B00C8324IS EBOK (14 page)

I never really saw this side of him before. It was a strange sensation having my knees buckle beneath me that way.

“I’m not
that
white. My lips aren’t
that
red.”

His strong hands suppor
ted my weight. “Sofia, you’re as fair as fair gets, and you should really see your lips after you’ve just been kissed.” He was looking at my mouth as if it were the tastiest treat he’d ever had the pleasure of having.

I couldn’t help but smile.
No wonder girls swoon…

“Ben and Sofia sitting
in a tree…”

It was almost funny the way Ben’s eyes widened the moment he heard Abby’s high-pitched sing-song voice. Both our gazes quickly shifted toward the door where the five-year-old was standing.

Mischief was written all over her small face as a smug smile lifted the corners of her lips. She was still wearing the denim skirt and pink button-down blouse she went to school in. Her right hand was planted firmly on her hip, while her left arm hung limply on her side, one arm of Colin, her stuffed elephant, clutched in her hand. Her blonde curls swayed from left to right, moving along with her head, which was bobbing from one side to the other as she finished her song: “…
K-I-S-S-I-N-G
.”

“You runt…” Ben glared at her. “What are you doing here?”

“Oversized meanie…” Abby stuck a tongue out at her older brother. “I came to see Sofia just like I always do when I get back from school,” she responded with all the dignity a girl her age could muster. “What are
you
doing here, Ben?” Her scowl disappeared and her face fell when she got a better look of his face. Whatever mischief she was about to cause was replaced by horror at what she saw. It looked like she was close to sobbing. “What happened to you, Ben? Why do you keep getting beat up?”

“Hey… Come on…” The expression on his face quickly softened, shifting from annoyance to guilt to concern. “Don’t cry, Abby. It’s nothing. A bunch of guys in school were just saying mean things about me and Sofia, so I had to beat them up…” He picked her up in his arms and began cradling her against him.

“But it looks like
they’re
the ones who beat you up, Ben.”

“Well, that’s only because you haven’t seen them yet, you midget.”

These were the type of moments that reminded me why Ben was such a catch. I was so moved by how gentle and sweet he was to Abby when he took the effort to pay attention to his little sister, that it took several minutes before questions began to flood my mind:
What were the guys saying about Ben and me? Was that what Connor was talking about in his text message? Did Ben put him up to it?
I then noticed how Abby was pushing against the gash on Ben’s side.
How could Ben not feel pain over that?

Ben planted Abby back on the ground.

She looked up at him, her curls falling to her back. “Just stop getting beat up, okay, big oaf? It makes mommy cry…”

At that, Ben and I exchanged glances. I could see the guilt in his eyes, even past the amused tone he took on when he poked Abby
on the head with his knuckles. “Sure, dwarfette.”

Annoyed
at being poked, Abby stomped her foot on the floor. “I know what I saw.” She then set her baby blue eyes on me. I had to swallow hard. Abby could really be a pain when she wanted to be. “I saw you two kissing!” It was almost as if I had betrayed her. “How could you do that, Sofia?” She wrinkled her nose. “It’s so gross… You kissed a giant ogre.”

“Hey…” Ben frowned.

Try as I might, I couldn’t stifle a giggle.

“Oh great… at least
you’re
having fun.” Ben glared at me.

At that moment, Amelia poked her head through the door. “
Sofia, if you’re not too busy, I’d like help preparing dinner.”

“I’ll be right down, Amelia,” I responded. I began to walk out the door. As I brushed past Ben, I quipped, “Fiona ended up with Shrek you know…”

“Do I look like Shrek to you?” Ben feigned indignation.

Abby burst
into uncontrollable giggles. I was also giggling as I faced the hallway, but any amusement faded away when I overheard Ben tell Abby, “Laugh all you want, midget, but I’m warning you… You can’t tell Mom and Dad about Sofia and me. You understand?”

Ouch. That stung.
I bit my lower lip as I made my way down the stairs and into the kitchen.
Is he ashamed of me? Am I going to end up as his big secret?

I remained quiet throughout dinner – not that there was much to say, considering it consisted mostly of Lyle scolding Ben over the fight. Amelia, of course, didn’t hesitate to put her two cents in. Abby, on the other hand, kept darting her glances from Ben to me and then back. She couldn’t seem to stop giggling throughout the whole meal.

After dinner, Amelia tucked Abby into bed and Lyle asked to have a private word with Ben. That left me to take care of cleaning up the table and doing the dishes. I welcomed the solitude. It allowed me to sort through my thoughts.

I was already unloading the dishwasher and putting the dishes in their proper places when I felt Ben’s hands hold my waist. He pulled my back against him, his lips falling
on the nape of my neck.

I paused what I was doing. “What is this between us, Ben?”

“What do you mean?”

“
This.
All the kissing…
Rose Red
… It’s too confusing… It’s going too fast. I’m having trouble keeping up.”

He moved to my side and leaned against the granite counter. He nodded, coaxing me to go ahead and speak my mind.
I couldn’t look him in the eye, so I just kept wiping the dishes dry and placing them where they belonged as I spoke.

“First, we argue
in the library and then you get into this big fight – apparently over comments that involved me, and now…
this
. You just broke up with Tanya for crying out loud. I don’t want to be your rebound, Ben. I’m not interested in becoming one of your flings.”

He remained silent as I finished getting the kitchen in order. When everything was done, he grabbed me by the shoulders and made me face him. “You are too important to me to be a rebound or a fling. Get that into your head,
Sofia. I’m tired of being just your friend and I want to give
us
a real shot.”

“Why now?”

“Because as I told you back at the truck, I feel like I’m losing you… I don’t want that to happen, Sofia.”

It didn’t feel like a good enough reason to start getting into a relationship that had too much potential to leave us both broken and hurt. “I’m scared,” I admitted. “What if this doesn’t work out?”

“Look… we don’t have to rush this… let’s take it slow if we have to.” His gaze was hopeful… expectant… desperate… “Let’s start with a date, and then let’s see where we go from there.”

“One date,” I agreed, “but I do have a condition…”

“Anything.”

“There will be no talk of
The Shade, of what happened there or of the hunters.”

Just the mention of those particularly touchy topics clouded the expression on his face, but he nodded in agreement. “Fine by me.”

“And one more thing…” I added. “If we do get serious about this, I don’t want to be your dirty little secret, Ben. We let Lyle and Amelia know.”

It hurt how he didn’t seem happy about that particular condition, but again, he agreed to my terms. “Of course.”

It was awkward how we parted. We didn’t talk about it, but for the first time, the idea of sleeping in the same bed with him felt wrong. We said good night to each other and went our separate ways. I spent a good deal of the night, debating within myself if I ought to sneak to his room, if only to have someone there in case I wake up from another nightmare.

Just when I
had made up my mind to stay alone, I heard my door creak open. The bed shifted and I turned to find Ben sitting on the edge of it. He didn’t need to explain. The look in his eyes told me enough about him needing the company. I made room for him and snuggled against him. His lips found my forehead. A kiss goodnight.

What Ben and I had used to be simple. We were best friends. We knew where we stood with each other. A couple of kisses, a few suggestive quips and an agreement to have one date were more than enough to ruin whatever comfort zone he and I had.

Lying next to him on that bed that night, all I could think of before I drifted off to sleep was how complicated things were going to become from then on. Still, a smile crept over my lips, because whatever it was that I had with Ben, it felt like a step toward moving on and finally leaving The Shade behind us.

It was wishful thinking, because the moment slumber came, the nightmares came right along with it and
The Shade was proving itself to be a force that wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon.

After the blackout, things were bound to go downhill and I knew it. The darkness began to consume me and I didn’t have enough will left to fight it, so I simply surrendered to it and let myself roll along with the free fall, waiting to hit rock bottom.

The first step down was when I decided that
Sofia was no longer my responsibility.

I asked Cameron and Yuri to meet with me right after I attacked Ashley and hit Vivienne. I was
in the music room. I kept the lights dim, my fingers playing a sad tune on the grand piano. The knights approached tentatively. Perhaps my face betrayed that I was in no mood for company.

“Find yourselves a seat and tell me what happened. How was it possible that my brother escaped from you both?” I kept playing the sorrowful melody.

Cameron took the lead and made himself comfortable on one of the cushioned benches. Yuri followed soon after. He appeared to be on edge with the way his fingers were twitching as he fumbled with them. I noted then how Yuri never seemed to be at ease when he was around me.

“Well?” I coaxed impatiently. “Speak.”

“We found Lucas at Claudia’s,” Cameron obliged. “Apparently, he’d been hiding out with her all this time. He was quick to escape. Most likely heard us coming and jumped out the window of one of the guest rooms right before we arrived.”

“I ran after him…” Yuri chimed in.

“…and Lazaroff was pretty damned fast too. Always has been.”

From my peripheral vision, I could make out Cameron glaring at Yuri, as if to tell the younger vampire to let him do all the talking. Of the three of us, Cameron was the oldest – both in natural and vampire years. He’
d shown me more reverence and respect than Yuri ever did however.

“Yuri caught up with your brother,” Cameron continued after a
short pause, “but as you may well know, Lucas overpowered him. Had I not caught up in time, the prince would’ve ripped Yuri’s heart out. When Lucas saw me coming, he made a run for it. By the time I reached the port, he’d already knocked out the guards and escaped on one of the speed boats.”

“The speed boats?” At that, I abruptly stopped playing a tune. “He didn’t take a sub
marine?”

“The subs are new and far slower than a speed boat. He wouldn’t have known how to run the submarines,” Yuri explained. “He hasn’t shown any interest in navigating the subs anyway.”

“So he went out of the island in broad daylight?” I turned on my bench so that I was facing them. “He’ll die for sure…”

“I wouldn’t bet all my marbles on it.” Cameron chuckled. “If there’s anything I admire about your brother, it’s his will to survive.”

Cameron was right. Knowing my brother, he had a plan up his sleeve that would help him survive even the sun. Not being able to argue with Cameron’s reasoning, I had to ask, “Why was Yuri there?”

“He was the one who tipped me off that Lucas was at Claudia’s.”

I eyed Yuri thoughtfully. I didn’t know why I was surprised. I just thought that after all those centuries, the strange thing Claudia and Yuri had going on between them was over. I never fully understood the dynamic of their relationship or Yuri’s blatant outward disdain, and yet seeming fascination, of Claudia.

“How exactly did you come about this information?”

Yuri gave me a response – a long-winded one, as he was inclined to do. His explanation escaped me however, because my mind quickly drifted off to Sofia’s welfare. To say that I didn’t care what happened to her was a lie. The thought of any danger befalling her sickened me. I knew that if Lucas survived – and he most likely would – he would pose a formidable threat to her life. If he wasn’t aware that Sofia was no longer at The Shade, he still had plenty of time and means to find out that Sofia was no longer under my protection.

Part of me wanted to heed to Vivienne’s coaxing to go after her, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. My ego couldn’t possibly bear the thought of traipsing around the mainland in search of some teenager.
Sofia chose to leave, knowing full well that upon leaving The Shade, she would no longer be under my protection. If Lucas went after her, that was her cross to bear. Not mine. She ceased to become my obligation the moment she chose to escape.