Read Angel in the Parlor Online
Authors: Nancy Willard
O. Strauss leaned against his counter and stared, but Morgon Axel continued unabashed.
“And as for the military! I have two brothers. The oldest is a lieutenant in the Imperial Navy. The other is the captain of the division of the Prussian Guard recently cited by General Ludendorff. I am related by marriage to Colonel von Lettow-Vorbeck and my oldest brother has the ear of Admiral von Holtzendorf.”
O. Strauss touched his ear nervously.
“My father won the
Pour le mérite
in the last war.” And as he spoke, Morgon saw his father dashing through Ypres on a black horse, shouting to the soldiers lounging in the courtyard:
Attack! We are being attacked from the west!
“Why, may I askââ”
“I had the misfortune to lose my right eye in a hunting accident. But my left one is as sound as yours.”
“Well, well,” murmured O. Strauss. “I'll be glad to try you out. We have all sorts of men coming in here. You'll find most of them are hard to please.”
From that lie forward, Morgon Axel acted as O. Strauss's assistant. By day he helped him lay the patterns for cloaks and jackets on long fields of blue wool, and he pinned sleeves and collars on the stocky bodies of officers who made appointments to be fitted. After work he hurried to his room high up in Frau Nolke's house at the other end of town, lugging the shop's manuals on the regulations for military dress which he read far into the night. When he had memorized the fundamentals, he began borrowing uniforms, every night a different rank, so that he could examine how they were made.
In the house next door, the West Bavarian Singing Society met twice a week, and on those evenings Morgon Axel could not study. Rich joyful voices flooded his silence, and he opened his window to hear them.
Ãber's Jahr, über's Jahr, wenn me Traübele schneid't,
Stell' i hier mi wied' rum ein;
Bin i dann, bin i dann dein schätzele noch,
So soll die Hochzeit sein.
He leaned on the sill and looked out. Across the street on the sixth floor of a tottering building, an aged dancing master was teaching young women in bloomers and tights the intricacies of the pirouette and the entrechat. From his window, Morgon Axel could plainly see into theirs. A war is going on, he thought, and people are still dancing as if Germany meant nothing to them.
Sitting down at his table once more, he tried to consider the width of the collar on Captain Hess's uniform but found himself staring vacantly at his own face on the mirror of the wardrobe. It was a warm September night. Under the linden trees, the officers were walking, yes, those officers over whose flesh his fingers had walked miles and miles, gathering pleats and folds on the way. He got up and slipped into the uniform of Captain Hess. Slipped into the sleek trousers and longed-for boots. Buttoned the blue jacket across his chest, fastened the belt, and stood barefoot in front of the mirror. And then stepping out of the bar reserved exclusively for commissioned officers, he leaned on the windowsill and looked up at the figure of a single girl dancing by herself. Perhaps she knew that Morgon Axel was watching. What was the good of military regulations, of drills and marches, if it couldn't protect you against longing to be free? Captain Morgon Axel would send someone to fetch her, but that wasn't the way. The next night, another would take her place.
One evening Morgon noticed the studio was dark; no one ever danced there again, and shortly afterwards the singers, too, disappeared. For the next three years he lived on Frau Nolke's turnips and O. Strauss's chocolates (courtesy of his customers), which the old gentleman hoarded shamefully. A young lieutenant, being fitted for a cloak, told Morgon that he had bought all his Christmas and birthday presents for the next year, though it was only March, so that if he were killed in action, his family and friends would know he hadn't forgotten them. A captain from Bremen, who lisped in honor of the Kaiser and wore a monocle, ordered six pairs of Hessian boots, because, he explained, a soldier should live at all times in his boots. He was modeling his conduct on Frederick the Great who kept his hat and his boots on even when he was ill, rose at four every morning, and in the evening played the flute for recreation. Both the captain and the lieutenant left their photographs for O. Strauss to hang on his wall and both were killed at Soissons.
But one clear night in November, Kaiser Wilhelm fled into Holland. What was to be done? The Imperial Army marched grimly back to Berlin, passing through the Brandenburger Tor. Wreaths crowned their helmets, and they carried a new banner: “Peace and Freedom.” Morgon Axel wept and applied for passage to America, taking with him one fur-lined cape (Army surplus), one suit (much worn), and seven animal masks which his father had willed him; there was nothing else left, and Morgon Axel was the sole heir.
Now look at him, middle-aged, still short and rather stocky, a square figure, in a tweed hunting jacket with absurd shoulder pads, standing in the doorway of his tailor shop on Cherry Street, Germantown, New York.
Wait. You must give an account of the years in between.
The evidence for those years has been lost, except for some brief scenes, undated, by which we may only surmise that he worked as a tailor in New York City and married Ursula Rincetti, daughter of an Italian cabinetmaker and restorer of styles past.
Now Morgon is sitting in the tiny apartment where he lives with his wife and his son, Amyas, aged twelve. Christened Hans Federico but nicknamed Amyas by a young English girl who worked in the Germantown bank auditing accounts and occasionally babysat with Amyas and held him in her arms and sang him to sleep with an old song:
You and I and Amyas
Amyas and you and I.
To the greenwood must we go, alas!
You and I, my life and Amyas.
It is spring. Or summer. Or any season. What you will. Morgon is sitting in front of the television set, watching the “Ed Sullivan Show.” Morgon Axel has the only color television on the block. He is admiring the red sequined suits of the dancing couple, “who have recently played at the Copacabana.” There is a Copacabana in Los Angelesâbut it is another Copacabana which concerns us here, just as it is another Sunset Strip, another Hollywood, another Las Vegas and Broadway that we are speaking of, rather than the ones generally known. Long hours of watching television and films have rebuilt these streets in Morgon Axel's head like a stage setting, deficient in details but peopled with a cast of thousands. Captain Hess and General Ludendorff and Colonel von Lettow-Vorbeck have given way to Roy Rogers and Gene Autrey and Fred Astaire. Sometimes Morgon watches the talent show on the Albany station, “Stairway to the Stars,” and as the young people sing, tap-dance, and play the piano, it is Amyas he imagines, leaping on a trampoline and being discovered.
For Amyas is talented that way, no doubt about it. He has that grace which Morgon so marveled at when he shouldered the weight of Captain Hess's uniform one night in Berlin and saw, in the opposite window, a young girl dancing. Once a week Amyas studies gymnastics and trapeze acrobatics with Taft Toshiho in Yonkers, who also teaches judo to secretaries and housewives. Amyas and the six other boys in his class have already performed in high schools and Kiwanis clubs around the state and at the Ulster County Fair. It's only a matter of months, says Morgon to his friends, till you'll be seeing Amyas on television. On Broadway.
“Tell me about how it was when you worked in the theater,” says Amyas. He is five years old and his father sits on the edge of his bed, waiting for his son to go to sleep.
“Well,” says Morgon Axel, “the shows are not worth mentioning compared to the fêtes. Before the war, such fêtes! I remember one fête I designed for the Count of Ansbach-Schwedt.”
And as he speaks, he sees himself very clearly standing on a balcony in the castle of the count, surveying the garden and the woods beyond, brilliant with thousands of lanterns.
“All the guests came in hunting costumes. I designed over a hundred masks like the faces of animals, no two exactly alike. The women put on the masks and the men had to hunt for their partners in the forest.”
The next morning there is no forest, only the shop, which is small and untidy. The front room contains two mirrors, a few chairs, bolts of wool and gabardine, catalogs and swatches spread open on a table, and a rack of finished garments which barely hides a dressmaker's dummy. In the window Morgon drapes remnants of silk over a truncated plaster column. On the walls hang his masks and his guns. That's the front room, where the tailor receives his customers.
But there's another room behind it, separated from the first by a red curtain. Sybil, the tailor's golden retriever, lopes back and forth between them like a messenger. Customers waiting for their packages can hear the tailor's wife stitching and sighing behind the curtain. Also, the clicking of Sybil's toenails against the bare floor; they have grown long from lack of exercise, for though the tailor dreams of hunting and has his dog and his guns all ready, he seldom finds the time.
Why do you say nothing of Ursula, the tailor's wife?
Searching the tailor's memory, we find that up till now she passed through it as through water, leaving no footprints. A dead civilization which shapes what we are though we will never know what it is.
Nevertheless, give us a picture of the tailor's wife.
Why, when the customers slipped through the curtains for their fittingsâthe tailor had built a tiny dressing room hereâthey saw sitting under the naked bulb that dangled from the ceiling a slender woman with dark hair clouded around her face as if she wanted to hide herself. She was always bending over a piece of work and treading the sewing machine with her heel. In front of her on the pegboard wall, which was no more than a foot from her nose, hung spools of thread in every size and color, and this was her horizon from eight in the morning till six at night.
Behind her the table was heaped with dresses to be mended, zippers to be put in, skirts to be hemmed, trousers with ill-fitting cuffs, and suits cut and basted, which had to be finished. The tailor's wife never looked back for fear she couldn't go on. She had told this to the priest one Sunday when she went to confession, for she was a devout Catholic, though her husband, raised Lutheran, attended no church now.
“Sometimes I think I'll die of despair, Father. I look back and see that the pile never runs out, for just when I think I'm near the end, Morgon heaps on more work. What's the use, I say to myself, of working my way through a pile that's got no bottom? And then my fingers just stop, Father, they won't turn the wheel one more time.”
“Then you mustn't look back, my daughter,” whispers the voice behind the grille. “Reach behind you and pick up one piece at a time. One at a time. Then you'll be able to get through the day. Not to finish the pile; that's not a thing any of us could do in a lifetime. But to get yourself safely across to the next day. God Himself doesn't ask more of you.”
“If only He'd give me a vision to help me through the bad times, Father. Just a small one, so I don't forget what's under the pile.”
An angel dancing on the point of her needle. A wheel within the wheel of her machine.
Having no visions, she settled her love on her son. If he was not an angel, he at least came close to flying like one. When she sewed costumes for Amyas and the six boys in his troupe, the needle leaped for joy like a dolphin in the sea of nylon and satin, and the stitches unwound themselves in love. And all the while Morgon Axel walked up and down in the front room and graciously accepted an order for yellow jodhpurs from William Harris, the fiery-haired riding master of High Stepping Stables outside of town.
“Can I make jodhpurs? My dear Mr. Harris, I can make anything. You should have seen the silver jodhpurs I made for Gene Autrey when I worked in the city. Why, I could make jodhpurs to fit a spider! I remember the first riding outfit I ever madeâit was for the Duke of Augsburg who was giving a ball at his castle in Westphalia.” (A self-indulgent laugh.) “All the guests came in hunting costume. Well, I made the Duke a splendid habit in russet velvet, and when it was done, what do you think? I'd cut the trousers with the nap going up one leg and down the other and when the light struck him he seemed to divide himself like a pair of scissors. But he was very kind about it. âI've invited so many beautiful women,' he said, âthat no one will notice.'”
Mr. Harris pulled off his gloves, a finger at a time, hung his camel's hair overcoat on the rack, and stood stiffly in the middle of the room while the tailor crawled around him on the floor, puffing a little as he took the measurements of the riding master's trim figure.
“Ah, the life I've seen,” sighed Morgon Axel, pulling pins out of the cushion that dangled next to his heart. “When I worked in the city, I had my own place right over the Stork Club. Kitchen, bathroom, shower. I had the whole floor to myself, just for work space. Did I ever tell you about the time I had dinner with Jimmy Durante and an English housewife who was flown over because she'd won something in a soap contest? The company gave me a Lincolnâturn, Mr. Harris.”
Mr. Harris turns and looks straight ahead at the curtain. Behind the tailor's story, he hears the chugging accompaniment of a sewing machine.
“You ought to give your wife a vacation,” he says suddenly. “Every time I come in hereââ”
The tailor hears and does not hear.
“A Lincoln, Mr. Harris. It had a built-in bar where most cars have the back seat. But I'm glad to leave it all behind. Here in the country, I'm happy. I go hunting when I want to, I take off a week here and there when the weather's nice. I'm nobody's slave.”
A sigh floats out from behind the curtain, as from a dark well. The tailor has unwittingly spoken the truth.