Becoming Madame Mao (17 page)

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Authors: Anchee Min

BOOK: Becoming Madame Mao
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Why did she want to shoot him?

Because he was flirting with a lowlife. Zi-zhen always goes after the lowlifes. They make good targets for the crack shot.

I run as fast as I can back to my barracks. I close the door and pour cold water over my face. I know it was not Zi-zhen. Zi-zhen is in Russia. The women, her students, are there to take revenge for her and for themselves. They all would be affected if Mao divorces Zi-zhen. If Mao is allowed to abandon his wife, so are the others.

At night the Yenan Pagoda is a silent sentinel. At dawn there is a sudden explosion. From her window Lan Ping sees half of the sky turn red. A half-hour later, Little Dragon knocks on Lan Ping's door.

What's the matter? She puts on her coat.

The Chairman ...

What happened?

His cave has been hit.

Is he all right?

He is fine, but the Politburo has to relocate. We are leaving. He sent me to say good-bye.

Good-bye? Is there anything else?

Good-bye and that's it.

Where is he going?

I have no idea.

You must know.

I am sorry. I was told to prepare a month's food for the horses.

***

He is working on a map when the girl comes in. She enters with the night air, hair jelled with sweat and dust. Her eyes are as bright as ever.

He puts down his pencil, pushes away his maps and walks toward her. I didn't expect an iron tree to bloom.

I have nothing to say. You have turned me into a winter. A terrible, terrible winter. She begins to cry.

Shall we visit the spring, then? He grabs a chair for her.

Her body trembles in his nearness.

Sorry I can serve you no tea. He passes her a bowl of water. The bombs have sent all my mugs into the air.

She takes the water and drinks it down in one swallow. She wipes her mouth with her sleeve.

Outside the guards are finishing loading the car. Little Dragon piles up the last documents, stuffing them into bags.

Moonlight shoots through the cracked ceiling. The brick bed is covered with dirt. His hands come to strip her. She pushes them away, but it doesn't stop him.

You debt-seeking demon, she cries.

Their limbs entangle. She feels his leaping and charging.

Like a dry chrysanthemum in a hot tea mug, she feels herself swelling and fattening by seconds.

I am a mythological pillar born to hold up the heavens, he roars. But without you I can only be a chopstick.

Down! Little Dragon shouts. It is followed by an explosion in the near distance.

Mao laughs with his pants at his ankles. Whoever you are, you missed me again! Japanese or Chiang Kai-shek! You smell the fun too? Oh, I love the shake of the earth, Chiang Kai-shek! You don't deserve your reputation! You have promised the world to wipe me out in three months. Look what fun I am having! You are a pregnant woman who screams about contractions but delivers no baby!

Is the Chairman ready yet? Little Dragon calls from outside. For his safety the Chairman has to move on!

Finally the lovers pull themselves out of the bed. Mao lights a cigarette and inhales deeply.

Outside Little Dragon hurries.

Shall we—? Before Lan Ping completes her sentence another bomb explodes. Half of the ceiling falls. Lan Ping screams.

Still like a mountain Mao keeps smoking. Little Dragon! he finally calls.

The bodyguards rush in. They pick up maps and blankets. Little Dragon throws the documents into a burning pan and collects Mao's last few books from the shelf.

Come with me? Mao asks the girl.

In tears she tells him that she can't possibly think straight right now. She needs time to decide.

Come on, the horses are impatient.

I ... She is unable to make herself say that she first wants a promise.

Are you coming or not? Mao extinguishes his cigarette and stands up.

But Zi-zhen ... she manages to say.

Mao cries, For heaven's sake! You have looted my heart! Rock by rock you have taken my cities down! Grace me, girl, I promise to make you as happy as you have made me.

In choking smoke Lan Ping watches the last plate of documents burn into ashes. Mao takes off his coat and covers her shoulders. He escorts her into his car while Little Dragon and the guards trash the cave. They tear down all the curtains, smash the furniture and water jars. They shout, We'll leave you nothing, Chiang Kai-shek! Absolutely nothing!

Sitting beside her lover the girl is touched by the operatic quality of her life. Events transform in front of her eyes. On the stage of her mind, Mao becomes the modern King-of-Shang and she his lover, Lady Yuji. She sees herself follow the king. Ever since she was a little girl it has been her dream to play Lady Yuji. She was a devoted fan of the opera
Farewell My Concubine.
She loves the moment when Yuji stabs herself before the king to prove her love. The character is in her beautiful silk gown, wearing a hat encrusted with pearls.

11

I
T IS IN MAO'S CAVE
that the girl learns politics. She learns that Chiang Kai-shek has recently increased the price for Mao's head. It frightens her and at the same time flatters her. She learns that Japan's invasion has deepened and China's provinces have been falling into the enemies' hands one after another. She learns that not long ago one of Chiang's generals, Zhang Xue-liang, initiated a rebellion during which he took Chiang hostage and brought him to the Communists. The Communist Politburo intended to kill him; Mao, however, proposed a negotiation.

It's a good opportunity to show the masses that our benevolence is beyond any personal grudge, Mao says, setting his eyes on pushing the Communist Party toward acceptance as China's major political force. In exchange for his life, Chiang agrees to resist Japan and unite with the Communists.

At home, Mao gains control over the Politburo. He selects his own cabinet members and attacks those who try to adopt the Russian formula over his guerrilla style. Using the Politburo's name he rids himself of his political enemies, the Moscow-trained Wang Ming and Zhang Guotao, by assigning them to remote posts. To his soldiers Mao continues to preach his own interpretation of Marxism and Leninism. His booklet
Eight Laws and
Three Disciplines
is printed on a hand press and distributed to every soldier.

Mao makes laws but he doesn't expect himself to be disciplined by them. In mid-1938, stories of his betrayal of Zi-zhen spread widely. Mao's partners, Zhou En-lai and Zhu De, advise him to put a stop to his affair with the Shanghai actress and go back to his wife.

My lover continues to see me regardless of the pressure. I am a monk without hair—I am the law—he says. Our affair is fueled by the force to break us. Mao is a rebel by nature. In me he finds his role. Nevertheless I know what I am risking. I am nobody in Yenan. I could be removed any time in the name of the revolution.

So I run from the trouble. I move back to the barracks. I don't wait to be "assigned" to a remote post. I have already learned the style of punishment within the Communist Party. I take action before the Politburo seizes me. I must make my lover work for his pleasure. Our love has to be put to the test.

The girl leaves Mao a letter saying that his career and reputation are all that matter to her. The Chairman tries to keep his composure, but gradually his strain shows—he has a hard time performing his job. His feet were burned by the foot-warmer stove and his curtains caught the candle flames. He has been losing his temper in Politburo meetings. His decisions are not sound. He often beats the table with his fists. He complains that documents are too messy and telegrams don't make sense—he is not himself anymore.

She doesn't go back. She wants him to go on. She wants him to see her in every corner, in his tea cup, on his maps and telegrams. Later on he tells her that he saw more. He saw her inside his young general's mosquito net. During those days, his chest swelled. The ache was pushing out everything else that was there.

***

One night when the wind is strong with furious gusts, my lover drops himself at my door. I tell him that I have made up my mind never to see him again.

Please stop coming, I say.

He is quiet. After a while he asks me to take a walk with him.

I refuse.

He starts walking.

I hesitate, then my feet follow him.

The riverbank path leads them into deep reeds. After a half mile she suddenly pivots, says that she can't go on, that she has to leave. Like a lion to a deer he catches her and picks her up from the ground. She struggles to free herself. He becomes intense. His hands tear at her uniform.

You can't do that! She pushes him. Not anymore!

But she opens herself. Leans over him, lies in his arms. She spreads her legs, weeps and melts in his heat. He caresses her, murmurs, groans and wails madly. She lets her body tell him how much she misses him.

Everyone expects me to be a stone Buddha without desire or feelings, he gasps on top of her. My comrades would like me better if I were a eunuch. But I am a tiger who can't be a vegetarian!

***

1938. Mao is finally acknowledged by Moscow. In September the Communist Party opens its sixth convention with Mao as the chairman. The Russian advisor shows up and announces the abandonment of Stalin's old friend Wang Ming, Mao's rival and the head of the Party's right-wing group. The advisor pronounces Mao Moscow's new partner.

The news hits my friend Kang Sheng as a surprise—he has been a loyal follower of Wang Ming. They were classmates in Russia. After coming to Yenan Kang Sheng has tried hard to gain Mao's trust, but people haven't forgotten his past. On September 14, in an extended meeting investigating Wang Ming, Kang Sheng's name is repeatedly brought up as Wang's partner in several political crimes. The Politburo is set to have Kang Sheng removed.

The goat-beard man sits in the meeting as if sitting on a carpet of needles.

It is at this moment that Kang Sheng receives a crucial piece of information that turns the danger into a blessing. A telegram from Shanghai is sent by the Party's branch officer Liu Xiao. It is a report of an investigation ordered on Lan Ping during her imprisonment in October 1934. The report states that Lan Ping had denounced Communism and is thus a traitor.

Although she has not caused any harm to the Party, the behavior is serious enough to destroy her chance to marry Mao.

During the contemplation of this telegram, Kang Sheng sees his own future dawning.

Evening dissolves. The cave is filled with smoke. Kang Sheng has been smoking. Lan Ping sits by his desk reading the telegram. Her face is pale.

This is a conspiracy, a setup, she cries. Where is their proof? It's jealousy. They are jealous of my relationship with the Chairman! She gets up but suddenly feels short of breath and she falls heavily back into the chair.

I am not here to discuss whether or not they have proof. I am sure they have. Kang Sheng speaks slowly and looks directly at Lan Ping. The problem is what will happen when the Politburo sees this. You will be suspended—it doesn't matter what the truth is. You will be interrogated and expelled, if lucky, from the Party. If not, shot. The Chairman will be in no position to defend you, neither will I. You know my job. The procedure. You are too big a target.

The sweat begins to seep through the roots of her hair. She wants to argue but her mind has gone blank. She stares at the ceiling and feels her senses paralyzing.

Master Kang, she calls him as if he were still the principal of Zhu-Town Elementary. I love the Chairman more than anything. I beg your help.

Kang Sheng doesn't respond for a long time, then he sighs, expresses his difficulty, describes how he has been attacked at the meetings because of Wang Ming. Only Mao can prove my innocence, he hints.

She grabs the deal. Taking out her handkerchief she wipes her tears. I'll see what I can do about this. I'll talk to the Chairman for you.

She keeps wiping. Her face, neck, shoulders, arms, hands and fingers. And then all over again. I'll say that the boss was Wang Ming. You did what he had ordered, didn't you? It was he who tried to kick Mao out of power. You can produce evidence, can't you? Should I say that you in fact had tried to protect the Chairman? Would it be exaggerating to say that you have suffered a great deal of Wang Ming's resentment?...I am sure I can get a word from the Chairman for you.

Kang Sheng is satisfied. Color returns to his face. Comrade Lan Ping, I promise that I won't let this telegram travel an inch farther.

Peace comes out of war, my lover teaches me. Life is paid for by death. There is no middle ground. There are times when we have to make decisions. Doubt is the substitute word for danger. It is better to clear the way than call out a question when unsure who is approaching. You have a lot to learn from Comrade Kang Sheng.

I am learning. He can appear kind, delicate and even vulnerable, but behind the mask it is the face of death. The truth of a bloodsucker. That's how he earns the position as Mao's chief of security. Mao appreciates his quality and style. Mao says that he and Kang Sheng are in the business of goodness. I sense a peculiar side of my lover's nature. It is his ability to deal with suffering. It is what makes Mao. I am learning. The killers with Confucius's appearances. I am learning. The way one wins China.

These are the two brilliant men in my life. Two men who created who I am and I them.

***

The pressure from the Politburo continues. The lovers have gone underground. She has stopped going to the Saturday night high-ranking officials' parties. Dancing as a form of exercise and socializing is the new game in town. The wives are pleased with the disappearance of the actress.

But beyond the public eye and at prearranged times, driven by passion, the actress delivers herself to Mao. She lays herself in his bed on stormy nights and chilly dawns. Afterwards, he asks her to sing from their favorite opera,
Vermilion Pearl Plant.
When she does he becomes lustful again.

Like a high-born maiden
In a palace tower
Soothing her love-laden
Like a glowworm golden
In a dell of dew
Scattering unbeholden
Its aerial hue
Soul in secret hour
With wine sweet as love
Which overflows her bower

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