BECCA Season of Willows (12 page)

“Why? WHY? Why didn’t you find her? Why didn’t you find her?”
She collapsed on him. Mr. Henderson took over.
“Mac you comfort your Mama and Mazie. Seth you help River bury…Nola. I’ll make the coffee.”

Seth and River buried Nola by the steam under the Willows she loved. They buried her deep and with rocks over the grave so no animal will harm her. Seth fashioned a cross for her grave nailed the ring he gave Nola to the cross.
River stood there seeing the woman that loved Seth Henderson buried and with the earth again. He would grieve for her. He placed a hand on Seth’s shoulder.
“I know she loved you and wanted to marry you.”
Seth rose and turned in anger but saw sadness in River’s eyes and he hung his head and nodded. The anger was gone and grief replaced it.
“I know you sent for her to be your wife but I fell in love with her. I asked her to marry me and she said ‘yes’. We planned to wed next month.”
Seth started to sob hiding his grief-stricken face in his hands.
River placed a hand on Seth’s shoulder. He saw all his dreams of marriage and children going down stream like water through his hands. He knew just how Seth felt.
“I am sorry Seth. I know. She told me she could not love me because she loved you. She planned to have a long life with you.”
Seth buried his face in his hands and wept. River stood with his hand on Seth’s shoulder with tears running down his face for Seth, for Nola and for the woman he loved…his Becca.

It was another two weeks before they had the ranch cleaned up and found all the animals. They were all alive…even the cow, Mrs. Astor. The only one to loose their life was Nola.
Becca visited her grave every day and set flowers or something as a mark of respect. Becca sent a telegraph to Auntie and Uncle about the tragedy. She knew they would take it badly.
It had now been over two months since Harrison had left and Becca was restless to have him return. She needed to know he was alright.

It wasn’t long into the next week she heard the horses coming into the yard. Tuck looked like hell and she looked around at five others still looking for Harrison. The men had bandages over cuts and slings on some of their arms. Bruises were all over their faces and they had the smell of death on them.
Tuck dismounted and walked to the porch. River walked from the barn to see what was going on.

He came over to him and Tuck spoke softly to him. Becca saw raw pain on River’s face and his eyes turn to her. Becca felt her world ending. Somehow she knew.
Oh NO! Not Harrison? Where is he? He’s supposed to come home! He promised!

Tuck walked up beside Becca and River watched her as she heard that Harrison would not be coming home. He had died in a stampede along with eight of the other men as the huge storm traveled southeast. Hail and lightning spooked the cattle and another tornado ripped the Kansas plains and set off the cattle into a wild stampede. Harrison lost his life as well as eight other men.
Becca fainted and River ran to help Tuck hold her from falling. River scooped her into his arms and carried her into the bedroom she and Harrison used.
River watched over Becca for the next week. She had periods of shouting and then sobbing and then just staring. He was actually afraid for her sanity.
He had seen many women go through the loss of their man. The sad thing was she had no body to bury and grieve over.

Even River had trouble with this, for his very best friend and brother was dead. He had hoped it was a good death but he doubted it. Brother wind, when he was angry could be merciless.
The only thing that kept Becca and River going was Mac and Mazie. They needed them both badly. The children couldn’t understand that their father was dead and never returning. They refused to believe it! With every horse that was heard and every step to the front door, they would run yelling for their father. But it was never him…he would not be returning.

The whole house was grief stricken and Becca came to River often, falling into his arms needing his strength and comfort. River understood she had lost not only her beloved sister, but her husband she loved but it was still hard for him. River missed his friend too. Harrison and River had been friends for years. His friend had just gotten married and was smiling again!
River felt it should have been him to die and not Nola or Harrison. No one would grieve for him. He was alone in this world and this poor woman, his beautiful Becca, had suffered two devastating deaths so close together. Mac and Mazie walked the house like the ghosts and needed a good amount of attention.
He wanted to scream…to curse. But he must be the rock for this family, the steadfast one. This family he had sworn to keep safe needed him. River closed his eyes remembering Harrison’s last words to him.
‘Now brother, you take my place until I return.’
But he would never return.
Mazie clung to River and would only go to sleep in his arms then be put to bed.

River and the family continued to stay in his tipi as he rebuilt the roof of the house. River gave Tuck his room in the barn. There were more than enough rooms for the rest of the hands who survived in the bunk house.
Days moved by as if they were in a thick fog. The land dried, chores were done, fences mended and cattle fed and branded. Tuck finally sat down with River and told the whole story.

Apparently this was an ill fated trip from the beginning.

Tuck told River of rattlesnakes, streams too deep to cross and repairing the broken axle on the chuck wagon causing loss of time and energy. Tuck shook his head when he talked of the storm and the twister. In Kansas there was nowhere to hide and tornados love open plains to run amuck. River talked for several hours with Tuck.

Finally Tuck brought out the oiled pouch of money and River locked it in the safe. He would deal with that later. At least the cattle were sold and Tuck was loyal to bring the purse back. 

Mac and Mazie started their schooling with Becca but little progress was made. All of them were too buried in grief to concentrate on lessons. The almost daily visits from neighbors and Preacher Paul started to dwindle as rebuilding took over.

Things came to a head when the lawyer showed up from Lamar on a Monday afternoon. He had received written confirmation from the sheriff in the nearest town to the place of Harrison’s death. He also had confirmation of the other eight. The lawyer sat drinking coffee in the living room as Becca and River sat with him.

“Are you two ready? I need to read you the last will and testament of Harrison McGann.”

River looked at his hands as Becca nodded.
“Best be getting’ on with it then.”
 

Of course Becca inherited everything with a plea from her dead husband to still love and care for his children. Becca hugged them to her. Of course she would…that went without saying.
Harrison stated he had dreams of wanting Mac to take over when he was grown if he wished.
If not, there was money set aside for him to do with as he willed. He also left a sizable dowry for Mazie. Becca guessed that Harrison had come from a rich family but never said so.

It was the added codicil at the end of the reading that set off sparks and shocked River. The lawyer shifted in his chair unhappy having to read it out loud. The lawyer rubbed his neck.
Becca pursed her lips and demanded he read it.
“After all, Harrison loved River like a brother. They were the best of friends and had known each other for years before I ever showed up.”
The lawyer nodded agreeing and began to read. Harrison had made the request that River marry Becca if anything happened to him. He listed his reasons and pleaded with Becca to at least think about it. Somehow Harrison knew River loved her.

Harrison trusted River with his life, his ranch, his children and now his wife. He knew it was asking a lot of River but he stated that he knew what he had started would be cared for and would thrive in River’s hands. Becca would be protected and his children would have a father they could love and respect. The lawyer looked disgusted at River.
“I tried to get him to reconsider but he was damned adamant! I don’t know why he would trust you to care for his wife and children but he was in his right mind so I couldn’t eliminate it from the will. He trusted you and loved you Still River! God knows why!”
Becca was speechless she was so shocked and she could tell so was River. He blinked at the lawyer like he wasn’t quite sane. Becca sniffed looking distressed.

“When…when did my husband make this change in his will, sir?” The lawyer sighed.

“It was just two weeks before he left on the cattle drive. He came to my office to get his papers for the cattle witnessed and he sat down and made the changes then and signed them.”
The lawyer shrugged and sipped his coffee.
“Harrison even laughed about it saying Still River would probably kill him if he found out but he felt River would be a better husband and father than he was. But he certainly loved you as a brother Still River. He told a few stories about how you had saved his hide more than once. Yes, he certainly respected you and looked up to you. Respected you enough to ask his widow to marry you and take his children as your own.”
Mac stormed into the study and yelled.
“No! I don’t want another Pa! Why did it have to be him? Huh? Why? I can run the ranch now! I don’t need Uncle River! Why couldn’t it have been him instead of my Pa in the ground? Why?”

Becca stood shocked at Mac’s outburst.

“Mac! That’s awful! Take that back!”
Mac choked a sob turning and ran from the room. Becca looked at River and wiped her face. “I’m sorry River. He didn’t mean it. It’s the grief talking.”

River shook his head.

“Yes. Yes he did, Becca. He meant it…because I wonder that too.”
Becca could see River’s hands begin to shake and he rose to get to the kitchen and away from prying eyes. He poured more coffee in his mug and sipped it by the stove. What he really wanted to do was scream out a cry and slam the mug against the wall.

How could my friend ask this of me? I was crazy enough to think I could marry Nola and look what happened. Did Harrison really think that Becca would want me? Marry me? She could never love me! She loved you Harrison! I would forever be the intruder in their lives. The children even seem to hide from me now.

River looked up and saw Becca at the kitchen doorway. She could see his eyes burning with sadness as he turned and walked out of the house not looking back.
 

The next week River took the money from the cattle sale and paid the hands. The money that was to go to the other drovers was kept separate in case they found out about some family they had. River checked the books and balanced the ledgers and gave Becca the accounts balance and what he would recommend to spend and when.

Since the cook was killed in the storm, Becca now had to cook for four other men who had agreed to stay and take orders from River. They lost one due to River being an Indian.
Tuck became the new foreman and River depended on him for his advice for the cattle. Tuck liked River so he had no trouble working with him and welcomed the extra cattle and horses from River’s lands with his brand.

River took the place by the hand and made slight changes to make it more profitable. But he left the vegetable gardens in Becca’s charge. She was the genius behind their vegetable profit and it gave her something to set her mind on besides her loss.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN

River sat on a bench in front of his tipi watched the stars each night feeling more lonely than ever before since the roof was finished and Becca and the children moved back in the house.
He would stare at the sky and finally give up and go into his tipi feeling more of himself slipping away each day. His loneliness was consuming him.
He knew he could run the ranch, but now the children avoided him and Becca rarely spoke to him. He missed her sassy mouth and bright smiles and the children’s laughter and hugs. And especially, he no longer had his brother, Harrison.

It became a habit when River could not sleep, he would seek out Nola’s grave. Becca thought at first it was from sorrow, until one autumn night when she walked to Nola’s stream she saw him standing by the grave.

Hiding in the deep shadows among the Willows, Becca saw him sit by her grave and begin to speak to her sister.
“Hau Nola! Are you happy my friend? Yes. And that is what I was…a friend. Not your msn or husband. Not lover. You said you knew who I loved and told me. You were right. At first I refused to listen as men will do, but you were right my dear friend.
It would have been wrong to marry you when I wanted the other twin. Becca is the woman who took my heart from our first meeting. I knew the minute I saw her and you knew it too. You were not angry and for that I am glad.
You had very deep feelings for Seth Henderson didn’t you? I knew this. He would have been a good husband to you. I knew he had asked you to be his woman and I was happy you said yes. Seth’s heart was broke also when you left us. We have spoken together many times since you have been gone. He loved you very much.”

Becca wanted to cry but she held her hand over her mouth, afraid to listen more.
Nola loved Seth? Seth Henderson asked her to marry and she said yes?
And River loves me? Always had?