B00DW1DUQA EBOK (46 page)

‘Let’s give Shireen one more day. Then we’ll try it.’

‘OK.’

The following day, Nathaniel returned to the subject of Connor’s father. It was something that clearly fascinated him.

‘So, this Baron. He tells people what to do?’

‘Not really,’ said Finn. ‘It’s just an old title. It doesn’t mean much any more.’

‘But someone must be in charge. Someone must give the orders.’

‘No. It’s not like that. Nobody’s in charge.’

Finn’s words seemed to trouble and fascinate Nathaniel in equal measure. He paused for thought. ‘But somebody has to control everything. Like here in Engn with the Directory and the masters. Otherwise it would be chaos.’

Finn shrugged. ‘No, everything works OK. Sometimes people gather at the Moot Hall to decide things, but that’s all.’

‘I see. And tell me, do you think this is a better system than the one here?’

Finn hesitated. He could see where this was going. Nathaniel clearly thought these supposed fantasies were dangerous; the result of a desire to destroy Engn perhaps. He had to be careful. ‘No, I … it’s just different.’

Nathaniel regarded him in silence for several moments. He looked unhappy, as if Finn had disappointed him. Finally he returned to his notes, filling several more pages while Finn and Diane sat there in silence.

That evening, it was Matilda and not Shireen who came with their medicine once again. They both became more worried still, convinced their plot had been uncovered. Perhaps Shireen was being held somewhere, grilled, interrogated. They began to talk about spending three hour shifts up at the top of the spire, watching for Connor. Perhaps they could claim to be ill during the day then sneak away to spend some time up there. They went to sleep with nothing decided. Despite the medicine, Finn slept less well, waking repeatedly, his stomach fizzing with anxiety.

The following day, when they arrived for the day’s interview, Nathaniel stood with his back to them, looking out of the window. Finn and Diane sat down but Nathaniel didn’t move.

‘Is there anything wrong?’ asked Diane.

Nathaniel turned to look at the two of them. He looked tired, as if he hadn’t slept well, either. ‘In truth I’m worried I may not be able to help you,’ he said. ‘Your delusions are so deep-seated, so detailed. It may be that I can’t return you to full health.’

‘And what happens then?’ asked Finn.

‘It has happened on occasion,’ said Nathaniel. ‘In the end it becomes too dangerous to have such people around. For everyone else I mean. I’m sure you understand.’

Finn glanced at Diane. They could both see where this was going. They had to do something. They needed to stay in the Directory, not be thrown back into the mines. Or worse. ‘But we are making progress,’ said Finn. ‘Truly. Telling you all these stories has helped me … understand them. Put them in perspective.’

Nathaniel’s brow creased as he considered Finn’s words. ‘So you begin to accept these are just stories?’

‘You must have had similar fantasies yourself,’ said Diane. ‘Everyone must. Dreams of impossible worlds and imaginary lands.’

Nathaniel regarded her with something like alarm, as if Diane had touched a raw nerve. Who would he go to, Finn wondered, to discuss such things?

‘Of course, everyone has idle dreams,’ said Nathaniel. ‘It’s perfectly normal.’

‘Talking to you is certainly helping us understand that,’ said Finn, choosing his words carefully.

‘It is?’

Finn nodded. ‘Definitely.’ He glanced at Diane, prompting her. She nodded too.

Nathaniel let out a sigh of air. ‘Well, that’s good. Let us proceed then.’ He strode over to his chair and picked up his sheaf of paper, ready to begin the day’s questions.

That evening, finally, it was Shireen who came to them with their sleeping draughts. She looked calm, smiling as she pushed back the cowl on her hood. All Finn’s gnawing fears for her melted away.

I’m sorry,’ she said. ‘I came as soon as I could.’

‘What do you do here anyway?’ he asked. ‘What is an
Executive
?’

‘I simply execute various functions here. Helping Nathaniel is one such duty.’

‘So Nathaniel isn’t the Director?’ asked Diane.

‘No, no. He’s in charge of the sanatorium, nothing more. That’s why he’s so fascinated with you two. There’s actually no-one else here.’

‘We noticed,’ said Diane. ‘Why is that?’

‘It was busy once, when a lot people came in from outside – from Engn I mean – but these days that doesn’t happen much. So much of the machine is automated now.’

‘Connor got in,’ said Finn.

‘He did. Being his mother’s son helps, as I say. I think he was picked out to come here a long time ago. Chosen as a candidate because the existing Director is so old.’

‘So Connor is in the Directory? You’ve met him?’

‘No. I mean, I haven’t met him. I only know he’s here because I heard it over the grapevine, as you did.’

‘Then you have a line-of-sight?’ said Diane. ‘How can that be when no-one believes the outside world even exists?’

‘Our line-of-sight is only used to relay instructions to other parts of Engn. It’s not connected to the outside world. But sometimes we get news that way. Then things get passed around on the grapevine. Word of mouth. Whispered messages as people brush by each other.’

‘So what do you know about Connor?’ asked Finn.

‘That secretly, despite everything, he’s supposed to be one of us. Although others doubt this and are wary of him.’

‘Mrs. Megrim said we had to find him. Do you know where he might be?’

Shireen frowned and didn’t speak for a moment. ‘Before we talk about that I need to know more about him. I don’t remember him from back home; he was too young. I’ve never spoken to him. The question is, can we really trust him? You both knew him better.’

Finn glanced at Diane, who met his look with troubled eyes. She still had doubts about Connor, he knew. She’d come because he’d asked her to, perhaps for no other reason.

Shireen saw the uncertainty between them. ‘You’re not convinced about him, are you, Diane? We have to be absolutely sure before we make a move. There will be no going back, no second chance. Connor is an important man now. One word from him and it will be the end for all of us.’

Finn sighed, rehearsing in his mind all the arguments he’d had with himself about his boyhood friend. All the episodes from their life he’d run through in his mind again and again. Sometimes he found himself asking questions of Connor, the younger Connor in his mind, seeking reassurances. Going over details. Just like Nathaniel in a strange way.

‘I believe in him,’ said Finn. ‘I do. Look what I’ve been through. Despite all that I still believe in him. We were friends and we agreed to destroy Engn. I’m sure that is still his intention.’

Shireen stared into his eyes, as if trying to gauge the truth of his words. ‘And if he’s changed? Grown up, become part of the machine?’

Finn shrugged. ‘I don’t believe it. But if he has then it was all meaningless anyway. Everything that’s happened. None of it will matter.’

Shireen stood up and walked across the room to the little window. She stared out, deep in thought. Did he really have such confidence in his old friend? It sounded so convincing when he said it out loud. In his mind it was nowhere near so simple. What must it be like for Diane, who barely knew Connor, and Shireen, who had most to lose and who’d never even spoken to him?

‘You don’t have to be involved, Shireen,’ said Finn. ‘I understand. Help us find him and we’ll do the rest.’

She turned and smiled at his words. ‘Ah, Finn, I’ve missed you so much. You were always a serious little boy. If you made a solemn promise to do something you did it, even if it took you all day. In some ways you haven’t changed a bit.’

‘So what are you going to do?’ he asked.

Shireen looked at Diane. ‘What do you think? You’re somewhere between us in all this. You have the perspective of distance. Is this childish madness? You two could escape, slip back down the tunnel and I could go back to my life. With a bit of luck we might all survive into old age.’

Diane glanced between them. Finn could see the replies forming in her mind, all her doubts and hopes. This was the turning-point. If Diane said
no
now they would have to leave, have to try and survive outside Engn. Everything would go back to how it was. He didn’t speak, didn’t want to say anything that might encourage or discourage her.

Diane sighed. ‘I came this far. This may be the only chance anyone will ever get. I don’t really trust Connor, it’s true. I don’t know him, not now. But I do trust Finn and we did make a promise. I’m with him.’

‘Very well,’ said Shireen. ‘Then so am I.’

Finn realised he’d been holding his breath. He exhaled, looking at both of them. He wanted to hug them both.

‘We must still be very careful,’ said Shireen. ‘Nathaniel may seem easy-going but anything out of place will make him suspicious. He thinks you’re harmless and deluded. If he thought you were a threat things would be very different. You must carry on as before until it’s time to act. Do you understand?’

‘Can’t you talk to him?’ asked Diane. ‘I’m sure he has feelings for you, too. Can’t you make him see the truth?’

‘I’ve wanted to, often,’ said Shireen. ‘Believe me. And he would listen to me, I know. But I don’t want to give him that dilemma. Of having to treat me or banish me.’

‘Do you know where Connor might be?’ asked Diane. ‘Can you get us to him?’

‘I think I do,’ said Shireen. ‘That’s part of the reason I haven’t been here. I’ve been looking around and listening.’

‘And?’

‘The whispers are quite clear. He was a master of the Inner Wheel before the Director himself recruited him as his apprentice.’

‘So Connor is in the one place he can really organize things, change things. That must have been his plan all along. Be like them, be one of them.’

‘I hope so,’ said Shireen.

‘How do we find him?’ asked Diane.

‘In the middle of the Directory is a square stone building. They say that’s where the Director operates.’

‘OK. So Connor must be in there,’ said Finn.

‘The problem is, the building has no doors or windows. No-one knows how he comes and goes. Secret tunnels, I suppose. I’ll try and find out.’

‘But if you’re caught,’ said Finn.

‘There’s no other way. It seems the point of everything has been to get the two of you to Connor.’

‘So what should we do?’ asked Diane.

‘What you’ve been doing. Don’t attract suspicion and I’ll find out what I can. OK?’

‘OK.’

At the door, Finn and his sister hugged each other again.

‘Be careful,’ said Finn.

‘And you.’

Shireen didn’t return the next evening, and once again they began to worry things had gone wrong. Diane became more and more subdued. They ambled through the familiar daily routine, trying not to look anxious or alarmed.

The following day, strong winds sent heavy rain slashing diagonally across the world outside. They sat with the windows shut, raindrops dashing against the glass like handfuls of rice. Nathaniel seemed subdued, too. Worried about something. He fidgeted constantly with the stud in his ear.

‘Now,’ he said, ‘you told me you had a sister back in your former home, Finn.’ He leafed back through his notes. ‘Shireen. Is that correct?’

‘Yes.’ Alarm thudded through Finn. He tried to look relaxed. He didn’t dare glance across at Diane.

‘Can you tell me what happened to her?’ asked Nathaniel. ‘You didn’t mention her in any of your later adventures.’

He thought about what he should say. He didn’t know how much Nathaniel already knew. He could only think to tell the truth. ‘She was taken, too. When I was very small. The Ironclads came for her and took her to Engn.’

‘That must have been very upsetting.’

‘I suppose. I was very young.’

‘And, of course, she never returned to the valley. Do you know what became of her?’

‘No,’ said Finn. ‘I’ve never seen her. I don’t think I’d recognize her now.’

He regretted saying that even as he spoke. It sounded too much like an attempt to justify his lie. He felt his face redden slightly. Nathaniel paused for a moment, regarding Finn, then began to scribble away.

‘But she must still be here somewhere?’ he said when he’d finished writing.

‘I suppose so.’

‘Perhaps we should try and track her down. See … what she remembers of those old days, back outside.’

‘Yes. We could try.’

‘If I may say so, Finn, you seem very reluctant about this. I would have thought you’d jump at the chance.’

‘Yes. I would. It’s just, if she is still alive, she might not even remember me.’

‘Ah. Perhaps so.’ Nathaniel scribbled again, several long sentences. Finn waited, anxiety fizzing within him. Did Nathaniel know Shireen’s true identity?

‘And tell me,’ said Nathaniel at last. ‘Was anyone else from your old home brought here? Apart from yourself, Shireen and Diane?’

Finn tried to recall what he’d said in their previous sessions. Had he ever even mentioned Connor? He had to be careful. Nathaniel could spot inconsistencies by checking back on his notes.

‘No-one I can think of,’ said Finn.

‘No-one at all?’

‘No.’

‘I see.’

More scribbling. Nathaniel turned the sheet over and continued to write. Finn glanced at Diane. Her face was taut with worry. Nathaniel finished writing, looked back up at them and smiled. ‘Very well. Interesting, interesting. I think that’s enough for today, yes? We’ll resume tomorrow.’

Nathaniel stood to lead them to the dining hall. This time, two cowled figures accompanied them. They stood guard by the doors as Finn and Diane ate in silence.

Back in their rooms they whispered through the grilles.

‘He knows, doesn’t he?’ whispered Finn. ‘About Shireen. I know he does.’

‘Perhaps he was just seeing how much you’d make up,’ said Diane. ‘I mean, he can’t know everything since he doesn’t believe there is a valley outside Engn.’

‘No. But he might know Shireen is my sister. What’s he going to do, question her? He might uncover all
her
delusions then.’