Beauty and the Earl (20 page)

“Oh no, miss,” Rachel said with a blush. “His lordship locked himself in his chamber after you left.”

Violet squeezed her eyes shut.
She
had done that to him. His renewed isolation was her fault.

“I could hear him crashing around and breaking things from across the hall,” Rachel continued, unaware of how deeply her words cut into Violet’s very soul. “Should I unpack for you, miss?”

Violet covered her chest with both hands, willing herself to breathe, to remain stoic when all she wished to do was collapse.

“No, Rachel. We will return to London in the morning, so there is no need to unpack anything.” She squeezed the maid’s hand. “I’m certain it has been a trying day. Why don’t you rest for a while? Have your supper. I’ll call for you later and we can make our arrangements.”

Her maid bobbed out a nod and slipped to the door. But there, she stopped. “I-I’m sorry, miss.”

Violet looked up at her. She knew what Rachel meant. “So am I.”

The maid left the room quietly and Violet stared at the open door. Across the hall was Olivia’s chamber, and her friend had been locked in alone since their return to this house.

It appeared Olivia hadn’t even let her own maid in, for her trunks were stacked beside the door.

With a sigh, Violet moved across the way and knocked on her friend’s door. There was no answer.

“Olivia, darling, it’s me. Let me in, won’t you?” she said though the barrier.

There was a moment’s silence, then she heard Olivia come across the room and the key turned. Violet let herself in and watched as Olivia silently walked across the room to a chair beside the window. She sat there and stared outside, her face blank and nothing like the normally vivacious and bright expression she normally kept.

Violet flinched in guilt. After all, this was her fault as well.

“Olivia, have you been sitting there all this time?” she asked as she dragged a chair of her own to the same spot and sat across from her friend.

Olivia nodded but didn’t make eye contact. “I have.”

“It was an ugly scene,” Violet said softly, trying not to allow images from that awful morning to bombard her. She failed miserably. All she could see in her mind was Liam’s face, the betrayal he so keenly felt.

“Very,” Olivia agreed, and one tear escaped to roll down her cheek.

Violet gasped at the sight of it. She had not yet allowed herself tears, but seeing her friend’s made her denial all the harder. She just had to get through the next week or so and then she could cry all she liked.

She swallowed past the lump in her throat and caught Olivia’s hand.

“We knew it could happen,” she said, half hoping to reassure herself as much as she tried to reassure Olivia.

Olivia looked at her evenly. “I
never
knew any of this would happen.”

Violet looked out the window to the small garden below. She had no idea how to respond in the face of her friend’s despair, not when she was trying so hard to keep her own heartbreak and disappointment in check. But there was nothing to be done about it. She knew that. She had accepted it.

Mostly.

She pushed to her feet and smoothed her hands over her skirts.

“Tomorrow we’ll go back to London,” she said. “I will collect my ill-gotten gains and then that will be all. I’m sure eventually we will forget this…we’ll forget.”

Of course that wasn’t true, but she said it anyway. Perhaps one day she might believe it if she said it enough.

Olivia glanced up at her. “I’m not going back to London.”

Violet’s thoughts fled and she jerked her gaze toward Olivia. “I—what do you mean? Of course you’ll come back to London with me!”

Olivia shook her head. “No.”

Violet dropped down to her knees in front of her friend and caught both her hands. “Oh, Olivia, please don’t be angry. I’m so sorry I involved you in this, I didn’t mean to bring you grief. You are my best friend and my sister. Please don’t hate me, I couldn’t bear it if you hated me too.”

Olivia touched her face. “Dearest, my reasons for not going to London have nothing to do with you. I’m not angry with you in the slightest.”

Relief rushed through Violet, along with confusion. “Then…then why won’t you return with me?”

“Because of my feelings for
him
,” her friend whispered, eyes welling with tears again, which she blinked away.

Violet stood slowly. “For Malcolm.”

Olivia nodded. “I am in love with him, Violet.”

Violet felt no surprise at this admission. She had seen it happening in front of her, even if she wasn’t fully focused on anyone but herself. “Of course you are.”

“And
because
I love him, I have no choice but to stay and try to fix this wedge between us.” Olivia sighed heavily. “Even if it takes a great deal of time, I must try.”

Violet paced away, praying her friend wouldn’t see her wince. Olivia loved Malcolm and she was free to pursue that love for him. And if anyone could convince a man to forgive her, it was Olivia. It only put the finality of Violet’s own situation into stark focus.

“If you love the man, you should fight for him,” she said without looking at Olivia.

Her friend got to her feet. “And what about
you
?”

“What about me?”

“I think it is evident you care deeply for Liam. I wager you may love him too.” Olivia tried to meet her eyes, but Violet refused to do it.
 

Just as she refused to confess her heart, even to her best friend. Knowing it in her mind was painful enough, allowing the words to be spoken…that could very well break her in two.

“You are mistaken,” she said, pressing a hand to the cool glass and staring outside.

“Am I?” Olivia’s tone was gentle.
 

Slowly, Violet turned and looked at her friend. There was no doubt Olivia saw through her.

“Even if I did harbor some kind of tender feelings for him, he despises me now. And with good reason.” Her voice broke and she sucked in a harsh breath.
 

“Oh, Violet.” Olivia moved to comfort her, but Violet stepped away. She was like glass now. If someone touched her, she feared she would shatter and never be put together again.

“It doesn’t matter. I did what I did in order to be with my son. And as soon as I can finish this dreadful business with the Rothcastles, I can go to him. It will be worth it. It has to be worth it.”

Olivia nodded, but it was a jerky motion. Neither one of them was certain of that and they had both lost so much.

“You go back tomorrow?”

“As early as I can depart in the morning,” Violet said, shaking her head in the hopes she could clear thoughts of Liam away. “I’ve already sent a missive ahead to Lord and Lady Rothcastle. It will likely arrive just ahead of me, but at least they will anticipate my coming. And hopefully we can deal with our business swiftly, I have no desire to linger on it.”

“And then you’ll move on?”

There was doubt in Olivia’s voice. In truth, there was a great deal of doubt in Violet’s heart. But she couldn’t falter.
 

“Yes,” she whispered.

Olivia took her hand. “It will work out.”

Violet flinched. “I hope so.”

But even as she said it, it didn’t feel like it was true. And she wasn’t certain it ever would.

Morning had broken after a long and sleepless night, but Liam could not celebrate its beauty, despite staring out at a perfect day from the breakfast room window. The fact that the weather was magnificent and the birds were chirping actually felt like an affront. Why could it not rain when he was torn into pieces?

The door behind him opened and when it slammed shut behind him, he knew who had entered without even turning.

“Malcolm,” he said, and he did turn to look at his disheveled, red-faced friend.

While Liam had withdrawn into himself and brooded over Violet, only expressing his anger and upset in the privacy of his now-slightly destroyed chamber, Mal had taken a different tact.

His friend had stormed, he had slammed, he had bitten the head off of nearly every servant in Liam’s employ. Now Liam wasn’t surprised to see the same dark and dangerous expression on Mal’s face that had been there for almost twenty-four terrible hours.

“She left,” his friend snapped as he slammed a plate onto the sideboard and shoveled food onto the dish without even looking at it.

“She?” Liam said without clarifying what his friend meant. There was only one
she
now. “Not they?”

Mal snorted and Liam shook his head. Perhaps his friend didn’t mean what Liam thought he did.

“Which she?” he asked, his heart throbbing.

Mal slowed his violent dishing and glanced up at him. “
Violet
. Gone early this morning back to London. Olivia remains in the home that was let by Rothcastle.”

Liam turned toward the window again as emotions he did not want seemed to bombard him mercilessly. Violet’s departure only solidified what he already knew—everything they’d shared had been a lie. Despite all appearances to the contrary, she had never given a damn about him.
 

That her betrayal was deep and dark.

And yet, he still cared for her. Stupidly, foolishly and desperately.
 

“Why do you track their movements?” he asked. “I don’t want to know.”

Which was a lie, but he said it regardless.

“I want to fucking know,” Mal said.

Liam turned as his friend sat down at the table and shoved his plate as far from him as he could. Mal sprawled back in a dining chair, and for the first time Liam saw how rough his friend looked. His eyes were rimmed with red from lack of sleep and his face was drawn and desperate.

His expression was in every way a reflection of how Liam felt.

“Why?” Liam asked.

Mal looked at him and beyond the anger, Liam saw something else. Pain. Heartbroken, razor-sharp pain, the kind that destroyed a man.

He knew it well.

“I told you I loved Olivia a few days ago,” Mal said. “In the heat of an angry moment.”

Liam raised his brows. He had never considered his friend’s confession that day to be anything but truth and had been so wrapped up in himself that he hadn’t realized Mal was struggling with his feelings.

“Was that a lie?” he asked softly.

“It was never a lie. It was just utterly stupid. I do love her.”

The words were rather shocking considering all the two men knew now about their lovers’ deception, but somehow Liam wasn’t shocked. Over the time they had been together, there was no denying how swiftly and powerfully Malcolm and Olivia had come together. He had seen their bond grow, he had seen his friend happier than he had ever been.

“And how is that utterly stupid?” Liam asked.

Mal shook his head. “Come, Liam, she was as part of this deception as Violet was. She came here to keep me from developing suspicions about her friend. I was just a pawn in their game.”

Liam stared at him. He felt the same way about what Violet had done, but somehow he could forgive Olivia.

“Let me ask you a question,” he said.

Mal shrugged and fiddled with a loose string on the tablecloth without answering.

“Would you lie for me?”

Mal jerked his gaze up. “What?”

“If I asked you to lie, would you?”

His friend swallowed hard. “Yes.”

“In fact, you have lied for me in the past, haven’t you?”

“Yes, but that is different.”

Liam sighed. “Probably not to those you lied to.” He shook his head. “If Violet ever told me the truth, and I think there were times when she did, then the bond she and Olivia share is powerful,
very
powerful.”

“And so that means I should forgive?” Mal asked, but Liam could see his friend was thinking about what he said even if he tried to fight it.

“What you do is up to you,” Liam said. “But the fact that Olivia didn’t go back to London with Violet says a great deal to me about where she stands.”

Mal bit out a bitter laugh. “Perhaps she thinks she can get something from me.”

Liam shook his head. “Weren’t you the one who told me if I wanted to die miserable and alone, that was my prerogative, but that you didn’t approve? Seems you might wish to follow your own advice.”

Mal rolled his eyes. “Says the man who has been in hiding for years.”

“Well, do as I say not as I do.” Liam smiled even though he felt no joy in this conversation. “At least go talk to the girl, Mal. At least let her explain. Unlike Violet, she didn’t orchestrate this mess. And she
stayed
. As I said, that has to mean something.”

“I’ll consider it.” Mal shrugged as if it didn’t matter, but there was something in his eyes that told Liam he had hit his mark.
 

Liam knew what that meant. Mal would do it. Mal would do it, and he and Olivia would probably work it out. Which made him happy for his friend.