Anywhere With You (26 page)

I rush through my shower because I want to be finished when Allison gets back from her walk. I make my way back to the living room, to find Judy still sitting there by herself. I kneel down in front of her. “You okay? Can I get you anything?” I ask her.

“No, thank you. I’m going to head home as soon as Allison returns,” she says solemnly.

I hear the front door open I turn to see Allison, Hailey and Mrs. Emerson returning from their walk. Allison walks straight towards me, so I open my arms for her. I kiss the top of her head but don’t say anything. I know that nothing I say can take her pain away.

“Thanks for being here, Judy, and taking care of everything,” Allison says, her voice cracking.

“Oh sweetie, you’re welcome. I am going to head home now, but I’ll be back to check in on you tomorrow. I left some paperwork there on the table, letters, copies of her will, that kind of thing.” Judy stands to leave. “You call me if you need anything, sweet girl. We will get through this.”

Allison turns and buries her face in my chest and wraps her arms around my waist and squeezes. I hold her tight hoping that I am relaying to her that I am here for whatever she needs. We stand like that for I don’t know how long, when finally she asks me to sit down with her. We make our way to the couch. She pushes me down and sits on my lap curling up against me. I gently stroke her back. I point to the table. “There is the stack of papers that Judy left you. Do you need me to sort through them for you?” I volunteer. Before she can answer Hailey walks in to tell us that everything is set up for dinner.

“Let’s get you something to eat,” I suggest.

“I’m not really hungry.”

“I know, babe, but you need to keep up your strength up. You have a tough couple of days ahead of you. Can you just try to eat a little, please?”

She nods. Hailey is apparently listening because she suddenly appears with two plates loaded down. Aiden follows with drinks. Allison starts to get up. “You can stay right where you are baby, you don’t need to move.” She releases a deep breath.

“Thank you, Liam,” she speaks softly. “I love you,” her voice breaks with emotion on the last words and I’ll be damned but do I tear up again.

“I love you so much, Allie. We will get through this.” I kiss her cheek and we both pick at our food, neither with an appetite. I increase my effort just so that I can try to convince her to do the same.

We finish picking at our plates when Aiden’s parents came in to tell us goodbye. They offer for all four of us to sleep at their place tonight. Allison thanks them but says that she wants to stay here tonight. I am going to be where she was, no matter where that happens to be.

Aiden and Hailey stick around until about eleven. They both offering to stay the night and Aiden offers his house again, Allison declines. I didn’t bother to respond, they both knew that I am with her no matter where she chooses to sleep.

Aiden and Hailey leave to go to Aiden’s for the night which leaves Liam and I all alone at Gran’s. I suddenly realize that maybe Liam doesn’t want to stay here. “Liam, you can stay at Aiden’s if you would rather.”

“Nope, wherever you are, that’s where I want to be,” he says as he kisses my forehead.

“Thank you.” I take a deep breath. “I guess I need to look through the paperwork that Judy left,” I say pointing to the stack on the table.

“We don’t have to do that tonight, babe. We can just leave it all for tomorrow and try to get some rest tonight.”

“I don’t think I could sleep now even if I wanted to. Will you go through it with me?” I ask him. I know that I am leaning on him for pretty much everything, but he calms me.

“Anything you need,” he tells me. He is being so amazing through all of this. I sit down on the floor between Liam’s legs and begin sifting through the stack of papers. There is a copy of Gran’s will which outlines that she has already planned and paid for her funeral, should the time come. She is to be buried in the same cemetery as my parents and grandpa. The house and all of her remaining assets are left to me. The house is paid for so there is no mortgage to worry about.

“This gives you time to sift through her belongings and decide what you want to do with the house and everything else without the pressure of a mortgage.” Liam is trying his hardest to help me stay sane. I love him!

The stack also contains the deed to the house as well as all her banking information that she had already listed me on so there would be no issues with having it tied up in probate court. There is an addendum in the will explaining where I can find documents such as my parent’s marriage license, birth certificates, etc. Gran had apparently kept all of it when we sold the house after they died, just in case I would want it someday. Tears prick my eyes, I miss her so much already and it hasn’t even been a day.

Liam is gently massaging my shoulders while I work my way through the stack of documents. Occasionally, he will lean down and kiss the top of my head. I don’t even want to think about how this day would have been without him here. I suddenly realize that I forgot to congratulate him on his win today. I look over my shoulder at him. “Congrats on your win, I’m sorry I forgot to tell you.”

“Hey,” he says moving all my hair from one shoulder to the other. “You have nothing to be sorry for.” He leans down and kisses my cheek. I smile weakly and turn back to the task of sifting through the mound of paperwork. Really, it wasn’t a mound, just a small stack but the heaviness that it is bringing to my heart makes it look like a damn mountain.

I have finally worked my way to the bottom of the stack to find an envelope with my name written on it. I suck in a breath and feel the tears start to slide down my cheeks. Liam puts his hands under my arms and lifts me onto his lap and engulfs me in a hug. A hug so loving and full of emotion, one that only Liam can give. “You don’t have to read that now.”

Logically I know that he’s right, I can put it aside and call it a night. However, my heart is telling me that those are her final words, final words to me and even though I know that it’s going to shatter my heart I want to read it. I want to know what she felt was important enough to transcribe into words knowing that she was leaving me.

Liam is rubbing soothing circles on my back. I sit up to face him. “I need to know.” I slide the envelope open and pull out the letter. I rest my head against his chest, preparing myself for the onslaught of emotion that is sure to consume me because of the piece of paper in my hand.

Allie Girl-

Since you are reading this, you already know that I took care of all of the funeral arrangements and you should have received all important documents or at least know where to find them. Everything is yours now, Allie. I don’t want you to feel obligated to keep the house. I want you to do what is best for you. Home is where your heart is.

I need you to know how much I love you. You have brought so much joy to my life. I am so proud of the young woman that you have become and I know that your parents would be proud of you as well. It saddens me to know that I will not be here to see you get married or become a mom. I will be watching over you and know that I will be with you every day in spirit. Each time life throws you something new, good and bad, I will be there.

You have found yourself a fine young man to spend your life with. Let him Love you, Allie. Paint your canvas full of vibrant colors and enjoy the laughter and love that life brings you. I have your past but Liam has your future. Don’t be afraid to give your whole heart. Live and love fearless.

I will always be with you. I love you, Allie Girl.

Gran

I let the letter fall to my lap as my body heaves with sobs. Liam holds me tighter. He doesn’t speak but then again he doesn’t have to. He knows that I just need to process these emotions racing through me. We sit like this for what feels like hours. Finally I reach for the letter and hand it to him, so that he can read it himself. He shakes his head slightly. “I read it over your shoulder, baby.” Kissing the top of my head. “I do, you know.” I look up at him in question. “I love you like a fat kid loves cake.” I chuckle, I can’t help it. He is obviously trying to lighten the mood and it works. He always seems to know what I need.

I stand up pulling him with me, leading him down the hallway to my bedroom. Exhaustion is taking over and all I want to do was fall asleep in his arms. After changing for bed, brushing my teeth and washing my tear stained face I crawl into my bed beside Liam. Of course, he again does not disappoint as he draws my back against his chest and secures his arms around me. I faintly remember him telling me he loves me as the exhaustion seizes me.

The next few days are nothing but a blur. Since Gran had everything planned and paid for, all we had to do was wait for the minister to be available. Since Gran and I had no other family. I settle for a small graveside service. Liam’s parents are here with Hailey as well as Aiden and his parents. Judy and her husband are here, as well as a few ladies from her church. That’s it, small and simple. We lay Gran to rest with Judy singing Amazing Grace.

The weeks following the funeral are tough for Allison. My beautiful girl is heartbroken. We all rally around her, giving her support the best that we know how. It is almost as if she is just going through the motions to get through each day. Hailey suggests that since spring break is coming up we should try to schedule our Gatlinburg vacation. We all agree that the trip might do Allison some good. Aiden and I are also excited because it’s right before the draft and we are both nervous as hell. Add in school wrapping up and worrying about Allison … we are all pretty stressed.

Allison agrees to the trip, just like we knew that she would. Hailey calls and gets everything scheduled for the weekend leading into spring break. I am nervous yet excited to get away. I want my happy full of life Allison back. I don’t know what to do for her. I know that she needs to grieve, but she also needs to live. I have found her reading the letter that her Gran left here several times. The sheet is starting to wear at the creases; she has read it so much.

The trip to Gatlinburg is nice, the weather is good and the company is even better. Hailey sits in the back with Allison and gets her singing along with the radio. I actually catch a real smile in the rear view mirror and I make a mental note to do something really nice for my little sister. The cabin we are staying in is beautiful. It’s a three bedroom, with a pool, hot tub, and game room. My parents have really out done themselves.

The first night we decide to go into town and have dinner at the Hard Rock Café. After dinner we are walking downtown checking out the shops when we come upon a tattoo parlor. Our freshman year of college Aiden and I got wasted and ended up getting matching tribal tattoos on our biceps. I’ve been thinking about adding to mine and so has Aiden. We walk into the parlor and speak to the guy at the desk. He immediately starts working on the designs that we have in mind. I feel Allison walk up beside me. “What do you think, beautiful, you like it?”

She smiles widely shaking her head yes. “I want one too.”

This is the first I have ever heard Allison mention that she is interested in getting ink. I throw my arm over her shoulder and tuck her close to my side. “What are thinking of getting?”

“Well, I actually I was thinking of getting script on the side of my foot.”

“I’m digging it. What saying?”

“Live and Love Fearless,” she replies softly.

I kiss the top of her head. “It’s perfect.” I have seen her read the letter from Gran enough times, to know that those are the words written in her letter. I can only hope that this will help her heal. What started out as Aiden and I adding to our current tribal tats, turns into all four of us getting ink. Allison gets her script on the side of her foot and it looks sexy as hell. Of course, anything on Allison is sexy as hell. Hailey ends up getting a fancy H on the top of her foot. Aiden and I both add the first letter or our last names to ours.