Beneath the Palisade (24 page)

“You know, I’m not even sure you know what you’re frickin’ doin’ with these babies,” Allison slurred, thrusting out her chest and squishing her own boobs to make her point. “What the hell are you going to do with
those
?”

“Care for another shot, honey?” Spencer passed the phone to Andy.

“Sure, why the fuck not? What?” She punched Spencer in the arm and then cackled until a severe nasal snort silenced her.

Harper laughed. This was a side of Allison he hadn’t seen before. Pocketing his phone, he poured himself a beer and signaled for the server to stop by.

“We’ll have another pitcher. Allison, another butter shot?”

“What?” It was clear to the table Allison had met her match when paired up against the syrupy, butterscotch-flavored liqueur. “You guys suck. I mean… for real… you guys suck.”

“That means yes,” Spencer clarified. “So, are you officially ending the search for your north shore B&B?”

“It doesn’t look good.” Harper looked over to Ian for his response.

“I don’t want you assholes to move. I’m dead serious.” Allison banged the table with her fist, spilling at least two of their beers.

“Easy, hon.” Spencer flicked his wife on the arm.

“Shut up, I don’t. I can say it. I don’t want you adorable assholes to move. There, I said it again!” Allison, changing up her pitch, accentuated her point by sticking her tongue out at her husband.

“We haven’t been able find the right house on the right piece of property.” Ian ignored Allison’s drunken admission. “It’s been one or the other. A great house with a shitty location, or a shitty house and a great location. But it was fun looking. And you guys,”—Ian filled his glass back up—“Tiffany was great to work with. She’s really a cool lady. And now that she has a good idea of what we were looking for, she’s agreed to stay in touch and call if something comes on the market we’d be interested in.”

“And maybe we get lucky enough to have champ here on the team for another season.” Andy raised his glass in a toast.

“Hey! Dude—”

The toast was interrupted when a man, obviously intoxicated, approached their table.

“Dude, I know you. You’re the dude that was shot. You’re the attorney dude who was shot. Guys, this is that dude I was tellin’ you about.” The drunk stumbled into Harper’s chair as he waved for his friends to join him.

“Man, what’s it like to get shot, huh?”

“I got this.” Before anyone could respond, Andy was up and out of his chair. Grabbing the guy by the back of the neck, he forcefully escorted him toward the door. Spencer stood to make sure the guy’s buddies didn’t have any ideas about interfering.

“Honey, go make sure Andy is okay.” Allison looked like she was going to cry. Spencer left the table but was back in a matter of seconds with Andy right behind him.

“Drunk dude sends his most sincere apologies,” Andy reported as he and Spencer sat back down at the table.

“That’s a first. And I hope a last. Thanks, guys.” Harper felt embarrassed to have been the cause of the disruption sidetracking their celebration.

“Stupid dickhead!” Allison downed her shot. “Hey, let’s go get a pizza.”

“Hon, we still have a pitcher of beer.” Spencer displayed his full glass.

“Okay… okay… you win. I never win.” Allison slumped down in her chair.

Harper fished his phone out of his pocket when he felt it vibrate. “I wonder who this could be. Oh, speak of the devil, it’s Tiffany. This is Harper,” he answered, covering his ear. “Tiffany, can I call you right back? I can’t hear you. Okay, I’ll call you in a minute.”

“What does she want?” Ian asked.

“I don’t know. I couldn’t hear her very well. I’m going to step outside for a minute and call her back.”

“Drunk dude was staggering around in the parking lot when we left him. He shouldn’t be a problem, but if he is, let us know and we’ll take care of it.” Andy looked over to Spencer, who gave him a thumbs-up. Allison had folded her bar napkin into a lopsided star.

Stepping outside, Harper couldn’t help noticing how humid the night had gotten.
I bet we see a good thunderstorm tonight.
He punched the Callback button on his phone and waited for Tiffany to answer.

“Harper?”

“Hey, Tiffany. Sorry about that. We’re having beers with some friends, and the bar is really noisy.”

“I could tell. Wish I was there with you. I’m up to my elbows in paperwork. I don’t want to keep you, but I’m calling because I think I may have stumbled upon a property you guys might be interested in. I know we decided to table the search for a while, but this, well, I think you should come and take a look.”

Harper could hear the excitement in her voice. “Tell me more.”

“Well….” Tiffany hesitated. “Here’s the deal. I’ve been doing this long enough to know how a buyer’s mind works. I’m going to ask that you trust me on this one. I don’t want you guys to start dissecting and analyzing this until you’ve had a chance to see it first.”

“Okay.” Harper laughed. “That makes sense. Let me talk to Ian. I’m game, and I’m sure he is too. We’ll need to take a look at our schedules.” Harper looked over at the adjacent parking lot. He spotted his drunk friend leaning up against a pickup truck.

“Sounds good. I’m busy, but I’ll rearrange my schedule. Call me tomorrow after you guys have had a chance to talk.”

“Perfect. I’ll call you tomorrow. Bye.”

“Go back and party. Bye.”

Harper glanced back to the lot. Drunk dude was nowhere in sight.
He’s probably passed out under his truck.

“What was that all about?” Ian asked when he’d sat back down.

“A casualty?” Harper pointed at Allison, who was leaning against Spencer’s arm, fast asleep.

“She’s gone to the land of ten thousand butter shots.” Spencer smiled. “She’ll rally if we get something to eat later.”

“Tiffany has another property she wants us to look at.” Harper slugged down half his beer.

“Really?” Ian belched loudly.

“Nice. Yeah, but she won’t tell me anything about it. She asked that we trust her on this one.”

“Can I go?” It appeared Tiffany had made quite an impression on Spencer.

“Back off, tiger,” Ian cautioned. “When does she want us up there? I’ve got a busy week, but I can juggle a few things around.”

“I’d like to juggle a few things around.” Spencer wasn’t giving up.

“Look at this piece of work.” Andy cocked his head toward the team captain, “His wife’s passed out, and Straight Cat’s titty hunting.”

“I’m curious is all.”

“We’ll talk when we get home.” Harper downed the last of his beer. “I told her I’d call her back in the morning. I’m hungry.”

“Whattaya say?” Andy looked around the table. “Should we grab a pizza at Luciano’s?”

“Pizza!” Ian let rip another award-winning belch.

“Let’s do it.” Harper signaled for the tab. “My turn to treat.”

“I’ll pick up the pizza,” Spencer countered. “Honey, we’re leaving. We’re going for pizza.”

“Where are we?” Allison bobbed her head when Spencer gave her a shake. “I told her it wouldn’t fucking fit. Oh….” Placing both hands on the table, she opened her eyes, surveyed the table, and vomited between her legs.

“
T
IFFANY
, please, please tell me this place is located on top of that big rock. Ian, can you imagine the view from up there?” Harper opened his window, sticking his head out for a better look.

“Actually,”—Tiffany put on her blinker and slowed the car—“the property is located beneath the palisade.”

“I’ve been to the top of the palisade.” Ian squeezed his head between the two passengers in the front seat. “The view is amazing.”

She turned off the freeway onto a dirt road. “Don’t get all jiggy with me. The road’s in rough shape, but that’s fixable.”

Did she say jiggy or jiggly?
Harper made a note to run that one past Ian when they were alone.

“It’s so pretty back in here. I love all the birch trees. Let’s see, if I remember right, we go around this curve and… voila!” The realtor gunned the car, surging it up a small hill before stopping in front of a faded tangerine-and-white building. “Gentleman, I present to you the Palisade Beach Cabins.”

Harper was speechless.
Is she kidding?

“Follow me.” Tiffany stepped out of the car and waited while he and Ian joined her. “This is the office. Down, closer toward the water, step over here, you can see better from here.” He followed Ian over to the spot where she was pointing. “You can see the first couple of cabins. There are ten total stretching along the shore until the palisade begins. I know it’s not what you originally had in mind, but as I got to talking with you, I thought maybe—well, I thought this had some potential if you were willing to expand your idea.”

Ian looked at him and giggled.

What did that giggle mean?

“Let’s walk down toward the water so you can get a better view. I have a key for the office. We’ll check it out when we come back up.” Tiffany, not waiting around to see if her plan was approved, pointed her guns toward the water and was off.

A busted-up concrete walk led down toward the cabins. Harper stopped in his tracks when the lake came fully into view. “Wow!”

“Wow!” Ian echoed. “Look, Harper, the units are right on the lake.”

“That’s, that’s very cool.” The view was stunning. The best they’d seen so far.

“Okay, as you can see, these cabins need some work. Well, a lot of work. But I think the cost to renovate would be comparable to the expense you would incur remodeling one of the older Victorians we’ve looked at. Maybe less, depending on how fancy you want to get.”

“Any chance we can look inside one of these?” Harper’s mind was racing a mile a minute.

“Yes, sir, but walk with me a little further before we go inside. I came down here yesterday. This is so cool.”

Like a goose and her goslings, Tiffany led the way. The concrete walk stopped at the first unit. They walked on a combination of grass, weeds, and ferns. The cabins were spaced well apart. “I like how these things are spaced.” His comment was met with silence. “Ian, what do you think about the spacing?”

“Yeah….”

Hmm, lost in our own little world, are we?

“If we walk down here toward the shore… this is it. Isn’t it amazing?”

Ian gasped.

Standing in front of the last unit, the palisade towered majestically above them. Billowy white puffs of cloud floated overhead, contrasted by one of the bluest skies he’d ever seen. The slow-roaming clouds made it feel like they were moving. “This is one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever seen. I’m just amazed. Isn’t this great, Ian?”

“Yeah….”

“I have a key for the first unit and the office,” Tiffany announced. “Let’s go have a look. In their heyday, each of these cabins would have had its own grill,” she explained as they worked their way back.

Harper reached for Ian’s hand, holding him back. “Tiffany, we’ll meet you up ahead in a minute.”

“Sounds good.”

“So, how’s this going over? I can see some possibilities. Where are you at?”

“I feel like crying.” Ian looked away.

“Hon, what’s wrong? Don’t worry about me. If this isn’t working, we’ll just tell her. We don’t have to stick—”

“It’s working on every level for me. Harper, this place is magical.” Ian turned and gestured back toward the palisade. “I’m…. I don’t know what else to say. I see gardens. I see a walking path down by the water outlined with plants. Flower boxes on the cabins and pockets of formal gardens, each having its own theme.”

“You don’t see dead people, do you?” He couldn’t resist the jest. Ian was so serious, so overwhelmed by the property. “Come on, sport. Let’s rejoin the tour.”

“Hey there.” Tiffany was all smiles. “It’s musty in here but not as bad as it was yesterday. I opened the windows while I toured the property.” She held open the screen door as they entered the first cabin. “These aren’t laid out that much differently than a standard motel room.”

The inside was roomier than he’d expected. A small table with two chairs occupied the spot in front of the main window. Behind it was a frame for a double bed. Someone had made the wise decision to remove the mattresses when the place was closed down. The bright orange shag carpeting was garish and painful to look at.

“Behind the bed is the bathroom. Take a look. They’re small. A stool, sink, and a shower unit. Nothing fancy. By the way, you like the carpet?” She made a sweeping gesture at the floor.

“I love the carpet. Not!” Harper rolled his eyes. “Who wants shag carpet in a cabin?”

“Tell anyone this and you die,”—Tiffany chuckled—“but I had the same crap in my bedroom when I was in high school. It matches the rust in the bathroom.”

“Yeah, what’s up with that?” The dark patches of stain disgusted him.

“It’s the water. There’s so much iron in it. It’s a constant battle up here. You can control it if you use the right cleaning product. I have to be honest, I’m not really up on my stain control methods. But I’m sure there’s a remedy. Anyway, the units are kind of cute, don’t you think?”

“Yeah.”

“Don’t mind Ian. He’s kind of… verklempt.” Harper reached over and fluffed Ian’s hair.

“I hope that’s a positive.” Tiffany held the door while they exited. “You haven’t asked about the price yet.”

“I’m too scared.” He reached over for Ian’s hand. “There’s a lot of land here. I wonder what a developer could get if they cleared this place out and put up new homes. I’m sure the seller has thought that one through.”

“Yes, they have. Sorry, no price details until we’ve finished the tour.” The realtor locked the door, and together they walked back to the office.

She knows what we want to spend. Something’s up here.

“I found out yesterday, talking to the guy who represents the seller, that there are two reasons this place closed. What might be the obvious reason, the one that first came to my mind, was the road construction that occurred a few years ago. When they put in the tunnels, the tourists avoided the area like the plague. Unfortunately, access to
this
place during that period was so difficult nobody wanted to bother with it. But that’s not the biggest reason. During the same time, the owner lost his wife. With her gone, he just gave up.”