Amos and the Vampire (5 page)

“That’s Uncle Horace,” C.D. said when the man had left the room. “He’s the main reason we invited you here.”

“Oh, really?” Dunc edged over to the tray and stood in front of it. He pointed at a painting of wildflowers hanging on the opposite wall. “That’s a wonderful picture. Who painted it?”

While everyone looked away, he managed to pour a little of the powder into each glass.

C.D. turned and fixed Dunc with an icy stare. “We don’t know. It was here when we moved in.”

Dunc picked up the tray and passed it around. “Boy, this really looks good. Everybody drink up.”

Amos mouthed the words, “Did you slip them the poison?”

Dunc nodded. He watched his hosts and made sure they each had a sip of tea.

Nothing happened.

The woman set her glass on a table. “As my son was telling you, Uncle Horace is the reason we invited you tonight. When we finally caught him the other day, he described you perfectly.”

“You dorks have been here before?” Amy demanded.

“Now, now. Don’t be too hard on them, my dear.” C.D. touched Amy’s arm lightly. “They didn’t know that we have to keep Uncle Horace in the house. Horace is sweet, but you may have noticed that he’s a little off.”

“Which brings up another problem,” C.D.’s father remarked. “One I’m sure you can help us with.”

“What is it?” Amy said in a gushy voice.

“The Dragos come from an old Transylvanian family line. When people hear that, they prejudge us. Especially when they see Uncle Horace and find out that he’s not all there.” C.D.’s father took another sip of tea. “Why, we even have a lunatic from England who has been following us around the world for years claiming that we’re—this part will make you laugh—vampires.” The older man chuckled.

Amos frowned. “You mean you’re no—owww!”

Amy had elbowed him in the ribs. “Please go on, Mr. Drago.”

“That’s about it. We’ll be leaving soon to take Uncle Horace to a doctor in California. But we’d like to come back here for vacations occasionally, and we just didn’t want any of those nasty rumors to get started.”

Amos stood. “Dunc, we have to use the bathroom.”

“It’s up the stairs to the left.” C.D. laughed.

Amy’s shoulders drooped. “Why wasn’t I born an only child?”

Amos pulled Dunc up the stairs and into the bathroom. “What have you got to say for yourself?”

“What are you talking about?”

“I’ll admit they’re a little weird. But they drank the tea, and it obviously didn’t hurt them. They’ve explained everything that’s been going on. What more could you want? Can we go now?”

“I don’t know, Amos. What if they’re faking?”

“How do you fake not being poisoned?”

Dunc sighed. “You have a point there. But what about dinner?”

Amos opened the bathroom door. “Leave that to me.” At the bottom of the stairs he bent over and started moaning loudly.

Everyone in the parlor rushed out.

“Oh, you poor thing. What on earth is the matter?” Mrs. Drago patted his back.

“Stomach flu,” Dunc volunteered. “Looks like a bad case. We better get him home right away.”

“What a shame. Perhaps you can all come back another time.”

Amy glared at the boys. “I doubt they’ll still be around.”

Amos moaned again for effect and headed out the door with Amy on his heels.

Just before he stepped outside, Dunc noticed something. The Dragos were all standing in front of a full-length mirror, and the only reflection he could see was his own.

He whirled around.

They were gone.

“What a miserable night.” Amos took another bite of cereal. “I can’t believe it turned out so bad.”

Dunc sat at the other end of the table, looking equally depressed. “I know. We were so close to catching the Dragos, and we let them slip right through our fingers.”

“Who cares about that? Melissa will never speak to me again.”

“She never spoke to you before. Tell me again how you got your antler stuck in the trash compactor.”

“Amy. She followed me to the party and tried to carry out her threat. She would
have made it too if Melissa’s dad hadn’t walked in.”

“What happened?”

“She told him I had escaped from a mental institution, so he called the police. They had to saw off one of my antlers to get me out. I spent the rest of the night downtown.” He yawned. “All I want to do now is sleep.”

“You can’t sleep, Amos. What about the vampires?”

Amy stuck her head into the kitchen. “Someone’s at the door and he wants to talk to you two barfwads.”

Dunc walked past her. “Amy, did anyone ever tell you that you were totally prepollynosis?”

“No, but if I find out you called me something bad I’ll flush you.”

“That was a good one,” Amos whispered. “What did you call her?”

“Nothing. I made it up. I figure she’ll spend all day trying to find out what it means.” Dunc led the way to the front door. Mr. Simpson, the man who had given them the note at the library, was standing on the porch.

“Hello, boys. Mr. Watson would have come by himself, but he’s on his way to California chasing after the Dragos.”

“They’ve already left?” Dunc asked.

“Early this morning. Apparently they dropped this note off at the motel desk. It’s for you. Sorry to have to run. But I’ll miss my flight.” The tall man walked hurriedly down the sidewalk and stepped into a waiting cab.

Dunc ripped open the envelope.

“Hey!” Amos yelled. “What’s this ‘associate’ stuff?”

“Let me read the letter, Amos.” Dunc continued:

“Did you hear that, Amos? We nearly did it. Let’s go over to my house and study. Next time we’ll be ready for them.”

Amos walked out the front door.

“Wait up, Amos. Don’t you want to get prepared?”

Amos started running.

When Dunc Culpepper and his best friend, Amos Binder, first see the parrot in a pet store, they’re not impressed—it’s smelly, scruffy, and missing half its feathers. They’re only slightly impressed when they learn that the parrot speaks four languages, has outlived ten of its owners, and is probably 150 years old. But when the bird starts mouthing off about buried treasure, Dunc and Amos get pretty excited—let the amateur sleuthing begin!

Dunc and his accident-prone friend Amos are up to their old sleuthing habits once again. This time they’re after a band of doll thieves! When a doll that once belonged to Charles Dickens’s daughter is stolen from an exhibition at the local mall, the two boys put on their detective gear and do some serious snooping. Will a vicious
watchdog keep them from retrieving the valuable missing doll?

Dunc and Amos are researching the Civil War cannon that stands in the town square when they find a note inside telling them about a time portal. Entering it through the dressing room of La Petite, a women’s clothing store, the boys find themselves in downtown Chatham on March 8, 1862—the day before the historic clash between the
Monitor
and the
Merrimac.
But the Confederate soldiers they meet mistake them for Yankee spies. Will they make it back to the future in one piece?

Dunc and Amos meet up with a new buddy named Lash when they enter the radical world of skateboard competition. When somebody “cops”—steals—Lash’s prototype skateboard, the boys are determined to get it back. After all, Lash is about to shoot for a totally rad world’s record! Along the way they learn a major lesson:
Never
kiss a monkey!

Dunc and Amos are planning the best route to get the most candy on Halloween. But their plans change when Amos is slightly bitten by a werewolf. He begins scratching himself and chasing UPS trucks—he’s become a werepuppy!

Dunc and Amos have a small problem when they try hang gliding—they crash in the wilderness. Luckily, Amos has read a book about a boy who survived in the wilderness for fifty-four days. Too bad Amos doesn’t have a hatchet. Things go from bad to worse when a wild man holds the boys captive. Can anything save them now?

Dunc’s not afraid of ghosts, although Amos is sure that the old Rambridge house is haunted by the ghost of Blackbeard the Pirate. Then the best friends meet Eddie, a meek man who claims to be impersonating Blackbeard’s ghost in order to live in the house in peace. But if that’s true, why are flames shooting from his mouth?

Deciphering a code they find in a library book, Amos and Dunc stumble onto a burglary ring. The burglars’ next target is the home of Melissa, the girl of Amos’s dreams (who doesn’t even know that he’s alive). Amos longs to be a hero to Melissa, so nothing will stop him from solving this case—not even a mind-boggling collision with a jock, a chimpanzee, and a toilet.

In order to impress Melissa, Amos decides to perform on the trapeze at the visiting circus. Look out below! But before Dunc can talk him out of his plan, the two stumble across a mystery behind the scenes at the circus. Now Amos is in double trouble. What’s really going on under the big top?

Camouflaged as piles of rotting trash, Dunc and Amos are sneaking around the town dump. Dunc wants to find out who is polluting the garbage at the dump with hazardous and toxic waste. Amos just wants to impress Melissa. Can either of them succeed?

Dunc and Amos are at it again. Some older residents of their town have been bilked by con artists, and the two boys want to look into these crimes. They meet elderly Betsy Dell, whose nasty nephew Frank gives the boys the creeps. Then they notice some soft dirt in Ms. Dell’s shed, and a shovel. Does Frank have something horrible in store for Dunc and Amos?

Dunc and Amos head for camp and face two weeks of fresh air—along with regulations, demerits, KP, and inedible food. But where these two best friends go, trouble follows. They overhear a threat against the camp director, and discover that camp funds have been stolen. Do these crimes have anything to do with the tattoo of the exotic red flower that some of the camp staff have on their arms?

It’s Christmastime, and Dunc, Amos, and Amos’s cousin T. J. hit the mall for some serious shopping. But when the seasonal magic is threatened by some disappearing presents, and
Santa Claus himself is a prime suspect, the boys put their celebration on hold and go undercover in perfect Christmas disguises! Can the sleuthing trio protect Santa’s threatened reputation and catch the impostor before he strikes again?

When Amos wins a “Why I Love My Dog” contest, he and Dunc are off on the Caribbean cruise of their dreams! But there’s something downright fishy about Amos’s suitcase, and before they know it, the two best friends wind up with more high-seas adventure than they bargained for. Can Dunc and Amos figure out who’s out to get them and salvage what’s left of their vacation?

When Dunc and Amos are invited to spend a week in Scotland, Dunc can already hear the bagpipes a-blowin’. But when the boys spend their first night in an ancient castle, it isn’t bagpipes they hear. It’s moans! Dunc hears groaning coming from inside his bedroom walls. Amos notices that the eyes of a painting follow
him across the room! Could the castle really be haunted? Local legend has it that the castle’s former lord wanders the ramparts at night in search of his head! Team up with Dunc and Amos as they go ghostbusting in the Scottish Highlands!

Git along, little dogies! Dunc and Amos are bound for Uncle Woody Culpepper’s Santa Fe cattle ranch for a week of fun. But when they overhear a couple of cowpokes plotting to do Uncle Woody in, the two sleuths are back on the trail of some serious action! Who’s been making off with all the prize cattle? Can Dunc and Amos stop the rustlers in time to save the ranch?

When their fifth-grade class spends a weekend interning at the state capital, Dunc and Amos find themselves face-to-face with Amos’s walking double—Prince Gustav, Crown Prince of Moldavia! His Royal Highness is desperate to uncover a traitor in his ranks. And when he asks Amos to switch places with him, Dunc
holds his breath to see what will happen next. Can Amos pull off the impersonation of a lifetime?