After The One (The One Series Duet) (27 page)

Most people love to tell the whole truth when they’re drunk…but I never worried that Julian wasn’t telling me the whole truth before today. I don’t want to think he changed our honeymoon plans to cover up or distract me from the fact that he was cheating with Lillian. Oh God! He can’t be. He can’t. I need to figure out how to ease into this conversation so it doesn’t come off as accusatory and just see what he says from there. I can do this.

Before I could open my mouth, Julian looked at me thoughtfully. “Are you worried about if I heard what you said? Because I did and I don’t like it, but I’m not mad.”

My eyebrows came together in confusion. “What?”

“About being attracted to Tate. I don’t like that asshole, but I’m not mad that you—”

“No,” I cut him off mid-sentence. I sat up as much as I could with his arms locking me in place. “I’m not attracted to Tate. I said he was attractive, but I’m not at all attracted to him. You have nothing to worry about.”

“I’m not jealous,” Julian clarified as he tried to adjust me in his lap. “I’m sorry I was acting like that earlier. I’d had too much to drink and I was already in bad mood. I know what we have. I just saw the way you were looking at him when I came out of the party and I went off.”

“I was shocked to see him. You didn’t see me looking at him in any other way but shock, because that’s all there was to it. Would I be attracted to him if I wouldn’t have dated him for so long and I didn’t know his personality? Probably. But that’s not the case.”

Julian nodded, his hunched shoulders relaxing a bit. “I believe you. I just needed to ask.” He cleared his throat. “Did you invite him to the wedding?”

“What?” My voice was louder than I intended as I pushed myself out of his arms and scrambled to my feet. “I hope you’re kidding.”

Maybe he had one too many drinks and isn’t thinking clearly because that cannot be a serious question—especially since he was clearly in contact with Lillian and money was exchanged.

The look in his eyes let me know that he was uncertain. “I’m just trying to understand how he got here. I was asked on camera and I’m not going to lie, it threw me off.”

My stomach dropped. “Oh no,” I griped, my hands covering my face. Even though it wasn’t my fault, I felt bad about him being blindsided with questions about my ex. I dropped my hands from my face and placed them over my heart. “I’m sorry they ambushed you like that, but no, I didn’t invite him. I haven’t talked to him since we broke up…which was why I was shocked to see him.”

Julian stood, his face softening. “No, I’m sorry.” He put his hands on my shoulders, rubbing them comfortingly. “I shouldn’t have let them get in my head. I kept my cool when they asked me about it, but…they just got in my head a little. I trust you. I trust what we have. It’s just the bullshit of the show that made me ask.”

I swallowed hard as I looked up at him, choosing my words carefully. “I understand. It makes sense that you’d want clarification.” I paused. “Speaking of…why did you leave so fast earlier? I was worried.”

“I had to deal with something.” He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me into his body. “I’m sorry I worried you, but believe me, you have nothing to worry about.”

I leaned back. My heart felt like it was in my throat. “Oh really?”

“Really.”

Silence fell around us as he searched my eyes and I searched his. Seconds ticked by and it became harder for me to breathe.

“Where were you when the party started?”

He hesitated, fractionally. “I met with Robert.”

He lied.

My stinging eyes dropped to his chest as I tried to gather myself. I was in shock at first and that was why I didn’t hear what he said next.

“Zoe?”

I felt myself starting to shake a bit. I raised my head and our eyes met. I could see he was holding something back and it hurt me to my soul. I lifted my eyebrows in question. “I missed the last thing you said. I think I need to lie down.”

He walked with me to the bed and watched me as I peeled off my leggings. I sat on the bed and he kneeled down in front of me. He ran his hands up and down my bare thighs as I sat in just a tank top and panties.

“Look at me,” Julian pleaded, trying to catch my gaze.

I looked at him, but it made my eyes water so I looked away.

I wanted to call him on his shit. I wanted to just blurt out what I’d overheard, but the words wouldn’t come without tears, and I didn’t want to cry. I didn’t want to show my vulnerability. I didn’t want to believe that I was two days from marrying a man who lied to me, who was hiding stuff from me, who was having secret meetings with an ex and paying her not to tell me. I wanted to be more evolved than to cry over something as clichéd as that. I wanted to be the strong, independent woman my mother raised me to be.

I will sleep on it and with a clear, level head, I will ask him point blank what is his involvement with Lillian.

“Hey, what’s going on? Are you okay?” Julian inquired, concern etched all over his handsome face.

“I spoke to Robert when I arrived at the meet-and-greet.” My tone was curt, but calm. I resisted the urge to purse my lips even though I felt myself getting mad all over again.

Well, that lasted all of two seconds.

Unable to stop myself, I continued, “So I guess I’m trying to figure out how you were in a meeting with him and I saw him on his way out to the golf course.”

It was the hurt of being lied to and the insult to my intelligence that burned blazingly inside of me. I wanted to have a rational conversation, but I was hurt, tired, and hormonal. I knew if his response felt like a lie, I would snap.

Julian’s fingers flexed against my hips. “I met with Robert about a situation that came up and then I had to deal with the situation directly.”

“What was the situation?” My body was tense as I braced myself for his answer.

He took a deep breath, letting his head drop back momentarily. “I don’t want to stress you out…” He lifted his head. “But Lillian showed up.”

I nodded slowly. “So you met with Lillian?”

He chewed on his bottom lip. “Yes. I met with her. And I told her to leave. I didn’t invite her and I really don’t know why she would even be here.”

“Have you been in contact with her?”

Julian pulled me to the edge of the bed, closer to him. From his kneeled position, he had to tilt his head up slightly. He stared at me, his body rising and falling with each serrated breath, but he didn’t look nervous or guilty. He appeared calm as he firmly replied, “Yes.”

I felt better that he was honest with me, but it didn’t stop the hurt of him communicating with his ex behind my back. I swallowed hard. “Why?”

Silence followed. I could hear my heart pounding in my chest as I waited for him to answer the question.

“Do you trust me?” His grey eyes implored mine, seeking something more than a simple yes or no.

Yes,
I thought immediately. I didn’t even have to think about it. My honest answer was quick and instantaneous.
Absolutely yes.

I looked into his eyes and I felt so conflicted. I saw nothing but love and devotion in his eyes. I didn’t just trust him with my heart; I trusted him with my life.

But I know what I heard.

My mother always said to trust my gut. As I stared at Julian Winters kneeling down in front of me, my heart faltered. Weighing what I’d heard versus what I felt resulted in the extended silence that hung in the air between us.

“Yes, I trust you,” I uttered softly.

Julian grabbed my face, his thumbs stroking my cheeks. “I called her, but I swear to God that it was nothing inappropriate. It was nothing that would disrespect our relationship.”

“Then why can’t you tell me? You travel a lot for work. I work late nights. In two years, I’ve never once thought you were sneaking around or lying to me about anything. I never doubted you, so please explain to me why you can’t tell me what you were talking about with your ex?”

I saw the struggle play out in the storminess of his eyes. I could tell he was wrestling with the decision to tell me.

“Please understand that I don’t want to keep anything from you, and just because I can’t tell you right now doesn’t mean I won’t be able to tell you soon.”

I swallowed hard. I hated not knowing. “Soon? What’s soon?”

“After we’re married.” He paused, a smirk playing on his lips. “Marital privilege and all.”

Did he seriously just make a joke? A lawyer joke at that!

I sighed, pursing my lips to keep from smiling. I tried to turn my face away from him, but he held my face steady.

“I love you, Zoe. I wouldn’t jeopardize you for anything.” His voice was low and gravelly as he moved his forehead to mine. “But if this is going to be a problem, if this is going to come between us, I’ll tell you now.”

Even though his eyes filled with disappointment, he opened his mouth to continue.

I stopped him.

I could see that he didn’t want to tell me, but more importantly, I could see that he would tell me. I didn’t know why he was keeping it from me, but his willingness to tell me pushed down the doubt that threatened to suffocate me.

“No,” I murmured, swallowing my suspicion and apprehension. “I trust you.”

When his lips touched mine, the uncertainty faded away. The force with which he kissed me made my entire body weak. I felt loved and cherished. With one kiss, he’d managed to fill me with so much of our love that doubt was forced out. In that kiss, I was reminded of what we had. When we finally broke away, we were both out of breath as we just gazed at one another.

“I promise…you have nothing to worry about. It’s nothing bad and nothing you need to worry about. On Sunday, as soon as you come down the aisle, I will tell you everything.” He planted a kiss against my lips. “There is nothing I wouldn’t do for you. I don’t want anyone but you. Remember that.”

I nodded and it occurred to me that I really did trust him. My gut told me I could believe him despite what I’d heard outside that room.

Feeling tired, I allowed Julian to tuck me in. He stroked my hair as he crouched beside the bed, staring at me. “Promise me that no matter what, you won’t forget that at the end of this weekend, when it’s all said and done, you’re who I’m spending my life with and I’d do anything for you,” he uttered so softly that my entire body reacted.

“I love you,” I whispered sleepily. “Go change and come back to sleep with me. We won’t be able to sleep together tomorrow night.”

A slow smile stretched across his face. “I love you too. I’ll be right back.”

“Well, that was good,” Koko remarked as we approached the golf course clubhouse after the rehearsal dinner. She rubbed her belly. “Especially after a long day of swimming in a heated pool while the boys grilled and then walking down an aisle on Omar’s arm…and then the pasta at the rehearsal dinner.”

“This has shaped up to be an amazing New Year’s Eve. I mean, the pasta alone,” Keisha sighed as she linked arms with Lenny. “But even more amazing is the fact that our Zoe is getting married tomorrow.”

“I know.” I grinned. “Today made it all feel so real. In twenty-four hours, I’m going to be Mrs. Julian Winters.”

“Regardless of the cameras tonight, we’re going to have a good time,” Keisha reassured us, her voice definitive. “I can’t wait to finally meet the people who were on your session.”

“So you can see who’s really crazy in real life. I’ll give you a hint: all of those bitches are crazy,” Koko muttered in a snarky tone.

I laughed, bumping her with my hip. “Sounds like someone is frustrated with her job.”

She let out a grumbling noise. “I just need a break. It seems like as the show keeps going, the producers have become less concerned with what the guy is looking for and more concerned with what’s going to get ratings. I mean, the crop of women get more and more conniving and just plain mean. They feel like I work for them personally and not the show.” She shook her head. “We’re not getting into that tonight because I’m going to act like I don’t know half of those bitches. It is not only New Year’s Eve, but also Zoe’s wedding eve!”

“And in preparation for a beautiful day tomorrow, we will party tonight. Bringing in the new year right!” Lenny shook her ass in front of us as she climbed the steps to the back door. “This is kind of like your bachelorette party,” she realized as she opened the door for us.

“Bachelorette party!” Koko screeched, throwing her hands in the air and twirling into the clubhouse.

I laughed as my three best friends danced their way inside.

They really are the best.
I smiled as I watched the women in front of me dressed in sexy club dresses and tiaras with the words ‘bridesmaids’ blazoned across the front.
After the day I’ve had, I don’t think I even care that they’re filming tonight.

After some of the best sleep of my life, I’d woken up in Julian’s arms. Once the two of us had played in the shower for nearly an hour, we’d walked downstairs to see the makings of a pool party. Older members of our families and Beverly and her family had worn jackets and were eating burgers from the grill. Our best friends had already gotten in the pool, my brother, his girlfriend, and our cousins were getting in the pool, and we were the last ones to join the party.

After a few hours, we’d gone back into our villas to get ready for the rehearsal and the rehearsal dinner. The rehearsal had been effortless. The fabulous Peri Moore had everything together so when we’d arrived, we just fell into place. We’d gone through the ceremony five different times—the fifth time resulting out of an argument between Beverly and Peri versus Robert Brady and the chief camera operator.

Once we’d finally finished, everyone, except for
The One
crew, had headed to the restaurant where we ate and laughed and talked. It was the perfect day. Our parents and grandparents decided to call it a night, but everyone else wanted to party.

A creaking noise behind me caught my attention. I glanced over my shoulder just as I felt myself being grabbed from behind. “Julian!” I exclaimed as he lifted me briefly. “I didn’t even hear you come in.”