Autumn Rising (21 page)

But then the back door on the other side of the car opened, and another man climbed out. A man with light blond hair and several lines of scars running
across his face.

Chogan grabbed
Autumn, pulling her behind him. “What the hell is he doing here?”

“
It’s okay, Chogan. He helped me escape.”

“Yeah? With Peter
Haverly, too? You guys seem to have a bit of a talent of escaping from impossible situations.”

“You’re here, too, Chogan,” Peter said. “It seems you also escaped an impossible situation
. The same one I did, in fact,”

But he didn’t get the chance to say anything more. A small
boned, dark haired woman flew at Peter, leaping into his arms. Chogan watched with a strange feeling of jealousy as Mia wound her arms around Peter’s neck, standing on tiptoes to kiss him, long and full, and hard on the mouth. Peter kissed her back, his fingers running up her back and lacing in her hair. They seemed to have forgotten everyone else. They broke apart, touched noses as they spoke to each other in muted tones, but Chogan could guess what they were saying—
I love you, I missed you, I’m so glad you’re here.
His jealousy didn’t stem from any feelings about Mia, but because he wished his reunion with Autumn had been so simple.

Mia remembered her friend and
broke herself apart from Peter to go and hug Autumn. “You scared the crap out of me,” Mia told her.

“I know. I’m sorry.”

Mia turned toward Thorne and placed her hand on her hip. “And what’s that asshole doing here?”

“Like I told Chogan, he helped me escape. He’s turned his back on the government department responsible
for abducting me.”

“He was the one to abduct you,” she said, speaking the words that had formed on
Chogan’s lips. He was thankful to have Mia on his side for this.

“Technically, yes, but someone else
is issuing the orders. That’s who we need to focus our attention on.”

Autumn looked hopefully over
Chogan’s shoulder. “Where’s Blake? He’s with you, right? You got out together?”

His heart sank. It was hard enough telling Lakota. Now he was about to break
Autumn’s heart as well.

He shook his head.
“Autumn, I’m so sorry.”

She stared at him, unable or unwilling to comprehend what he was saying. “Where is he?” she asked again, but this time at a whisper.

“I’m sorry,” he repeated, hot tears pricking behind his eyes. “He didn’t—”

“No!” she cried. “N
o, no, no!”

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I did everything I could.”

She staggered a little as if suddenly weak, and then pulled herself together, focusing on Chogan. She threw herself at him, battering his chest with her fists. “I don’t believe you,” she sobbed. “I don’t believe you.”

He struggled to get a hold of her, her f
ists pounding against him. It was what he deserved. He deserved her punishment. But then he saw what he was doing to her, the violence pushing her toward an edge he wasn’t sure she’d be able to come back from.

“Autumn, stop it,”
he said. But she kept going, and he grabbed her more forcefully. “I said, stop it!”

He held her at arm
’s length, both fists closed around her wrists. She stared at him as if suddenly remembering where she was and then burst into tears. He pulled her against him, wrapping his arms around her, holding her close and tight as she cried against him. He placed his face in her hair, against the top of her head, inhaling her scent, filled with guilt that Blake would never get the chance to do this again. It should have been Blake standing here, not him. He’d caused this whole mess. He’d gotten so many people killed.

He didn’t deserve to be holding the girl of his dreams, even if she was crying over someone else.

Chapter Twenty-three

AUTUMN’S TEARS DAMPENED
the material of Chogan’s black t-shirt, his body heat penetrating to warm her face as she cried against him. Her hands clutched at him, wanting his strength to hold her up, needing him to physically stop herself from crumbling.

Blake, dead?
No, surely it couldn’t be true. Blake was too strong to simply no longer exist. She’d seen him shot and still come back. What could possibly have ended his life?

But s
he couldn’t bring herself to speak right now. A hole had opened up inside her, a deep void she felt she was tumbling into. She cried until her throat hurt, a wailing moan she was too far gone to be embarrassed that came from her mouth. She was aware of Chogan’s strong arms around her, how he held her tight. The heat of his breath gusted against her hair. His whole body seemed tightly coiled, as if he was trying to hold himself back from something, and that’s when she realized she wasn’t the only one grieving for the loss of Blake.

When the tears finally subsided, she took a little shuddering breath
, and forced herself to pull herself together. Blake was Chogan’s cousin. Even though the two men had had their differences, she didn’t think for a moment that Chogan wasn’t suffering his cousin’s loss. She been caught in her own grief, not thinking for a moment how all the other people who loved Blake would have been feeling.

Ducking
her head, she stepped back from him, suddenly embarrassed and awkward at the outburst of emotion she’d displayed. She and Chogan had always had a complicated relationship. The last time they’d been together he had kissed her, and she’d kissed him back, and now here she was soaking his shirt crying over the death of his cousin.

She was also aware of the huge
lineup of vehicles and people on the other side of the street. They stood, watching the scene play out before them. No one looked away from her grief.

“How did it happen?” she asked
, eventually. Her voice sounded hoarse and raw from crying.

Chogan didn’t seem to want to meet her eye.
“He was protecting his sister during the escape from the compound. She couldn’t run because of the shift, and Rhys was supposed to have been carrying her. But a chopper started firing into the clearing and Rhys left Tala and ran. Blake threw himself over her to stop her from being shot. He took the bullets himself. I tried to carry him to safety, but it was too late. I’m sorry, Autumn.”

A surge of anger filled her, creating a red haze across her vision. “It’s not your fault. It was that bitch, Tala!”

Chogan pressed his lips together and briefly closed his eyes before saying, “Tala’s gone, too. We don’t know if she’s dead or alive.”

“Good. I hope she’s dead.” She
spat out the words before she’d even had a chance to think about what she’d said. Her own fury surprised her.

“
Autumn ...” he said, almost pleading.

“What? After what she did to me, and now she got Blake killed! Do you really think I’m going to have any other reaction?”

“Autumn, please.” He turned to glance over his shoulder.

She followed the line of his vision.
Lakota stood beside an old, battered truck, and the truth of the matter sank in. He’d lost both his son and his daughter. “Oh, Lakota, I’m so sorry.”

Her cheeks heated with shame at her outburst. Here was a man who had lost more than she could ever imagine. She had no right to put down one of his lost ones, whatever she might think.

He raised a lined hand. “It’s okay, Autumn. I understand your reaction.”

She shook her head at herself. “I’m sorry.”

“We’re all sorry for what’s happened, but being sorry isn’t going to make things right again with the world.”

For the first time, she allowed herself to truly process the immense number of vehicles and people behind Lakota’s truck. There
was no way anyone else could have made it through the traffic.

“What’s going on here?” she asked.

“We’re going to Chicago,” Mia told her, her hand in Peter’s, standing so close to him their sides pressed together. Peter’s face was pale and drawn, his green-gray eyes glassy with unshed tears. Of course, he’d been one of Blake’s best friends. It was only natural for the news of Blake’s death to hit him hard as well. Mia seemed to understand his grief, keeping him close to her side. She glanced up at him with wide, worried eyes, and he gave her a small smile of reassurance. Autumn’s heart clenched in pain. Their easy comfort with one another only served to remind her of the man who was missing, and further increase Autumn’s awkwardness at Chogan’s proximity.

“We’re going to show the government that shifters
can’t be messed with so easily,” Mia finished. Then she mouthed,
I’m sorry about Blake.

Autumn gave her friend a nod of thanks.
She turned to Chogan. “Is this your idea?”

He shook his head. “I’ve made too many mistakes. I can’t lead them
anymore.”

“So who is?” She looked to Lakota, but he, too, shook his head.
He moved away from the side of his truck, crossing the divider to stand on her side of the freeway.

“I’m just an old man.”

She turned to Mia, who shrugged, and Peter said nothing.

“You’re the one who is special,
Autumn,” Lakota said. “You’re the one with all the power. The one who can swing this battle one way or the other.”

“But how?” she said, suddenly desperate. “You want to make more shifters? How do we do that, exactly? Every attempt I’ve seen so far has only resulted in some kind of half-breed.”

Lakota placed a hand over his heart. “When these scientists have tried to create spirit shifters, they have been focusing on the shifter side of things, and not on the spirit. Spirit shifters can be created, but rituals must go with the transformation. Your blood will create the physical change, but the spirits themselves must be welcomed into the bond, not forced.”

She stared at him in wonder. “Is that really all it takes?”

“It’s more complicated than it sounds, but yes, that’s what it takes.”

Autumn felt as though a light had entered her soul. Everything suddenly became clear to her. It was time she stopped questioning her powers, stopped doubting herself. All it had led to was people thinking they could use and abuse her, that she was some kind of commodity that could be funneled or exchanged or bartered with. She needed to take control, and decide what
she
wanted.

She needed to stop being afraid, both of what she could do, and of what people could do to her.

Autumn became aware of all the people standing on the other side of the highway, as far back as she could see, in a way she hadn’t before. They were all frightened of what the government might do to their loved ones, though they were willing to make a stand. She had the ability to give them something important—hope. She needed to decide which side she was on—if there was ever any doubt in her mind—and take control.

“
It has to be me,” she said, partly to herself. “If they’ll have me, I’ll be honored to be the one who leads them.”

Autumn
pushed past Chogan and crossed the highway. Lakota, Chogan, and the others all followed her. She half expected them to call her back, and tell her she was crazy, but no one did. With her heart thumping, she climbed up onto the roof of Lakota’s truck. She wobbled for a moment, the height seeming so much greater from up here than it did from the ground, and then got her balance. She looked out across the seemingly never ending convoy of vehicles, all badly beaten up. They were no match for the government, except by their sheer number. Most of the people had climbed from their cars and stood beside them. Those on bikes had removed their helmets—if they wore them at all—and stood, waiting for her to speak.

They’re never all going to hear me,
she worried. But she didn’t need her concern. As she spoke, her words were taken in, and then repeated, passed back through the crowds.

Autumn addressed them directly. She did
n’t need anyone else to speak for her.

“Most of you won’t know who I am. My name is Doctor Autumn Anderson, and I was the one taken by the government to try to create shifters for their own use.
” She spoke as loudly as she could without feeling as though she was shouting at them. “I’m told that I’m a descendant of the people who originally created spirit shifters, and within my blood is the ability to create more shifters.”

She glanced over the crowd to see how her claim had been taken. Most had already heard about who was at the heart of the sudden change in their lives, so they listened intently.

Autumn continued, “I’ve been given a great gift, a privilege, to be able to create spirit shifters. It’s a gift the government wants to exploit and control. They want to control you, too, to segregate shifters from regular people, to tear your children from your arms, to force your elderly parents from their homes, to snatch your siblings from by your side. They don’t care who gets hurt just as long as they can control us for their own gains. Instead of the government creating its army of shifters, we can, and we can use it to fight back.”

“There are too many of them!” a voice shouted from the crowd.

Autumn cast her eyes over the hundreds of heads until she spotted the person who had spoken—a Native American man in his forties.

“I can help,” she replied. “The
government wasn’t able to achieve what they wanted because they were missing one vital ingredient, and this time it wasn’t a physical ingredient. They were missing the spiritual side of what it means to be a spirit shifter, the symbiosis of two spiritual beings inhabiting one body. They forced the shift and created a creature who fought for control of its own body—each soul believing it had the right to their true form. But we can change that.” She gestured to the older man now standing beside his automobile. “Lakota Wolfcollar knows the ritual that is so important in creating a spirit shifter. With his help, and the use of my blood, we can create enough shifters to outnumber the army. It will be a war. It won’t be easy, and it will take time, but we are more powerful than them.”

“So who gets to turn?” another voice called out.

“Whoever wants to. I can’t promise what your spirit guide will be, but I can promise that you will be stronger than ever before. I’ve lost people in this fight—people I love—and I refuse to let the government use me again. I am behind you all, I am for you all, but I need for you to be behind me too. They want to repress shifters, to punish anyone associated with us, but I say enough is enough. We are the strong ones. We won’t let them oppress us any longer!”

A roar of ‘yeah’ filled the air
. A chant slowly began to rise from the crowd, dim at first, but growing louder with every second. And slowly Autumn’s ears began to pick up on what was being said.

Fists were raised
to punch the air in rhythm to the mantra, and she looked out over a sea of people—men and women alike.

All of them chanting her name.