Behind the Altar: Behind the Love Trilogy (14 page)

Leah walked around
with a smile on her face in the days after she and Dean met in the loft. She
wondered when they might be able to see one another again, alone. As the work
progressed, someone was always at the barn or garden, and Leah didn’t attempt
to be alone with him again. She knew what would happen, and her guilt about
Jacob overcame her desires on most days. The nights alone in her bed at Susie’s
were the worst.

When she saw Jacob
for their next weekly Sunday dinner, she barely touched the salad he’d made.
She left as soon as she could and went back to Susie’s house. She knew she
wasn’t spending time thinking about their relationship because Dean was always
there in her mind. Whenever she remembered Dean’s breath on her hair or his
hands and tongue in her private places, she became wet and tense. How could she
think about marrying Jacob when all she wanted to do was peel Dean’s shirt off
his tanned and tight chest?

She saw Dean daily,
but he also kept his distance most of the time, except in those moments when he
passed her a hammer and let his fingers linger for longer than necessary, but
there were always people around them as the deadline for finishing the barn
loomed.

Tommy Jackson wrote
the first story the week after he visited the church. His words and Simon’s
photos created a personal picture of the Deer River folks. The article covered
the Church’s vote to let Leah continue with Soup’s On. It drew so many people
from the surrounding areas to volunteer that Leah assigned Carol and Joshua the
tasks of handling the extra hands.

Donations of lumber,
paint, appliances, bedding, and food needed to be stored. Leah worked with the
VA in Jacksonville to see that anything they couldn’t use went somewhere else
in the state.

Leah and Dean both
were grateful that Tommy agreed not to mention Dean’s public identity in the
article, but Dean promised that after the barn was built and running as Leah
wanted it, he’d give Tommy an exclusive interview with Harold Grant and his
transformation from tat king to farmer.

“This is beyond
anything I ever thought would happen,” Leah told Susie one night on the rare
occasion when Leah came home before dark. “It’s incredible to see all my dreams
come true. So many people want to help. When I first arrived, I think most of
Victory thought I was a nuisance.”

“No one ever thought
that,” Susie said. “We’d never seen anything like you before. Are you sure all your
dreams are coming true? What’s going on in your love life?”

“Everything’s on hold
until the barn is finished.”

“What about Dean? You
two practically drool over one another whenever you’re together. How in the
world could you marry Jacob when you’re so obviously in love with Dean?”

Leah knew her face
was turning red, but the light was fading, and she hoped Susie couldn’t see the
blush.

“Dean is working very
hard on the barn. We don’t talk much.”

“I bet. Reggie says
he hardly ever sees him at the Tavern. That doesn’t make Sally Jean very
happy.”

“Sally Jean? Are they
going out?”

“I don’t think so; I
know she’s hanging out at the bar more than I’d like. She’s also hanging those
boobs out more than is necessary, too.”

“Are you jealous?”

“Of Sally Jean and
Reggie? I guess I’ve wondered if he’d be tempted, but Reggie’s always been true
blue. It did make me wonder though when I found out he’d been with Mable the
night Dean ran off. He’d never told me about the two of them, and after Mable
died there was a lot of talk about her.”

“Maybe it didn’t mean
anything to him, so he didn’t mention it.”

“Sure, that’s what I
thought. I hope so,” Susie said. “I’d hate to think I’d picked a guy just like
my daddy. He would be wiping the bar with Sally Jean’s bra.”

“Was he really all
that bad?” Leah asked.

“He was that bad. And
worse, he never tried to hide it from Mom, Lisa, and me. He deserved to die the
way he did. I don’t say that about anyone, but I hated that man. It really
messed Lisa up. She’s never had a relationship last past a month or so.”

“Then it’s all the
better that you’ve found someone like Reggie,” Leah said. “Can I ask you a
question?”

“Sure.”

“How did you know you
loved Reggie?”

Susie looked over at
Leah who kept her head down waiting for the answer.

“If you’d ever been
in love, you wouldn’t be asking me that question. Or you could be asking
because you think you love the wrong person.”

Leah rocked for a few
minutes, thinking about Susie’s response. “I guess that might be true.”

As Leah lay in her
bed trying to fall asleep that night, she kept seeing Dean’s face before her
telling her how beautiful she was. When she tried to imagine Jacob looking at
her in the same way and saying the same words, nothing came.

The light of the full
moon streamed through her window. Susie told her she was welcome to put up
blinds or curtains, but she’d been so busy it hadn’t been a priority. As she
turned over toward the wall, she wished she’d driven over to the Dollar General
store on the outskirts of town to find some mini-blinds. She rolled out of bed
and found the pair of jeans she’d worn that day. She pulled a long sleeved
shirt out of the closet and put it on over her tank top. She slipped on her flip-flops
and looked in the mirror. She ran the brush quickly through her long thick
mane. She smiled at her reflection and grabbed her purse off the dresser.

When she reached the barn,
she pulled up to the doors, but when she got out of the van, she walked past
the barn and straight to the motor home. The lights were off, but Dean’s bike
sat next to the door. She knocked so softly she wondered if he’d even hear her,
but within a few seconds, the door opened and there stood Dean, naked.

“I thought that might
be you,” he said as he pushed the door open fully to let her in. “Or let’s say
I was hoping it was you because you’ve been keeping me up all night.” He
pointed to his penis standing at full attention as she came into the motor home.

She didn’t say
anything. She kneeled down in front of him and took him in her mouth, gently
sucking and pulling while he grabbed her hair and pushed her head closer to
him.

“Where the heck did
you learn how to do that?” he said when she finally stood, and he caught his
breath.

“I dreamed it last
night,” she said. “And I couldn’t wait to see the results.”

He picked her up and
could barely turn around in the small space, but he managed to throw her down
on the rumpled sheets of the bed where he’d been tossing and turning only
moments before.

He reached down and
unsnapped her jeans and helped her snuggle out of them. While he fiddled with
the condom, she tore off the shirt she’d hastily put on before coming to him
and within seconds she was a naked as him. He lay down beside her and pulled
her over on top of him. She straddled his hips and began doing a dance,
flipping her hair over his face and chest as she swayed on top of him. He
grabbed her hips to still them long enough for him to enter her.

“If you’re going to
be moving like that, I better be inside of you,” he growled, as she lowered her
face to his neck.

“And if you’re inside
of me, you’d better be kissing me like this,” she said as she took his lower
lip between her teeth and pulled before settling down on his lips and pushing
her tongue inside.

Later, while lying in
each other’s arms, they finally slept.

When Leah woke in the
morning, Dean was making coffee. “I thought we could take a cup and go for a
walk down by the river,” he said. “I’ve been doing that every morning before
the workers get here. It clears my head.”

“Sounds wonderful,”
she said as she took a mug from him and sipped from the hot brew. “I don’t
usually get to the church until after nine. What time is it?”

“You’re almost late,”
he said. “We slept in today. I guess we needed it after that work out.”

“I can take a few
minutes to enjoy the cool morning,” she said. “It’s not like I have to dress up
to go to work.”

With mugs in hand,
they walked toward the river as the birds sang and flew from the treetops
before the heat of the day settled over the land. Florida in the summer brought
a lassitude to all living things in the morning. They sat on a rock on the
banks and listened to the river as it flowed slowly. Softly and gently, nature
surrounded them as they sipped their coffee and held hands.

“What are we doing?”
Leah asked. “Why can’t we stay away from one another?”

“It seems it was you
who can’t stay away from me, little lady,” Dean said in an imitation of John
Wayne in a B Western.

She slapped at his
arm. “You know what I mean.”

“I’ve told you how I
feel,” he said. “It’s you that seems to have some hesitation, although I have
no idea how you could do what you did to me last night and still go ahead with
a marriage to Jacob.”

Leah felt her heart
skip a beat, and she felt a chill. She stood up.

“I need to leave.
I’ll put my cup on the steps.”

She turned and walked
away from him. She felt as if a cold bucket of water had been thrown over her
head. She must be losing her mind to think having sex with Dean would solve everything.
She owed Jacob more than that.

Dean watched her walk
away, her hair swaying on her back as the sun caught the lighter streaks. Her
hips moved side to side just as they’d done last night when she was on top of
him. He wanted to chase after her, but knew there was no use. He flung the
remainder of his coffee toward the river and got up to go take a shower. He
loved her, but he was beginning to get tired of her games. It was almost as if
she was teasing him and using him. All the while, she strung Jacob along as if
she was going to marry him one day. He snorted as he walked. I’m done with that
bullshit, he thought. No more. She needed to make a decision, and she needed to
do it alone, despite how she made him feel.

He’d done his best to
stay away from her for an entire week after they made love the first time. He
thought if she missed him, it would make a difference. Obviously, she just
wanted to use him. He knew the routine. In fact, he’d been the one to perfect
it for so many years with others.

The appliances
arrived later in the day, and Dean helped put everything in place on the
clay-colored tile floors that had been laid in the kitchen area the week
before. A double stainless steel refrigerator with a separate full-size freezer,
a six-burner stainless steel stove with grill, two separate matching ovens, and
an industrial-sized dishwasher completed the kitchen. Leah would have plenty of
storage and cooking space. Dean pushed thoughts of her aside as he pushed,
shoved, and leveled the large appliances. He left before she came back in the
afternoon. He didn’t want to be there when she saw another piece of her dream
fall into place. If he wasn’t a part of that dream, he didn’t want to witness
her pleasure.

Instead, after he
finished work, he showered for the second time that day and hopped on his bike.
He decided that some beers and conversation with Reggie would help him forget
how he’d spent the night before.

When he came into the
dusty tavern smelling of stale beer, it was empty, except for Reggie. Dean’s
shoes stuck to the floor as he crossed to the bar. He noticed chairs turned
over on the floor and tables pushed against the wall. Reggie kept better house
than what Dean saw here.

“Rough night?” he
asked as he picked up a chair and set it straight.

“Full moon,” he said.
“I haven’t had a chance to straighten up. Susie and I had a rough night, too.”

Dean raised his
eyebrows, but he didn’t ask any questions. If Reggie wanted to share, he would.
Dean pushed back the tables and chairs.

“Where’s the mop?” he
asked when he came into the kitchen where Reggie and a young man were starting
the evening’s food preparation. “That floor out there is a mess.”

“Back there in the
storage room.” Reggie pointed to a hallway off the kitchen.

Once Dean had mopped
the floor, he pulled a draft from the keg and sat on a stool in the kitchen.
Reggie was chopping onions.

“Opening late today?”
Dean asked.

“As you can see no
one’s beating down the door,” Reggie said. “Business is slow, but I usually get
folks filtering in by six for dinner. I open up at three o’clock most days for
low-lifes like you, even though you’ve been a stranger here for awhile.”

“Thanks, from one
low-life to another,” Dean raised his glass in a toast. Reggie raised an
imaginary mug.

“That’s what Susie
thinks I am,” Reggie said. “Jordy, the onions are done. I’m going out front to
get the bar ready to open.”

Dean followed Reggie
into the bar area leaving Jordy, his cook, to prepare the rest of the food for
the night’s crowd.

“I know it’s true,
but why does Susie think you’re a low-life?” Dean asked once he settled at the
bar and Reggie started washing glasses still piled up from the night before.

“I told her and Leah
about being with Mable the night you left town,” Reggie said. “I told Leah so
she’d see what kind of person Geraldine is, but instead Susie took it to mean
more about me and my morals than anything else.”

“It was ten years
ago,” Dean said. “You weren’t even with Susie then, were you?”

“No, but she thinks I
should have told her sometime since we got together. I felt bad about Mable and
all, but it was a one-night stand. I didn’t think I had to confess those.”

“That’d take some
time to do, me and you both.” Dean grinned and held up his beer for a refill.
He chugged half the beer, and then started putting the tables and chairs back
into place.

“Is Susie still
pissed?” Dean asked as he worked.

“Yep, wouldn’t let me
stay there last night. She makes me so angry sometimes I could spit. Know what
I mean?”

“I hear ya, Reg. I
hear ya.”

“She’s even jealous
of Sally Jean now.”

“Sally Jean? What’s
she got to do with anything?”

“Susie thinks she
hangs out here too much, and by hanging out, I mean hanging out all over the
bar, if you know what I mean.” Reggie held his hands up to his chest as if he
was holding two melons.

“Women.” Dean shook
his head. “Who needs ‘em?”

“You know as well as
I do that we both need them,” Reggie said. “You might as well turn the sign on
to let the world know the Victory Tavern is now open for business. Can’t do a
damn thing about Susie until she lets me.”

Dean went to the wall
by the door and flipped a switch and all the neon lights in the front window
flashed on. He went back to the bar and finished his beer.

“Give me a shot of
Wild Turkey,” Dean said. “I feel the need to tie one on.”

Dean managed to eat a
burger after the fourth beer and second shot. No need to get sick as well as drunk,
he thought, as the image of Leah underneath him began to fade. A low burning
anger set up house at the back of his brain as the beer flowed down his throat.

The door opened,
bringing in some of the late day sunshine into the dark bar. Sally Jean sauntered
over to Dean’s stool and stood next to him pressing her breasts into his arm
with the snake tattoo. He turned to look at her in her Daisy Duke shorts and
red-checked blouse tied up close under her breasts. With the top buttons
undone, Dean could see the red lace of her bra barely keeping her boobs in
place.

“Haven’t seen you
here in awhile,” Sally Jean said as she brought her lips down to his cheek to
give him a kiss. “Thought you were upset with me for some reason.”

“How could I be upset
with you?” Dean turned to face her and brought her between his legs. “In fact,
it should be me apologizing to you. I was a fool to walk away from you the last
time.”

“I know how you could
make up for it,” she said as she put her finger in his beer and then put her finger
in her mouth slathered with red lipstick.

“I bet you do. How
about a shot of Wild Turkey first?

“Sounds like a plan.”

“Reggie, my man, set
me and this gorgeous woman up for shots and keep it flowing,” Dean said. “In
fact, just leave that bottle over here.”

After a few shots,
and more than a few suggestive comments and tugs on her shorts, Dean stood up
and pulled Sally Jean off her stool. She staggered slightly in her three-inch
wedgies covered in denim, but he grabbed her around the waist.

“Come with me,” he
said.

He led her into the
storage room where he’d gotten the mop a few hours earlier. She began unbuckling
his belt. He unbuttoned her blouse and buried his face in her breasts.

He grabbed her rear
end and pulled her close, as he kissed her neck.

“Leah,” he whispered
into Sally Jean’s hair.

Sally Jean jerked her
head back. “Did you just call me Leah?”

“No, that’s
impossible,” Dean said as he began to sober up. “I slurred my words. I meant to
say Sally Jean.”

She looked at him,
and he stared back seeing her for the first time since they came into the back
room.

“Silly me,” she said.
“I don’t why I thought you said that weirdo’s name.”

She tried snuggling
with him again, but he pushed her away.

“Sally Jean, I can’t.
I can’t do this.”

“Not again, you
bastard,” she said. “I can’t take this, Dean.”

“I’m sorry. Here,
button up your blouse.” He reached for the top button, but she slapped away his
hand.

“Don’t you touch me.
You really did say her name, didn’t you?”

“We’ve been working
at the barn together. I guess she’s been on my mind.”

The slap came
swiftly, giving him no time to block the palm of her hand when it landed on the
side of his face.