shot through his body and straight to his groin. She felt so good, so right, so everything. He wanted to be the guy who would change her outlook on love. He
would
be that guy, even if he needed a sledgehammer to break through all her walls.

“Grey,” she panted as his mouth found her collarbone and she tightened her hold on him.

Unfortunately, a loud bark and wet nose descended upon them, killing the moment. Grey pushed himself up on his elbows and grumbled, “I should’ve left Shaman at home.”

“He’s my body
guard.
” Avery reached up to pet the dog under his chin. “Keeps you in line.”

Grey kissed the tip of her nose. “Not for long. He’ll be grounded this evening.”

Two hours later, Avery returned home to shower and change for dinner. She was humming to herself when she entered her house.