Beast (A Righteous Outlaws Novel #4) (The Righteous Outlaws) (19 page)

I
made
my way to the station to bring Dad dinner. After what happened at the street fair, Mom insisted on cooking Dad a big dinner. She hugged me repeatedly once she understood the reason I knocked her to the ground. Then, she insisted I bring Beast by for dinner so she could properly thank him with a homemade meal for saving our lives. I thought about Beast in my childhood home. Greeting my mother that he had a good foot and a half on. Him sitting at the dining room table and sharing a meal with my parents, my sister, and Taylor, while their kids ran around with Beauty. It seemed weird to think it, but at the same time it seemed so unbelievably right.

Dad and the rest of the station stood around one of the radios, listening to the dispatcher. “What’s going on?” I asked.

“There was an explosion at a warehouse down by the docks,” Dad explained.

I was about to shrug it off, when I remembered Beast being in a rush to leave. The way he said now to his brothers as if they were ready to follow through with something they’d been planning. And the docks. That’s where Gordita’s Army ran their business. Where I was almost killed until Beast saved me.

The room began to close in on me, and I grabbed a desk to steady myself. Beast was there. There was no doubt in my mind, but was he the one responsible for the explosion, or was he caught in it? My heart slammed against my chest as the room spun around me. I couldn’t catch my breath too scared to even breathe.

“Munchkin, you okay?” Dad asked and I nodded even though I wasn’t okay.

I wasn’t okay at all. I debated going to the docks, but what if I was too late? What if he was there, but he was dead? I couldn’t see him like that. Not after holding Chris in my arms, and watching someone I loved die.

“You sure? You look a little pale.”

“Have you seen Beast?”

“Not since he stopped the bomb.”

I looked Dad in the eyes and, without a word, he knew what I was getting at. “I’m sure he’s okay,” he whispered, so no one could hear us.

“He’s cheated death so many times. What happens if he couldn’t this time?”

Dad ushered me into his office, since I was getting a little hysterical, and closed the door. “Why don’t you try calling him before you jump to conclusions?” I pulled my phone out, and dialed his number as fast as I could with my shaking fingers.

It went right to voicemail, didn’t even ring once. I dialed again, but was met with the same standard voicemail. Of course, he didn’t have a personal message. Why would he? I just wanted to hear his voice.

“I need to go find him.”

I went to go out the door when Dad grabbed my arm. “You are to not go down to those docks. The FBI is on their way. They’ve been staking the location out for weeks now.”

Another thought suddenly popped into my head. What if he did survive, but he was caught there? What if he did something stupid, and was on his way to federal jail where I’d only be able to see him for conjugal visits? I took a steadying breath, and refused to let myself believe that.

“Promise me, Ryan. You will not go down there.”

“I promise,” I said, and Dad finally let me go.

* * *

N
ight had fallen
, and still no word from Beast. I had gone down to Aubree’s shop, but she had already closed. I walked Main Street, and then drove by his house a million times, before finally parking in his driveway and sitting on his steps.

Beauty barked from inside, and I wish I had a key so I could go in and hold her. She was the only link to Beast I had right now, and just holding her would help. At least, I thought it would. Because then at least I’d have someone to sit with while I waited.

Oh, God. What if he never came home? What if I sat here all night until morning, and he never came? Never called. What if I never saw him again?

I ignored the rising panic in my throat, and shoved any negative thoughts aside. I couldn’t think that. I wouldn’t let myself think the worst before I knew any details. But, as the minutes turned into hours, any hope I had began to fade away.

I rested my head against the door, listening to Beauty scratch against the wood. And bark every now and again, as if to remind me she was still there. I closed my eyes, and heard the familiar sound of a motorcycle turning onto the street.

I jumped up from the porch, and relief washed over me, as Beast got off his bike. Then, that relief turned into red, blinding anger.

“Hey,” he said, and I looked down at the blood splattered across his jeans, the cut under his eye, and the black soot that streaked his skin.

“Hey? Hey? That’s all you have to fucking say? Do you have any idea how scared I’ve been? How fucking terrified I’ve been?!” I was yelling, and I didn’t care. All the pent up emotion spilled out of my eyes as I continued yelling. “I thought you were fucking dead.”

“Why would you think that?” he asked.

“You disappeared, and then I hear that there’s an explosion down in Gordita’s territory. What the fuck was I supposed to think? You didn’t answer your goddamned phone, and I couldn’t find you anywhere.”

‘Hey, calm down,” he said, reaching out to me and taking me in his arms.

“No!” I screamed, shoving at his chest, not caring how warm he felt. “Don’t you hug me!”

“Look, I’m sorry. We had to take care of things. I wasn’t going to risk you getting hurt. Not again.”

“Then fucking tell me what you’re doing!”

He ran his hands through his hair in frustration, giving me a tinge of satisfaction. Good. He deserved to be frustrated and irritated for what he put me through.

“If you would have told me, or answered your fucking phone…”

“I couldn’t!” he yelled, and the strength of his voice had me jumping back. “Don’t you fucking get it? I can’t tell you certain things. You’re a cop, and I wouldn’t put you in that position. You need to fucking trust me, or this is never going to work.”

“Trust you? I do fucking trust you! But, when you just take off without giving me any details, what the fuck do you expect me to think? Huh? How the fuck was I supposed to know that you weren’t curled up in a ball somewhere losing your damn mind?” I yelled, shoving my hands into his chest again. The tears came harder now as the real truth pushed its way to the surface. “I thought I lost you! I thought you were fucking dead, and I’d never get the chance to tell you I love you.” I shoved him harder. “Because I do. I love you so fucking much, and the thought of you never knowing…”

He slammed his mouth to mine, cutting off my words. His hands grabbed my ass, and hoisted me up, carrying me up the stairs. He pressed my back against the wall, as he thrust his tongue into my mouth. I heard the sound of his keys in the lock, and Beauty barking, but all I could focus on was this kiss. This kiss that was so full of emotion, full of everything I felt, and everything he needed to know.

The door opened and he slammed it behind us, ignoring Beauty as she whined and barked. There would be enough time with her later, but right now the only thing I wanted was to feel Beast inside me, filling me completely, bringing me to the edge as we both fell over together.

He pinned me against the door; his fingers curled into the hem of my shirt, and pulled it over my head. A growl rumbled up his throat at the black lace bra I was wearing. I forgot he’d never seen me in anything other than my sports bra.

“Holy fuck,” he said, just as he dipped his head, and dragged his tongue across where the lace met my skin.

“Mmm,” I moaned, as he massaged me through the lace.

I reached down grabbing his shirt, frantic to get it off, to feel his skin against mine. “Off!” I demanded, and he let me slide down the door. With my feet on the floor, I made quick use of getting rid of the rest of my clothes,

“Keep these on,” he said, nodding at my bra and matching thong.

Beast tossed his shirt to the ground, and it landed on top of Beauty. She flung her head back a few times, before reemerging, then attacking the shirt.

I started to laugh, but it was cut off when Beast’s fingers dug into the soft flesh of my ass, and he hoisted me back up against the door. He pulled my thong aside, and plunged his fingers into my wetness, causing hot shocks of electricity to spark through my body.

His lips crushed mine, sucking my tongue into his mouth. My moans were muffled against his lips, as his fingers slipped out of me, and he shoved his cock deep inside. I pulled away, crying out, as he plunged in and out of me with relentless thrusts, taking us both closer to the edge.

“I’m going to come.”

“Wait for me,” he demanded, and I held onto every ounce of control I could muster as he continued to send me spiraling.

My nails cut into his skin, as I fought the urge to fall into the abyss. Holding on by a tiny thread, he finally said what I needed to hear, “Come for me, darlin’.”

My body shuddered as hot delicious waves crashed into me, pulling me down into a sea of pure bliss. Beast came with a growl, shooting his seed deep inside me.

It was heaven on earth. The best damn orgasm of my life. I couldn’t stop shaking, my breath coming in short tiny gasps. Our chests touched with each breath, and I wrapped my arms around his neck, never wanting to let go.

Beast pressed a kiss to my ear, and then said the words I never thought I’d hear him say. “I love you, too.”

I
held
Ryan in my arms, not ready to let her go yet, not sure if I’d ever be able to let her go. I felt like I had fought the battle of my life to get to her, and I wanted to soak up every goddamned second together. I fucking deserved it.

Beauty jumped up on my leg, knocking me back to reality. I kissed Ryan’s head, and placed her back down on her feet. I reached down, ready to clean up, when I realized I had nothing to clean up. “Fuck!”

“What’s the matter?” Ryan asked, concern causing tiny wrinkles to form on the bridge of her nose.

“We didn’t use a condom.”

“I’m on a birth control. So, the only thing I have to worry about is if you’re clean.”

“I’m clean. I don’t fuck anything that walks like my brothers. Or, at least, like most of them used to.”

She rested her hands on my chest and looked up at me. “Then, I’ll consider myself special.”

I tucked a stray hair behind her ear, letting my fingers linger just below her earlobe. “You are.”

“You need to stop saying things like that because a girl can really get used to it.”

“Then, get used to it because I’m not going to stop.”

A smile spread across her kissed swollen lips, and my cock jumped to life, pressing against her stomach.

“Seriously?”

“What can I say? He likes what he sees.”

Beauty jumped up on my leg again, scratching like a possessed lunatic. A high-pitched whine came out of her, and Ryan laughed. “I think someone is hungry.”

It was definitely well past her dinnertime. “Let me get her taken care of, and then I should take a shower.”

“What about a bath?”

“Only if you’ll join me.”

She kissed my cheek, and stepped back on her tiptoes. “I’ll go run the water.” She strutted away in the lacy black thong and matching bra that was the sexiest fucking thing I’d ever seen in my life. Her ass was marked red where my fingers dug into her flesh. She stopped and spun toward me. “And then you can tell me where you were, and why you’re covered in blood and soot.”

Damn. I thought she’d let that go. Understand that there were certain things she shouldn’t know. I didn’t want to put her in a situation that made her liable. That put her job at jeopardy. Plus, the things I did, they were my burden and I didn’t want her to have to bear any of it. I was used to doing it alone. My shoulders were strong enough to carry it all.

Her beautiful brown eyes stared at me, her eyebrow arching slightly. God, she was so fucking gorgeous, a fucking angel on earth, that made me actually want to share the burden. To allow her to help me lessen the weight. To stand beside me and be my partner.

“I’ll tell you whatever you want to know,” I finally said.

“Good.” She gave me a smug smile that only made my cock harden even more. “I’m telling you, you’re really going to like this talking and sharing thing. I bet eventually I won’t be able to get you to shut up.”

“Let’s not push it.”

She walked away laughing, and I took a minute to appreciate the joyful sound that made my heart fucking swell in my chest. It was an odd sensation, one I hadn’t felt in a very long time, but, as odd as it was, it was also a welcomed feeling.

Beauty, not to be ignored, got on her hind legs and started waving her front paws at me. Fucking dog. I bent down and scooped her up. “Come on, you pain in my ass. Let’s feed you.” She responded with a lick to my face, managing to get her tongue right up my fucking nose. I gently pushed her head away, and gave her a good ear scratch, before putting her back down on the floor.

Once Beauty was fed, I made my way to the bathroom. The lights were dimmed, casting a pale glow in the hallway. I leaned against the doorframe, crossing my arms over my chest, and looking down at Ryan in my tub, her hair twirled up in a loose bun.

She moved her wet glistening body, resting her arms on the edge of the tub, and looking up at me. “You only have bar soap.”

“What else am I supposed to have?”

“Body wash or bubble bath.”

“Are you kidding?”

She tilted her head, a spark in her eyes. “I’m not high-maintenance, but I do like my body wash and a loofah.”

“What the fuck is a loofah?”

She rolled her eyes. “Men.”

I stepped into the tub, sat down, and pulled her back against my front. I took the washcloth she had already soaped up, and ran it across her tits. “I’ll buy you some shit tomorrow.”

She turned in my arms, the water sloshing over the side of the tub. “You don’t have to. I was just kidding.”

I cupped her cheek, because, damn it, I fucking wanted to. Touching her was all I wanted to do. “I can’t expect you to use bar soap, now can I?”

“Are you mocking me?”

“No. I just want my girl to be happy.”

“I am,” she said, and it was like fucking music to my damn heart.

“But if you start scratching my leg and whining, I’m drawing a line.”

“Was that a joke?” She poked at my sides, and I shifted away from her finger, but she was relentless. Her laugh filled the bathroom as I tried to grab her hands, then gave up and started tickling her sides. She laughed and screamed and, when I pulled her legs over me, our bodies pressing together, my cock sitting against her entrance, she went silent. Her fingers ran through my hair, causing damn goosebumps to pop up on my skin. She took my face in her hands, and brought her lips to mine, just as I thrust inside her, creating a wave of water.

I ignored the water sloshing over the edge, and made love to my girl.

* * *

T
he bathroom was
a fucking mess of water, so I threw a shit ton of towels on the floor and left it for morning. Ryan was wrapped in a towel, sitting on the kitchen counter and snacking on pretzels, when I reemerged. Beauty was on the floor, waiting for crumbs to fall.

It was a gorgeous fucking sight to see, and I couldn’t help but wonder when the hell it was when my luck changed. For so long, I lived in a shit show. Everything went wrong. Everybody I got close to died. I was fucking terrified to let anyone else in. Never wanted to feel that loss again, and the pain it brought. But Ryan found a way into my life and, fuck, I was scared. Neither of us lived safe lives, and anything could happen at any minute, but I didn’t care. Because the thought of never seeing her again scared me more.

I had no idea how much time I would get with Ryan, but I planned on cherishing every goddamned day, and thanking my lucky fucking stars for every second I had with her.

“Want a pretzel?” she asked.

“Did you eat dinner?”

“This is it. I wasn’t hungry earlier because someone had my stomach in knots.”

I walked over to her, taking the pretzels out of her hand, and placing them on the counter. I rested my hands on either side of her. “Sorry about that.”

“It’s okay. Just don’t do it again.”

“I don’t know if I can promise that. I don’t want to lie to you, and promise things that I can’t do. And I need you to be okay with that.”

She let out a puff of air, running her hand up my neck to my hair. “I don’t like it.”

“You don’t have to like it. You just have to find a way to accept it. Can you do that for me?”

“As long as you promise to always come home to me.”

“I told you I’m not going to lie to you.”

“Then, don’t. Just promise me that you will do everything you possibly can to come home to me every night. That you won’t leave me.”

My life was so unpredictable, and, even though we managed to take the army down and nab Montamos in the same plan, I knew it wasn’t the end. It would never be the end. A new club or gang would form and try to claim our territory. Try to take what was ours, and I would have to fight. Would have to do what I could to save my brothers and my town.

I looked into her eyes, and the jumbled mess in my mind suddenly cleared. It didn’t matter what came my way in the future because Ryan would be there. And, as long as she was waiting for me, I would always come home. “I promise,” I said, and she crushed her lips to mine, wrapping her legs around me, and using the heel of her foot to pull me closer. I lifted her off the counter and carried her to the bedroom.

“What about dinner?” I asked, as I was about to go through the doorway.

“The pretzels were my dinner. I’m ready for dessert.”

I kissed her with everything I had, and then placed her on my bed, right where she belonged.

I put my knee between her legs and crawled on top of her. “You never told me what happened,” she said.

“Later,” I said, kissing her argument right off her lips.