Bachelor Auction (38 page)

didn’t want to discuss his feelings for Charlotte with

anyone. Certainly not with a petulant child who had

added to the mess he created.

“You are. You’re in love with Charlotte. All this

time, I thought you were just—but you really...” Her

lower lip began to tremble, and a tear spilled down

her cheek. She looked down at her lap. “This is so

unfair. I love you, Marcus. I have since I was fifteen.

I’ve been waiting for you to see that I’m grown up.”

“I’m sorry, Nat. You’re sweet, but—”

“But you don’t love me.”

“No. I care for you, like a kid sister. Even if I

didn’t love Charlotte...” He trailed off when she burst

into tears and searched the console for a tissue. He

found a napkin from the last fast food place he’d

driven through, and with a sigh, put the truck in

gear before his conscience overrode common sense

and he did something stupid. Like try to comfort her.

As much as he hated to see her cry, she would

probably take it as a sign that he cared more than he

did. Besides, a good cry would help her heal—not to

mention keep her quiet. He needed to think.

But his thoughts were a jumble, and clearly,

Natalie had more to say. She laid a hand on his arm

resting on the console. “She doesn’t know, does she?”

He thought back to the minutes following their

lovemaking. He’d come near telling her, thought she

might have guessed, but he hadn’t actually said the

words. “No.”

“I didn’t think so.”

Something about the way she said it, the way

her voice cracked with shame, made him look at her.

“What do you mean?”

She darted a quick glance at him, guilt and

remorse shifting back and forth around the hurt in

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her big brown eyes. She opened her mouth as if to

explain, then wedged her lower lip between her

teeth.

“Nat?”

“I can’t believe I’m telling you this, but I think

she loves you, too.” He thought he would have to

prompt her again, but she shook her head and

rushed on. “She gave up too easily. From all I’d

heard about Charlotte, I’d expected her to be a

vindictive bitch, to sink her claws into you and not

let go no matter who she hurt, you or me. But

instead,
I
was the bitch. I wanted her to leave you

alone so I let her believe you had feelings for me,

that your attraction to her was holding you back.”

Sniffling, she turned away. “You must hate me.

I don’t even like myself right now.”

Marcus gripped the steering wheel with both

hands and hung onto his patience by a thin thread,

afraid she’d start to cry again and never tell him

what he needed to know. Like why she thought

Charlotte loved him. He prayed she was right. “I

don’t hate you, Nat.”

“It’s just that I—I do want you to be happy.

That’s what she said, you know. You deserved to be

happy and to make sure you were. I thought that’s

what I was doing—would do if you gave me the

chance. Anyway, she obviously cares enough about

you to do what she thought—or what I led her to

believe—was best for you. I’m so sorry, Marcus.

Maybe it’s not too late.”

“Maybe.” But if it was, he had no one to blame

but himself. He’d been cocky enough to think he

could

control

everything—a

teenage

girl’s

infatuation, his attraction to Charlotte, his dick.

Well, he’d done about as well controlling those as he

had his heart.

But right now it wasn’t
his
heart he was

concerned about. Charlotte might not love him,

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might not care if he loved her, but she had to be

hurting after the things Natalie said. He had to find

her. He had to make things right.

Luckily, he knew exactly where she would be at

seven o’clock on Christmas Eve, the night of

miracles.

A little angel had told him.

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Arms loaded with colorfully wrapped gifts,

Charlotte backed up to the double doors of the burn

unit’s game room. She sniffled, remnants of the last

breakdown she’d had since leaving Marcus at the

church, and sucked in a steadying breath. She

couldn’t start blubbering in front of the children and

upset them.

Butting her way inside, she heard the pitter

patter of slippered feet and Sarah’s sweet voice.

“Charlotte, you came.”

“Of course, honey. I promised didn’t I?” She

surveyed the room, taking a head count to make

sure she had enough gifts for everyone. “Did Dylan

go home?”

“Yeah, today.”

Good
. Children needed to be home with their

families at Christmas. She’d take his present to him

later in the week.

Squatting at the base of the tree, she lowered

her burden to the floor as several children, excited at

her arrival and the new haul, ran over to

investigate. She looked around for the smallest and

most precocious of the bunch. “What about Amy?”

“Oh, she’s here somewhere.” Sarah danced

beside her. “I can’t wait to show you what I got this

morning.”

Charlotte smiled at Sarah’s excitement and felt

a little of her depression lift. This place—these

children—could always do that, make her forget the

world outside. “Oh, did Santa come early?”

“You could say that.”

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Bachelor Auction

She looked up to see the girl’s face lit with

humor. Brushing the dust off the knees of her jeans,

she straightened and slipped out of her hip-length,

black leather jacket. “Okay, I give. What’s up?”

Sarah took her jacket and draped it over the

chair behind her. “We had a visitor after breakfast.”

“Yes, I’ve already got that much. Who was it?”

“Marcus.” Sarah beamed. “And look what he

gave me.”

Charlotte flinched at the sound of his name and

suddenly wished she hadn’t worn her hair in a

ponytail. It left her flushed skin too exposed, even

above the turtleneck that peeked from under her

sweatshirt. Her gaze followed Sarah’s fingers as they

ran over the purple tie-dyed scarf tied neatly around

her throat. The very scarf she’d thought he bought

for Natalie.

“It covers my scar.”

“It’s beautiful.”

“He said you helped him pick it out.”

“Yes.” Something fluttered inside Charlotte,

knowing he spoke of her to the children. Then again,

he could have been using her relationship with them

to ease the way into creating one of his own. Either

way, she was relieved the gift she had helped him

choose wasn’t for another woman.

“Charlotte!”

Amy’s squeal from behind yanked her from the

edge of another attack of self-pity. She turned to

greet her favorite imp and stopped in her tracks

when her gaze, leveled for the tiny five year old,

landed on a pair of very masculine, jean-clad thighs.

Following them upward, she took in slender hips

and a trim waist that expanded into a broad chest

covered in a dark green cashmere sweater. Little

legs covered in pink thermal pajama pants dangled

over wide shoulders.

Unable to breathe for the tightness squeezing

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Darah Lace

her lungs, Charlotte blinked past the face she knew

so well to Amy’s, peering at her over waves of jet

black hair. “See what Marcus gave me. A snow globe.

It has a little town in it.”

“H—how pretty.” That he’d been thinking of the

children while on their trip was another reminder of

the kind of man he was. And that she had ruined

any chance of happiness with him. That she’d never

really had a chance.

“I hope you don’t mind me barging in.”

Forced to acknowledge him, she took a direct hit

to her heart. Geez, it hurt to look at him. “Of course

not. The children seem to have formed an

attachment to you. And it was thoughtful of you to

bring gifts. Where’s Natalie?”

If the floor opened up to swallow her, she would

have rejoiced. It was the last thing she had meant to

ask. Now she sounded like a jealous ex-lover, exactly

what she was.

He shrugged, making Amy giggle, then lowered

her to her feet. “I don’t know. I dropped her off at the

ranch and headed back here. Didn’t want to miss the

fun.”

Fun? He called this fun? Every nerve in her

body ached with the need to touch him, to feel the

warmth of
his
touch.

Sarah tugged on her arm. “He brought

something else, too. The doctors and nurses have

been having fun with it all day.”

Both the girls began to titter and point above

her head. She glanced up and saw a sprig of

mistletoe tied to a ceiling beam with red ribbon.

“You gotta kiss her, Marcus.”

Charlotte jerked around to find Amy and Sarah

pushing him toward her. Shaking her head, she

started to back away, but his hands slid up her arms

to rest on her shoulders. He leaned close to whisper.

“For the kids.”

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Bachelor Auction

She wanted his kiss, wanted it more than

anything. But she’d made a promise to herself that

she would think of him and what he needed. “I don’t

think we...”

“Then quit thinking,” he murmured as his head

drifted toward hers. There it was, the same raw

hunger in his eyes she’d seen so many times before.

But there were other things now, a gentle

understanding, a questioning hope, a profound

longing.

She closed her eyes, certain her own longings

were playing tricks on her, and ducked from under

his hands. “I left something in the car.” She started

walking backward, toward the exit. “Sarah, you start

passing out the presents.”

“Charlotte, wait.”

His voice followed her into the hall, and she

quickened her pace almost to a run. Several nurses

looked up as she passed their station, but she didn’t

care. She could feel the tears welling up and had to

make it to the elevator before the dam broke.

He caught her half way down the hall and

matched his stride to hers. “I’ll come with you.”

“There’s not that much.” Actually there were no

gifts in the car. And as much as she hated to lie to

the kids, she wasn’t coming back tonight. Not while

Marcus was here.

“I need to talk to you anyway. There are some

things I should explain.”

“You don’t have to. I get it now. I—” To her

horror, her voice cracked then wouldn’t budge past

her throat as the first of her tears tipped over her

bottom lashes.

“Oh God, Charlotte, please don’t cry.”

Swiping the back of her hand over wet cheeks,

she lifted her chin away from him and sniffed. “I’m

not.” Not really. This was nothing compared to what

she wanted to do. Would do later when she was by

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Darah Lace

herself.

He stepped in front of her, putting his hands on

her upper arms when she tried to go around him.

“Then stop running away.”

“I’m not,” she repeated the same feeble words,

unable to think beyond her need for escape.

“You’re not crying and you’re not running?” He

shook his head. “You used to be a better liar than

that.” She tried to pull away, but he wouldn’t let her.

“Not this time.”

Hysteria bubbled inside her, and she could feel

herself losing the thin grasp she had on her

emotions. “What do you want from me, Marcus?”

“I’ll answer that later. For now—” Marcus

moved her to one side of the hall as two nurses

approached with obvious curiosity and waited for

them to pass. “For now, I want to start by saying I’m

sorry.”

“No,
I’m
sorry. For everything. If I’d known—”

Her voice broke again and shame dragged her gaze

to the wall behind him.

“Shh, it’s okay.”

“No, it’s not. I made a game out of trying to

seduce you. When I couldn’t win fairly, I cheated.

And now...”

“And now?” he prompted.

She inhaled deeply and exhaled, struggling for

composure. “You won. No matter what happened.”