Awakenings (Elemental Series - Book 1) (6 page)

“Hello, Mr. Silverman is expecting you,” the receptionist said quietly. “One moment, please.” She picked up the phone on her desk.

“Mr. Silverman is in the office down the hall and to the right.” The woman pointed towards a dimly lit hallway. We made our way to a door labeled “Director.”

It opened before we had a chance to knock. The man in the doorway extended his hand. “I’m Mr. Silverman. Jacey, Hudson, and Grace, I am sorry for your loss.” Mr. Silverman ushered us into his office.

We took four seats positioned by a huge bay window looking out into a beautiful field. Framed within the window was a small pond surrounded by bushes of flowers in every color imaginable and tall maple and oak trees.

Mr. Silverman took a seat at an old antique desk situated in the far back corner of the room. If you didn’t know this was a funeral home, the atmosphere felt like something my parents would have designed for themselves. Mom would have fallen in love with the view outside the window and Dad would have felt right at home in the earth tones and tranquil feel of the room.

“These are meant for of you,” Mr. Silverman said. He took two envelopes out of his desk. He handed the first to Hudson and the second to Aunt Grace. Hudson opened his envelope. Inside were two letters—one for him and one for me. Each of us read our letters in silence. Mine was in my mother’s handwriting.

Jacey:

If you’re reading this, your father and I are no longer with you. The arrangements Mr. Silverman is proceeding with are the ones your father and I have selected.

While we are no longer physically with you, we will always watch over you. There will be dramatic changes in your life. They will transform you into the beautiful, special young person your father and I have always known you to be. The changes will come and you will feel lost, confused, and awed. All your father and I have done has enabled you to thrive.

You’re the one we’ve all placed our hopes and dreams on. In time, you’ll understand why.

If anything happened to us, we have always been prepared to leave you in the care of your brother and your Aunt. Trust your Aunt; she has always been there for us.

From this moment on, Grace will show you and Hudson what you need to survive and thrive in this world and in other realms. We wanted to experience those places with you, however our choice was taken away long ago…Both you and Hudson will learn in time why we chose to live the way we have over the last fourteen years.

Your father and I will always be that voice in the back of your mind which tells you to go for it or to be wary. Grace will ask you to live with her. She is home, Jacey. We entrust you both to her.

Jacey— close your eyes and think of me—I will come. I will be there for every good, great, and bad moment you have in your life. You, daughter, are what I was missing before I met your father. I love you, I miss you, and most of all, I am proud of the girl you are and the woman I know you will become.

We do not wish for any funeral service. Our physical bodies will be turned over to you and Hudson in the form we came to be. “Ashes to ashes…” We love you always and forever, little one… Our love eternally,

Mom and Dad

I looked up from the letter, which smelled of my mom’s perfume, and placed it in my lap. I looked first at my brother and then at Aunt Grace. The anguish I felt was mirrored in both their expressions.

In my aunt’s, I saw the love and commitment I’d seen every day in my parents’ faces. Grace was our way to say good-bye to my parents and our way of holding onto them. She was our future, but what would it, could it be? When we didn’t have a choice, we had to move on. But how?

We sat in a communal silence. I knew Hudson was holding back. I could tell by the pulse in his jaw he was having a hard time holding it together. With the reality of not seeing our parents’ bodies, I knew deep down he wasn’t going to be able to accept they were gone. For him there would be no closure. I could feel the pain, which was completely evident in his eyes and body language.

I, on the other hand, was feeling quite guilty. I’d been dreading the thought of seeing my parents lying in a coffin. My mind and gut were in a battle. My mind was stuck on being the reason they were gone and my gut was relieved when I read the last couple lines of my parents’ note.

Mr. Silverman stood up and went to a panel on his wall. He’d been so quiet while we read through our letters that I’d almost forgotten he’d been there at all. He raised his hand and touched it. Instantly, the wall slid to the right, revealing an inner room.
It was
very James Bond-ish.

He entered the room briefly. He came toward us, holding the most exquisite metal urn I’d ever seen. It was bronze and covered in deeply carved symbols and inscriptions.

He held it out to us. “The wishes of your parents were very clear. They left no room for questioning what they wanted for themselves. I’m both honored and humbled that your parents chose to entrust themselves and their final words to me. They were people of courage, love, and integrity. If there’s anything more we can do for you, now or in the future, please let us know.”

He then returned our parents to us. Hudson was stoic. I, on the other hand, reached out, grabbed the urn, and pulled it into my chest. It was heavy and cold. The metal shimmered in the light from the lone window in the room.

Aunt Grace stood between Hudson and I. She put one hand on each of our shoulders and said, “I’d be honored if you chose me to share the rest of your lives with. I love you both as though you were my own.” She paused to compose herself.

Both Hudson and I looked up at her. Sincerity rang from each and every word she’d spoken. There was no doubt she had spoken from her heart. I was certain now Hudson and I would go with Aunt Grace

“Thank you, Aunt Grace. Thank you for loving us and for being here…now and forever.” I barely whispered. Hudson didn’t say a word—he only shook his head in agreement.

All three of us embraced. Jen sat watching us without a word. I went over to her and she hugged me.

“I’ll always be here for you, Jacey. No matter where you are. All you have to do is ask and I’ll be there.” I knew she meant every word. I felt it in my heart and soul. Jen was more than a friend, she was family.

“I know—thank you for being here,” I replied.

I took one last look at the pond and bushes outside the office window. I was comforted by the thought of my parents choosing this place for their final goodbye to us. I could picture them here—loving, carefree, and committed. I turned to walk out, when suddenly, standing there, hand in hand outside of the picture window, was my parents. They stood, smiling directly at me.

I took a quick look around to see if anyone else was seeing what I was and knew they weren’t—I was the only one having this break from reality. I must be losing my mind… who sees their
dead
parents and doesn’t freak? Well, that would be me—I wasn’t disturbed by their presence whatsoever. I smiled back at them and they slowly faded away into the lush greenery.

The ride home was quiet and thought filled. I hadn’t let go of my parents since they were returned to me. I studied the markings on the urn the whole way home. They resembled the ones on the ceiling in my room. An old worry came back, invading my thoughts while I examined the markings. We were going to have to move—again.

I knew Aunt Grace would want us to move to her home in Nevaeh. I’d never been there—well, not that I could remember. It started to feel a little like the air was being sucked out of the car as we reached our driveway. Hudson parked and everyone got out except for me. I needed to take three deep breaths to steady myself so I didn’t pass out. When I was able to breathe a little easier, I got out.

“Jacey, you okay?” Hudson asked.

“Yeah,” I replied, knowing I was the worst liar ever. Not only were my parents dead and gone, now, I’d lose the only place I’ve ever lived in that felt like
home,
too. Hudson, on the other hand, would be fine. He’d pick up and start over without any problems. He’s always fit in no matter where we ended up. He’s the jock extraordinaire who’s never had any problems making friends. He’s what Mom and Dad called easy.

I could be described as neurotic, shy, self-conscious. I got more introverted with every move we made. The main difference with this move was my uncertainty, I’d have to deal with my issues by myself this time.

My epiphany came to light in the short walk from the car to the house. It wasn’t this
house
which made my pulse beat in my eyes and my heart feel like it was in my throat, the dilemma with this particular move was knowing this was the last place
we
, meaning
Mom, Dad Hudson and
I, had called home.

“Jacey, I have to get home, but call me and I’ll come over as soon as you want some company,” Jen said, bringing my attention back to everyone outside the house.

“Thanks. Thanks for coming, Jen.” I held my parents in my right hand and semi-hugged her with my left arm. I watched as she went down the driveway. I was feeling envious—an emotion I wasn’t used to having. I realized it was because Jen was able to go home. A home where she could see her parents, go to bed, wake up, and have them there with her the whole time. I would never be able to do any of that ever again.

Aunt Grace interrupted my pity session. “Jacey, let’s go in.” She put her arm around me. With her other one, she reached over and stroked my parents’ urn.

I went looking for Hudson when we got in. He wasn’t in the living room or the kitchen. I figured he was in his room. He needed some time to himself, but I wanted him here with me. For what seemed like the hundredth time in only two days, I felt alone and scared.

“Hudson… Hudson,” I called out as I walked into the basement, hoping he was there. I found him on the phone.

“Yeah, okay, when will you know? Okay. When should we expect to hear from you again?” Hudson looked my way and walked past me up the stairs into the kitchen. I waited a second then followed.

“Where’d he go? Who’s he talking to?” I asked Aunt Grace.

“I don’t know.” She stopped and went over to the sink. She was staring out into our backyard when I slipped out of the kitchen and into the living room. I wanted to eavesdrop on his conversation but he was nowhere to be found.

“Where’d he go now?” I murmured to myself as I
re-entered the kitchen.

“He needed some air. I saw him leave out the back,” Aunt Grace answered, walking away from the window. She was avoiding eye contact with me. She was as bad, if not worse, than Hudson when it came to hiding her emotions. Her eyes were red-rimmed and puffy, and she had a tissue up to her nose. I tried to give her some semblance of privacy and acted as if I hadn’t noticed her tear-streaked cheeks.

I still had Mom and Dad’s urn in my hands. I went and put them on the kitchenette and took a seat on one of the bar stools around it. I sat staring at the symbols and shapes on it. I’d been in a semi-slouched position when the smell of hot chocolate wafted over me, motivating me to sit up. When I moved, the stiffness in my back told me I’d been staring at the symbols for quite some time. Aunt Grace sat down beside me and placed a steaming cup of hot chocolate in front of me.

“Why do these look so familiar?” I said out loud.

“Take a closer look, Jacey,” Aunt Grace answered.

I picked up the urn and turned it round and round in my hands, staring at them until I went cross-eyed. I finally put it back on the table top.

“Wait a minute. That’s Taerw and Rife,” I announced.

“Yes, what else do you see?”

I picked it back up and turned it over and saw Ria and Hearte, Nidw and Kawaneing. “I see them. I see them all. I don’t get it. Why are they all here?”

I turned it slowly inspecting every inch of it now. I kept doing it until the symbols began to glow—literally. The colors flowing from it were so bright they were almost blinding.

I looked over at Aunt Grace. She was looking at me yet again, reverently. I put the urn back down on the countertop and it stopped glowing.

“What…was that?”

I thought Aunt Grace would’ve been freaked out as much as I was at the moment, but no… nothing. She was calmer than calm.

“Jacey, do you believe when we die we move on to another place?” she asked.

“Yeah.”

“So do I and so did your parents. I think they’re still very much here.” She waved a hand around. “And very much here.” She placed her hand over my heart.

“The energy your parents had, not only individually, but together, was the most amazing mix of love, chemistry, and commitment I’ve ever seen. If any two people could come back to us in any way, shape, or form, I believe your parents would be the ones to do it. I think they set the urn up to make sure both you and Hudson never forgot where you came from and who you both truly are.”

“Where we came from, who we are… what does that even mean?”

“All of these signs and symbols have meaning. They’re all independent of one another yet also quite interdependent. They symbolize life from the beginning. They’re the symbols of how and where we all come from. They’re the basic elemental guides to our origins. I know it sounds complicated right now, but once we’re in Nevaeh I know you’ll come to understand. Ria and I used to stare up at these same symbols when we were kids.”

“You did?”

“Yes, we always wondered how they came to be, so your Mom and I used to make up stories about them. Like this one.” She pointed to Rife.

“We would imagine a place of warmth and beauty. We’d think about lying on a beach and feeling the heat from the sun on our skin, all toasty-like. We’d imagine red waves of warmth wrap themselves all around us.” Aunt Grace closed her eyes as she spoke.

“Of course your mom was much more of a dreamer than I ever was. When we were together, it was like her energy and her fervor for life was infectious. Because of her I was able to go into my own thoughts and explore places I never could’ve by myself. She wasn’t just my sister—she was my best friend, and oh, do I miss her. She was always someone I could count on. Someone I knew who’d always have my back and be there for me no matter what.”

“I feel like that about Hudson. I’ve always been able to count on him. I never thought I’d ever find anyone else I could count on like that until I met Jen. I’ve never been able to explain why, but since the first day I met her she’s always felt more like family. Doesn’t really make sense, does it?”

“Of course it does. Back at home, my best friend Eve is to me what your friend Jen is to you. I think everyone comes into our lives for a reason. I believe each and every one of them serves a purpose. I know I’m the luckiest Aunt in the world to have both you and Hudson in my life.” She hugged me lightly and then went back to her seat.