Begin Again (Beautiful #2) (8 page)

Brody’s mouth crushed mine and while my brain shouted at me to stop, my body responded the only way it ever would when it came to Brody. His tongue traced the seam of my lips and I opened up for him, allowing him to explore the contours of my mouth. His hand came to rest at my nape, while the other cupped my hip and pulled me closer to him. What we were doing was wrong, but I couldn’t rationalize it that way when my heart believed it was right.

Everything else around me disappeared as my blood started humming in my veins, making me feel feverish. Brody moaned into my mouth and in that moment it felt as if he was breathing life into me. I inhaled, swallowing his scent greedily, silently begging for more. But I knew
more
with Brody would never be enough. I’d learned that very early on. I had no doubt that his kiss alone made my panties wet and slick with desire. My breasts grew heavy and tender, aching for his touch. It had been so long and my body knew it. I experienced a total loss of control around Brody, which only made stopping that much harder. It was when his lips left a hot, moist trail down my neck that reality came crashing down. What was I doing? I pulled away, breathless with swollen lips.

“You shouldn’t have done that,” I said, my voice shaky and quiet.

“I wasn’t the only one enjoying it,” he retorted with a smirk. My hand came up, poised to slap him, but he grabbed my wrist before I could.
“Now now, there’s no need for violence.”

“That’s rich,” I bit out, suddenly angry. “It’s okay for you to punch whoever you want for no Goddamn reason, but when I want to then I’m being violent.”

Brody leaned in close, our noses touching. “He had it coming.”

“So did you! What possessed you act like such an asshole, Brody?”

“Like you’d believe me.” His voice softened, as did his eyes.

“Try me,” I replied, “because from what I saw, you hit him because you felt like it!”

He had the decency to look sheepish when he replied, “I thought he was…hurting you.”

I snatched my hand out of his grasp and took a much-needed step back. My head was swimming from our heated kiss and the anger I started to feel bubbling its way to the surface.

“Hurting me? Are you fucking kidding me right now? He was
tickling
me!”

Something on Brody’s face changed and his expression became unreadable. It was unnerving. I’d always been able to read him, no matter what expression was on his face. The face looking back at me was blank, and I hated it. More than I’d ever admit, even to myself.

“Forgive me for wanting to
protect
you,” Brody sneered. My kiss-induced haze had completely evaporated and only white-hot fury remained. Who the hell did he think he was?

“You lost your right to protect me,” I said harshly, glaring at him. “You walked away and it was Jeff who was there when you weren’t!”

Brody’s face fell and for a brief moment I felt the need to take the words back. If only taking words back was enough to erase our past. Nothing with Brody and I had ever been that easy.

“
I will
never
stop protecting you,” Brody ground out. “God Himself couldn’t stop me.”

“God might not, but I sure as hell will!”

With that, I brushed past Brody and walked back into the house without a backwards glance. I was upset, and I squeezed my eyes shut to stop the sudden onslaught of tears threatening to spill. I found everyone in the kitchen and when I walked in their gazes landed on me. It made me uncomfortable, like I was under a microscope, and I immediately worried that they knew what Brody and I had been doing outside.

Grayson had cleaned Jeff’s face, but he was still holding a dishcloth under his nose.

“Are you okay?” I asked Jeff, feeling both concerned and embarrassed.

“Yeah,” he replied. “Did he leave?”

I looked down, and nodded, unable to look him in the eye. I was afraid that my kiss with Brody was written all over my face.

“Did he say anything to you?” Huntley asked. She was leaning against the kitchen counter, arms crossed over her chest. Brody’s grandparents stood to the side, but they were also watching me with a keen interest. If anyone in the room knew if something happened with Brody it was them. Apart from Grayson and Huntley, Luanne and Clay Scott had also become family, and even after Brody left I remained close with them. Close enough to have them know what happened when Brody left. Close enough to trust them to keep it from him. Jeff and I stopped by the ranch so that he could show me what plans they had for the land, since Grayson and Jeff had each bought a third of the property. Brody’s grandparents would live on the property for the rest of their lives, and the ranch would then stay between Brody, Grayson, and Jeff’s families. They were family anyway, so it made perfect sense. Of course, we hadn’t been expecting Brody and his new girlfriend to show up.

“He…” I hesitated, squirming uncomfortably where I stood, “he said he thought Jeff was hurting me. That’s why he punched him.”

             
“What did you tell him?” Jeff asked. His voice carried a hint of agitation and I couldn’t tell if it was with me or Brody he was agitated with.

“What do you think?” I asked, not doing anything to hide my own sudden irritation. “I told him the truth.”

“Is he still here?” Grayson asked. He stood up and looked ready to throw his own punches if Brody was still on the ranch. It was a rare occurrence, if not non-existent, to see him want to punch his best friend.

“No,” I replied, completely exasperated. “And what’s with the inquisition? It’s not my fault he hit Jeff!” I turned around and walked back outside onto the porch. I needed some fresh air and there was nothing better than inhaling country air. The land in front of me went on for what looked like miles and the setting sun provided an exquisite landscape. It really was beautiful. I’d always imagined living here with Brody, surrounded by our children and horses and blue skies. It had always been my dream, my fairytale. But like most little girls who dream of such things, I’d lea
rned the hard way that fairytales are nothing more than child-like ideologies.

The screen door closed behind me and I looked over my shoulder to find Brody’s grandmother, Luanne, watching me. She came to stand beside me and started out at the open space in front of us. I had a tremendous amount of respect for this woman. She was short, with a slender build, but like most women from her generation, she was a force to be reckoned with. When Brody’s parents abandoned him, his grandparents were tasked with raising a very angry six-year-old boy who had a jaded perception of what life was like. He’d been damaged and yet somehow, amongst all the rubble left behind by his parents, Luanne and Clay had managed to give him a stable, loving home. It was because of t
hem that he’d been the man I fell in love with during college.

“You want to talk about it, sweetheart?” she asked me quietly. Something in her voice was knowing.

“I just…” I stopped. I didn’t know how to tell her how I was feeling when I didn’t know myself. When I continued, my voice sounded small and again I hated that it was because of Brody and how he made me feel. “I didn’t mean for any of that to happen,” I gestured to the door, “I didn’t know Brody was going to be here.”

“No one blames you, sweetheart, but that’s not what I was referring to.”

I frowned. “Then what did you mean?”

“I meant the reason you looked so flustered back there.” Her mouth tipped into a small smile and I knew I’d been caught. She saw me kissing Brody.

“I…” I snapped my mouth shut. I couldn’t explain my way out of this one and there was no way I would ever lie to Luanne. She laughed briefly before turning her worldly eyes to me.

“It’s alright, sweetheart, I won’t rat you out. I just want you to be smart, and think about the other people you could hurt while you’re trying to make sense of things between you and my grandson.”

“There’s nothing between me and Brody,” I replied quietly.

Luanne touched my hand in a reassuring gesture and I had the feeling I wasn’t going to like what she was going to say. But I listened anyway because I trusted her.

“I’m old, but I’m not blind,” she chuckled. “You and Brody will find your way to each other again. You might be a little lost right now, but in the end, he’s your destiny, as you are his.”

“What makes you so sure?” I asked curiously.

She looked away momentarily, lost in thought. “Almost forty years ago, I was you and Clay was Brody. We lost our way but I knew in my heart of hearts that he was my past, present and future.”

“What happened?”

“We weren’t ready,” she replied thoughtfully. “We still had to become the people we needed to be to make each other truly happy. We met other people and after three years of messing around with those relationships, we realized that it all began and ended with us, me and Clay. There was no one else in the world for me.”

“And you think it will work out that way for me and Brody even after everything that’s happened?”

“Sweetheart, nothing will keep you apart if it’s meant to be. Clay drives me crazy and we fight like hell on wheels, but I refuse to live without him. You can live without Brody, but when you decide don’t
want
to live without him, then it will all fall into place. In the mean time, be careful you don’t hurt Jeff in the process.”

I shook my head and replied, “I would never hurt him. We’re just friends.
”
“Does
he
know that?”

“I’m not sure what you mean.”

“Sweet girl, that man in there,” she pointed in the direction of the kitchen, “is so in love with you and he has no idea that your heart is still unavailable.”

I was about to disagree when the screen door opened. Huntley stepped out.

“I’m sorry, did I interrupt?”

Luanne smiled. “Not at all, Huntley dear. We were just talking.” She winked at me and squeezed my hand. “Give it time sweetheart, Rome wasn’t built in a day.”

She disappeared inside and left me alone with Huntley.

“Everything okay?” she asked. I was getting tired of hearing that from everyone but I knew it came from a good place.

“No,” I replied honestly, “but it will be.”

She nodded and I was grateful when she didn’t press the issue. She knew I’d talk to her when I was ready. I just needed some time to sort out everything in my head, especially Luanne’s last observation about Jeff being in love with me. I still hadn’t decided how I felt about it.

“Are you still okay with looking after Hunter tonight?” Huntley asked.

I smiled. “Of course. I can’t wait.”

“Great,” Huntley replied. “We’re getting ready to go.”

“Alright. I’ll be right behind you.”

Jeff decided to get a ride with Grayson and Huntley and while it stung that he was angry with me, I used the drive home to think. It was time I started sorting out the mess in my head.

Grayson had been broody for the rest of the afternoon and I could tell he was still brewing over everything that had happened at the ranch. We’d dropped Hunter off at Demi’s house for the night, and Jeff had taken off to visit his parents. It was supposed to be our last romantic night alone before the wedding and Grayson was sulking.

Our house was quiet for the first time in months and while the sound of Hunter’s laughter filling every room brought me so much joy, I was looking forward to spending some much-needed alone time with Grayson. I walked into the living room and found Grayson watching some sports reruns. I sat down beside him on the sofa and curled into him.

“Can I make you something to eat?” I asked.

“Whatever you feel like is fine with me, babe.”

I rolled my eyes and stood up. “You know, Gray, sulking isn’t a good look on you.”

I walked to the kitchen and started pulling out some ground beef and pasta to make lasagna. After a few minutes of silence, I felt Grayson standing behind me and he wrapped his arms around my waist. He kissed my neck and murmured, “I’m sorry.”

I turned around and faced him, our bodies pressed together. “It’s okay to be mad,” I replied, “but I’d rather you talk to me than stay quiet.”

He sighed. “It’s just frustrating to be stuck in the middle all the time.”

“I understand,” I replied. “I just think that Demi and Brody are dealing with a lot and as their best friends we have to help them any way we can. After everything Demi went through this past year I can’t imagine how difficult it is to see Brody again, especially knowing she’s keeping so much from him. Your brother is unfortunately caught in the crossfire.”

“What if Demi hurts Jeff? Then what?” I understood Grayson’s concern for his brother, and I couldn’t say that I wasn’t worried either. The entire situation was far more than complicated and someone was bound to get hurt.

“Your brother is a big boy,” I replied with a small smile. “No matter what happens, he’ll be okay. This is between him and Demi.”

“And Brody.”

“They’ll work it out,” I said. “Now can we please enjoy our night alone?”

Grayson’s eyes flashed and he grinned. “You’d better get dinner started then. You’ll need your energy because I have no intention of sleeping tonight.”

A shiver of anticipation moved through my blood and coiled in my belly. I stretched onto my toes and brought our mouths closer until they were only inches apart. “Me neither.”

WE ATE DINNER and while Grayson cleaned up downstairs, I decided to take a shower. I was expecting to feel anxiety or even cold feet now that our wedding was days away, but all I felt was peace. I had no idea my life would end up at this point the day I met Grayson but I had no regrets and the thought of spending the rest of my life with him, watching our children grow, thrilled me to no end.

I settled under the hot water and as I started washing my body I heard the shower door open. I turn my head and smiled when I saw a very naked Grayson step in. “Can I help you?” I asked, my tone light and teasing.

He smirked and my knees almost buckled at the sight. God he was sexier now than the day I met him, which I didn’t think was possible.

“I don’t know,” he replied, feigning incredulity. “I was looking for my hotter-than-hell fiancé. Maybe you’ve seen her? Blonde hair, stormy blue eyes, body that can bring an entire army to its knees?”

I shrugged. “No, I don’t think so, but I’d be more than happy to help you with whatever it is you need.”

I turned my body towards him as he stepped closer and let out a gasp when he picked me up. “I’m not sure,” he nipped at my lips, “she can never know.”

I smiled, squirming when the tip of his rigid cock pressed at my entrance. “I won’t tell her if you won’t.”

“It’ll be our little secret.” He groaned and pushed into me. I sucked in a harsh breath at his welcomed invasion and
felt my body adjust to accommodate his generous size. We’d done this countless times, in every position and on every surface of our house, but every time I had him inside me felt like the first time and it only made my crazier. Hungry for more.

“You always feel so good,” he murmured. He pressed me against the wall and as his hips started thrusting faster and faster, I dug my nails into
his back and hung on like my life depended on it. I knew it was going to be an intense ride. It was never anything less with Grayson.

“H
arder,” I whispered harshly, relishing in the way our bodies slid up against each other. Without hesitation, Grayson surrendered to the wild, inhibited craving we have for each other and started pumping his hips fast and hard. My orgasm hit and left me breathless as I bucked wildly against his hips. My toes curled and I tightened around his hot length, squeezing until I knew he was close.

“Fuck,” he bit out, chasing his own orgasm.

“That’s the point,” I laughed, still catching my breath.

His brows furrowed and his hands gripped my hips to the point I was sure it would bruise. The way he held me so tightly, yet so reverently did crazy things to me. His orgasm
ripped through him and the potency was enough to trigger a second orgasm for me. This time we screamed together and found ourselves floating into oblivion.

Grayson’s eyes found mine, despite the spraying water, and in them I saw my present and my future. He gave me his lazy post-orgasm smile and said, “I can’t wait to call you my wife.” If I could, I would’ve pulled him closer to me, but we were already as close as we could possibly be. There was no more space between us.

“And I can’t wait to marry you,” I replied.

He kissed me then, like it was my breath alone that gave him life, and for the second time in my life, my heart left my body and jumped right into Grayson’s.