Awakening - Book of Fire (Blood Heritage #1) (24 page)

This is a ceremony of life, Easter, as it will later be called. The celebration of his rising, his awakening and a time of new life. The sacrifices, his precious followers, the others merely pawns in his continual game of manipulation. No one will ever know he is the cause of their suffering. He will always be the blessed one, the savior. He will remain powerful by their love and admiration as well as by the fear that fills them for the unknown that comes after this world. He fills them with visions of suffering and pain greater than they can possibly imagine and then torments them with a taste of that suffering within their guarded lives. Somehow he manipulates the senses into believing he is the cessation, the freedom from that pain and without him each and every one of them will burn for eternity within the fires of hell.

The women call on him when they are freed, and he comforts them and heals their wounds. He eases their burdens and offers them forgiveness for their base desires. He makes them feel this is all their doing, and he is their only salvation from eternal damnation. They cry at his feet and beg for his love and on the surface he gives it. He is generous and kind after all. Those he chooses as worthy take the sacrament with him. Eating of his body and drinking of his blood they receive eternal life at his side. Wandering the world satiating their bloodlust on the innocent, sending survivors running back to him in fear of the demons he creates....an endless cycle of deception and slavery.

Those he doesn't offer the gift of the bloodline too are simply sent off and told to have faith that all will be well for them in the next world, that this life may be painful and hard, but their eternity will be full of treasures if they only have the strength to believe. Empty promises that bring hope to the hopeless and peace to the dying. That give reason for the evil and the darkness surrounding us, and distract us so we don't clearly see what is going on. To question is to admit you are faithless and therefore unworthy of his love and the rewards it provides, so most of us choose not to question.

Even those not of his blood Are calling upon him, worshiping him as their savior. It is all going perfectly. There are wars fought in his name and on his behalf that prove to be excellent distractions. There are men who take on his teachings and rid the world of many of his father’s children in the process, calling them witches and demons. These are convenient and unforeseen circumstances that he truly enjoys. His father certainly cannot blame him for the misguided actions of religious fanatics he is not influencing personally. Humans are excellent pawns, and they take their job very seriously.

Rissa sees it all clearly, the masquerade, the illusion. She understands the ways of her father, and feels sickened. She had already known some of the story, but had not really understood the kind of cruelty it takes to twist reality so perfectly. To be loved and adored by the very sheep you are leading to slaughter. The women give birth and enjoy the happiness of it all for a time. Those deemed worthy are taken by the father, the boys of his blood are unwanted and die before their time. Never growing to breed. He knows he misses one now and then, but it is no matter since he will never give them eternal life, they will fade away eventually into dust like all the others.

Besides, some of his sons serve him quite well, becoming some of the most infamous men in history. Despite not having their savior beside them, within them, the blood lust of their genetics is insatiable. They become warlords, mercenaries, and murderers. Ghengis Khan, Hitler, Manson, take your pick. They help to keep the his flock living in fear turning to their God for protection from the demons he so carefully chooses. Their deeds covering the damage his children inflict, ensuring their survival. As long as there is war and conflict within the human race, his children can hide easily within the chaos. His beautiful women. Some nations call them Vampire, others Succubus, while still others call them Banshee, Mermaid or Siren, there are many names given to them, but all are feared. This is the true army of the Son of God. Churches and congregations merely diversionary tactics, distractions for weak human minds. It amuses him to hear man speak of all that he knows with such a sense of surety when so much he refuses to see and recognize lies just below the surface of his perception. What fun it could be if mankind were forced to wake from their dreams of denial, and see the world around them for what it truly holds. If the prophecies hold true he will not have to wait much longer, the war over humanity and possession of the dying world is in it's beginning stages, the board is prepared and the queen has been placed.

Rissa is meant to become one of these dark creatures, she has the blood within her. She is powerful and gifted already, all she has to do is ask and he will give it to her. The thought comes on like heavy rain and she feels his awareness of her, she quickly chants her protection and hides within the darkness again, not wanting him to find her. She is not interested in the life he wants to give her, the Circle has opened her eyes to the truth. She will not become another pawn in his game.

Rissa considers the scope of what she has seen, or more aptly, what she has been shown.
Who is giving her the information?
the visions look as though they are being seen by the eyes of someone actually present and the rest of her experience is spoken in her mind in a voice she does not recognize. She is taken there, seemingly invisible, and given glimpses into the past. Someone waits inside her mind, and she has no control over the access they have. She is nervous and angry at the entire world. Rissa knows she hides far better from herself than she hides from him, her father, her enemy.

And the Son of God calls on her to open her eyes and she cannot refuse, his will is inside her, the hell that surrounds her stops her heart from beating, she cannot breathe the sulphur burning her eyes and lungs is too strong. This cannot be!... She cries out with her last breathe, shutting her eyes hard against the onslaught. And then quiet... only a vision, her own death....Things are changing and now she knows true fear.

The gravity of the problem is overwhelming to Rissa and her heart aches as she rationalizes and processes with the burden of truth resting heavily on her shoulders.

How stupid can we be? Blind and so desperate for freedom from responsibility for our actions that we follow despite the warnings our hearts give. The protesting rants of our logical minds and the undeniable evidences of the twisted and violent world we live in. We follow on a word that has no meaning other than utter stupidity. A word created out of religious politics to instill guilt within us for daring to doubt, for questioning that which is unquestionable, a word created to control the free will of Man. Faith.... This one word the foundation for the undoing of millions of people murdering and being murdered for their beliefs, or lack thereof. Those slaughtering and slaughtered in crusades, inquisitions, and racial purifications. The one word responsible for more death and suffering than any other on earth. Faith. The word that instructs us to close our eyes and open our hearts to a God we truly know nothing about. We do not let people into our homes that we are not fully aware of their background, intentions and purpose and yet we allow a powerful being to bind our souls for eternity without a single doubt that he might not have our best interests in mind.

How can we be so blinded, so lost to our own purposes. Though she senses therein may be the problem altogether. We have no purpose, there is no evidence of higher reasons for our existing other than existence itself. There is nothing before or after to reach for. We are simply human, simply the cattle of higher beings bent on manipulating our existence merely to see what might happen. How sad that we hold ourselves so high above other creatures when ultimately we are all a part of the same universal balance; ultimately the only thing that actually matters in the big picture. Her mind swirls with doubts, emotions and frustration as she reaches for something that makes sense. Each realization opening doors to new possibilities and philosophical questions no one would dare talk about in public.

Rissa has to wonder, if there is no purpose, what is it within some of us causing us to question and to rebel. What causes the children of the Gods to form organizations like the Circle, seeking out the truth no matter what the cost. What causes some to seek out others to save from the tragic fate they would otherwise suffer. What is it driving some to hunt the monsters in the darkness and to stand up and face the very Gods themselves in order to obtain... what? What is it they are hoping to obtain. Freedom....The word echoes to her from somewhere distant, isn't it is always about freedom?... The only thing worth living for and the only thing worth dying for. She has been called into this circle to fight for the same thing every other war is fought over. The simple right to choose, to live, and to become what she chooses to become. She will choose Free Will. One cannot be a slave and be free at the same time, there is only one or the other. There is no grey area.

She will never bow before her father, asking for forgiveness or for eternal life, she is not interested in these things. Without freedom, eternal life will be nothing more than slavery, a prolonged nightmare. Rissa has chosen her side of the battle and has drawn her line in the sand. She feels power within her and though she knows where it has come from, she claims it as her own. She will nurture it and strengthen it to full potential without him. Someone powerful out there is helping her and that helps to make her feel ready. Someone is on her side, out there waiting to help her find the answers.

It seems the more they learn the more questions are left unanswered. Everyone in this mix of circumstances is in a state of upheaval. Beliefs and perceptions are questioned at every turn and just when the ground seems solid beneath their feet, something else gives way. In one fell swoop reality becomes the fantasy and there is no longer a clear differentiation.

Joanna finds herself completely stumped. There is no possible way she can come up with to explain the girls’ skin, and the missing birthmarks. There is no explanation for the endorphins, or the mutilated organs of Amber's step father. She is drowning in questions and even the slightest hint of an answer only makes the situation worse for her. She has begun to feel complicated feelings again for James and she knows it is only her guilt and selfishness for how she hurt him in the first place. She still wants him there and available even though there is no logic in it. She is still a woman, and women don't have to be logical. Even scientists have their moments of insecurity. Love and desire have nothing to do with science after all.

Joanna is a passionate woman and has come between the two most amazing men she has ever met, loving them both, has given her body to them and wrapped them around her little finger. It was never her intention to break the strength of their friendship or twist their hearts into angry and jealous knots, men too have irrational feelings sometimes. She follows her feelings and her desires, taking what she wants, when she wants it. Looking back now she knows she made the biggest mistake of her life. She can't mend the pain she caused James, she is powerless to return his friendship with her husband. She fails to hide the desire in her eyes when she looks at him and she cannot force her feelings to fade. They don't serve her well, she is left feeling she is living a lie. She loves her husband and there is no doubt they are meant to be together. Why is she finding it so impossible to make her desire for James just disappear?

He has found love, she can see it in his eyes, and the way he moves. Amber gives him purpose. He is strong, confident and extremely sexy again. The pain and the weakness she caused him has disappeared. Amber makes him happy and though Joanna is glad to see it, it also torments her. He has been lost to her. There is no going back now. She can't leave her husband at any moment and fall into his waiting arms and bed. The security is gone. She feels like a total ass for even thinking of him in this way, but it is the truth of it. She has lost her fall-back guy and it stings. She has to buck up and take it. It is her turn to suffer a little on his behalf. It is well earned and Karma is a bitch sometimes.

She determines to break this case to make it up to him. She will find something to help him with the most difficult puzzle they have ever faced. Seeing him as a colleague and a friend and nothing more is a challenge, but she is developing her boundaries, refraining from looking at him with the desire he reads on her in an instant. If she guards her emotions, she can finally set him free. She knows this will help him to be happy. She sets her mind back on the case and begins to muddle through all of the details that don't seem to make any sense. She tries to stop dreaming about kissing him, remembering how his body felt up against her, but she can't forget the passion she has known with him and no one else. He is very different from her husband, more wild and less stable, more passionate and less steadfast, more rough and tumble and less refined. These were her reasons for not choosing him when she had the chance, and now they are the very things she finds so appealing about him.

She never wants to forget the rain pouring down over them as he kissed her. The wind threatening to blow them over, a hurricane blowing around them as he stops the world with his touch. They stood allowing everything to wash away around them, his arms the most perfect and safe place in the world. Perhaps it is the realization that her life is again falling into chaos that is causing his current desirability. She wants comfort and an anchor from the storm that is so devastatingly brewing around them. She can't discuss the case and all it's gory and frustrating details with her husband and it is driving her crazy. Deciding her marriage is far more important than the rules, Joanna intends to bring her husband into her world. Hoping there is something he can help her see she is missing, she is willing to take the risk. Joanna needs to allow Tanner to save her this time.