Read Always My Girl (The Shaughnessy Brothers) Online
Authors: Samantha Chase
“You got that right.”
“Come on. The sooner we get there, the sooner we can help you figure out the best plan for your future.”
Right now, the only plan Anna had for her future was remembering to breathe.
* * *
“I’m not sure what we’re supposed to do in this kind of situation—drink, eat, cry, throw things. Seriously, I’m clueless,” Aubrey said when she and Zoe were alone for a minute. Anna had gone to the guest room to put her things away, so they were taking the time to discuss strategy.
“If it were up to me, we’d leave her here and go and beat Quinn upside the head with a heavy object,” Zoe hissed, checking over her shoulder to make sure Anna hadn’t come back into the room.
“I don’t think it would solve any of this.”
“Yeah, but I’d feel a lot better.” With a sigh, Zoe sat down on the sofa. “The thing is, I’m proud of her.”
“What? Why?” Aubrey looked completely confused as she sat down next to her sister-in-law.
“I’ve known Anna for a while now, and I’ve watched her fawn over Quinn for most of that time. Don’t get me wrong. I love Quinn. I really do. But he is beyond clueless.”
Aubrey nodded. “Aren’t they all?”
“Oh, absolutely! But out of all the Shaughnessys—hell, out of all men—right now, he takes the cake.”
“I thought he had potential.” She looked over at Zoe with a sad smile. “I really did. The weekend they came and stayed here with us? I watched the two of them and thought, ‘Okay, he’s finally getting it.’ Even Hugh kept commenting on how nice it was to see his brother finally get his head out of his butt.”
Zoe laughed. “Yeah, Aidan thought the same thing. I’m sure most people would look at the situation and think it wasn’t that big of a deal. So he forgot about dinner. It happens. Hell, there are times it still happens to both me and Aidan—you get caught up in work and next thing you know, you’re late.”
“I don’t know. I don’t think it’s so much the dinner as much as what he was doing. I knew those stupid cars were going to come back and bite them eventually. He should have walked away from them right after the whole incident with Jake.”
“I agree. Hell, we all think that, but Anna—being Anna—didn’t want to jeopardize the chance of Quinn getting some publicity for his restoration business. Personally, I would have just told him to suck it up and find another classic car enthusiast to do business with, but that’s just me.” She shook her head. “Quinn’s just used to doing things his own way and not really having to think about anyone else.”
“We all can have that tendency, Zoe,” Aubrey said. “But once you get into a relationship, you tend to make an effort to change. He’s too smart not to know that by now. It’s almost as if he sabotaged the relationship on purpose.”
Zoe shifted in her seat and faced Aubrey, her gaze narrowing. “Go on.”
A small smile crossed Aubrey’s face. “Okay, Quinn’s been upset about how everyone keeps bringing up his past, that he’s selfish, blah, blah, blah… It bothers him.”
Zoe told her about the lunch Aidan and Quinn had had. “I know he told me in confidence, but I don’t think the rules apply here. So, okay, Quinn was upset and feeling insecure. But why would he just jump ship like that? It seems cowardly.”
“Or maybe he was being proactive. You know, forcing her to leave him now before things got serious.”
“Please, they’ve been serious for a long time—long before they started dating, the two of them were serious. It was weird, and Quinn was the only one who didn’t see it.”
“Wow, he really is clueless,” Aubrey said and sighed. “Well, then I’m stumped. I’d like to think he was being a gentleman and hurting her now rather than devastating her later.”
Zoe shook her head. “Anna’s been in love with him for so long, she was going to be devastated no matter what. I hate that for her.”
“But you said you’re proud of her. Why?”
“She always made excuses for him—or accepted the excuses he gave her. In the end, she knew she was going to be devastated and knew walking away was going to hurt. But she did it anyway. For once, she really stood up for herself and put herself first. It’s not an easy thing to do.”
“Tell me about it.”
Zoe smiled. “Exactly! You did it with Hugh, so you know exactly how it feels. You walked away because you wanted Hugh to have the life you didn’t think you could give him. It hurt and you were miserable, but at the time, you were being selfless. Our girl had to do something she’d never done before; she had to be selfish. And she’s the least selfish person I’ve ever known. And I know it’s killing her.”
“So my original question stands: What do we do? Eat, drink, cry? Are we supposed to find pictures of him and throw darts at it or something?”
With a sigh of her own, Zoe rested her head on the back of the sofa. “Unfortunately, I think we’re going to have our hands full with all of the above.”
Aubrey stood and stretched. “I’ll get started baking the brownies.”
Zoe followed her into the kitchen. “What other kinds of junk food have you got?”
“Not much. Hugh’s been a bit militant about what kind of things I eat and drink. He wants to make sure the baby and I are healthy.”
Zoe glanced over at her. “Come on, you know you’ve got a secret stash hidden somewhere. And if you don’t, I’m going to the store and making sure you have one after we leave.”
With a laugh, Aubrey reached into one of the kitchen drawers and pulled out a pad and pen. “You have no idea what a lifesaver you are! I was planning on going to the store while he was gone, but I was enjoying the peace and quiet too much to get out yesterday.” She began to quickly make a list and soon tore the paper off the pad and handed it to Zoe.
“Chips, dip, caramels, muffins, doughnuts,” Zoe read off the list. Then she looked at Aubrey and smiled. “Baby steps, little mama. We can’t have you gaining ten pounds while your husband’s gone. He’ll never let me visit you again!”
They were both laughing hysterically when Anna walked into the room and eyed them curiously. “What’s so funny?”
They walked over and flanked her on both sides. “We’re going food shopping,” Zoe said, “to make sure Aubrey has a secret stockpile of junk food to tide her over for a while when Hugh gets back.”
Anna chuckled and took the list from Zoe’s hand. “You might want to add fried chicken, mashed potatoes, ice cream, peanut butter, and gummy bears.”
“Um…that’s kind of specific,” Aubrey said. “And I don’t think I’d be able to hide all those things from Hugh. And I’m not particularly fond of gummy bears.”
“Oh, that wasn’t for you,” Anna said and walked over to grab her purse. “That’s for me. And that’s just to get me through lunch. We’ll decide the rest while we’re roaming the aisles at the grocery store.”
Zoe looked over at Aubrey and shrugged. “You wanted to know how it works? We’ll go in stages. Eating is obviously going to be phase one. Remind me to add tissues to the list because the crying phase will be here before you know it.”
For more than thirty years, Ian Shaughnessy had been there to pick up his kids when they fell. It almost became a full-time job after his wife died. And at that moment, he’d have given anything to have been dealing with something more straightforward, like a scraped knee or losing the big game. When he stepped into the restoration garage his heart broke.
His son—his strong and confident son—was sitting on the floor in the middle of an empty garage. He looked beyond sad—he looked broken. Ian wasn’t a fool. He had found out what had happened a week ago, but he knew that his son was going to need a little time before anyone would be able to talk to him. From the looks of it, maybe he’d waited too long.
Without a word, Ian walked over and sat on the floor beside him—not an easy task for a man his age, but sometimes you had to take the pain. They sat in silence for a few minutes. Quinn didn’t even blink when Ian sat down. If there was one thing Ian knew about his son, it was how stubborn he was, and he had a feeling that if he didn’t say something soon, Quinn would be content to just let them stay like this.
“Business is booming up front,” Ian said mildly. “There’re a lot of cars lined up to be looked at. This town’s needed a quality mechanic for a long time. I’m glad we have that now with you.”
No response.
“You missed dinner with everyone Sunday. Owen surprised us all and showed up just as we were sitting down.” He chuckled. “I haven’t seen this much of that boy in I don’t even know how long. It’s nice that he takes the time to get away and come home more often. Of course, I wouldn’t mind a phone call or two in between visits so I’d know when he’s coming home.”
Nothing.
It was time for a different approach. “Your mother used to call you her all-or-nothing child.”
Quinn turned and silently faced him.
“Did you know that?”
Quinn shook his head.
“We used to laugh because there was never any middle ground with you—from the time you were a baby, you were the one who took things to extremes.” He chuckled. “You’d spite yourself and I don’t even think you were aware of it.”
“What—” Quinn cleared his throat. “What do you mean?”
“Well, there was the bicycle thing. You were told you could ride it as long as you didn’t race it.” He looked at his son. “But you wouldn’t compromise, and you raced until the bike got taken away.” Ian shifted to try and get a little more comfortable. “Then there was baseball. My God, were you gifted. You were one of the best players I ever saw. But when your coaches reminded you how they had to let everyone play, you quit.”
“Yeah, well…some of those guys had no right being on the field.”
“Oh, I agree. But part of good sportsmanship is letting everyone have a turn—even if it means losing the game. You can’t tell me you didn’t miss playing.”
Quinn nodded. “What’s the point in playing if you aren’t allowed to win?”
Ian chuckled again. “I can see your point, but you’re missing the bigger picture here. Rather than follow the rules, you chose to walk away. The team went on without you. The only one missing out was you.”
“It wasn’t that big of a deal.”
“And what about racing?”
Quinn frowned. “What about it?”
“You walked away at the height of your career. Why?”
“My best friend got killed in a crash, Dad. It was horrible. I didn’t want to put you and everyone through what his family was going through.”
“How many crashes had you witnessed during your time on the circuit?”
“I don’t know…dozens.”
“How many deaths?”
Quinn shrugged. “A few.”
“Over the course of your life—just your everyday life—have you seen people get hurt and die?” Ian asked quietly.
“Dammit, Dad!” Quinn shouted and jumped to his feet. “What the hell kind of question is that?”
Slowly, Ian stood up. “Accidents happen all the time, Quinn. Whether you’re on a racetrack or running errands or standing in your own home. Your mother was a perfect example of that. Did you love racing?”
“You know I did!”
“Then why leave?”
“I just told you,” he replied with an angry huff. “What’s your point?”
“The point is you have a tendency to walk away when things get tough or they don’t go your way.”
“I didn’t walk away from anything,” he said with a low growl.
“And yet I’m standing here in the middle of an empty garage.” Ian gestured to the open space around them.
“Yeah, well, that wasn’t walking away. It was the right thing to do. I should have done it months ago. I got so caught up in something that could possibly happen two years down the road that I wasn’t paying attention to what was happening right now.”
“You’ve turned down a couple of decent restoration offers since though,” Ian pointed out.
“I wasn’t feeling them.”
“You love cars. You’ve always loved cars. I think you’re full of crap.”
Quinn’s eyes went wide. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me. I think you’re full of it.”
“Dad,” Quinn said with a slight stammer, “what’s gotten into you?”
“I think sending those cars back to Jake Tanner was the right thing to do—and so was telling that reporter the reason why.”
“I didn’t… I never said…”
“Yeah, well, you’re not the only one who was going to be part of that interview.”
Quinn rolled his eyes. “Dad, please tell me you didn’t tell Ken what Jake did.”
“Why not? Why shouldn’t I? What that man did was criminal, Son! And all he got was a slap on the wrist and probation! He pulled the celebrity card and got to go on his merry little way! I don’t think it’s right, and I certainly don’t think it’s fair to Anna.”
At the sound of her name, Quinn winced.
“Now I don’t think Ken’s going to write about what I told him, but I’m pretty sure his magazine won’t be doing a story on Tanner either.”
“I guess that’s something.”
“Anyway, he sent you two potential clients and you blew them off. Why?”
Quinn walked over to his tool bench and began moving things around. Ian came over and stood beside him, waiting. “I just… I can’t.”
“Why?”
“It’s because of my selfish behavior and because of this business I was so hell-bent on having that everything went wrong. Maybe it just wasn’t meant to be.”
“Hmm…maybe,” Ian said with a shrug. “Or maybe you’re just following form and running because it didn’t go your way.”
Quinn threw a wrench across the garage with a feral growl before facing his father again. “You know, why is it that you’re compassionate and loving when everyone else has a problem, huh? You give everyone these heartfelt pep talks to lift them up, and all you’ve done since you got here is kick me while I’m down!”
“It figures you’d see it that way,” Ian said. “Because I see it as giving you the lift you need to get up off your ass and finish something!”
All the fight left Quinn as confusion took over.
“When Aidan came to me about his fears about Zoe, we talked. He didn’t sugarcoat it and he didn’t lay blame on anyone. We talked until he figured it out. Then we cried.” He paused. “When Hugh came to me about Aubrey, I had to point out to him how his obsession about always wanting to be safe played a big part in why they didn’t work out. But in the end, I encouraged him to take a risk. Do you think it was easy for either of them to admit they were at fault in any way? Do you think it’s easy for any of us to admit to that?”
“I don’t like to think about having any weaknesses,” Quinn said. “I don’t want anyone to see that side of me.” He looked up at his father sadly. “Anyone.”
“You’re human, Quinn. We all have weaknesses. It doesn’t make you less of a man.” He looked around the garage. “You’ve always required a bit of a different approach. Aidan and Hugh are a little more sensitive. Don’t get me wrong. They’re tough and dependable men, but in their own ways, they were always ostensibly cautious.”
“But you’re basically telling me I am too,” Quinn reminded him.
“You’re cautious in a way that doesn’t make you seem like you’re cautious. Only someone who really looks would see it.” He smiled. “I’m really looking, Son.” When Quinn didn’t respond, Ian continued. “I’m not going to sit here and wax poetic with you. I didn’t do it with your brothers either. I can only guide you to the best of my ability. And you don’t need to hug it out. You don’t need to cry. But you do need a solid kick in the ass.”
“Hey!”
“It’s true! I want you to finish something,” he shouted—and Ian never shouted. “Just once, I want you not to walk away because something got tough. Here’s a bit of news for you, Son: not everyone gets their way all the time, and they don’t all take their toys and go home.” He huffed and raked a hand through his hair. “That’s not who I raised you to be and that’s not who your mom wanted you to be.”
Quinn took a shaky breath. “Oh man…”
“She said you were her toughest—and she meant it in the best possible way. You do hate to show weakness and sometimes that’s a good thing. Other times, well…not showing your weaknesses is what makes you weak. Make her proud, Quinn. Show her, and the whole world, how tough you are.”
“What if the business fails? You know, on its own, because I’m not as good as I think I am?”
“What if it succeeds?”
Quinn frowned. “Things fail all the time, Dad. Even with all the attention in the world.”
“That’s true. But then you can look back and know you did everything possible and gave it your all. And when that’s the case, no one can look at you like you’re a failure.”
They stood in companionable silence for a few minutes. Ian walked around the shop, touching tools and simply checking things out. He turned back toward Quinn. “Martha and I had dinner with the Hannigans last night.” He almost smiled at how Quinn paled, although he wasn’t sure if was the mention of Martha or the Hannigans that did it. “It was kind of nice. We barbecued and played cards and just visited.”
A weak smile and a nod were Quinn’s only response.
“By the time we got done talking about all of you kids and how everyone is, half the night was gone. Bobby’s thinking of transferring to South Carolina,” Ian said with a shrug. “He says it’s just time for a change.”
“Good for him,” Quinn mumbled.
“And we talked about Aidan and Zoe planning their Australia trip, Aubrey’s pregnancy, Riley’s music, Owen’s promotion, Darcy’s school, your shop, and…Bobby’s move…” He paused and sighed. “Hard to believe there are so many of you.” Once again, his son’s reaction was pretty funny. “Oh, I know who I forgot.”
Quinn seemed to perk up.
“Stanley.”
“Excuse me? Who’s Stanley?”
“He’s Martha’s French bulldog. He’s the funniest little thing!” Ian chuckled. “Honestly, that dog has the personality of a human. I never considered myself a dog person, but he has me reconsidering. Sometimes I think he’s going to just get up and talk to me!”
The poor boy looked deflated. “That’s nice, Dad.”
“Anyway, I guess I should be going. Martha and I are going to the movies tonight.” He pulled Quinn close and hugged him. “Think about what I said.”
With a nod, Quinn said, “Okay. I’ll make some calls and get those cars in here.”
Ian shook his head and patted his son on the arm. “You don’t really think this was all about some cars, do you?”
“Hell no. But I’ve got to start somewhere, don’t I?”
* * *
Life was moving on—just barely.
Hugh had finally closed on the property and Anna had received her commission. It was really quite exciting to get that large of a check. After paying off some bills, she put another chunk into savings and then knew what she needed to do next.
Picking up the phone, she called the car dealership she knew Quinn had purchased her car from. After thirty frustrating minutes, she wasn’t able to convince them to let her pay off the car. “Well, now what?” she murmured. A knock at her door had her looking up just as her brother walked in.
“Hey, squirt! What’s going on?” he said with an easy smile. He kissed her on the head and noticed her frown. “Seriously, what’s up?”
She explained the situation about the car. “I know I don’t have to do anything, but I need to. Every time I get in the damn thing I think of Quinn.” She looked up at him helplessly. “What do I do?”
Bobby quietly studied her. “This is just a suggestion, but…”
“But?”
“I’m going to be out of town for a while, so why don’t you take my car?”
She looked at him oddly. “Why? Aren’t you taking it with you? You’re only going to South Carolina, not South America.”
He chuckled. “Yeah, but…I’m sort of ready for a complete change. I already have a new car picked out, and the financing is good to go without using my car as a trade-in. So why don’t you take my old car and give the Honda back to Quinn.”
Unable to help herself, she lowered her gaze to her hands. “I don’t think I could handle seeing him, Bobby. Not yet.”
His arms came around her as he hugged her tight. “No worries there. I’ll drop the car off.”
Anna immediately lifted her head. “Oh…no. I don’t want you to do that.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’ll just use it as an excuse to start a fight with Quinn.”
“So? He deserves it! Dammit, Anna, I hate seeing you like this!” He looked like he was about to say more and then stopped and seemed to relax. “You know, you should come with me to South Carolina.”
“Are you crazy? Why?”
“I would think it was obvious—you need a fresh start too. Look, I don’t want to upset you but it needs to be said. This is a small town. You’re not going to be able to avoid Quinn forever. There’s gonna come a time when he moves on and, true to form, he’s not going to give a damn if it hurts you.”
“He wouldn’t—”
“Just stop, okay? Are you prepared to run into him and one of his bimbos?”
She sighed with irritation. “Do people even use that term anymore?”
“Trust me, I’m toning my choice of words down to be nice. Think about it, Anna. If you stay here, there’s always going to be that possibility. The two of you have been in each other’s pockets since you were kids. He’s always going to be there—or here. With this new shop he’s got, it seems like he’s going to be here even more than he used to be. He’s not traveling as much and he’s not in a rush to go anywhere. How are you going to handle it?”