Always (21 page)

She walked around the fabric bundles and pulled a few of the colors out. “What about this one, Claudia?” She indicated a dark blue shade shimmering with sequins.

“
It’s…” I nodded slowly.

“
And then there’s the dinner party at the Pine’s. I’m not sure if we’ll go to that though. You know last year, young Edward Pine was…”

I let Sylvia’s voice fade away as I ran my hand softly over the blue fabric. It was so smooth and shiny, like I would be wearing a river. Not a muddy river like the one Marcus had taken me to, but a river like the one in my imagination. A river that flowed dark blue through a lush valley. All around me would be mountains, but I would be the calm place in the middle of it all. Everyone would be watching me. And for once, my hair wouldn’t be red, but a rich dark auburn instead.

“
Claudia!” Sylvia’s voice jerked me out of my little daydream.

“
I like this one,” I pointed to the blue material.

“
I was just telling Sylvia here that you were in luck,” Karen smiled. “I just made several gowns for a young woman who then found out she was in the family way. Wouldn’t you know, one of them was in this color.”

I nearly jumped up and down in my excitement. “Do you think it will fit me?”

“
She was just about your size.” Karen put her finger to her chin. “I may have to take it up a little here,” she pointed to my high neckline.

“
Claudia has been meaning to go a little more daring,” Sylvia leered suggestively. “What other colors do you have?”

“
Let’s go have a look.”

I felt like I was floating on a cloud as we went through half a dozen dresses that happened to fit me perfectly. My delight came out in a childlike squeal when we came to the pale green gown.

“
It’s beautiful,” I gushed, “but I have nowhere to wear such a gown.”

“
So dramatical,” Sylvia murmured, but she grinned from ear to ear.

“
This gown would be perfect on you.”

“
Yeah?” I held the floor length fabric up to my body and spun several times in front of the full-length mirror.

“
We’ll take all six.” My mouth dropped open at Sylvia’s words.

“
We will?”

“
Box them up. Our carriage is waiting outside.”

As we left the amazing shop, Sylvia squeezed my hand tightly. “I do have some bad news, though.”

“
What?” My heart hammered in my chest. Would Marcus be angry that we had spent so much money on gowns I may never get to wear?

“
We’ll have to walk part way home.”

“
Oh,” I let my breath out in a gust of relief.

“
I’ll send the carriage ahead and someone will come back for us.”

She crossed quickly to the driver and then came back to take my hand again. “It’s a nice day for a walk anyways,” I commented.

Maybe our walk would give me a chance to talk to Sylvia about Marcus in privacy. She had known him longer than I had, maybe she could give me some answers.

“
Can I talk to you, Sylvia?”

“
About what?”

“
About Marcus.”

She shimmied herself closer to my side with a forced chuckle. “Men are fickle creatures, Claudia,” her voice sing-songed my name.

“
I know, Sylvia, but he loved me last week. What has changed?”

“
Nothing has changed,” she insisted. “He loves you still.”

“
He doesn’t act as though he loves me; more like he hates me.”

“
Claudia.”

“
I’m serious, Sylvia.”

We stopped and waited for a large carriage to pass us before crossing the street ourselves. I was thankful that she was with me; left on my own, I might have been run over.

“
What makes you say that he hates you? Hate is a very strong word.”

Aunt Dora’s words echoed back to me briefly. She had said that love and hate were only separated by a thin line. Only now was I beginning to understand what she meant.

“
Last night he didn’t even stay with me. I have no idea where he went.”

“
I’m sure Silango must have called for him.”

“
That’s another thing I was curious about,” I heard her sigh, but I forged ahead anyway. “While we were in Hamel–before we were married–Marcus and I were chased through the woods by someone he called Ryan. He wanted to hurt me then. Do you think it could have been Silango?”

“
No.” Her answer was immediate and sure.

“
How can you be so sure?”

“
If Silango had wanted you in Hamel, Marcus wouldn’t have stopped him.”

My shock was so great that I had to stop walking. “What do you mean? Do you think he would have let Silango kill me?”

“
If Silango had wanted you, he would have had you.”

She started walking again without me, her strides long and sure. I ran to catch up, the creepy night in Hamel still on my mind. “Sylvia,” I began when I caught up with her.

“
Would you like to walk all the way home, Claudia?” She asked instead of letting me talk.

“
I…” I shook my head, confused by the abrupt subject change.

“
We bought too many things,” she giggled. “The carriage is filled with boxes, so I fear we must walk all the way back to Letrell House.”

“
It’s…fine.” The air was chilly, but a walk sounded refreshing.

“
It’ll only take a few more minutes anyway,” she winked, “even for you.”

“
What’s that supposed to mean?” I skipped a few steps to catch up.

“
You’re slow.”

“
I have short legs!”

“
Come on,” she set the pace a little faster than I was used to. Was it to keep me from asking about Silango?

By the time we reached the house, our boxes had already been delivered to our rooms. “You go on up,” Sylvia ordered. “I’ll send someone up for you when it’s time to eat.”

I happily obeyed her and was pleased to find Marcus in our room. “Hey there,” he called softly. A ghost of his former smile played along his lips.

“
Will you take me to the theater tonight?” I gushed.

He held his arms out so I could sink into his chest. “Is that what all these boxes are?”

“
Sylvia bought me a dress.”

“
For the show tonight?”

“
Yes. You want to see it?” I pulled away from him so I could see his face.

He nodded happily. I whirled away from him to open the lid of one of the long boxes. Blue material peeked from under the paper. “Here’s the one for tonight,” I squealed. “You’ll take me, right?” I watched him with nervous anticipation.

“
Of course,” he nodded slowly. “Of course I’ll take you to the theater.”

“
You promise?”

“
I promise.” He pulled me back to his chest and I wrapped my arms around his waist. Tonight was going to be perfect.

Chapter
Twenty-Three

I bit the inside of my lip nervously. The gown hung on the outside of the closet, staring me down. I sat on the bottom of the bed with my knees drawn up to my chest.

I couldn’t believe I was really going to the theater. In all the letters I had received from Savannah, only one of them had said anything about going to see the ladies all made up and singing; but I knew then that I wanted to see it for myself. Now I was getting my chance.

I pushed my feet off the edge of the bed and scooted forward until my feet touched the floor. I remembered the first time I had been old enough to be included in the Darby Christmas ball. It had been the same sort of nervous anticipation then, too. Only then, Aunt Dora had been there to reassure me.

The door opened then and two women dressed in maid’s dresses stood there, waiting for me to wave them in. I did so with a small tight smile. Becky would have just stormed in after a short knock.

I stood as still as my nerves would allow while they expertly pulled my dress on and hooked the buttons on the back. I was shocked at how low the neckline was. I couldn’t wear this in public.

“
Do you think this is okay?” I nervously asked one of the maids.

“
It’s fine, Miss,” one of them answered with a small smile. The other woman just scowled in my general direction. As soon as they had my hair perfectly in place, they disappeared back through the door.

I sat down in front of the mirror and stared at the reflection with a critical eye. “Not bad,” I whispered.

When I heard the door click open, I assumed it would be Sylvia coming in to check on me. She had said to be ready in fifteen minutes, but I wasn’t sure how much time had passed.

“
Has it been 15 minutes already?” I called over my shoulder.

“
You look beautiful,” a deep voice answered back.

I whirled around on my seat and was delighted to see Marcus standing there. He looked quite dignified in his long dark grey coat and crisp white shirt buttoned to his neck. It warmed my already glad heart to see he was smiling.

I smiled back at him. “You don’t look so bad yourself.”

He came to stand close behind my chair. When I turned back to the mirror, he brought his chin down to rest on my shoulder. His beauty made me pale in comparison, but I admired how well we looked together. Maybe now, things would finally start to get better. A night out together was exactly what we needed.

“
Has Sylvia sent you up to get me?”

“
No,” he shook his head, tickling my neck with his dark hair. “I just wanted to see how beautiful you looked.”

I clicked my tongue. “I hope you didn’t come up here just for that; I’m afraid you’ll be disappointed.”

His blue eyes lit up with mischief, a look I hadn’t realized I missed until that moment when my heart clenched at the sight. “I am not disappointed, Mrs. Letrell.” My heart thrilled at his words. “But I’m afraid you might be,” he sighed.

My smile froze on my lips. “Why?”

“
I’m not going to be able to come with you tonight.”

“
What?” I whirled back around so quickly, he staggered back a step. “You have to go!”

“
I’m not going,” he repeated with more force.

I was outraged. He already promised that he would take me to see the show, and now he’d changed his mind. “I’m already ready to go,” I needlessly pointed out.

He shook his head still. “I can’t, Claudia. I’ve got other things to do.”

“
What other things?” I crossed my arms over my chest, careful not to wrinkle the material.

“
We’re not talking about this.” He raised both hands in the air.

My mouth fell open, but I quickly snapped it shut again. “Yes we are.”

His eyes widened slightly. “No, we’re not going.”

“
Now you won’t let me go, either?”

“
We’ve already talked about this.”

“
I am not going to miss this. We’ll be returning to Hamel soon,” I reminded him.

“
Claudia, I can’t…” He licked his lips and bit the inside of his cheek. “I can’t go,” he finished with less anger. He sighed heavily and ran his hand through his shaggy hair.

He was starting to look really bad, I noticed with growing alarm. Dark purple and black rings hung low under his sunken eyes. His once clean-shaven face was scruffy and his usually neat locks hung in shaggy strands. What was wrong with him?

Silango.

The single word seemed to whisper and vibrate through my skull. It must have been my own thought, but it seemed so loud, like someone else had said it. It made sense, though–all of our troubles had started because of the mysterious Silango.

“
We can take her,” Sylvia offered.

“
We won’t let anything happen to her,” David added.