Ardor (4 page)

"Yes, you do.” I growled, losing my patience.  “Every day, for the past few months, I've had to endure your sexual harassment. It’s always, 'Is there anything I can do, Sir'—" 

"That’s me trying to be respectful of your position as my superior!" Jasmine yelled.

"Bullshit. You're just like them, like
her
," I spat.  Oh, I was drunk. Shit-faced at that point. It was obvious as hell even to me. 

I still didn’t stop.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you drinking?"

"That’s none of your business, and it’s entirely your fault that I have to resort to alcohol so I don't run to where you are and make you mine."

She let out a small gasp and my hand clenched around the phone. The plastic cracked.

"Why do you torture me? Why make me feel all this?"

"What do you feel, Greg? Please tell me what you need . . . what you want."

"You.”
I was a defeated man. “Jasmine, I need you."

"I’m—" 

I had a good feeling what she was about to say, and if I let her, my resolve would crumble so I cut her off. "But I can't have you. You'll end me, finish what Cassandra started. She cheated on me, embarrassed me, and left. If I couldn't keep her, how can I keep you?"

"Because I’m not her."

"And that scares me more than anything." 

"I can't leave you, Greg. I can't because . . ."

"I need you to leave me alone, Jasmine. Please let me go . . .” My eyes were heavy as I spoke, exhaustion taking all the fight I had right out of me.

"Oh, sweetie what has she done to you? I won't hurt you, Greg, and if this is what you need," she sniffed, "then I'll move on and let you be, without me."

Those were the last words I heard before the phone slipped from my fingers. I was done. The only decent ending this fucked-up day could have was my head hitting the pillow. My body felt heavy as I stumbled through my home and into my room.  It was spinning as I managed to kick my shoes off and flop into bed.

I’m going to be in so much pain,
was the last thought I had before
everything went black.

Chapter 5

Two weeks later…

“God, I’m happy it’s Friday,” I heard Jasmine say when she entered the employee’s lounge with Lita. 

“You seem more excited than usual . . . what gives? Big date?” Lita asked, and I stopped dead in my tracks. 

This can’t be happening
, I thought.

“Actually, I do.” Jasmine’s voice held a defensive edge to it. Her posture was stiff, shoulders squared, and eyes full of hurt. Jasmine reminded me of a coiled snake — a bit scared, but ready to defend herself from all coming attacks.

Seeing her like that was a punch to my gut. Standing behind a tower of empty crates, I hid and listened to her prattle on about her plans. 

“With who?” Lita asked with a gentle tone, and I wondered if she’d noticed Jasmine’s defensive behavior, too.

“Thank you, Lita,” I murmured under my breath, so quiet that no one could hear. 

“I thought you were all about a certain older gentleman—”

“Would you stop?” Jasmine sighed. She sounded both bitter and defeated. “He could be somewhere around here this very minute and hear you.
Besides, after how he’s been acting? No. I can’t deal with him anymore.”

Don’t say that, please.

Isn’t this what I want, though?

Faced with it, I had to admit that I might have been a hypocrite when it came to asking her that. A huge one.

It was Lita’s turn to interrupt. “Woman, please. I would be doing you a favor. Besides I’ve heard more than enough to know that you dream about his piercing blues, dark curls, and that face that you claim makes you . . .” 

I could not believe that the serious Lita I’d known all these years was in the employee’s

lounge
, faking masturbation before my eyes. 

“Enough, Lita, I can’t keep hoping for him to see me…to feel for me, what I do for him.”

“So that’s it? You’re just giving up after a small bump in the road?” 

“You weren’t the one on the phone that night…you didn’t have to hear him curse you for existing and say that you were breaking what that bitch had left behind.”

What the hell is she talking about? 

“Oh, sweetie.
He’s the man of your dreams, Jasmine. A love like that won’t disappear overnight. He feels for you too…give him some time and it’ll all work out.”

“I don’t know, Lita. Plus there is a cutie waiting to have dinner with me tonight . . .

maybe this is exactly what I need to move on.”

The fuck you do!

“What are you going to do when Greg loses it after he finds out about this? Do you think that sexy beast, as you call him, is going to be happy about this?”

“Don’t forget his over six foot, toned body,” Jasmine said with a whimper, and my cock hardened at the sound.

“Okay, first of all, put away the porn sounds, and second, how could I forget if you’re constantly sighing over that body when no one is looking?”

“I’m in love with that man, Lita. I’ve been holding out for him all these months hoping that whatever it is he feels for me can became more, but after what happened that night…it’s not going anywhere, Lita. It’s time that I admit that to myself.”

From my vantage point there was just enough visibility for me to witness Jasmine scoff, and then her face scrunched up in pain.

“Trust me, sweet pea, Mr. T. sees you. He wants you just as bad. We’ve all noticed the way his eyes linger on you. The way his entire mood brightens when you enter the room.”

Was I that transparent? Wait a minute. Did this mean that my sweet Jasmine masturbated to thoughts of me?
She loves me?
My brain began catching up with their conversation, throwing me into a spiral of confusion and hope.

“Please stop, I don’t need to hear this. Don’t need to raise false hopes, plus my date is tonight, and I’ll be damned if I let something that will never be, ruin my chance of getting to know someone new.”

“Fine, I’ll let it be, but mark my words. You, my dear, young, friend, will never be happy with anyone else. That heart of yours belongs to Greg, and no other guy will make you forget how you feel about him.”

“I have to try, Lita.”

Over my dead fucking body
. I needed to stop that date from happening. Leaving my secluded spot, I waltzed around the crates and marched over to where the ladies stood.

Lita watched me with calculating eyes and Jasmine looked as though she’d seen a ghost.

“Afternoon, ladies.” 

“Afternoon, Greg,” Lita said replied with a knowing grin. “Did you need anything?”

“Jasmine!” I blurted out. “I mean,” I paused to clear my throat, “I need to speak with

Jasmine.”

“Of course you do,” Lita mumbled, and then elbowed a stoic Jasmine before walking away.

Poor girl still looked frightened. She probably feared that I had heard her declarations of love, but it wasn’t the right time to discuss our feelings. What needed our immediate attention was her canceling that fucking date!

“Miss Velez, I’m so sorry to do this to you,” I began once we were settled in my office,

“But Thelma got a last minute order for tomorrow and she’s going to need help.” I knew the protest was about to emerge from her plump lips so I had to make her feel empathetic of Thelma’s plight. “I know that this isn’t your area,  that you are not a baker, but you have helped her in the past and what she needs is help with prepping . . . easy work.”

She crossed her arms; her eyes were blazing even though her facial expression was flat.

“Where are you going with this, Mr. T?” 

“I need you to stay and work a double tonight.”

Her eye twitched right before her lids closed. I saw her inhale deeply,
then her eyes opened and focused on the spot behind me. “I– I can’t. I have plans tonight.”

“I really need you, Jasmine.”
Please don’t go. I know I’ve been a dick and deserve nothing more than for you to move on, but I’m a selfish man and I can’t let you go.
“I’ll make it up to you. How does next weekend off sound as consolation?”

“Tempting, Mr. T, but me canceling on such short notice isn’t fair to my date if I take you up on it.”

As if I cared about the asshole’s feelings. “I’ll buy you dinner. Does sushi sound good?”

“You’re making it hard to say no.” 

Come on, woman, give in
, I begged in silence, and then upped the offer. “From your

favorite
place.” 

Her eyes widened, and I could have slapped myself for blurting that out.

“How would you know what my favorite place is?” Jasmine stood, placed her hands on my desk, and leaned forward.