Beauty From Ashes (52 page)

“Yes, I have. And I sincerely thank you for not laughing at me. I’ve told almost no one. Mama knows and John Couper and my sisters. None of them laughed at me, either. I don’t know what they think about it, but at least they didn’t laugh. I guess everyone decided simply that it’s something old Pete would do.”

“I couldn’t laugh at anything so touching. Could I ask a bold question?” When Pete nodded yes, Jessie asked if she’d told Dr. Sam about her childhood playmate.

“I was afraid you’d ask that. But, yes, I told him. Of course, he said it only made him love me more.”

“I believe that, don’t you?”

“Oh, Jessie, I don’t know what I believe! I’ve done fine as a spinster all these

years. Mama and John Couper and my 703 two sisters seem enough for me. Do you believe that?”

Without any hesitation, Jessie said, “Yes, Pete. I most certainly do believe that. But you’re missing so, so much without children of your own.”

“Maybe.”

“Take it from me, you are missing so much. And I see so plainly how deeply you’re attached to your nephew, Fraser. Wouldn’t you—was

“Yes!” Pete blurted. “If I thought Sam and I might have a child half as lovable as Fraser, I would really be in a quandary. But how does one ever know? Sometimes children only bring trouble. And what if there’s a war soon? There could be. Mothers suffer more than anyone except sweethearts when a young man has to go to war. All this glory stuff when a young man is sent off to bleed and die for some geographic boundaries makes me sick! Mama and I both hate war. And every bit of me is revolted at the idea of anybody’s son being used as cannon fodder!”

“Pete, you and I have come to be fast friends, haven’t we?”

“I believe we have.”

“Will we remain friends if there is a war between the

North and the South? Is it true that there are a lot of Unionists in Marietta? Are you one?”

“I wondered how long we’d be able to avoid the subject, Jessie. Yes. I’m all for keeping the Union and so is Mama. And yes, there are Unionists in Marietta. Men don’t plant large tracts up there the way you do here.” For a long moment, neither spoke. Then, Pete went on. “Sam asked me the same question almost as soon as I got here. With all my heart, I want to believe him. He claims he’s also a Unionist. Vows that’s one reason he’s so interested in Marietta as a place to practice medicine. Do you believe that?”

“I know it. He and Paul get into an argument every time the subject comes up. That’s why it’s been possible for you and me to avoid it until now. Marry him, Pete. At least the ugly trouble can’t come between you and Dr. Sam!”

Anne had missed her daughter Pete even more than she feared the day she and her other two girls saw her off at the railroad station, headed for

Jasper, Florida. 705

As close as the two friends had grown, Anne even had trouble telling Louisa Fletcher how concerned she had become during the nearly two months Pete had been away. Even as she tried her best to give Louisa an honest opinion of Dr. Samuel Smith, who accompanied Pete home over the long, difficult miles, she felt inadequate to the telling. Seated at a secluded corner table in the dining room of Henry Greene Cole’s large Marietta Hotel, where Louisa and Dix were now living, Anne could tell Louisa was doing her level best to help. Louisa knew exactly how Anne had missed Pete, how she had come to depend on her daughter’s company, her honesty, even her willfulness. Pete was being willful about Dr. Samuel Smith, though, in a way even her own mother didn’t understand, and as Louisa saw it, a way Anne definitely did not accept.

“How do you know I don’t accept it?” Anne asked her friend. “The truth is, I don’t know whether I accept Pete’s strange behavior or not. I don’t even know that I’m not just imagining that she’s acting unlike herself.”

“I can tell you if you promise not to give me that icy look.”

“Louisa, I never mean to give you an icy look. How could I? You’re my best friend.”

“And you’re mine, but best friends can upset best friends, even when it’s the last thing intended. This will probably upset you, but aren’t best friends supposed to help at a time like this? Over and over I’ve asked you to tell me point-blank when I forget and let my rancor spew toward Reverend Benedict when his refusal to allow me to take Communion hurts in a deeper way. I can’t imagine our Lord turning any of us away just because we’re not communicants of a certain church, so some Sundays I confess I am hurt more than others. But because you are my best friend, I trust you to tell me when I let it show too much.”

Anne smiled ever so slightly. Then, with an edge to her voice, she said, “But I don’t expect you to act as though you understand why Reverend Benedict is so pigheaded. You expect me to understand why Pete is suddenly at Dr. Sam’s feet. Don’t deny it. He’s a nice enough young gentleman, but I don’t understand and I’m not sure I even want to!”

“I must admit that’s true honesty, 707 Anne.”

“Who would know better than her own mother that Pete just isn’t the kind of young woman to plunge into something as serious as marriage without giving it great thought ahead of time.”

“And who says the girl is even considering marriage?”

“I say it because Pete just does not do anything halfway!”

“Anne, don’t you believe Pete when she still insists that she made that long trip to Jasper, Florida, to set your heart at rest about the woman Paul Demere married?”

“In part, yes. She also went because she’s so deeply fond of Annie’s boy, Fraser Demere.”

“And does that really alter a single fact in this whole thing? It seems to me that both Pete’s reasons for going show only affection and real caring for you.” When Anne said nothing, Louisa went on. “I’m going to ask an impertinent question right now. One you may not care to answer or even to face. One you certainly won’t like.”

“And has that ever stopped you in the past?”

“No, but I flatter myself that I’ve earned the right because of our friendship.”

“True.”

“Did your daughter Annie ever really know how much you disliked and disapproved of the man she chose to marry?”

“Where did you ever get the idea that I disapproved of Paul Demere? There was no finer family anywhere in coastal Georgia than the Demeres. Old Captain Raymond Demere came over with James Oglethorpe, was granted his fifty acres of rich land by the Crown, and built a fine house—Harrington Hall.”

“I’m not talking about his pedigree, and you know perfectly well I’m not, Anne. You didn’t like Paul himself.”

“Did I ever say I didn’t in so many words?”

“No, but I do know you by now, and it was clear that even Fraser, your grandson, knew how you felt about his father. I could tell that when he visited here from Savannah with John Couper.” Louisa laid her hand over Anne’s. Anne’s hand flexed briefly as though she was about to jerk it away. Then her fingers closed over Louisa’s and

squeezed hard, clinging, the gesture all 709 but begging for help.

Finally, Anne whispered, “My daughter Annie was so sensitive to me—to everyone—I suppose she did know how I felt down inside. But does it matter now what she knew? I’m not about to make the same mistake with Selina. I tell her over and over how much I like her young man, George Stubinger—and I do like him. I’ll be able to welcome him warmly as my son-in-law.”

In an effort to put Anne at ease again, Louisa began to tell her of the exciting plans she, her married daughter, Georgia, and her son-in-law, Henry Greene Cole, were making at the Marietta Hotel for the all-important Fourth of July social season to be centered around the Georgia Military Institute. “Here, at my son-in-law’s hotel, we’ll be serving dinner to a hundred people, and, of course, since Georgia thinks no one else can do it, I’ll be the one to see to all the decorations. Examinations begin July 10, continue all week, and everything will culminate in the College Grand Ball.”

“A hundred people are invited to the dinner? For heaven’s sake, Louisa, who all will be there?”

“You and your daughters, undoubtedly, since this is George Stubinger’s final session at school. Then all the other cadets, plus the new military company known as the McDonald’s Guards, plus certain specially invited citizens. I’ve decided to decorate the tables with fruit, evergreens, flowers, and carefully arranged banners. It isn’t the end of June yet and the hotel is already filling up with out-of-town folk. Requests for rooms are pouring in.” Louisa broke off her half-complaining narrative. “Anne, forgive me! You’re not listening anyway and why should you?”

“Oh, but I am listening, Louisa. And your willingness to take on so much extra work in order to help Georgia’s husband in such a huge undertaking shows me far more than mere words that, unlike me, you’ll go to almost any length for Georgia’s sake. I know how much you dislike hotel business—you and Dix both. You must be happy your husband has hired someone to manage the Fletcher House.”

“Yes, I certainly am!”

“But here you are diving in again because 711 Henry Greene Cole owns this hotel and you mean to see to it that his huge influx of guests want for nothing. The Fourth of July festivities will be perfect, because you’re not as spoiled and selfish as I’ve always been. Louisa, help me with Pete, please?”

“You don’t like Dr. Sam either, do you, Anne?”

“I think I do like him, a lot. And that’s what puzzles me so about myself! He’s only five years older than Pete. His profession, heaven knows, is an honorable one. He seems to adore her, and although I find it very hard to believe, I feel Pete loves this man. I’m just so taken aback, I guess, because I felt so sure I’d always have Pete right beside me for the remainder of my days. How could she change so completely in such a short time? It’s just so unlike Pete!”

“Unlike Pete as she really is, or unlike the image you’ve built up for her all these years? I’ve never quite understood, Anne, how you could honestly believe that an attractive young lady—even your tomboy daughter—could really

remain faithful to a childhood pledge made so many years ago when both she and the little King boy were only children.”

Anne had been clinging to Louisa’s hand. Now she released it and leaned back in her chair. She smiled when she spoke, but her words were firm, to the point. “Louisa Fletcher, sometimes you make me angrier than anyone has done in all my sixty-three years!”

“I know I do.”

“Then why do you go on doing it?”

“I’m your friend, Anne. I sincerely want to help you as you’ve helped me so often.”

“When have I really helped you? I can’t think of one single time!”

“Then you’re not thinking straight. You’ve helped with two big, hurtful problems that come to my mind. The first was the day you convinced me forever that you loved your handsome husband, John, despite the many differences between you. From that moment to this, because you’d told me that, I’ve been more content with the equally numerous differences between Dix and me. In my heart, I had blamed him all the years of our married life for not liking to discuss, as I do, the books he’s reading, for seeming to refuse to use

his rather good mind except on business 713 matters. I made it easy to allow him to bore me at times! No more, thanks to you. I now find a measure of real fulfillment from being his devoted, loyal wife, as different as we still are. The other heartbreaking problem I’ve faced, as you well know, is the ugly, cruel fact that the rector of St. James Episcopal Church, where you and I worship God together, refuses, because I’m a Unitarian, to serve Communion to me.”

Anne, listening intently, asked, “But how on earth did I help you with that, Louisa? Reverend Benedict still refuses you Communion.”

“You told me in your straightforward way that Reverend Benedict was robbing you, too, by refusing Communion to me. You may not fully understand why that helped me so much, Anne, but take my word for it as I took yours.”

“Oh, Louisa, what will we do if we’re separated? I know Dix means for you to move out to your farm at Woodlawn someday. What will I do if we can’t see each other for weeks at a time? I do depend on you so much!”

“And you know you depend on having Pete right in the house with you, watching over your every change of

mood, listening for your laughter, seeing to your needs. You know these things all blend into what you’re calling your mysterious dislike of Dr. Sam, don’t you? At least your resentment that he came into Pete’s life.”

“Yes, I know all that. And I also know that I dare not depend on anyone but God. Only He won’t change, because change is not in His nature. And, Louisa, I’m so worried about the changes in our country. Do you think there’s going to be a war? Will the Federal government, in which we both believe, attack us if the Southern states secede? Even John Couper’s loyalty is with the South. Not vindictively so, but I’m struggling to accept the fact that since he’s paymaster for his Savannah regiment, if there is a war, my only son will fight against the beliefs of both his parents. Louisa, please, please tell me why that is? No one, not even my fine, dependable son, could possibly love St. Simons Island any more than I do!”

“You don’t seem terribly upset because your Fanny’s sympathies are with the Rebels down here. Do you know why that is?”

“No. If I’m honest, no. I suppose

because she isn’t John Couper.” 715

“Is that the only reason you can think of?”

“I guess so.”

Louisa straightened her plump shoulders and tried to smile. “Will you just listen to us, Anne? We’re crossing all kinds of bridges before we come to them. The Southern states haven’t seceded yet! Unless wise, truly patriotic Mr. Lincoln is elected President, perhaps they won’t. If he is elected in November, maybe he can bring some reason to bear on all our problems.”

“I’ll turn your premise back on you, Louisa. Is that the only reason you can think of that might keep us from what could be ghastly bloodshed?”

Louisa looked out the hotel dining-room window onto the busy Square outside, where women were shopping, drays were rumbling by, citizens of Marietta were going about their daily affairs as though the whole world were at peace. “It’s the only reason I can think of right now, Anne.”