Baby, Oh Baby! (32 page)

Jake squeezed his eyes shut and muttered a low curse. If there was one thing he hated, it was being out of control, and he'd definitely been that last night. He'd made love to Annie not just once, but three separate times. And if she'd been beside him in bed this morning, he'd no doubt have done it again. Hell, he had an erection right now just thinking about it.

Mumbling another oath, Jake threw back the covers, rose from the bed, and searched for his clothes. He located his slacks and underwear on the floor and quickly scrambled into them. Damage control was always most effective when it was launched immediately after a mistake, and last night had definitely been a mistake.

Annie was his complete opposite. Opposites might attract, but they didn't make for good lifelong partners—anyone with a lick of commonsense knew that. The reason he and Rachel had gotten along so well was because they'd been so alike in so many ways. Their temperaments, ideology, approach to problem-solving—all of the important stuff—had been practically identical. He and Annie shared none of those things. They had no hope for a viable marriage, and neither one of them was the type for a casual sexual relationship.

He'd screwed up, big time. He needed to talk to Annie and set things straight as soon as possible.

Pulling his pants on with some frustration, he headed across the room for his shirt, which had somehow landed against the opposite wall. Donning it, he started down the hall, only to be stopped by a cheerful cooing coming from Madeline's room.

"Ah ah ah ah."

He peered in the doorway and found the baby lying on her back in her crib, pulling on her toes, musically crooning to the ceiling.

Madeline's cheeks puffed out in an enormous grin as• she spotted him. Scrambling to her chubby feet, she grabbed the crib railing and did a couple of deep knee bends. "Ink! Ink!"

Jake grinned and walked to the side of the crib. "Good morning, sweetheart."

"Good morning, yourself," called a feminine voice behind him.

Jake whipped around to see Annie leaning against the wall, wearing a short pink robe and a smile. Her hair was a tousled mass of red curls, and her eyes were bright and blue.

A surge of interest shot through him. He tried to tamp it down. "Hi."

"Hi. Did you sleep well?" she asked.

Sleep was not the most memorable part of his eve ning. He cautiously nodded, afraid to commit to any thing. "You?"

She raised her arms in a sensuous stretch. "Wonderfully, until the puppy decided it was time to begin the day."

Jake knit his forehead in a frown. "Oh, hey—I meant to get up with her. Sorry . you had to."

"It's okay. Madeline has me accustomed to early mornings."

"Ooh ah," the baby agreed, gripping the railing and bouncing on the mattress.

The corners of Annie's eyes crinkled sexily as she smiled. "Besides, you looked like you needed some sleep. Especially after that last little interlude at three-thirty."

Jake swallowed hard. "Annie ... we need to talk."

Her smile rapidly evaporated. "Uh-oh." She folded her arms protectively across her chest. "Whenever people say `we need to talk,' they never mean about anything pleasant."

Hell. He hadn't even said anything, and he'd already hurt her.

Madeline's bouncing grew more agitated. Her mother quickly strode to the crib and lifted the child out. "Annie ..." Jake began.

She cut him off, her voice thick. "Not right now, Jake, okay? Madeline needs a dry diaper, and I need some coffee. Why don't you go make us a pot? You and I can talk while Madeline plays with the puppy." Her back was toward him as she carried the baby to the changing table, but he caught a brief glimpse of her profile, long enough to detect the glimmer of something that looked Suspiciously like a tear on her cheek.

Annie's heart was heavy as she followed a gleeful Madeline and a rowdy puppy out to the patio fifteen minutes Iater. Jake was right behind her, carrying two •• mugs of coffee.

It was a beautiful July morning—painfully so. The sun shone in a brilliant blue sky, songbirds tweeted on every branch, and the honeysuckle climbing the backyard fence filled the air with a lush, heady scent. It had started out as a perfect day. When she'd awakened and felt Jake curled beside her on the bed, her heart had been dancing on tiptoe, pirouetting in the air.

And then Jake had said, "We need to talk," and her joy had crashed to the ground like a duck with a shattered wing.

Holding her spine rigid, Annie walked past the porch swing to the wrought iron patio and sat .under the large green-and-white striped umbrella as Madeline merrily chased the dog across the lawn. Jake set a mug of coffee before her, then lowered himself into the adjacent chair..;

Annie took a sip and closed her eyes. For one last moment, she pretended that everything was the way it had seemed when she'd awakened—that she and Jake were not just married, but really husband and wife. That they were lovers, in love. That they were a family, with no end in sight.

Jake cleared his throat. "Madeline seems to like the puppy"

Annie opened her eyes and nodded. "She loves him."

"I'm glad it worked out." Jake looked at her, then quickly looked away. His dark eyes were troubled. He was having a hard time saying whatever it was he had to say.

Annie decided to help him out. `But we're not going to work out. Is that what you're trying to say?”

Jake kept his eyes on the iron mesh tabletop. "Annie..."

"You've got a case of buyer's remorse."

Jake's gaze jerked up quizzically. "What?"

"Buyer's remorse. After making a big purchase, sometimes people feel like they've made the wrong decision. Especially if they made the purchase impulsively. You've got buyer's remorse about last night."

"Jeeze, Annie—you make it sound like I bought a leaky boat!"

She forced a smile. "I'll bet you wish that's all you'd done."    >

Jake's mouth twisted into a rueful grin.

"Do you feel like you're cheating on Rachel?" she asked softly.

Jake avoided the question. "I didn't mean for things to get so out of hand." He ran a hand through his hair and blew out a harsh breath of air. "Look—I really like you. And I'm attracted to you like crazy. Last night was incredible. But. .

"But I'm not Rachel."

Annie's soft words hung in the air. Jake stared into his coffee. The only sound was the nearby squeal of -Madeline and the distant caw of a bluejay.

He ran a hand through his hair and looked up, his ryes dark. "You and I, we're just too damned different, Annie. Too different for things to work out for very long”

"Different isn't necessarily bad. Not physically, anyway”

The corners of Jake's mouth quirked up, but the smile as short-lived. He fiddled with the handle of his mug. “Annie, there's more than just you and me involved here. There's a child who needs stable parents in a stable relationship. In the long run, things like similar beliefs d compatible goals are what hold couples together. We don't have that stuff going for us. We just have ...”

"Sex." Annie supplied softly. "Hot, lusty, incredible sex"

She saw his throat move as he swallowed. "It
was
incredible."

"And hot."

"Very hot." His voice was an octave lower than normal.

Their eyes locked, and for a moment, Annie thought he was about to haul her into his arms and kiss her. And then the puppy darted by and Madeline dashed after him.

"Aw Dah!" she called.

Jake's eyes followed the toddler as she headed back across the lawn. He blew out .a hard sigh. "If we continue down this road, Annie, we're going to end up hurt- `

 each other. And if we hurt each other, well, it's almost inevitable that we'll hurt Madeline, too."

Annie sat very still. If she didn't move, maybe she could hold back the pain.

She knew he was right. It had hurt her immensely, having parents who argued and fought and tried to wound each other. -,

"I think we need to stick with our original agreement." he said. "I think we need to go back to having a platonic relationship."

Annie forced a smile she didn't feel. "That's going to' be awfully difficult, now that I know what you look like naked."

Jake looked at her longingly. "Not half as difficult as it'll be for me, Annie. Every time I look at you, I ..." He stopped himself and shook his head.

"What?"

His mouth turned up in a rueful, sexy smile. "If we want to have a platonic relationship, I'd better not tell you."

"Who said that was what we want?"

Jake's eyes were pleading. "Annie ... don't make this any harder than it is."

Annie turned her hands palm up on the table. "So what do you suggest we do? Pretend that last night never happened?"

"Yes."

Annie shot him a skeptical look.

"The way I figure it," he continued, "it'll be easier to stop things now than to continue on and get all emotionally involved."

Too late, Annie thought silently.

Jake drained his mug, then rose to his feet. "I'm going to get another cup of coffee. Would you like one?"

Annie shook her head. What she wanted was another night like last night, and another hour like the one when she'd first awakened this morning—an hour when her future with Jake seemed to stretch on indefinitely, when life held joy and promise, when love finally, finally seemed to have arrived.

"I've never had my fortune told," Susanna told Annie four weeks later as she leaned against the counter in Annie's kitchen. The older woman had driven over from Tulsa and played with Madeline that morning, then treated Annie and Madeline to lunch at the Cowbell Cafe. In return, Annie had offered to read her fortune while the baby took an afternoon nap.

Annie set the kettle on the burner and smiled. "In that case, I'm going to use Granny's special blend—one she kept for special readings."

Annie headed to the old apothecary case in the living room, rose on tiptoe, and slid her hand along the top of the old piece of furniture. Her fingers closed around a rusty key. She used it to open the hinged glass doors and pulled out an enormous tin box from the very back.

"This is very old and stale, so I'm afraid it doesn't have the best flavor," Annie said. `But Granny swore it was the best tea for readings. It's called `China Seer.' "

"China Seer," Susanna echoed. "What a romantic name."

The two women traipsed back to the kitchen. Annie carefully pried the lid off the tea container and placed a heaping serving in the teacup. When the teapot whistled, she poured in the steaming water, then crossed the room and retrieved a small piece of ice from the freezer.

"That'll help the tea leaves settle at the bottom," she said, dropping in the ice. She carefully carried the cup to the breakfast table and set it in front of Susanna. "There. Now drink it down until there's nothing left but about a teaspoon of liquid."

Susanna took a sip. "Do you read your own fortune every morning?"

"Oh, no. Gran said the gift is only to be used for others—never for selfish reasons, and never for money. She said it's impossible to accurately read your own fortune."

Susanna took a deeper drink. "But you read Jake's. Since you two are married now, your fortunes should be the same."

"Not necessarily." To her dismay, Annie's voice cracked on the last syllable.

Susanna leaned forward and placed her hand on Annie's. "Annie, dear—is everything okay between you two?"

"Yes." The concern in Susanna's gaze was so warm and genuine that tears formed in Annie's eyes. "No."

Susanna gently patted Annie's hand with her own. "If you don't want to talk, I'll certainly understand. But if you do, well, I'm a good listener, and I know how to keep a confidence."

Annie blinked back a tear. "Jake doesn't want Tom to know any details about our marriage, and I don't want to ask you to keep a secret from your husband."

Susanna smiled sadly. "Tom and I seem to have gotten very good at keeping secrets from each other lately."

Annie looked up questioningly. The other woman patted her hand again. "If you need a friendly ear, I'm here for you. And you can rest assured that nothing you tell me will be repeated to anyone."

The urge to talk to someone had been building like steam in a teakettle. Susanna's sympathetic offer made it all come boiling out. "Oh, Susanna—I'm falling in love with him!"

"And that's bad?"

Annie nodded miserably. "We got married to simplify Madeline's life and quiet down the small-town gossips and give us all the same last name. We agreed to stay married for five months. It's supposed to be platonic, but ..."

"You're for falling for Jake." She squeezed Annie's hand and gave her a consoling smile.

Annie nodded, rubbing away a tear. "And he's still in love with Rachel."

"That doesn't mean he can't love you, too. The human heart has an enormous capacity for love."

"Do you think so?"

"Oh, yes. Look around—you see it all the time. Why, my great-aunt was married . for thirty years. When my uncle died, she was certain she'd never love again. But about a year later, she remarried, and she and her new husband had twenty wonderful years together." Susanna gazed down : the teacup, as if she were seeking inspiration. When she looked up, her eyes were bright. "Maybe what you and Jake need is a change of pace. I'll keep Madeline for a weekend, and give you a chance to be alone together, as a couple."

Annie shook her head. "Jake says we should avoid being alone together."

"That's a good sign. That means he finds you hard to resist." Susanna grinned and took a long draught of tea. "Leave it all to me. I'll find a way to corner him into it."

A seed of hope took root in Annie's heart. Maybe, just maybe, there was a chance. It frightened her, how intensely she hoped it was true. She squeezed Susanna's hand. "Thank you."

"Don't mention it. It's in my best interests to keep you two together to make sure that grandbaby stays nearby." She took another sip of tea, then peered over the rim of the cup. "You don't mind if I think of Madeline as a grandchild, do you?"

"I'm honored," Annie answered honestly. "Madeline is fortunate to have you in her life." She smiled softly. at Susanna. "I am, too."