Always His (Crazed Devotion #1) (9 page)

“Today was amazing,” he whispered, and I swallowed hard. “There’s no way to describe how spending the day playing with Tori and seeing your smile made me feel. I can’t think of one thing I would’ve rather been doing.”

“It was a good day,” I replied, trying to control my breathing.

“One of the best,” Ryker corrected. “And I’m not gonna pretend I don’t want days like this for the rest of my life.” His words made my stomach flutter with excitement I wasn’t sure I was ready to feel. “I want to surround myself with you and Tori every day. I just want you to let me in.”

“It’s gonna take a lot more than one good day to convince me that you and I deserve another shot,” I whispered as my throat burned from denying myself what I really wanted. “I just don’t—”

He pressed his finger pressed against my lips. “Just tell me what you feel in here.” He placed his hand over my heart, and I shivered. “Tell me that you still love me.”

I wanted to tell him that we were in the past. I wanted to protect my heart from the possibility of him ever hurting me again, but I just couldn’t. “I’ve never stopped loving you.”

He smiled, and just the sight of it made my knees weak. “Just let me in, baby. I swear I’ll never hurt you again. Let me be the man you and Tori need. Let me love you both.”

My fight faded with each word he spoke. “If I trust you again . . .” I whispered, my voice vibrating with each word.

“I’ll never give you the chance to regret it.” Ryker pressed his lips to mine, and almost instantly my knees grew weak. The rapid beat of my heart made me feel light-headed, and the emotional connection I had always felt with Ryker came rushing back. Only now it felt as if it was multiplied by ten.

“I love you so much I can’t think straight. You’re all I see,” he whispered against my lips. “You’re all I’ve ever seen.” He kissed me once more, and I knew I had no hope of holding back.

I loved Ryker. I loved him even when I’d hated him for leaving me. He had always been and would forever be the one who held my heart. “I love you too,” I whispered, and he smiled. “Just promise me that you won’t leave again.”

“I’m not going anywhere without you and Tori,” he assured me.

My knees grew weak as he trailed his tongue over my lower lip. I opened my mouth for him and sucked on the tip, and he moaned. Ryker had a talented mouth, and memories of those moments I was lucky enough to experience it came rushing back. A flood of lust ran through me, and I rose onto my tiptoes, needing to be closer to him.

Ryker slipped the hand gripping my hip around my waist and cupped my ass. He lifted my leg and hooked it over his hip, then pushed his erection against me, which had my mind flying off in a million different directions.

“Tell me to stop,” Ryker said in a husky tone. “Because you know I’ve never been able to control myself around you.”

“No,” I whispered as I thrust my hips forward in search of the relief I needed.

“Are you sure about this?” he asked, and I nodded as I trailed kisses along his jaw. “Say the words, Nic. I need to hear ’em.”

I nipped at his jaw, and he moaned and he palmed my ass, his fingers seeking more. My thin pajama pants offered no resistance to his touch.

“Tell me,” he said again.

“I want you,” I replied. “I want this. Don’t stop.”

He bent at the knees and hoisted me from the floor as I wrapped my legs around his waist, securing my body against his.

The moment we reached my room, he laid me down on the bed and covered me with his body. “I’ve dreamed of this,” he said as he kissed along my neck. “Feeling you beneath me, your touch. I’ve craved you every fucking day since I left, Nicole.”

God, why the hell did he feel so good? Every touch set my body on fire. Every kiss made my mind race.

“I want everything with you,” he whispered against my collarbone as he nipped and soothed the ache with a flick of his tongue. Ryker slipped his hand beneath my shirt and upward to cup my breast. My nipple hardened at his touch as he pulled down my bra and pinched it gently between his fingers. He rose onto his knees and leaned down to trail kisses above my belly button and along the waistband of my pants.

Instinctually I arched my back, pressing my body upward, begging for more. “Mm,” I moaned. “That feels so good.”

“It’s about to feel a whole lot better,” he added as he released his hold on my breast, hooked his fingers in the sides of my pants, and began lowering them over my hips, along with my panties. I swear he growled as he placed his hands on my thighs and pushed my legs apart. His mouth descended on me before I had a chance to think about it. The mixture of his tongue with his fingers quickly drove me toward my release as my body bucked against him. Flashes of light exploded in my vision as my body hummed from the most intense orgasm.

Ryker began kissing upward over my stomach as he raised my shirt. “Still so fucking sweet,” he said before he flicked his tongue out to touch my moistened skin. He pulled my shirt over my head and tossed it to the floor. That knowing smirk pulled at his lips as he lowered his mouth to mine.

I could taste myself on his lips. It was so erotic.

My head was spinning as my senses went on high alert. Every kiss and touch only enhanced the uncontrollable urge to demand he take me right then. Part of me thought it was a mistake to move this fast after everything we’d been through. But the other part of me knew how good we were together. I knew Ryker wasn’t using me because it wasn’t in his nature. Yes, he had hurt me, but I knew now that he’d thought he was protecting me by doing so.

I began unbuckling his jeans as he hovered over me, looking down between us to watch my movements. His eyes glazed over as his tongue rested against his lower lip. Pushing his jeans down past his hips, I bit down on my lower lip in anticipation of what was to come.

His boxers outlined his heavy cock as I reached inside them and took him in my fisted hand. His breath picked up as I moved it over him, stroking his thickness. As moisture pooled at the tip, I grazed it with my fingertip, smearing the slickness.

“You’re killing me, babe,” he said in a pained whisper.

The idea of torturing him made me feel seductive. So I continued to stroke him as my eyes met his.

“You know exactly what you’re doing,” he said as he stared at me. “You were never this patient, baby. It was always me that had to slow you down.”

He was right, but I loved the hungry look in his eyes. I loved knowing he wanted me so badly.

“Condom,” he said, his voice deep and husky.

I nodded as I released my hold on his cock, and he scurried off the bed in a humorous hurry. He pulled his wallet out of the pocket of his jeans, found what he was looking for, and moved back to join me.

As I yanked his shirt over his head, I saw the tattoo on his chest, and my own chest tightened. The knowledge that he carried my name and his love for me there for anyone to see warmed me so deeply.

He paused next to the bed, and I watched in awe as he sheathed himself before crawling back onto the mattress and placing his body over mine. His mouth covered mine as his tongue dove between my lips and he moved his hips against me. His hardness sliding over my sensitive clit made my eyes roll back and my body shiver beneath his.

“This changes everything,” he said as he pulled back from our kiss and his eyes met mine. “I know it’ll take work, but I’m willing to do anything it takes to have you back in my life. I’ll spend every day showing you just how much I want you.”

My eyes filled with tears as he pulled his hips back and the tip of his cock found my entrance. Within seconds he was sliding inside me, and all thoughts faded away as I relished in the pleasure he gave me.

I didn’t know what tomorrow would bring, but I knew in that moment nothing else mattered.

I
took deep breaths as I tried to calm my erratic heartbeat. My forehead rested against Nicole’s as she soothingly trailed her fingertips over my shoulders and down my arms. My head was spinning and my chest felt tight, but I’d never felt more relaxed. Raising my forehead from hers, I opened my eyes and found her staring back at me. Without speaking I placed my lips to hers and tried to tell her everything I was feeling through my actions. If I thought I was in deep two days ago, that had nothing on what I was feeling now.

“I love you,” I whispered before kissing her once again.

She was just about to respond when we heard “Momma?” echoing down the hall. We tensed and looked toward the door, our eyes wide. Within seconds we were scrambling around the room, gathering our clothes and doing our best to cover our bodies. With one leg in my pants, I was hoping around trying to put my other leg in when I stumbled and fell on the bed. Nicole snickered, and then we both looked toward the bedroom door, waiting for Tori to enter. Nicole was dressed fully as she gathered my T-shirt and tossed it toward me. “I’ll go entertain her. Hurry up.” That gorgeous smile of hers made my stomach flip just like it always did when she smiled. She was so damn beautiful it was painful.

“Well, it didn’t take you long,” Ben said on the other end of the phone as I stood outside Lucy’s, leaning against my truck with a smile on my face. “Sounds like everything is working out.”

This was the first time I’d gotten to talk to Ben since I left Germany. He still had eight months left in the Marines before he had to reenlist or choose a different path. Luke was younger than Ben and I and had two years left. I missed the guys, but I definitely had no regrets for choosing to return to Alabama.

“We’re working on it. We still got some things to hash out and she’s still skittish, but she has reason to be. But we’ve got time because I ain’t going nowhere.” I paused as two girls walked by smiling at me, flirting without the words. But they held no interest to me. “Nicole’s what I want, and I’m not giving up ’til I got her. And hell, Ben, you should see Tori. Her little girl is damn sweet. There’s no way in hell I couldn’t love her as much as I do her momma.”

“I’m happy for ya, Ryker. I know Luke and I gave you shit because it’s what we do, but I’m happy for you. Sometimes I think how great it would be to have a girl, a family. This life is lonely; you know that.”

Ben and I were the same age, and he was usually hard to crack, but we’d talked about his ex who lived in Maine. At the time, he didn’t want another relationship because of how she had cheated on him, but now I could tell he longed to have that connection again.