Aftermath (27 page)

With shaking hands, I shot myself full of painkiller. That chemical cocktail balanced the crazy in my head, kept things quiet. The bad news? It was hellishly addictive, and the more I used, the more I wanted. Chem would kill me if this lifestyle didn’t. But I couldn’t shoot up when I worked. It slowed my reflexes too much.

I leaned my head against the wall, no windows in here where people could get to me. My place was functional, nothing more, a one-room convenience in a high-rise. With a job like mine, I needed the security. It would take a small army to get up here.

The drug kicked in, dropping the blessed veil of silence over the incessant clamor of other people’s wants and needs. Exhausted, I took a san-shower, then found a packet of paste. I didn’t keep the kitchen-mate stocked, no point.

A quick stop at the comm terminal informed me that everyone but Franken had made it back. Fucking pitiful. Though I’d known these spoiled Imperial types had dead meat between their ears, I’d never lived through anything as egregious and wasteful as the run on the Ja-Win compound. Good men had died out there, soldiers with families, not that Pilatu gave a shit. He’d pay the death benefits, shrug, then come up with some other asinine strategy in the never-ending war games.

In those days, I felt empty in a way that nothing could assuage. Apart from that icy numbness, I mostly felt rage, a growing and nearly ungovernable need to lash out. Svetlana’s message made me smile, though. I couldn’t wait to see her.

My sister didn’t approve of how I made my living, but she also understood why I chased the credits. When I bought my own ship, it would change everything. I could finally achieve my dream of being out there, far beyond the thoughts baying in my head. Blessed quiet.

I planned to hire Svet on as crew, and she could stop working in that crappy secondhand shop on Gehenna. We’d get together next month, like we always did, and argue over my choices and her stubbornness. Nobody meant as much as Svet; nobody could get away with saying the things she did, either. I’d killed for much less.

Out of habit, I sat down at the comm terminal to check my bank account, as I always did after a job. I compared the tally against what the dream ship cost, then took a look at the Imperial postings to see what my next mission would be—and how much closer that would bring me to buying my freedom from this hellhole.

Sure, I could afford passage off Nicuan, but to what end? I wasn’t a farmer. I didn’t want to go to work programming or overseeing somebody else’s bots. All I knew how to do was kill—and fly. So I’d do the former until I could do the latter. I’d be damned if I piloted to put money in the Corp’s pocket.

“What the . . .” That couldn’t be right. A few taps on the interface and then I spat a curse. The amount I received prior to the Ja-Win job had been transferred out again. Unless he thought I died in the Ja-Win compound, Pilatu was dumber than he looked.

Killing rage boiled up inside me, tinting everything red. I could do this, even under the influence. This job didn’t call for speed, just stealth. After tucking a pistol in my belt and a knife in my boot, I went to pay my respects.

 

Security on Pilatu’s city estate was laughable. It was a lush, lavish place full of expensive statuary, gushing fountains, and well-manicured gardens, all hidden away behind heavy, ornate metal gates. Using a grappler, I went over the wall, dropped behind the hedge, and waited.

I had all night.

The droids came first.

After disabling the patrolling bots, I made my way to the guard outpost. Busy watching the innocuous vid feeds I’d provided, they died without making a sound.

Then the place was mine. A heady surge of power lashed through me, akin to lust. I strolled up to the suite where the noble sat pondering his next move. The man didn’t know it yet, but he didn’t have one.

I closed my hands around Pilatu’s throat. If I squeezed hard enough, I’d crush the man’s windpipe. A twist would snap his neck. I savored each possibility while Pilatu struggled against my grip, trying vainly to see who had him.

“You cheated me,” I whispered into the other man’s ear. “I don’t work for free. Ever. And my payment isn’t contingent on the success of your plan.”

“Let me go,” the noble tried to demand. “Crazy bastard. If they . . .” Pilatu gasped, struggling to get the words out. “Catch you . . . you’ll be . . . executed.”

“Weighed against the pleasure of killing you, I’m finding I don’t care.”

“I have money.” Face purple now, the other man wheezed. “I can—”

“No,” I said with finality. “You can’t.”

A little shiver of pleasure went through me as I wrenched Pilatu’s neck sideways, then let the body drop. About Mary-sucking time—I was so tired of taking orders from these officious little pricks. Now I needed to get off world fast.

I still didn’t have enough cred for my own ship, but what the fuck. There were other worlds, other wars. People always needed killing.

I left the estate quietly and walked a good distance before signaling an autocab. Expedience sent me straight for the spaceport. Maybe I could buy passage on a vessel departing tonight. It didn’t matter where, although Gehenna would be best. Svet would take me in, no questions asked.

But when I got there, the place was very nearly deserted. No surprise, considering it was so late. Droids went about their work in mechanized silence. There was a skeleton crew working the docks and only two ships, neither of which looked ready to go. I stood, hands bunched into fists, considering my options. I really couldn’t stay on Nicuan now, but if I didn’t have a choice—

“Well, well, if it isn’t my least favorite person,” came a deep voice behind me.

I spun, ready to fight, then relaxed a little when I recognized Hon, a tall, dark-skinned pirate from the Outskirts. We’d tussled more than once, but in a friendly way most times. The other man still nursed a slight over some trull that had gone with me instead, but nothing like a blood grudge lay between us.

I grinned. “I’d say likewise, but I despise these Nicuan nobles more than you.”

The pirate laughed, showing bone white teeth. “You make a good point.”

We talked a little while longer before I asked, “So what brings you out so late?”

“Just checking over my new ship.” With a lazy gesture, the other man pointed toward a vessel at the far corner of the docking bay.

Envy panged through me. Piracy paid better than killing, obviously, but you had to have a ship to start with in order to make money that way. For a moment, I considered smashing my fist into Hon’s face. The urge boiled up, but I checked it with real effort.
Better not to make a scene.

“It’s nice,” I said easily, though it cost me. “You heading out soon?”

Hon shook his head. “Need to do a full diagnostic. You know how used ships can be.”

Prick.
Hon knew perfectly well I didn’t. Now he was just taunting me, but surely not over that woman whose name I’d already forgotten. I’d never owned a vessel in my life, just flown simulators to train for pilot certification and gone up once in a real ship at the starport on Gehenna to take the test. Best day of my life.

I made myself smile, though it was getting harder not to lash out. “I don’t, but good luck with it.”

I started to turn, but Hon’s voice stopped me. “What brings you out so late anyway?”

My nerves prickled to life. “Why?”

Hon’s smile became predatory. “You have the look of a hunted man, March. Maybe you’re worth something to me now? Your whereabouts, anyway.”

Before I knew I meant to act, I slammed my fist into the pirate’s face, hard enough that I heard cartilage crunch. Blood spewed from Hon’s broken nose, and while he swayed, I slammed his head against the pylon behind him. I wanted to stay and finish the job, but people would come soon. I couldn’t be here when they arrived.

Instead, I bent and pocketed the remote to Hon’s ship. If it had a jumper on board, we were going to Gehenna. Casually, I made my way across the bay and keyed the boarding ramp down. I strolled on board like I owned it.

Luck spun my way. There was a Rodeisian on board, the foremost source of jumpers outside Farwan. Large and furry with powerful haunches, they didn’t like to work with humans—said they were pink and stinky. This one had apparently made an exception for Hon.

The alien froze when it saw the pistol in my hand. I could kill it as easily without moving a muscle, but there was no reason to brag. I kept my gaze steady.

“Here’s how this is going to go,” I told it. “We’re going to Gehenna. I pilot, you navigate. You get me there safely, you walk away. If anything happens to me, I guarantee you go with me. You can keep this ship for your trouble.” The Rodeisian’s ears perked at that. “Or bounce a message to Hon telling him where you are. Once I walk away, I don’t care what you do. Are we clear?”

“Indeed.” For such a big creature, the Rodeisian had a surprisingly light, sweet voice. This one might be female, which explained a lot. Hon always had a way with the ladies. “You want a ride to Gehenna. So let’s go.”

I had to smile. “As easy as that?”

“I make it a policy never to argue with armed, desperate men.”

The Rodeisian led the way to the cockpit. She took her seat in the nav chair while I contacted ground control and relayed our plan to depart. Without her full cooperation, it wouldn’t have worked. She showed me where Hon kept the registration numbers so I could file the flight plan officially. In fact, she guided me through the process, as if she knew I’d never done this for real before.

She confirmed that with a glance from dark, long-lashed eyes. “I can tell this is your first time. I’ll be gentle.”

I didn’t know if I wanted to hit her or touch her fur to see if it was as soft as it looked. A confusing knot of unfamiliar emotions stirred. It had been a long time since anybody but Svet was nice to me—most people feared me back then—and this Rodeisian had more reason than most. I’d all but taken her hostage, for Mary’s sake.

“Thanks,” I muttered.

Waiting seemed interminable. If Hon regained consciousness before we got out, it would ruin everything. Maybe I should have just killed him. The bastard was talking about turning me in, after all.

“You have clearance,” came the response from the tower, and the hangar above began to open.

I fingered the shunt in my wrist, knowing I’d have to jack in once we were clear of the planet’s gravitational pull. That was how a jump worked, but damn, I was nervous. My hands trembled as I set them on the control panels. The ship twitched in response.

Taking a few deep breaths, I centered myself and tried to remember my lessons.
Like that. Yeah.
An unsteady thrust got us out of the hangar, then I felt like I’d been doing this all my life.
What a fucking rush.

“You’re doing great,” she told me softly.

We pushed upward through the atmosphere, safe at last. My smile felt strange and tremulous as I glanced away from the sensors briefly. The night sky bloomed, stars sparking all around us with a cold, fierce light that made me feel clean in ways I’d almost forgotten—or never known.

“I could die up here,” I breathed, hardly remembering she was there.

I could, too. Happily, even. That’s something we have in common, Jax.

“People have,” she murmured. “People do.”

The silent accord between us felt perfect; I ached with the beauty of flying. And I thought the Rodeisian female felt it, too— that quiet shiver of light refracted from the sensor screens, interpreted by my nervous system as pure pleasure. I’d never known anything like it. The ship felt natural in my hands, an appendage I should have been born with.

“Ready for jump?” I asked eventually.

Her reply sounded suggestive, somehow. “Since the moment you came aboard.”

 

 

When we jacked in, the wetware amplified my power, laying the navigator open. I could sift through her memories as if they were jewels in a treasure box. She knew—and she didn’t seem to mind. More startling, the female wanted me. She liked my anger and brutality, the scent of blood that lingered about me.

Well, if she wanted rage and savagery, she came to the right man.
That much, I could offer. It was, in fact, all I had left. That was the first time I became part of a woman, Jax. There in the cockpit, and I think it prepared me for you.

The ship shivered as the phase drive hummed. I knew how it worked, opening a small wormhole through which we would access grimspace. I’d seen the charts and numbers. And even so, I wasn’t remotely prepared for that first jump.

I flew with her, became part of her. But our link exposed me, too, showing more than I ever wanted anyone to see. I sensed no judgment in her, but it was enough that she’d seen the darkness roiling. Nausea rose in my throat even as my hands responded to her silent directives.

“Here,” she said. “Jump here.”

And I had to trust her. I hit the panel, signaling the ship we were ready to return to straight space. Shaky and queasy from the aftereffects, it took me three tries to unplug. By that time, the Rodeisian was already out of her seat.

I glanced at the star charts, trying to place where we’d come out. Jumps had to take place well away from planetary pull, so sometimes it was a matter of hours before reaching the final destination. But what I saw on the screen didn’t match.

“This isn’t the way to Gehenna.”

“It isn’t,” she agreed. Her huge fist slammed into my temple before I could brace for impact.

The lights went out.

 

 

Distant voices reached me before my brain came fully back online. My head throbbed with a low, dull pain, reminding me of the score I had to settle. Right then, I made up my mind—I’d kill that treacherous jumper if it was the last thing I did.