Read An English Boy in New York Online
Authors: T. S. Easton
âKnitMaster 3000. Ben Fletcher,' Craig said solemnly. âYou may begin knitting.'
The KnitMaster hummed into life and began vibrating gently. Before I'd even moved, the first row of its jumper began feeding out of the slot at its front.
I closed my eyes and visualised my Hoopie. I knew it so well this stage wasn't really necessary any more. But I wanted to be in the zone. Sherlock's Mind Palace. The semi-conscious state I needed to achieve in order to perform my superhuman needle speed.
It took a few seconds but then I was there. I began to knit.
I was fast. I was very fast. The wool was good quality. It flowed like liquid gold through my fingers. The needles felt comfortable, I kept the stitches loose, allowing me to complete rows quickly. I knew the KnitMaster's jumper was a far tighter weave, not really suited to such thick wool.
The background hum of the crowd and KnitFair USA faded away to white noise. I lost myself.
After fifteen minutes or so I allowed myself a quick glance up at the machine and was shocked to see how much of the jumper it had completed. I was already well behind. The crowd sat still, apparently engrossed. Watching me lose.
But at around twenty minutes the KnitMaster suddenly beeped harshly and a red light appeared on the console. The cluster of technicians sprang into action like a Formula 1 pit crew. I tried to ignore them and redoubled my efforts. This was my chance to catch up. I couldn't help but take a sideways glance at Kevorkian though. He looked furious. My wool choice had made his machine seem unreliable. I winked at him and carried on.
I was knitting smoothly, trying not to go too fast for fear of making mistakes. There was no point completing the garment quickly only to find it riddled with holes. Even with care, though, I dropped a couple of stitches.
I was dimly aware of the technicians getting the machine going again but I was almost totally immersed in the job. It seemed just an instant later that the buzzer sounded and the floodlights flicked on again. I looked up, dazed, realising this was the half-time break. I would have preferred to just carry on but I didn't have much choice. The crowd stood to stretch their legs, buzzing with excitement. The pit crew surrounded the KnitMaster, tinkering, cleaning out stray strands of wool. Brandi scuttled over to me, Gavin following.
âBen,' she said, the pile of hair on her head backlit by the floodlights and wobbling a little. âYou were amazing.'
âThanks,' I said. âBut the machine's well ahead of me, even with the breakdown.'
âYou gotta keep going,' she said. âDon't give up.'
I peered over her shoulder at Gavin, who stood there watching me back. Seizing his opportunity he leaned forward and stuck out a hand.
âGavin Rogers,' he said, crushing my hand.
âBen Fletcher,' I said.
âI like your design,' he said. âYou're a great knitter.'
âThanks,' I said. He seemed really nice. Not quite the axe murderer I'd expected. Anyone who appreciates the simple beauty of the Hoopie must have his head on straight.
We walked over to a trestle table with drinks and biscuits and Brandi got a Hobnob for me out of her bag. Mum came over to offer her support. Then I noticed Fat Tony standing behind her.
âHello, Tony,' I said.
âHi, Ben,' he said. âCan I have a word?'
âSure,' I said, checking my watch.
We walked off to one side, the bulge man following a few paces behind. The fair was being packed up. The clanking of chairs being stacked was mingled with the popping of corks. It was all nearly over. Just another half an hour then I could go home, beaten, but having done my best.
âBen,' he said. âI know a couple of guys who work here at the Garden.'
âOK,' I said, wondering where this was heading.
He looked around. âGuys who owe me, you know what I mean?'
âI think I can guess,' I said, remembering Keith's story about the man dangling from the window.
âGuys who know where things get plugged in,' he said.
Plugged in? I tried to translate this. Some kind of gangland slang? Tony must have noticed my confusion.
âI mean I know some people who have access to the electricity supply for that machine,' he said slowly. âYou understand what I'm saying?'
âOh,' I said. âOh! You mean you could ask them to turn it off?'
âNow you've got it,' Tony said.
I did get it. I got what he was offering me. The chance to beat the evil Kevorkian. Imagine what would happen if I actually won today. Fame, publicity for the Hoopie. Financial security for me and my family. I'd return to England a hero, having conquered America. In fact, maybe I could stay here. Take that job with Priapia. Take the job with Fat Tony himself! Move my family to Long Island and drink highballs with Leo DiCaprio. Go see a Miley gig with Melanee Chang.
All I had to do was nod.
But what else? I'd be indebted to the Mob. I'd damage KnitCorp. And maybe Priapia. Kevorkian would survive, but think of all the orders that would be cancelled, all the jobs that would be lost. And I'd have to live with the fact that I'd cheated. No. I wouldn't take the paracetamol, I wouldn't use stolen needles, and I wouldn't call in a favour from the Secondi crime family.
I shook my head. âI'm very grateful for the offer, Tony,' I said. âAnd I'm tempted. But I want to play this fair and square.'
âYou sure?'
I nodded.
âYou know what you're turning down here?' he asked.
âI do.'
âCos you're getting your ass handed to you in there, you know?'
âI know.'
Tony nodded. âYou're a good guy, Ben.'
âThanks.'
âAn idiot. But a good guy.'
âWell, thanks again.'
He pointed a fat finger at my chest. âYou got a talent. And you work hard. You're gonna be a success even if you don't win in there today.'
âBen,' Brandi said, rushing up. âIt's time.'
I shook Tony by the hand.
âKill 'em,' he said.
âI'll do my best,' I replied before walking back out onto the stage.
Craig called out my name again as I entered the KnitDome and this time the cheers went to the rafters. The crowd wasn't going to miss the opportunity this time. My spirits surged and the hackles on the back of my neck crackled with electricity. I ignored Kevorkian and the pit crew and sat, picking up my Hoopie and my needles.
I looked up into the stands to check everyone was there. Brandi and Gavin had moved up to sit with my parents, Gex, Keith and Trey. Alanna and Marie, Fat Tony and the bulge man sat in the bottom tier now. Tony gave me the thumbs up. Bulge man yawned, he reached into his jacket, to where the bulge was and pulled out  â¦Â
 â¦Â a Kindle. He began to read.
I smiled. I was ready.
âYou may knit,' said Craig.
And boy, did I knit.
For the next half-hour I wasn't just in the zone, I was the President of the zone. They named the zone after me. I don't know if anyone filmed it, but I just knew I was even faster than I had been at the AUKKC. The needles were a blur, the wool a molten stream. I knew the Hoopie so well, had knitted so many before, I hardly even needed to visualise. Every stitch just sprang into place, as if pre-formed. I felt good, I felt strong, I felt relaxed.
I even found time for the occasional check on the machine. I was interested to see two technicians were hovering about it, picking out clogged-up bits of wool, trying to keep the machine going. Dr Kevorkian stood in the background like an evil overlord.
Like I said, I was fast. But I wasn't fast enough.
The machine disgorged the completed cardigan a good ten minutes before the hour was up. The KnitCorp boffins carried it over to a display table and laid it out triumphantly. I carried on knitting, I only had a few rows to go and I was determined to complete the Hoopie within the hour.
As the seconds ticked down, the crowd had gone quiet. I stood and carried the Hoopie over to the table to a moderate round of applause. I heard Mum give a lone whoop but it was all a bit of an anti-climax. It was a fine Hoopie. Not my best, but it was fine.
Suddenly I felt exhausted. It was over. The adrenalin drained from my system and I was left with the knowledge that I'd lost. That I'd let everyone down. That it was over between me and Megan. That the rise of the knitting machine was unstoppable.
Craig something was cock-a-hoop as he presented the big cheque to smug Kervorkian. I shook the hand of my nemesis but he didn't even look me in the eye.
I felt a little better as I came off stage though and my friends and family gathered around to clap me on the shoulder.
âThey cheated,' Dad said. âThat ref needs a white stick.'
âYou were amazing!' Melanee said, giving me a hug and a kiss which made me blush to my roots. I saw Brandi watching with pursed lips. âThis will be such a boost for the European style.'
âPlease tell me you'll do another interview for
Knitwits!
,' Alanna said. âYou are an inspiration, Ben Fletcher.'
âAnytime you need a job, look me up,' Fat Tony said.
Mum just gave me a squeezy hug and that was best of all.
As we left the KnitDome, I saw a team of technicians stripping the KnitMaster 3000 and pulling out clumps of tangled yarn. They looked thoroughly miserable.
Maybe, in a way, I did win after all.
After leaving Madison Square Garden for the last time, we said goodbye to Alanna, Marie and Keith, who seemed to be getting on quite well with Marie. I watched them walk off down 33
rd
Street, Keith carrying Marie's sample bag while she talked at him animatedly about crocheted owl cushion covers. Some of us went to a restaurant on 32
nd
Street. Gavin knew the owner and we got a private room.
âDo they do Philly cheesesteak here?' I asked him.
âThe best Philly cheesesteak in the country,' Gavin said.
I've noticed everything here has to be the best something in somewhere. âThese are the best highballs in Manhattan. That place does the best cheeseburgers in the Tri-State Area. This is the best loose-meat sandwich on the Atlantic Seaboard.'
âWell,' I replied. âOne more time can't hurt.'
Trey was there, Mum and Dad, Gex of course. Brandi and Gavin. Not Melanee. She'd slipped off straight after the contest with a smile and a wink. Fat Tony and Mr Kindle had also made their exits.
âYou was bricking it in there,' Gex said.
âNo I wasn't,' I replied. âThat was one of the only times in my life when I was feeling completely relaxed.'
âYou looked like you was bricking it,' he said.
âWell, I wasn't!' I snapped. Trust him to ruin the moment.
âOK, OK,' he said. âYou know what?'
âWhat?'
He leaned in closer and whispered so as not to be overheard.
âI was proud. Like that you're my mate.'
Then he looked away and asked Gavin if he was allowed a beer. I was glad he had because at that moment I found I had something in my eye.
Then Brandi was there, giving me a huge hug. I hadn't had much of a chance to talk to her immediately after the DeathMatch.
âI'm so proud of you,' she said. âI can't believe you're going home tomorrow.'
âI'm really going to miss you,' I said.
âYou'll be back,' she said.
âDefinitely,' I replied.
It was time to sit then as the waiter came around for our orders.
âBeer, Ben?' Gavin asked.
âNo thanks. No alcohol for me,' I replied.
âReally? We're celebrating. What about a cocktail? They do good cocktails here.'
I hesitated. âActually,' I looked at the waiter. âI don't suppose you do  â¦Â tea?'
âLong Island iced tea?' the waiter asked.
âNo. A nice cup of tea. English breakfast, ideally?'
He blinked. Then shrugged. âSure, no problem,' he said.
Trey came to sit next to me over dessert. Gex had needed to visit the âcan' as he's taken to calling it. âSo maybe she wasn't into you after all,' Trey said, nodding towards Brandi, who was all over Gavin.
âOf course she wasn't into me,' I said. âShe's gorgeous. Out of my league.'
âWhat about your girlfriend back home,' he said. âAin't she gorgeous?'
âYes, but  â¦Â '
âYeah but what?'
âMegan's not into me either,' I said. I filled him in on the incident with the BlackBerry and Brandi's knickers.
He laughed for a long time.
âI'm glad the end of my relationship is amusing you,' I said.
âIf I were you,' he said, wiping away a tear. âI would stop assuming I know what girls think. They like to keep you guessing.'
I watched Brandi laugh at something Gavin had said. She touched him on the arm. Trey was right. Girls were hard to read. But some were worse than others. Maybe I didn't always know why Megan did what she did, or said what she said. But I had a suspicion that had less to do with her being contradictory and more to do with me being a total idiot. If only I'd realised how lucky I was to have someone like Megan. Now I'd gone and messed it up.
Gex came back from the loo, walking gingerly.
âI need to get back to Hampton, innit?' he said. âThe food here don't agree with me.'
âEat some vegetables!' I said, exasperated.
âNo chance,' he said.
After the meal, we walked slowly back to the hotel. Brandi and Gavin fell into step on either side of me.
âSo what are your plans, Ben?' Gavin asked. âWhat's next?'
I shrugged. âI'll go home. I'll take my AS exams. I'll knit scarves, I'll knit Hoopies.'
âBut what about what Mr D'Angelo said?' Brandi asked. âWhat about your business plan?'
âNo point having a business plan without investment,' I said.