Almost Lovers (30 page)

“You’ve done a bang up job,” I said with
sarcasm, “I guess Sebastian coming in here and professing his
bleeding heart love for me is your way of trying to keep me here as
a happy prisoner,”

“Profession of love?” asked the Queen.

I didn’t completely trust the surprised look
on her face but it made me wonder if she had been involved to
perhaps a lesser degree.

“His ‘eternal quest for my heart’ pitch,” I
said, dripping with disbelief and mockery, “you’re going to sit
there and tell me you didn’t put him up to it?”

“Sebastian had instruction to follow you
from a distance and form a friendship to get close and ensure your
safety,” said the Queen, “Any professions of love are completely
his doing. Though I did say I would approve of your engagement if
you chose to embrace it as more than a safety net, Prussia,”

She placed her hand on top of mine and I
almost pulled it back but thought better of it. I could go from
plush bedroom prison to a new freezer if I wasn’t careful – I had
no idea what she would do if offended. I pondered the idea of being
married to Sebastian after having wished for a wedding to Robert
for so long. It made my face twist up in disgust at the
requirements. I wouldn’t just be marrying the man that let Robert
die, I would be marrying a monster and I would become a monster,
too, in many ways.

“I would have to be a monster,” I said,
realizing too late that I had just called the Queen a monster to
her face.

I didn’t apologize. I tried not to look
ashamed of what I had said, even though I knew it might hurt or
offend the Queen, but it had been in my heart and I couldn’t back
down from the truth of what I thought of him, of her, of all of
them.

“You’re already a monster,” said the Queen
quietly with a small smile as though I had walked right into a
joke.

My eyes went wide with disbelief and I tried
to rip my hand from hers but she clung to it, the smile still on
her face.

“It’s why you’re here,” said the Queen, her
smile soft but with a laugh just under the surface, “I know this is
all a lot to take in right now. But you are a magnificent gift,
Prussia. You were born a Vampyr, the most perfect vampire in the
universe and it has taken evolution 80,000 years to get there.”

“You’re insane!” I said, pulling frantically
to get my hand back from her in a twisted tug of war that I clearly
had no control over.

The Queen let my hand go as Sebastian burst
through the bedroom door. She regained her composure almost
instantly but I jumped up from the bed beside her and without
thinking much of it, met Sebastian as he ran in. He placed a
protective arm around me and I huddled next to him, letting him
protect me. Somehow I wanted him to protect me from the Queen as
she sat and looked innocently at me, no motion to harm or hurt me
at all. I wanted her to take everything back.

“You’re lying!” I screamed at her.

“What did she say?” asked Sebastian, looking
down at me with his hands on my shoulders.

“She said I’m like you,” I shouted, “That
I’m a monster!”

The words left my mouth and I knew that I
could never stuff them back in. Sebastian’s face became awash in
disbelief.

“You think I’m a monster?” he asked.

“I…I…” I stammered, I had been caught
between disbelief at what the Queen said and insulting my
protector.

This is what a rock and a hard place felt
like. Only both had teeth, both viewed me as a meal and both had
sworn they were trying to help, to save me.

“What she says is the truth,” said
Sebastian, motioning with his hand to indicate he meant what the
Queen had said, “You are a monster, just like me.”

His face became stone-like as he finished
those words and he took a step back.

“Now I understand,” he said, “I will
understand if you refuse our engagement. I will still protect you
as much as I can if that is the case.”

He left quickly. And the room felt cold,
confusing and as if it would close in on me any moment. Every room
in this house had whirlwinds of insanity just waiting to sweep me
off my feet and into strange new territory. Attacked, Kidnapped,
Tortured, Engaged and now I find out I’m just like them.

“I can refuse?” I asked the Queen, “I can do
that?”

“Of course,” said the Queen, “You’re under
protection, you’re not a prisoner,”

She snorted as though I had said something
absurd, the Queen of Vampires sitting there on the bed.

“Why did he say he would try to protect me?”
I asked.

“I told you,” said the Queen, “The court
thinks you are a human. If it gets out that you’re a vampire there
is no telling how our kind will react. They will either want to
raise you up or shred you apart.”

“How long do I have to decide?” I asked.

“Until tonight,” said the Queen.

“That’s ridiculous!” I said, “How can I make
a decision like this under such pressure!”

The Queen rose and walked over to me where I
stood, still at what I felt would be a safe distance from the bed
in the middle of the room. When she walked over to me I didn’t dare
move. I didn’t want to offend her and I didn’t want to risk
becoming quickly deceased.

“There is a loophole,” said the Queen, as
though reluctant to mention it, “You may request anything of your
fiancé, anything at all, and if he can’t deliver what you request
before the wedding you are not required to exchange vows,”

“I would be safe?” I asked.

“You would be safe during the engagement and
that had been our goal,” said the Queen, “Likewise, if Sebastian
chooses not to deliver on your request, your dowry if you will,
then the wedding would be canceled as well. And if you’re not
engaged and not married…it would be very difficult for him to
protect you.”

“How long does the engagement last?” I
asked, not liking the sound of this at all.

“One year,” said the Queen.

The Queen headed toward the door and opened
it to leave. Looking back, she looked at me thoughtfully.

“He only ever loved Lydia,” said the Queen,
“I hope you wouldn’t push him back to her out of your anger at
Robert’s death.”

The Queen looked at me then, a small sadness
in her eyes, “Robert ran from you, Prussia,” said the Queen,
“Sebastian, ran to you,” and the Queen closed the door softly
behind her before the pillow I threw across the room had a chance
to hit her. I hadn’t meant to tell her the part about Robert
running from me, leaving me. It had come out because I had been
emotional. To bring that up, it wasn’t right.

As much as I hated her for toying with my
emotions – I had to make a choice and the obvious choice didn’t
make me happy. I wasn’t a monster and never would be, I didn’t care
what the Queen of Monsters said. I felt a piece of my heart harden
as I picked up the pillow I had thrown at the closed door the Queen
had left through. If I wanted to strike out at someone I needed to
make sure it counted, that it would be worth living in this
nightmare to ensure I stayed alive.

I smoothed the pillow out on the bed and
walked back to the window. The guards did their usual exchange out
on the beautiful grass. They were on time as usual, very
predictable. I watched their dance every ten or so minutes and I
let my thoughts consume me. This time, instead of letting Robert’s
eyes haunt me I let them guide me. And I plotted and plotted and
plotted.

I had been anxious for this ceremony all the
days leading up. I knew now that Prussia thought of me as a
monster. It hurt but I also felt for her. Because when she came to
realize that she and I were the same – I knew she would need my
support and help in coming to terms with it. Even I didn’t entirely
understand but I still counted it as a blessing. If she were simply
human – I don’t know if I could ever convince her I wasn’t a
monster, not after all she had been through and seen. I didn’t
blame her. I just hoped she would let me in. I wanted another
chance.

I hadn’t seen Prussia since she had called
me a monster. I didn’t want to push her any more than I had. She
had a decision to make that could mean her life. I didn’t want to
push her away any more than I already had. I made my way to the
grand staircase platform and ceremonial podium, searching for her
but not finding her. They wouldn’t start for a few minutes still.
She would probably come in almost last to make sure no one did
anything rash.

I scanned the court and saw Lydia, looking
her usual somber self as of late. She stood near the front of the
crowd and off to my left. I’m sure she hoped that Prussia would
refuse my proposal, as many in the crowd probably did. I felt
anxious and nervous all at once and it made me smile. I hadn’t felt
this way in a long time, since the first dozen years Lydia and I
had been together. That had been a long time ago and I welcomed the
feeling again with open arms. I smiled to myself and music began
marking the entrance of the Queen.

Ahead of the Queen came Prussia in a dress
with a long train, long enough to be a wedding gown. The Queen had
made sure Prussia’s entrance would be talked about and remembered.
Prussia looked calm, relaxed and poised. Her procession through the
room and up to the platform took a little while considering the
length of the dress train but before long we were standing
side-by-side listening to the boring formalities of the
ceremony.

Prussia didn’t say anything to me or even
make eye contact. I could feel her anger still. Her anger made her
skin run hot and I could feel it every time my hand ‘accidentally’
brushed hers. After a good amount of time standing in silence as we
listened to formal addresses and ceremonial statements from the
different council members, it came time for Prussia to do her part.
She had to address the court and my proposal.

“I do solemnly accept the proposal of his
Royal Highness, Prince Sebastian,” said Prussia with a steady
voice, “and do look forward to the dowry he will bestow upon me to
honor me and our vows,”

I let out a deep breath I hadn’t known I had
been holding and straightened up tall as Prussia returned to stand
next to me. I couldn’t help but smile and looked to see if the
Queen saw how smoothly it had gone. The Queen nodded to me her
approval with a faint smile and seemed to keep her interest focused
on the monotonous ceremonious declarations of the court.

Lydia, shooting daggers at me from the
audience, didn’t seem pleased at all. I knew she would have been
looking for Prussia to make a different response. I’m sure Lydia
wouldn’t have waited for Prussia to make it to the driveway before
trying to drain her dry too. I somewhat understood her hate of
Prussia, simply because I knew Lydia had a terrible jealous streak,
but it didn’t mean I approved. I felt relief that Lydia saw the
boundaries clearly in place. I didn’t think she would make another
attempt but if she did – she knew where I stood on it. I wouldn’t
let it stand. I would be by Prussia’s side all the time, no matter
what.

I tried to hold Prussia’s hand but she
slipped her hand out of mine and clasped her hands behind her back
instead. No matter, I would win her over sooner or later. At least
I had a chance to win her over.

The Queen stepped forward then, as the
counsel members finally stepped back with all of their pompous
announcements and dictations on the laws and expectations of royal
engagement. The Queen motioned a hand for Prussia and Prussia
stepped forward to join the Queen at the podium. Now it would be
time for the Queen to hand out any titles she saw fit as a future
royal of the court. The Queen had already told the court the title
she would hold, formalities being observed of course.

“Will you to your power cause Law and
Justice in Mercy, according to our respective laws and customs, to
be executed in all your judgments?” asked the Queen.

“I will,” said Prussia.

“I anoint you High Royal Chancellor,” said
the Queen, “This is the royal Law;”

The loudest collective gasp I had ever heard
come out of the court went through the room as though the air had
just been sucked from the room in a great vacuum. Even I found it
hard to keep my mouth closed and my eyes not widened with shock.
What the Queen had just given Prussia couldn’t be taken away. It
couldn’t be undone.

“The things which I have here before
promised, I will perform, and keep,” Prussia repeated, though
slightly confused and hesitant at the reaction of the court, as she
had rehearsed.

“Stand firm, and hold fast, her High Royal
Chancellor Prussia. In the Name and by the Authority of the Queen,
and by the hands of us, establish the Law and Justice in
righteousness that it may stand fast for evermore,” echoed the
court in tones of obligation with a ring of amazement.

A hush fell over the court as I stepped
forward, looking and finding a confused Prussia standing next to
me.

“Why did they gasp?” she asked me in a
whisper.