Anna (Book 2, The Redemption Series) (19 page)

“
I would love that, Malcolm,” I tell him, feeling like he’s truly opening up to me in a way he probably never has to anyone else, not even Lilly.

“
Since we’re being so truthful with one another,” I tell him. “I have a confession to make.”

“
Confession?” Malcolm asks, looking completely intrigued by my turn of words.

“
I read the letter you wrote to me,” I say, turning my head and nodding towards the nightstand on his side of the bed. “I didn’t know what it was at first, and I almost put it back. Then, when I saw that it was addressed to me, I had to read it. I’m sorry for invading your privacy like that.”

Malcolm tightens his hands around mine
lightly.

“
I’m glad you read it,” he tells me. “I’m glad you know how I felt when I first saw you. And that’s a moment in my life I want to share with you too.”

“
Then take me,” I tell him. “Show me everything.”

Malcolm and I lie down on his bed. I rest my head against his chest and listen to the steady beats of his heart as I pre
pare myself to take a walk through Malcolm’s memories.

Chapter 16

The sun shines brightly in the sky overhead. I have to lift a hand to shade my eyes from its reflective glimmer off the white, sandy earth at our feet. I wasn’t disoriented at all by our location on the dune. In fact, I knew exactly where we were, even though the sand was covered with snow the last time I saw it.

“
This is where we met Levi to make the trade,” I say, looking over at Malcolm.

“
This place, especially this particular spot, is holy to us Watchers,” Malcolm tells me, taking hold of my free hand in our dream world. “It’s where we first came to Earth in the human forms we chose. We all arrived here eager to help humanity progress further in their advancements with our added knowledge. Before we came down, we spent a great deal of time observing human behavior.”

“
Why did you watch them before you came to Earth?”

“
Mostly, we wanted to learn which disciplines needed the most help in order to push humanity further along in its evolution,” Malcolm tells me. “All of us had our own specialties. Mine was architecture. I wanted to start this journey with you here because this is where my Earthly life began, and I felt like you should see the moment of our arrival.”

Malcolm looks out onto the vast expanse of desert
in front of us, and I follow his gaze and watch as the first moment of his life on Earth unfolds.

As one, a group of Watchers appear before us. They’re
all dressed in black feather cloaks, black leather pants and matching boots with silver buckles on the sides. As I scan their faces, I notice a trend among the Watchers. They’re all handsome and seem to exude a certain self-confidence that makes them even more attractive. Malcolm from the past is standing in the front row of the group and, to my eyes at least, stands out from the crowd.

“
I love the outfits,” I tell him, ogling Malcolm’s memory of himself with an appreciative eye. “Do you still have yours?”

“
Yes,” Malcolm says, looking over at me with a smile on his handsome face. “Why do you ask?”

“
Because I definitely want you to wear it for me one day,” I say.

Malcolm chuckles.

“Your wish is my command,” he tells me.

“
How many of you were there in the beginning?”

“
Two-hundred of us came to Earth.”

Suddenly one of the Watchers phases in beside
us. I recognize him as Mason, Jess’ husband and leader of the Watchers before Malcolm was given the responsibility.

“
Brothers,” Mason says to the crowd of angels in front of him. “Today is the day we have all been preparing for. We’ve been sent here by our father to help the humans progress further than they have so far, but remember, we are only meant to help them in their technological and cultural advancements. Be an inspiration to them, but don’t try to take them forward before they’re ready. We are their guides to the wonders our father has in store for them, and that is all we are meant to be. Now, go to the places you have chosen to spend your time and may God bless the work you are about to do.”

As quickly as they came, the Watchers vanish.

“Where did you choose to go?” I ask Malcolm.

The scene
ry changes and I find us standing on a small, grassy knoll now instead of the dune. I notice a group of twenty men tugging on thick ropes wrapped around a large rectangular slab of stone. They grunt as they use their combined strength to pull the stone up the small hill towards a deep hole dug into the summit. I see Malcolm and some other men urging the laborers on to keep pulling the stone up towards the hole.

“
This is where I decided to come,” Malcolm tells me. “This part of the world would later be known as the north-western region of France. The humans were entering the Neolithic period and beginning to use large stones to build various structures.”

“
What are you building here?” I ask.

“
It’s a dolmen. Basically, it’s a burial chamber made of free standing stones and covered with a capstone. But, that’s not why I brought you here,” Malcolm says, pointing to something in front of us.

I look to see what he’s pointing at and find that it isn’t a
thing at all but a woman.

She is petite in stature with beautiful long blonde hair
which reaches down to her waist. Her skin is pale with just a hint of pink. Her face is beautiful with its delicate bone structure, but it’s her eyes which draw me completely in. They’re an amazing cornflower blue, and I can honestly say I’ve never seen eyes like hers before in my life. Just by watching her facial expressions and the way she carries herself, I can tell she has a sweet temper and probably never even thought to raise her voice to anyone in her life.

“
Who is she?” I ask, staring at the woman as she lugs a wooden bucket full of water up the hill beside the men.

“
Her name was Mina, and she was my first wife.”

I watch Malcolm’s memory and notice the past him
openly staring at Mina, not seeming to care if anyone else takes notice of his diverted attention. By the small stretch of Mina’s pink lips, it’s obvious she knows he’s watching her and enjoys being able to hold his interest.

“
What made you fall in love with her?” I ask, noting what a stark contrast Malcolm’s first wife is to me. It wasn’t just the physical disparities that made us distinctive from one another either. Mina’s demeanor gave the impression that she had a sweet and calm personality. How could Malcolm love someone as brash and temperamental as me when he chose a woman like her to be his first wife?

“
Mina emanated a natural serenity around her that almost everyone she came into contact with felt,” Malcolm reminisces, his voice taking on a far off quality as he answers my question. “The war with Lucifer and his followers in Heaven was hard on all of us who had to fight in it. It took a lot of time for some of us to recover and even longer for others to come to terms with what happened. For me, Mina was like a healing balm on my soul. She was so caring and nurturing to not only me but also to all those around her. I was immediately drawn to her and her to me. At the time, I didn’t care that God ordered us to refrain from becoming emotionally and physically involved with humans. All I could think about was the way Mina made me feel, and I didn’t see why it would be wrong to love her as long as she felt the same way about me. So, I asked her to marry me, and we were wed the next day.”

Malcolm’s memory
changes location to the interior of a small one room cottage. I see Malcolm sitting naked on the side of a small bed crying like he had lost all hope. Mina is lying underneath the covers of the bed and simply looks like she’s in a deep sleep.

“
That next morning after the wedding, I couldn’t wake her up. I knew something was wrong, but I didn’t know exactly what was happening at the time. I had a feeling then that my father was punishing me for going against his orders. It wasn’t until the hunger for blood hit that I understood the full strength of his wrath. My father has never been one to take disobedience lightly, and his punishment for us was fitting to our crime. Those of us who married were rewarded with the death of our wives by the birth of children cursed because of our sin.”

Time rapidly passes within the little cottage, and I watch as Mina’s body withers away but not from decay. It’s almost like something is slowly eating her from the inside out and only leaving behind an empty husk of skin and bones.

The memories finally stop and I stand to see past Malcolm holding a small bloody creature in his arms. What’s left of Mina is still lying on the bed, but her belly looks like it exploded from the inside out.

“
Our children took what nutrients they needed from the body of their mothers and then clawed their way out of the wombs once they were ready to be born,” Malcolm tells me in a detached voice. “The instant my son was born I knew I couldn’t live among humans anymore and still take care of him. So, I phased us to a remote cave in the Himalayan Mountains.”

Our surroundings change to a cave where a single fire is burning
at its center. There are a few furnishings around such as a cot and a table, but little else is present to provide for a comfortable life. A small wooden cradle is set beside the cot, and I see past Malcolm reach into it and pull out what appears to be a healthy looking baby.

“
I was relieved when the sun rose and the thing that clawed its way out of Mina transformed itself into something that looked human,” Malcolm tells me. “But every night I had to endure his cries when he transformed back into the creature I had doomed him to become. Every time I had to watch Sebastian suffer through the change, my rage towards my father grew just as my hunger for human blood did. I hated Him for a long time. And, I finally decided I’d had enough. If He wanted me to become a monster, so be it.”

We’re soon standing in what looks like an Egyptian bazaar
from a time in Earth’s history I’ve only read about. Vendors are vigorously hawking their merchandise to passersby, desperately trying to make a sale. I see past Malcolm leaning up against a wall near a stall where colorful fabrics are being sold. He’s shirtless and only wearing a white cloth skirt around his hips with a blue and gold silk sash tied around his waist. His skin looks paler than those of the people milling around the bazaar, causing him to stand out to my eyes. The expression on his face is a mask of complete control as he watches a group of women browsing the fabrics of the nearby merchant. If it wasn’t for the predatory glint in his eyes, I would have thought he was completely bored with the goings on around him.

“
I attempted to live among humans without eating them,” Malcolm tells me. “I initially came here to just help build the pyramids at Giza, but the longer I stayed around humans the more intense my hunger for their blood became. It finally got to a point where I didn’t care about my soul anymore. All I wanted to do was hurt my father for what He had turned me into and for the curse he placed on Sebastian for a sin I had committed.”

I watch as
past Malcolm pushes away from the wall he was leaning against and approaches one of the women he’s been watching. It doesn’t take him long before he has her separated from her friends and walking away with him willingly.

In an instant, we’re standing
on top of a pyramid. Past Malcolm is holding the woman against him with his face buried in the side of her neck. The woman is completely limp in his arms, and I hear a rhythmic sucking sound as Malcolm drinks her blood.

“
This was the first time I fed on a human,” Malcolm tells me, his voice filled with disgust as he watches himself become a monster he would later come to hate.

“
Why are you showing me this?” I ask, averting my eyes away from past Malcolm to the man I love standing beside me.

Malcolm tears his eyes away from his memory
self and looks down at me. The pain of watching himself murder a helpless woman is written clearly on his face. I squeeze the hand I hold tighter trying to reassure him that he isn’t that man anymore.

“
You don’t have to relive these moments,” I tell him. “You don’t have to show me this.”

“
Yes,” Malcolm says with a small nod of his head, “I do. I need you to understand who I was because that person is still inside me, Anna. He’ll never completely go away, but I’ve learned how to forgive him for what he did. I can’t erase the pain I caused others, but I can strive to be a better man and continue to rise above who I was so that part of me is only a distant memory.”

I glance back at past Malcolm.

“What did it feel like to kill her?” I ask.

Malcolm sighs heavily.
“Her blood tasted like the sweetest nectar. It made me feel invincible and fed the monster growing inside me, making him think he could kill at will and not have to pay a price for it later on. I went on a killing spree after this moment that didn’t stop for many years.”

“
And where was Sebastian during this murderous rampage of yours?”

“
I kept him safe,” Malcolm says. “It was my only redeemable quality during that dark period of my life. I made sure he never killed anyone because I didn’t want his soul to be damned because of me. I had already ruined his life enough. I wasn’t about to be the reason his afterlife was doomed as well.”

Malcolm takes me to a moment in his past that I’ve already seen. It’s the night he first
met Lilly.

“
Why are we here?” I ask him as I watch past Malcolm study Lilly as she crosses the street in front of him. “I’ve already seen this.”

“
I want to show you the memories that changed who I was,” Malcolm tells me. “This is a moment that changed my life forever.”

“
Yes,” I say, “I know. I felt what it did to you the last time I saw it.”

“
I didn’t know it then,” Malcolm tells me as he watches his past self take hold of Lilly’s arm, “but I would come to realize this was the moment my real life on Earth began. If it hadn’t been for Lilly, I never would have been able to experience the happiest years of my life.”