Axel (Ride Series Book 3) (4 page)

I felt my entire being soften at watching the two of them together. “Yeah, he likes bananas,” I responded, feeling a tenderness toward him that up to this point, I’d only felt for Maddox. “He just started on some solid food.”

“I made coffee.” Axel cocked his head toward the coffee pot.

“Thanks,” I murmured gratefully, dropping a brief kiss on Mad’s head before moving to fill up a cup. “Can I get you a refill?”

“No, I’m good.” He shook his head, his eyes watching me move around the small space as I made Maddox his bottle.

“Do you want to feed him?” I asked quietly, handing him the warm bottle.

“Yeah,” Axel nodded, his expression unreadable as he took the bottle and gave it to Mad.

A knock sounded at the door and I saw Axel stiffen. “It’s just Jill,” I assured him, moving to open the door. Jill stood on the other side with Mason balanced on her hip. She breezed into the room.

“Is there coffee because this little stinker was up all…” She stopped mid-sentence, her mouth hanging open when she spotted Axel.

“Jill, this is Axel. Maddox’s father,” I introduced a bit awkwardly. The words weighed heavily in the air. I looked over, seeing a storm of emotion pass over Axel’s face at being referred to as a dad.

“Hi,” she choked out, her eyes wide with shock.

“Hey.” He gave her a chin lift, continuing to hold the bottle for Maddox who was sucking greedily.

“Are you still bringing Mad over while you go to work?” she asked me with wide eyes.

“Yes,” I answered at the same time Axel answered, “No.”

I glared at him.

“You okay, Soph?” she asked quietly; I could tell she was worried. I’d never spoken a word about Axel to her or the fact that he was a formidable biker with tattoos and a gruff personality.

“I know there’s a lot I haven’t told you,” I responded regretfully. “But I trust him. I’m good.” I assured her.

She peered around me with a shrewd gaze. “You gonna take care of my girl here because for a twenty-five year old, she lives like an old spinster,” she huffed and I rolled my eyes.

“I’m gonna take care of both of them,” he replied, meeting her skeptical gaze.

She gave an affirmative nod. “Okay, maybe I like him.” She headed to the coffee pot after putting Mason down on the baby blanket. Mad immediately started to squirm.

“He wants to sit with his best bud,” I told Ax, taking him from his lap and setting him down next to Mason.

“So how long are you in town for?” Jill asked Axel lightly.

“As long as it takes to get her to come home with me,” he answered without hesitation.

My eyes bugged out of my head at his declaration.

“Where’s home?” Jill asked with confusion.

I winced, again feeling guilt over how little I’d told her.

“Nevada,” Axel answered for me.

I’d only spent a short time there, but it was true. Nevada felt more like home to me than New York. Texas certainly had never quite fit. But all that didn’t mean returning was a smart move.

Jill cleared her throat. “Okay then, clearly you two have some things to work out.” She shot me a wry look. “I’ll just head back over to my place and we’ll talk later?” she questioned me with a raised brow.

“Yeah,” I murmured. “Let Axel and me talk. Mad might be over later,” I told her.

She nodded as Axel’s eyes narrowed. “Nice to meet you. My husband gets back this weekend. Don’t make him come kick your ass,” she warned Axel.

He chuckled, his demeanor lightening for the first time. “I’ll try.”

“She’s a good friend,” I told Axel after she’d scooped Mason up and shut the door behind her.

“Seems it,” he muttered, his eyes on Maddox.

“What’s going on here, Axel?” I blurted before I could stop myself.

“Seems like you’re going to go to work and I’m gonna watch our boy,” he stated matter-of-factly.

My eyes filled with unexpected tears. “But I’ve never left him with anyone but Jill. And you’re mad at me and…” I trailed off.

He stood, crowding my space, his face peering down into mine. “Mad doesn’t even cover it,” he countered. “I wish like hell you would have trusted me to take care of you. To protect you. I wish you hadn’t made this decision on your own that took you and my boy from me. I’ve lost a lot of time. But as mad as I am, remember that I came here for you, Soph, before I even knew about Maddox.” His voice dropped an octave as he continued. “The reasons I came back haven’t changed.”

I looked up into his earnest eyes and reluctantly nodded, biting my lip to the point of pain.

“He, um, he’ll need a nap at noon after he eats lunch,” I trailed off, looking to the side before giving him further instruction. This whole thing was so surreal. I felt so vulnerable leaving Maddox with anyone, even his daddy.

“Got it,” Axel nodded after I’d rattled off every instruction I could think of.

“Please call me if you have any questions,” I stressed. “And, Jill always knocks exactly how she did this morning. Anything else – don’t answer the door,” I said firmly, feeling mildly panicked at the thought.

He tipped my chin up. “Baby, it’s okay. I’m here. No one’s gonna get to you or Maddox,” he assured me.

“Okay,” I whispered.

“See you when you get home,” he murmured, watching my movements as I flew around the room gathering my things for my lunch shift at the restaurant.

“This is hard,” I whispered, tears filling my eyes again as I leaned down to kiss Maddox. I stood to face Axel. “I know I need to trust you. I know I robbed you of so much. But he’s all I have in the world,” I rasped, wiping my face and trying to pull myself together.

“Soph, I would never ever take him from you, if that’s what you’re worried about,” he said quietly, zeroing in on my true fear. “And he’s not all you have. You have me, too. You always did.”

Holy….wow. I wasn’t even sure what to do with that statement.

“Okay,” I agreed, knowing with crushing clarity that from that moment on, my life would never be the same.

Chapter 4

I
f a day could move any slower, they’d call it a month. Despite a busy lunch rush and texting Axel off and on all day, the day had dragged.

I rushed home just as the blistering sun was dipping in the sky, ready to hold my baby.

I heard commotion coming from my apartment as I neared the stairwell which made my feet move faster, running up the stairs and bursting through my front door in alarm.

What I found on the other side shocked me to the core.

It looked as though all the senior members of the Knights’ Motorcycle Club sat in my tiny living room with their women, though my brother and Kat were noticeably absent. Scarlet and Cole, Wes and Connie, Ettie and Mack all sat in various spots around the room.

“Oh, my God,” I breathed, my eyes shooting through the room until I spotted Mad sitting on his blanket with who must be Gracie toddling nearby.

She was walking? I couldn’t believe how much I’d missed.

“She’s walking,” I said dumbly, the door still hanging open behind me.

“Yeah,” Scarlet replied with a warm smile, standing to embrace me.

I couldn’t help it; she’d always been like a big sister to me. So comforting and accepting. I started to bawl like a baby.

“I missed you guys so much. But you shouldn’t be here!” I exclaimed through tears, worried beyond measure.

“Oh, honey, where else would we be? He’s so beautiful!” she gushed. “He and Gracie are best friends already,” she laughed, patting me soothingly.

“Where’s my brother?” I asked hoarsely.

“Here,” his deep voice surprised me from behind.

Scarlet released me, stepping back as I whirled to face Sal and Kat. They’d just arrived, bags on their shoulders.

Sal and I stared at each other for a moment before he stepped forward and pulled me into a bone-crushing hug. “Don’t you ever pull this shit again, Sophie, I swear to God,” he swore at me.

“Sorry,” I rasped as I was pulled out of Sal’s embrace and into Kat’s.

“What he said,” she warned, her bark holding less bite.

I drew back against the bump I felt. “Oh, my God! Are you…?”

She nodded with a grin. “About six months along now.”

“Congrats,” I whispered.

“Thanks,” she winked, pulling back to take a good look at me.

Mad whined then, pulling my attention away as everyone looked over at him. I crossed the room, scooping him up. He wasn’t used to so many people and his eyes were larger than normal as he looked around the room.

The room grew unnervingly quiet as my brother stared at my little boy. His dark eyes swept to me then to Axel, then back again.

“What. The. Fuck,” he seethed, glaring at Axel with such hostility I worried they’d come to blows at any second.

Axel’s countenance remained calm as he met my brother’s anger head on. Then his grey eyes moved to me. “I didn’t tell him,” he explained, stating the obvious as he moved to scoop Mad out of my arms with an ease I was shocked by. It seemed they’d had a good day.

“When were you two…? How? What the fuck?” Sal barked again in distress. If not for the circumstances, I might have laughed.

“When you went to New York for your grandfather’s funeral,” Axel spoke up and I was glad he did because I was certainly in no hurry to. “I followed you, had your back even though you didn’t know it. After you left, Soph and I well…we… This isn’t your business,” he growled with impatience. “The short version is we met, had a thing. I fucked it up but it resulted in this guy.” He cocked his head down toward Maddox who was drooling like a champ.

“So that whole time she was in Hawthorne you’d already known her. Did you know she was pregnant?” Sal demanded, his eyes wide and shining with confusion and anger.

“Hell, no!” Axel shook his head. “You think had I known that I would have acted like such a jackass? That I would have let her out of my sight? No, I’m guessing your fucked-up parents did something. We haven’t gotten into those details, but something made her scared enough to run,” he said with halted speech, his emotion such that I moved to take Maddox from him.

Sal’s dark gaze swung to mine, leveling me with the pain I saw reflected there. “How could you not have told me?”

“I had every intention to,” I rasped, watching him with wide eyes, guilt and apprehension rolling off me in waves. “I ran out of time.”

“All right, let’s lighten this shit up. Jesus,” Wes broke in, coming to give me a one-armed hug. “Who brought the beer?”

“Uh, what exactly is everyone doing here?” I asked hesitantly. “Not that I’m not thrilled to see you but…”

“We figured if you didn’t feel safe coming home, we’d bring home to you,” Connie grinned, moving in to hug me. “Axel got a head start as soon as Henry told Cole he’d seen you. But we were right behind him.”

So it had been Henry. I figured as much.

“But, I…I don’t know what to say,” I stammered lamely, overwhelmed with how much trouble they’d gone to, with how good they were to me.

“Say you’ll finally open up. Say you’ll trust us,” she pleaded with quiet intensity.

“I always trusted you,” I assured her. “It was never about that.”

She squeezed me briefly before stepping back. “Welp, my man’s right. Let’s lighten things up a bit. Where’re we eatin’? I’m starved.” She winked at me.

I could have kissed her for taking some of the heat off me.

Not half an hour later, we sat in the back room at Giovanni’s. Dwayne nearly had a heart attack when we’d all paraded in.

“If I’d known you had access to so many beautiful men, I would have camped out at your place!” he exclaimed after we were settled.

I gave him what I knew was a stiff smile. Even Dwayne couldn’t break my worried mood. I wanted to demand an explanation of what would happen next. What did there being here mean?

“Let’s order,” I suggested instead, handing Mad a plastic spoon to chew on while we waited.

“How is it that you’re so thin having a six-month-old?” Scarlet accused with a smile as she scooped out some baby food for Gracie.

“I can feed her, babe,” Cole offered, taking the jar from her and delivering a swift kiss on his wife’s cheek.

“She’s probably too busy to eat,” Connie put in, throwing me a wink.

I shrugged and offered her a shy smile, trying to ignore the tension I noticed in Axel’s posture at Connie’s flippant remark.

Cole shot me an appraising look, his expression guarded and I knew I was far from being out of hot water with him. I didn’t know Cole well, but as Vice President of the Knights’ MC, I knew he was not a man you messed with. He was also kind and the most devoted husband and father I’d ever seen. My gaze swung to Sal, sitting at the other end of the table, the anger rolling off him as Kat spoke in his ear. I knew she was trying to calm him down. He hadn’t said a word to me or to Axel since we’d left the apartment.

My stomach ached knowing I’d caused all this hurt, all this anger. I couldn’t eat a bite of my delicious-looking meal when it came. I was so overcome with worry that I felt sick. “Would you mind feeding Maddox for a few minutes?” I asked Axel who sat to my right.

“Yeah, you all right?” he asked, his tone concerned but distant.

I nodded and scooted my chair back, beelining for the bathroom as the tears escaped their prison and fell in an unrelenting onslaught.

I sobbed as quietly as possible in the bathroom, trying unsuccessfully to pull myself together, wiping my face and taking breath after breath, each as shaky as the last.

When a swift knock sounded followed by the door swinging open, I looked up in surprise as Sal strode in.

“You hate me,” I rasped in despair and he surprised me by pulling me into a hug, holding the back of my head as I sobbed into his chest.

“I don’t hate you, Soph. I’m just pissed you kept all this from me. Why?” he demanded, his chin resting on my head.

I hiccupped and wiped my eyes. “I didn’t tell you about Axel because you were so adverse to him spending time with me at all. I wanted to figure out what was between us, if anything, before I told you about him or the baby,” I explained. It was a weak excuse but it was the truth. “I always intended to tell you. I thought I had time. It was never my intention to leave Hawthorne. Regardless of what happened with Axel, I was planning to stay if you’d have me.” I saw his expression soften some and knew he believed me. “Please don’t be mad at Axel. He never wronged me. He just didn’t want me.” I shook my head.