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Authors: Jr. L. E. Modesitt

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BOOK: Arms-Commander
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XCIII

Saryn woke up lying on a wide bed. Her head felt as though unseen hammers were beating on both sides of it, and she could barely see through the lightknives stabbing through her eyes. She thought it was light outside, but was it still fourday? After several moments, she could make out that Hryessa stood on one side of the bed, with Zeldyan on the other.

“Commander?” asked Hryessa.

“I'm here.” Saryn moved her fingers, her toes, and turned her head slightly. That made the unseen hammers beat harder. Finally, she sat up, if slowly, swinging her boots over the side of the bed. Her heels barely touched the heavy bedside carpet.

Hryessa extended a goblet. “It's ale.”

Probably better than water here at the moment.
Saryn took the crystal goblet with both hands and slowly sipped until she finished half the ale. The pounding subsided slightly. The lightknives did not. She handed the goblet back to Hryessa.

“I owe you once more,” said Zeldyan quietly.

“No…you don't,” replied Saryn. “They wouldn't have attacked you if I hadn't come to Lornth.”

“If you had not come to Lornth, the same things would have happened, and I also would be dead. Like my son and my father.”

“You are kind, Lady.” Saryn was too tired to argue. “How long was I out?”

“Out?” asked Hryessa. “Oh…it is about a glass before sunset.”

“The same day? Fourday?”

“Of course.”

“Two, maybe three glasses,” Saryn murmured. “How is Dealdron?”

“He is in much pain, but he says nothing. He is in a small guest chamber. We did not touch his chest.”

Saryn stood, if slowly and deliberately, waiting to see if she felt dizzy. She did not. “I need to see him.”

“Commander…”

“He saved my life. I will see him.” Saryn walked slowly to the chamber doorway and into the corridor—where two guards stood, hands on the hilts of their blades.

“To the left, ser,” instructed Hryessa.

Saryn kept walking until she reached another door with two guards also stationed outside. She looked to Hryessa.

“We did not wish any of the dead Lornians' friends to disturb him.” The captain paused. “I will wait here. He should see you both. It will ease his mind.”

Saryn opened the door and stepped inside. Zeldyan followed.

Dealdron lay on a bed narrower than the one on which Saryn had awakened but almost twice the width of a guard's bunk. His left arm had been splinted, but his chest had not been bound. Saryn was glad for that, although she knew he would need some sort of brace before he could safely move, but she wanted to be there when he had his chest bound. His forehead was beaded with sweat. His eyes were open, but fixed overhead, almost unseeing.

Saryn stepped forward until she was standing beside the bed. Zeldyan moved up closer as well, to Saryn's right.

“Dealdron,” Saryn said softly, “I'm here. Thank you.” What else could she say?

He blinked, then winced before speaking, slowly, as if each word were an effort. “I…overheard…knew they were up to something…told Klarisa to be ready…didn't know for what…should have known…done more…tried…”

Even without trying, Saryn could sense the pain, but she had to
know
if she had done enough. Oh-so-carefully she extended the tiniest order-thread across his chest.

“…feels better…”

The worst of the chaos was gone, and his heart felt normal. As she began to feel dizzy, she released the probe, then laid a hand on his forehead. “You'll be all right. Just try to sleep.”

“Are you…?”

“I'm fine, now, thanks to you.” She reached down and squeezed his good hand, gently.

“You are…my angel…Commander…” Dealdron closed his eyes, as if the words had taken every last bit of energy.

“Just rest…I'll be back to see you later.” Saryn lifted her hand, turned, and walked slowly from the chamber.

You are my angel…my angel.
His words rang in her ears…and in her thoughts.

“You care for him, do you not?” murmured Zeldyan.

“He's never asked anything of me, except to please me. And he was willing to give his own life to save mine.”

“Would that there were more men like him.” Zeldyan paused. “Why is he so devoted to you?”

“I saved his life and challenged him to do his best at what he could.” What else could she say? And what was she going to do? For one thing, as soon as she'd recovered, she was going to make sure Dealdron healed—fully.

Then, she froze in place for a moment, recalling what Istril had said seasons before about understanding the price a woman might have to pay for any man who truly worshipped her.
Can I pay that price? Should I?

She'd just have to see…as with everything else…But…somehow…she would.

XCIV

Three days passed before the pounding in Saryn's head fully subsided and another before she could see normally. Part of that was because after two days, she'd used more order to help when the healer had bound and braced Dealdron's chest.

Just before midmorning on oneday, she walked down the wide corridor toward the small study, where she was to meet Maeldyn. The stern-faced lord-holder had quietly requested a private meeting, one that Saryn wasn't sure she was anticipating with any pleasure, much as she trusted Maeldyn.

The Lord of Quaryn stood by the door to the study, waiting for Saryn. “Good morning, Commander.” Maeldyn bowed, then gestured toward the open door. “Shall we?”

“Thank you.”

Maeldyn followed her inside, then closed the door and seated himself across the square table from Saryn.

“You had some concerns,” offered Saryn.

“Two eightdays from now, we are to meet in Lornth to discuss what to do about an overlord and the succession of various other lord-holders,” began Maeldyn.

Saryn nodded. “That was what we agreed upon.”

“Lord Henstrenn is dead, and so are Mortryd, Orsynn, Rherhn, Keistyn, Kelthyn, and Jaffrayt. And, of course, Lord Deolyn and Lord Gethen. Some of them, such as Henstrenn, Kelthyn, and Orsynn, do not even have male heirs, and there is no lord-holder of Rohrn. In fact, Kelthyn has no possible heirs whatsoever. What exactly, Angel Commander, do you intend?” Maeldyn looked almost guilelessly at Saryn.

“I was thinking of you, as a matter of fact.” Saryn was, but only to bring up his name and to determine her course from his reaction.

Maeldyn shook his head, if ruefully. “I am as vain as the next man, but I am not fool enough to think I would ever have the power to rule Lornth. Of equal import is that, while I love my son dearly, he would make a poor overlord. There is also the fact that I do not have the coins expected for such a position. Do not mention Spalkyn, for his son…”

“I know,” Saryn said quickly. “You are a man of judgment. Whom would you have as overlord?”

“You must realize, Angel, that any lord-holder of Lornth you name will be hated and thought a puppet of Westwind. That would also be true of anyone you found acceptable, even if you did not name such a person. Anyone you would not name or could not support would be an even worse Overlord of Lornth than those who have come before.”

“You're saying that I can name no one? Am I supposed to turn Lornth over to the Suthyans or the Jeranyi?”

“I would not wish that on the worst of lord-holders…nor did I suggest it. You already act as much as an overlord.”

“That would not set well with many.”
Almost none, from what I've seen so far.
“Also, I don't even have a consort, much less any children.”

“You still are young enough to have children, are you not?”

He's serious, deadly serious.
“I could have children, if I so desired, but why me?”

“Because the only one who can heal Lornth is someone powerful enough that no lord would even think of rebelling, and you are the only one in the land who is that strong.”

“You're saying that only a tyrant can hold it together.”

“Can you think of anyone else? Even the Suthyans would hesitate to strike, knowing that Westwind would aid you. Was it accidental that you just happened to be in a position to halt and destroy the last Suthyan white wizard? Or that you did not even entertain surrender in dealing with most of the lord-holders?”

“I offered terms to a number of the lord-holders.”
Not all, but a number.
“They refused to consider them.”

“And the Suthyans? Would you have granted them terms had they asked?”

“No,” Saryn admitted. “I did not want any of them to return to Suthya.”

“Why might that be?”

“So that the Suthyan Council would think twice about sending mages or wizards against either Westwind or Lornth…and so that they would have fewer to send if they so decided.”

“You see?” Maeldyn smiled. “You already think as an overlord should. In time, if it is not true already, you will be stronger than your Marshal.” He paused. “Do not tell me you have not thought about it.” His face was serious, but Saryn could detect amusement behind the words.

“I did not…not until we reached Duevek. Still…just assuming that I agree to your idea, Lord Maeldyn, how will you and all the other lord-holders feel if I insist that every lord-holder name his eldest daughter as his heir, and if he does not have a daughter, his sister's eldest daughter? Or perhaps his eldest son's consort?”

“Do you think that wise?”

“Wise? I don't know, but something has to be done to stop this practice of bloodying the entire land to prove who is mightier.”

“How would the daughters prove their ability?”

“I have an idea about that.”

“I thought you might.” Maeldyn's voice was dry.

Yet Saryn could not sense either anger or dissatisfaction behind the dour-looking lord's words. “I would have them all trained at arms in the Westwind style, and none who could not be guards would be allowed to become lady-holders.”

“You seem to have that ability to train women.”

Saryn shook her head. “I can, but Captain Hryessa has done all the training in Lornth. I've had little enough time.”

“Except to teach my daughters more in an afternoon than I could have in an eightday. Your captain is also most adept at recruiting. In your name.”

Saryn smiled wryly. Already, more than a score of local women had appeared outside the holding walls, begging to be trained as guards.

“Before we reach Lornth, you will have more than two companies under arms. That is twice, perhaps four times what any other lord-holder now has available for men at arms. Even your head ostler was able to kill two men.”

Two?
Saryn hadn't realized that, but she hadn't asked, either.

“Oh, one other matter. Spalkyn, Lady Zeldyan, and I all agree that, should you agree to become overlord, you will also receive Duevek as your holding, as well as Lornth. With two holdings, you will have enough in income, in addition to tariffs, to support the forces required of an overlord.”

“And the others? Will they agree?”

“The ones who are no longer with us and have no heirs certainly cannot object. From what Lady Zeldyan has indicated, neither Jharyk nor Barcauyn will object, and that would suggest a majority will support you.”

“Or not oppose me openly,” said Saryn.

“They will all know that the alternatives are far worse.”

“What about Lord Spalkyn?”

“He cannot state so openly, but he would be most relieved if one of his daughters could succeed him.”

“They do show promise,” Saryn admitted.

Maeldyn glanced toward the study door. “If you would excuse me, Commander, I believe Lady Zeldyan would like a word with you.”

“You all have talked this over, haven't you?”

Maeldyn stood, then shrugged. “Like you, we wish the fighting and the bloodshed to end. I especially agree with your point about Lornth needing a tyrant—a benevolent and intelligent tyrant, but one who will not hesitate to destroy a rebellious lord. Times have changed, and if we do not change with them, we will perish. I would preserve what we can, rather than lose all.”

Saryn stood. “I would like to talk to Zeldyan before I make a final decision.”
As if you already haven't, but there is the business of being political.

“That is most reasonable and right.” Maeldyn smiled knowingly.

Saryn almost shook her head ruefully. She definitely needed Maeldyn as one of her advisors.

The stern-faced lord opened the door, holding it for Zeldyan, who entered quietly. Maeldyn stepped out and closed the door behind himself. Saryn gestured to the table, but only reseated herself as Zeldyan sat down.

“You are going to become overlord, aren't you?” said Zeldyan, although her tone made clear that she was not really asking the question.

“Lord Maeldyn requested that I consider it. I told him that I would not decide until after I talked with you.”

“You don't need my approval.”

“But your advice and support I do need,” said Saryn as warmly as she could. “You will be one of the most influential holders if I so decide.”

“You are kind.”

“I'm trying to be practical. You deserve to hold your family's lands. You deserve to be the overlord…” Saryn hoped Zeldyan would reply.

“The other lord-holders would not agree, and I do not have the power or the ability at arms that you have shown. You have bested everyone who has come against you.” Zeldyan smiled. “Besides…does either of us have a choice?”

Saryn laughed softly. “You have me, Lady. For everyone's sake, including my own…what choice do I have? I cannot return to Westwind. Westwind cannot support another two companies of guards at present.”
Nor could I deal with Ryba any longer.
“There is no lord-holder powerful enough to hold Lornth together or to stand against the Suthyans or the Jeranyi.” Saryn stopped.

“And what of me, now that I have served your purpose, Saryn?”

“You did not serve my purpose.” Saryn smiled sadly. “I came to Lornth with only the goal of preserving your regency. The problem was—”

“That to preserve me, you ended up destroying the Lornth that was, just as the other angels began that destruction in order to save me. Now, what of me?”

“I would still be your friend and your supporter. You hold The Groves, Lady, in your own right, and you may consort as you like, if that is your choice, or not. One way or another, you will determine your family's holdings. I will stand behind you, as I always have. You know, as do Lord Maeldyn and Lord Spalkyn, that the time has come for change.” Saryn shook her head. “You may not believe me, but I never left the Roof of the World with this, or anything like it, in mind.”

Zeldyan smiled wanly. “That I do know, and that makes it all the sadder, that we could not resolve our differences, and that an angel from beyond the Rational Stars must descend to set things right. You will create a legend, you know, and generations of girls will look to you.”

And if that is so, generations of men will curse me.
“Only if I am successful, and that will be so only if you and others support me.”

“How could I not? You saved my life, and you are the only one who will grant me my due as my father's daughter.”

“For your sake,” Saryn said gently, “I wish it had not come to this.”

“I thank you for those words.” Zeldyan offered another sad smile.

Saryn could sense the mixture of sadness, acceptance, and appreciation…and the grief beneath, which the former regent might bear all the rest of her days. “I would also be your friend…Zeldyan.”

“I would be yours…also.”

“I would like that very much.” And that, also, was truth, Saryn knew, for, if matters did work out, Zeldyan might well be the only woman in all Lornth who would understand a fraction of what Saryn felt.

BOOK: Arms-Commander
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