Backward (28 page)

H
ARRY
PICKED
up the phone on the first ring.

“Bull, is everything okay?” Harry sat in the living room, watching television while Tristan slept upstairs. He’d quickly run out of steam, and Harry had helped him between the covers. He’d stayed with him until Tristan had fallen asleep.

“It’s fine. It’s a Monday and slow. We have good people, and they can handle the place for tonight while we try to get some rest. How is Tristan doing?”

“Calm for now, but he’s going to need some help, I think.”

“We can get him whatever he needs. But at first the most important thing is going to be time and someone to listen, and there’s no one better at that than you. So be there with him.” Bull paused. “Get some rest too. You’ve been up for God knows how long. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Bull said good-bye, and Harry hung up.

Tristan padded into the room and sat down next to him. “You were gone, and I thought I was…. Then Butterscotch began pigging the bed and… I’m getting used to her, I think, but I don’t know how I feel about her climbing all over me and licking my ears. I keep thinking she’s tasting me for later.” Tristan seemed to be forcing a light tone in his voice. “But I guess after… well… the other stuff, I can learn to deal with a cat. By comparison, she isn’t so bad.” Tristan shifted closer. “So why aren’t you in bed? I need you to protect me from the beast.”

Harry wrapped his arm around Tristan and tugged him close. “I was just thinking too much and couldn’t sleep.”

“What about?” Tristan asked.

“It really isn’t important. Not right now.” Harry kissed Tristan’s forehead and let out a small sigh.

“Did I do something wrong?” Tristan asked.

“Of course not,” Harry answered quickly. “It’s… well, there’s something I want to ask, but I know it’s not the right time. I just like having you here, and I don’t want you to go back to living at your apartment.”

Tristan nodded. “I like it here too, but I can’t….” Tristan humphed. “It’s too soon. I rushed into things with Eddie, and look how that turned out. We’ve gotten close in the last week, and I like how things are with you. But I don’t want to rush in and make a mistake.”

“Like I said, it isn’t what’s most important right now. I shouldn’t even have brought it up.” He knew it was the wrong thing to do, but it still hurt that Tristan had turned him down. He should have simply kept his mouth shut and not said a word. Yeah, he didn’t want Tristan to go back to his apartment, but maybe he was being selfish and wanted Tristan here for the wrong reasons. They had spent a week together, almost in each other’s back pockets, and he liked it.

“Harry. I know what you’re thinking. We’ve had a traumatic week with all the crap that’s happened. What if it’s just that? A reaction to all of that? I looked to you for help, and you’ve been there the entire time. But what if that’s all there is, and now that it’s all over, we find out we don’t have anything in common, or….” Tristan bit his lower lip.

Harry tugged Tristan closer. “I nearly lost you….”

“Yeah, and I kept thinking of you while I was locked in that room. I actually prayed on the wind that you’d find me.” Tristan met his gaze. “I love you too, Harry, I really do. But I think we both need to make sure this is real.”

“So what are you saying?”

“That I want to go out on dates like real people, talk on the phone, get all mushy, go places, and then we can move in together when we’re sure.”

“And how long do you think that will be?”

“I don’t know. We’ll know when it’s right.” Tristan kissed him. “I’m not turning you down—I’m asking you to wait. Is that okay?” He held still, and his warm breath ghosted over Harry’s lips. “I do love you, Harry, and I hope I didn’t hurt you.”

“You didn’t. But living with me or not, I don’t intend to stop looking out for you and caring for you.” He had almost said that he had no intention of letting Tristan go, but that might have sounded a little too possessive, and while he was feeling quite protective and, yes, a little possessive of Tristan, the last thing he wanted was to remind Tristan of Eddie and what he’d gone through. “I want you to be able to trust me, and I can see that will take time.”

“Is that something you’re willing to take?”

“Babe, I’m willing to take all the time you need.” Harry pulled Tristan to him, holding him tightly. He was in his arms, safe, and Harry breathed a sigh of relief. He’d watched Tristan for a long time, and now that he had him in his life, he wanted to make sure he stayed. And if the price was spending the time to get to know each other better, he was happily willing to do that. “Let’s get into bed so I can hold you, make love to you.” Tristan nodded, his eyes filling with heat.

“A
RE
YOU
sure you heard the message right?’ Tristan asked as he hurried up the walk to the front of Harry’s house, phone pressed to his ear.

“Yes, I’m sure,” he heard Harry say with a slight laugh. The front door opened, and Harry stepped out. He hung up, and Tristan shoved his phone in his pocket. “We need to leave in ten minutes.” Harry definitely sounded nervous.

“Did they say what they wanted? Or why they called you?”

“Nope,” Harry answered. “They just asked if we could come over this evening.”

Tristan shook his head and stepped into the house. Harry closed the door, and they slammed into an embrace that lasted a lot longer than it should have if they were going to be on time. “This is so not like them. Mom and Dad are never spontaneous. And why would they call you instead of me?”

“I don’t understand it either. I think they got the numbers mixed up.”

Things had been different since the kidnapping. Both his parents had been nicer, and the last time he and Harry had come over, Harry and his dad had actually gone out back into the shed his dad used for woodworking and spent some time together. “Did they sound mad?”

“You heard the message, so you tell me.”

“I’ll call them back once I finish dressing.” He smelled like the restaurant, and all he wanted was to shower and rest for a while. But the cryptic message his parents had left meant that they needed to get moving.

“I already tried. The call just goes to voice mail, so I don’t know what’s up. Just change, and we’ll hurry down there and find out what they want.” Harry released him, and Tristan hurried to their room and began dressing.

He’d agreed to move in with Harry a month ago, and things had been going great. The lease he and Kevin had had was up, so Kevin had found a smaller place on his own, and Tristan had moved in with Harry. He needn’t have worried. They got along great together, and other than a few bathroom issues, like the fact that Harry didn’t understand that looking good required more than five minutes in the morning, Tristan was happy.

Once he had fresh clothes on, he hurried to the bathroom, checked that his hair wasn’t hideous, and then met Harry by the front door. “Let’s go face the Christian firing squad.”

“It isn’t that bad,” Harry said.

“They’re on their best behavior when you’re around. Just wait.” Tristan smiled quickly and got in the car. Harry climbed in as well and pulled out of the driveway.

Tristan pulled out his phone as he rode and dialed his mother’s number. “Mom,” he said with relief when she answered. “What’s going on? Harry and I are on our way. You said you had something important to talk about.”

“Yes, honey. But we’ll do it when you get here,” she said seriously. “Are you on your way?”

“Yes. Harry and I just got on the freeway heading south. We should be there in half an hour.” His mother said good-bye, and Tristan disconnected. “She sounded rather ominous.” Tristan put his phone back in his pocket and stared out the window for a few minutes, his nerves nearly getting the better of him.

“They’re probably just being dramatic. Take it easy and relax. We’ll be there in a little while, and then they’ll tell you what this is all about.” Harry turned back to his driving and yawned once as they continued along with the flow of traffic.

Since Tristan came out to them just after high school, his parents had been standoffish and hadn’t seemed to know what to make of him. Tristan had tried to explain how he felt and who he was, but they’d never seemed interested. After the kidnapping, they had opened up, and even his father had warmed up to him. But in the past few weeks, the calls from his dad had tapered off, and the last time they spoke, it seemed as though they had returned to the way things had been before, cold and distant. He’d thought things might have thawed when his dad and Harry had spent time together, but it didn’t appear that way.

“Mom and Dad are never dramatic. I swear they must think it’s a sin.” Tristan continued looking out the window for a few minutes and then turned to Harry, placing his hand on his leg. “I appreciate you coming. You really didn’t have to.” Harry had been there for him for months, listening as he talked about what happened and even letting him yell and scream when he wanted to. Thankfully that was mostly behind him now. Eddie was in jail and would remain there until his trial in a few months. Tristan found he was actually looking forward to staring him down in court. That would at least put an end to this unfortunate chapter in his life.

“Of course I’m coming with you. Why wouldn’t I?” Harry seemed to get some perverse pleasure out of seeing Tristan’s parents. “They aren’t going to learn what we mean to each other if they don’t see us together. So when you go to visit, I’ll be right there too.”

Tristan tried not to get too nervous as they continued driving. Harry turned off the freeway, and they made their way down familiar roads and streets to the house Tristan had grown up in. “Someone in the neighborhood must be having a party,” Tristan observed as they pulled into the drive. He got out and waited for Harry before hurrying up to the front door. He knocked and then turned the knob and pushed open the door.

“Mom,” Tristan called.

“Surprise!” a crowd of people called. Tristan stepped back a second, bumping into Harry. “Happy Birthday.”

He gasped and turned to Harry. “You knew?”

Harry smiled, and Tristan smacked him on the shoulder. “What do you think your dad and I talked about when we were in the workshop?”

Tristan stepped fully into the room, and his mother hugged him. “I don’t understand.”

“I guess the whole kidnapping”—his mother looked at his dad—“helped us realize that life is too short to spend any of it angry or resentful. You’re our son.” She reached out and took Harry’s hand. “I was always afraid you’d be alone. But you have a good man who loves you, and that’s what matters.”

Tristan tried to take in what he was being told and the fact that all his friends were there, including Bull, and even Spook, standing in the corner out of the crush of people. His mother hugged him again, then stepped back, and his father hugged him. “Dad?”

“Yes,” his father whispered. Tristan knew that was likely as close to a statement of understanding as he was going to get from him. Tristan returned the hug, deepening it, and his father did as well. Then his father coughed a little self-consciously before stepping out of the way so they could get farther into the room.

Tristan greeted each person. After a few minutes, he felt Harry slide his hand into his. He never thought he’d hold the hand of the man he loved in his parents’ home.

“Are you happy?” Harry asked later, on the back deck. Tristan had gone outside to catch his breath.

“I’m beyond happy, though I still can’t understand how this happened.”

Harry took his hand. “I had a conversation with your dad that was very uncomfortable at first, but he opened up a little and eventually asked questions that I tried to answer.”

“Why didn’t he ask me?” Tristan asked.

“Sometimes some things are easier to ask someone you haven’t raised. I gave him straight answers, and I guess he began to think that maybe some of what he thought was black and white… wasn’t. I think he’s trying.” Harry squeezed his hand.

“You’re pretty amazing,” Tristan said, turning to Harry.

“So are you, sweetheart.” Harry leaned closer, and Tristan heard the door behind them slide open.

“Your friends are leaving,” his mother said, and Tristan colored and stepped back.

“I’ll be right there,” Tristan told her with a smile. She closed the door, and Tristan leaned close again, kissing Harry quickly before pulling back again. He didn’t want to move. Tristan was truly happy, and he smiled at Harry before taking his hand and leading him toward the door. “Sometimes I wonder when I’m going to mess everything up.” Harry stopped and pulled him close, kissing him hard, and the notion flew from his mind.

“Does that answer your question?” Harry asked.

All Tristan could do was smile and nod for a few seconds. Then he managed to whisper, “I love you too.” Harry stroked his cheek and then led him inside to join his family.

Inside Out