Alien Collective (53 page)

“T
HIS IS REALLY BAD TIMING.
Give me a couple of minutes to save my husband’s life and ensure the nasty bomb that’s going to kill and/or poison everyone here doesn’t go off. Then I’ll be glad to let you all toss your weight around, okay?”

“This is the leader?” one of the others asked Sandy.

“No, I’m not the leader. Well, I’m ACE’s leader, yes. And I lead our people. Somewhat. But I’m not ‘the’ leader.”

As I said this I noted a couple things. One of which was that Cameron Maurer had reached Christopher and Chuckie. He wrested something from them, and took off running, again bowling people over left and right.

The other was that if Maurer was doing this, then the Superconsciousness Council hadn’t moved us out of time. Meaning that the entire world was seeing this particular showdown. Oh good. I was drenched and bedraggled, so totally ready for my close-up.

“We look around and see how unworthy all of you are,” one of the other shapes said.

“Well, as I look around, I can easily find us unruly, even though we’re all definitely quieting down due to confusion, fear, and the sheer awesomeness of being in your august presences, but unworthy? No. We’re not unworthy. Younger than you, yeah, by millennia or more, I’m sure. Different, absolutely. But unworthy? A few of us, sure. But the vast majority? Worthy. At least as worthy as you. Maybe more so.”

“We find you unworthy,” the one said again.

Contemplated my options. I could beg and such, but I wasn’t in the mood. I could ignore them and try to get to Stephanie, but they’d probably stop me. However, Sandy had told me what their ultimate weakness was, and now I realized exactly why Sandy had done so. It was good to have friends all over.

“And I find you rude. Okey dokey. Guys, or gals, or whatever you are, I hate dealing with formless, nameless beings. Particularly nameless. So, there are seven of you. Line up, names are coming.”

“What are you saying?” a third asked, sounding horrified.

“Well, Doc, I don’t know. Grumpy seems to think we’re unworthy. Happy wants to know if I’m the leader. Sneezy, Sleepy, Bashful, and Dopey haven’t spoken yet, but I’m sure they’ll add in.”

“Who are you naming Dopey?” another one asked, sounding outraged. Despite the situation, heard some giggles from the crowd.

“You, congrats on stepping up. Everyone, meet the Superconsciousness Seven. Sneezy, Sleepy, wave to the audience. Bashful, don’t bother, we’ll figure out who you are. Eventually.” There were a few more titters from the audience. Keeping it light, that was me all over.

“Stop it,” the one I’d named Doc hissed. “You have no right.”

“My world, my rules, my rights. You have no right to come here and try to order us around, Doc. You haven’t come to help us, you’ve come to interfere with us. So you and Grumpy, Happy, Dopey, Sleepy, Sneezy, and Bashful go back to wherever you came from and leave us the hell alone.”

“Stop using those names. I am not named Sleepy!”

“Yeah, you are. You chose it, actually, not me. Isn’t that right, Sneezy?”

“No,” the sixth one said. “I am not Sneezy either.”

“Bashful, what’s the good word? Okay with your name?”

“Not really,” the last replied. “I don’t . . . understand it.”

“Oh, you will. Soon enough. By the way, I heard a lot of I’s in there. Good. Enjoy learning what being an individual feels like. You’ll feel very alone, and then you’ll realize that other individuals can join with you and make you feel less alone, make you stronger, safer. So, in that sense we’re just like you are, only we have to choose to be joined with others. Some of those other individuals are bad. Most are good. That’s pretty much our world in a nutshell. Like it or leave it, but seriously, we have a lot going on, so back off, I’m working here.”

With that, I turned away from them and toward the nasty tableau on the stage next to me. The waterbender had managed to keep her water tunnel going all this time, but it looked weaker. And I was, by now, the very definition of seriously pissed.

I could see the water, see the individual drops that formed it, and therefore see the spaces in between them. I aimed my gun. “Stop with the water, or I shoot. And I won’t miss.”

“Why are you aiming for her, not me?” Stephanie taunted. “I’m the one with a gun to your husband’s head. Or don’t you care about him at all?”

“Oh, I care. I just know when to let someone else handle the big save.”

As I said this, Rahmi and Rhee broke through the water barrier. Rahmi slammed her battlestaff onto the arm Stephanie was using to hold the gun on Jeff, while Rhee pulled him away and out of the range of fire.

Stephanie screamed as her gun dropped to the ground. I was pretty sure her arm was broken. The waterbender stared at me.

“Try me,” I said conversationally. “Maybe I’m wrong and I can’t shoot your head off. But, before you decide, tell me, bitch . . . do you feel lucky?”

She waited another long second. Then the water sloshed onto the stage, and she put her hands up. Apparently she did not.

Claudia and Lorraine hypersped over and put her and Stephanie into restraints, despite Stephanie screaming and starting what sounded like a tantrum. Much nastier restraints than handcuffs.

Looked around. There were a lot of people in the same kind of restraints. Apparently all the good guys had been spending the breather Sandy and his folks had provided in getting the bad guys tied up. Wondered if Sandy had considered this might happen. Decided that he probably had.

Mous-Mous jumped out of my purse and started mewling, meowing, and jumping up and down. It was clear that the Poof was talking to Sandy and the Seven Superconsciousnesses, not anyone else. I let the conversation go on while I went to Jeff and hugged him tightly.

“Can I say, once again, how much I hate how all the bad guys want you on your knees so they can kill you dramatically?”

“It’s because I’m tall. And as long as they don’t actually kill me, I don’t care.” He kissed me. “You were awesome, baby, as always.”

“Yeah.” Surveyed the scene. There were bullet holes through almost every poster, half of the décor was down or halfway down. The video screens were shot up. Many people looked as bad as I did.

Raj came over and handed me his microphone. “Cast your delegation’s votes.”

“Seriously?”

He nodded. “We’ve had the stage long enough.”

I laughed, and turned to the audience. “American Centaurion gives all its votes to the Armstrong-Martini ticket.”

Wasn’t sure what to expect. But someone started clapping, then a few more, and a few more. And all of a sudden the room was cheering again, as if this horrific battle hadn’t just happened.

Sandy set down on the stage next to us. He’d pulled some downed flag streamers in to make himself look solid, just like he had with water and sand. It was no weirder than any of his other looks. No better, either.

“This is us,” I said to him. “We get knocked down and we get back up again.” “Tub Thumping” by Chumbawamba came onto my airwaves as I said this. I laughed again and pulled my earbuds out. “If you try to hurt us, we’ll fight back, and we won’t stop until you go away and leave us the hell alone.”

Sandy shook his head. “No. You’ve proven your worth. You defended the helpless when all you had to do was run away and remain safe.”

“We don’t run away,” Jeff said. “We came to this world and asked for refuge. And in return we promised to help and to protect it and the people on it. That’s still what we’re here for. And that means protecting people we don’t like, who don’t like us right back. Not all the time, but many times.”

Sandy looked around. “Many of your enemies are dead or down.”

“There are always more. Trust me.” Realized that, because I still had the microphone, everyone in the room had heard us. Decided not to care. But I turned the mic off, because what we were going to discuss with Sandy now wasn’t for general consumption. “But, what’s the plan? The Seven Superconsciousnesses going to try to destroy us, take ACE, or similar?”

“No. They’re going to leave.” Sandy sounded amused. “I warned them not to come, but they had to see it for themselves.”

Reached out and took his hand. While I could feel his hand as a real thing, it also felt insubstantial, as if, were I to squeeze it, it would dissolve into nothing. “Thanks for your help.”

“You are welcome. I am not going to join with Paul. Right now, anyway.”

“Why not? Too much excitement for you?”

“No. I wish to visit other worlds, see what their inhabitants are like, learn their good and bad. And unlike those who protect you now, I have less restraint in terms of helping you. I would do what the others are able to avoid—I would help you too much. I would make you dependent upon me, and I would become the despotic god I do not want to be.”

He squeezed my hand, and didn’t dissolve. Instead, he formed, from the inside out. Which was icky, but masked greatly by the décor he’d used as his form outline. Sadly, there were a lot of bullet holes in that décor, so I could still see his internal organs and bones and such. Managed not to gag, but only because I was still so revved up.

Once his skin and hair were on, he smiled at me. “Thank you.”

“You’re going to stay as a human? I don’t think we travel well through space.”

“No. But now that I know how to form as you are, I can do so when I want to or need to.”

Mous-Mous came over, jumped onto his shoulder, and purred. “Mous-Mous, are you staying with Sandy?” Tried not to sound horrified. Failed. I’d promised Jamie I’d protect her Poof. How would I explain that I’d let it go off with some superconsciousness that might or might not ever be back?

“No,” Sandy said gently. “Your daughter’s pet will never desert her. It argued quite eloquently on your race’s behalf, and for you in particular. But just now it was merely sharing its thanks with me as well, in its own way.” Sandy took Mous-Mous off his shoulder, patted the Poof gently, then handed it back to me.

Clutched the Poof to me. “Back into Kitty’s purse.” Mous-Mous purred at me, then did as requested. Checked. I had a lot of Poofs back in there, including Harlie and Poofikins, so all was well in Poof Land. “So, Sandy, what now?”

“Now we leave you. But I will do you one small favor.” He waved his hand and everything was put back in its place, everything was repaired, every single thing. The room, and presumably the rest of the convention center, looked as if nothing had happened.

“Thank you, but yeah,” Jeff said, “we need you to leave. Miracles like that make humans and A-Cs very desperate to bow down and worship.”

“We know. All of us will be leaving. And while we may visit from time to time, we will ensure that the majority never know of it.”

“One thing, before you go?”

Sandy nodded. “I know what you want to know. And as much as I want to tell you, I can’t. It will . . . disrupt the balance of things. This great secret you all must learn on your own.”

“One little hint?” I asked. Okay, I wheedled. Hey, I really wanted to know who the hell the Mastermind was.

“No. I will give you some advice instead. Offer the truce. It will be in everyone’s best interests.” Sandy took my hand and squeezed it one last time. Then he dissolved into thin air, and the others with him did as well.