Betrayed (Soldiers of Darkness MC Book 2) (14 page)

I grin, ‘cause, yeah. I’m fine with that. But there are conditions. ‘You can do what the hell you want with each other, baby.’ I rest my hand against her neck, my mouth almost touching her ear as I speak. ‘As long as I can watch.’

She slides her hands up under my T-shirt, her fingers grazing my skin, then she moves them lower, sliding them down my jeans, grasping my cock tight and, man, I’m trying so hard to control this shit now. ‘You want a private show?’

‘You bet your beautiful ass I do.’

She bites down on her lip as she strokes my cock, and I just wanna ram it into her, right here, so I slip a hand up under her skirt and push her panties to one side, and she knows what I’m doing. She unzips me and I lift her up, lowering her down onto my throbbing cock and she wraps her legs around me and takes me, Jesus, I fucking needed this!

I’m calm the second I’m inside her. We’re in the middle of a crowded bar, the music’s thumping, vibrating all around us, but I close my eyes and hold her tight and make like we’re the only two people here as I thrust into her. And it don’t take long, ‘cause as I’m fucking her I’m picturing Cora with her tongue buried deep in Izz’s pussy; I’m imagining their naked bodies together, playing with each other, just for me. Jesus fucking
Christ!
I wanna watch my wife making out with another woman so bad it tips me over the fucking edge and I bury my face in Izzi’s shoulder as I come, and she clings onto me and wraps those legs tighter around me, so tight it’s like she ain’t ever gonna let me go. And I’m fine with that…

Izzi

‘Couldn’t wait ‘til we get home, huh?’

I pull my skirt back down over my thighs amd stay backed against the wall, his face breaking into a grin as he leans in to me, running his thumb lightly across my cheek.

‘Sometimes a man needs an instant hit, darlin’.’

I look up into his eyes and cock my head slightly, catching his hand as it rests against my face. ‘What you said about me and Cora…?’

‘I’m serious, princess.’

Is he? I’m not sure. I still think he’s hiding something from me, and I think he’s trying all ways to distract himself from whatever that is.

‘You’re OK with a woman touching me?’

‘I told you, baby, I’m fine with that. ‘Cause you’ll be doing it for me, in front of me,
for
me.’ He rests his mouth against mine and smiles, his hand pressing harder against my cheek. ‘You’ll fuck her, then I’ll fuck
you
.’

‘Not her?’

He shakes his head and kisses me hard, his body crushing mine, and I grip his fingers tight. ‘I don’t want no-one else, baby girl.’

‘Zeb…’

‘You gonna do this for me, darlin’?’

Am I tempted? Jesus, yes! I love Zeb, I really do, in fact, if I’m being completely honest with myself I think I’m falling more in love with him every day. That’s happening now, I really think it is. But there’s a part of me that aches to be with Cora. And Zeb’s giving me permission to do that. He just needs to watch. And I’m OK with that.

‘You really want this?’ I whisper, running my fingers over his rough jaw line.

‘I really want this.’

I smile, and he grins, and I feel a twisted excitement rise up inside of me.

‘Go get your friend, darlin’. We’re going home.’

Zeb

Sure I seen girls make out with each other before. It’s almost a daily occurrence at the clubhouse, but I don’t want this to be some seedy public show. My wife ain’t no biker mama, and what she’s doing for me, it ain’t for no-one else’s eyes but mine.

I told them to go get ready, to do whatever the hell it is they need to do to get started while I get myself a beer, but as I head back to the bedroom I feel a strange sensation in my gut. I told her I was fine, that seeing her with a woman was OK with me, but now I’m about to witness that and I ain’t entirely sure I
am
gonna be OK with it. But then I kick open the door and, man, the sight that greets me is like every brother’s real-life wet dream.

I throw myself into a chair and take a long draft of beer, watching as Izzi straddles Cora, leaning over to kiss her in a way that’s got my cock hard in a heartbeat. She’s naked and beautiful and when she kneels up and Cora pulls her hips towards her, pulling Izzi apart with her thumbs, I continue to watch as Cora just looks at her for a few beats, her fingers gently touching Izzi and, man, her moans are freakin’ killing me! That sound is making me crazy, and then Cora leans forward and pulls Izzi’s hips further towards her until her face is buried in her pussy, and there ain’t ever been a girl-on-girl show made me feel like this. Someone else is touching my wife and I really am OK with that. ‘Cause that someone ain’t Mack fucking Slayer…

Izzi

I close my eyes and lean back, my hands on Cora’s knees as her tongue licks me and probes me and when she pulls me wide apart and slides it inside me I cry out as a wave of pleasure floods me. And I know Zeb’s here now, I can hear his breathing, heavy and ragged from the back of the room and that just excites me even more. My whole body shudders as Cora licks me out, and I jerk against her as I feel that wave intensify, getting ready to crash over me. But then she pulls out, and the cry that escapes me this time is one of frustration, I was so fucking close, and the ache in my thighs is verging on painful now. But I know she’s just prolonging the game, for our sake as well as Zeb’s. We don’t know if this is going to be a one-time thing or if it’s going to be something my husband needs on a regular basis. So we’re making the most of it.

‘You gonna let me watch?’ Cora murmurs as she flips me over onto my back, slides a pillow under my hips and spreads my legs wide. ‘When he fucks you? ‘Cause you know he’s gonna, don’t you?’

I smile and reach out and cup one of her breasts, sitting up slightly to suck on a nipple, relief once more flooding me as my tongue slides over her skin. ‘That depends on him,’ I breathe, gasping quietly as she palms my pussy, pressing against it, the heel of her hand pushing on my clit and I shiver. ‘He might not want an audience.’

‘And what about
you
, huh?’

My hips jerk up slightly as she pushes her fingers inside me, and I hear Zeb groan again, and I want him. I want to feel
him
inside me now, that’s how messed-up this is going to get. I want Cora to finger-fuck me and I want Zeb’s cock in my ass, yeah, that’s how messed-up this really is. But Cora, she knows me, she can read me, and she knows what I need. She ain’t afraid to play this game.

‘Hey, Zeb.’ She doesn’t take her eyes off me even though she’s speaking to him. ‘Wanna join in, handsome?’

I feel the pillow being ripped away from underneath me and Cora pulls me over onto my side, but she keeps her fingers inside me, and I move my leg so it rests on her thigh. Because Zeb’s behind me now. He’s still got his jeans on, I can feel the denim rough against my skin, but his torso’s naked. And he’s warm and hard and I close my eyes and lie back against him as his fingers lightly stroke my ass. The anticipation is both painful and exciting as I wait, my belly full of butterflies and a dangerous ache, and I reach back and touch Zeb’s thigh, breathing him in. And then I feel his fingers slide over my asshole, and another shiver wracks my body as his cock slowly pushes inside, just the tip at first, but with Cora’s fingers still inside my pussy it’s an almost overwhelming feeling. She’s sucking my tits and finger-fucking me gently and as Zeb pushes his cock deeper into me from behind, his hand resting on my thigh as he pulls me further back against him, I feel my head start to spin. I feel like I’m being pulled back from this whole experience, made to watch it from the sidelines. And then Zeb whispers something in my ear, and I’m suddenly yanked back to the reality of the situation. And as he pushes all the way in I cry out as a tiny jolt of pain takes over, only to be followed almost immediately by the most incredible wave of intense pleasure; I haven’t felt anything like it before. Zeb and me, we’ve done some twisted shit in our time, but a threesome was never something we’d even thought about. But now it’s happening…

I reach back and find his hand, our fingers intertwining, and I wrap mine tight around his as he thrusts gently into me, and I feel Cora’s tongue circle my nipple, her thumb roll lightly over my clit as she pulls her fingers out of me and slides four back inside. I’m full, I can’t take any more. And the crazy, red-hot mess happening in my gut is both beautiful and wrong and I throw my head back and cry out as I start to feel a wave so big begin to engulf me, and there’s a part of me that’s scared; terrified of what this is going to do to me. To us. To me and Zeb and everything I thought we had.

And he comes first, I feel him gushing out inside me, and as Cora presses hard against my clit that pushes me over that precipice and I explode into what feels like a million pieces. I’m crashing and burning and everything around me is spinning, and for a second or two I feel like I can’t breathe, but then I feel Zeb’s arms around me and I’m calm. And he holds me as everything starts to come back together; as my breathing slows down and my body sags against his. And I feel Cora kiss me as she pulls her fingers out of me, running her hand across my slit one last time before Zeb withdraws and pulls me over to face him.

I’m aware of Cora leaving the room, of the door closing, and I open my eyes and look at Zeb, and everything feels a little different somehow.

‘I love you, Izzi.’ He sits up and I straddle him, wrapping my legs around him. And I know he loves me. I know he means it, and even though he can still scare me sometimes, I love him too. I don’t think he’d ever hurt me. He said he just wants to protect me, and I believe him.

‘And I love
you
,’ I whisper, because I can barely get the words out, I’m still exhausted from what’s just happened. My insides feel like they’ve turned to jelly and my head’s a mess. And I still think he’s hiding something from me, but I also know it really isn’t wise to push him on that. ‘What did we just do, Zeb?’

He runs his fingers up and down my spine and I shiver again as he pulls his knees up to cocoon me against him. It all feels very normal, what’s happening here. Very ordinary, if you forget the threesome that just happened. And there’s a part of me that wishes we were in a normal world living a normal life but I know that if I want Zeb – and I do. I want him. So I don’t think I can have normal, not anymore. But this – this feels normal. And I’m clinging onto that.

‘We had fun, Izzi.’

I smile and run my fingers through his hair, leaning in to kiss him, and he holds me, and I’m still terrified that whatever it is he’s hiding from me – I’m scared that it could be putting him in some kind of danger, real danger, not just the usual shit these men get involved in. And suddenly the thought of something happening to him fills me with a fear I thought I’d learned to control. After Aiden I’d swore I didn’t want another relationship – I didn’t want to fall in love again, with anyone, but especially not someone I could lose in the blink of an eye. That’s why I’d walked away from Mack. But I really do think I’m falling deeper in love with Zeb, and given the kind of man he is, the risk of losing him – it’s high. And if there’s something he isn’t telling me…

‘Izzi…? Baby, you OK?’

I blink a few times to get my focus back, because I’d drifted there. And the last thing I want is for the nightmares to return and the doubts to swamp me. So I nod and smile and he holds me, and for a little while everything’s going to be all right…

Chapter Nine

Mack

I’m no longer President of the Soldiers of Darkness, and all I feel is a sense of relief. Yeah, there’s a part of me that feels like I’ve let Cooper down, walking away from a role he thought I’d be able to deal with. And I could. For a long time I was a good President, because I was focused. I let nothing get in the way, it was my life. My whole fucking world. But things change. People change. Circumstances change. And I ain’t focused no more. Not on being President. All that shit just don’t seem to hold the same importance to me that it did before. Does that make me weak? A couple of years ago I would’ve said yeah, it does. Men like me don’t throw away being President of a club like the Soldiers of Darkness. But that’s what I’m doing. And I’ve just handed it to a man who took the only thing that matters to me now, but I did that because I think he’ll be better for this chapter than I ever can be right now. I did it for the good of this club. Am I secretly hoping that being President will take his focus off Izzi? I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t hoping for that, I ain’t gonna sit here and be a hypocrite. But I haven’t given Zeb the President’s patch purely because I want him distracted. I still care about this club and what happens to it, even if I am planning on walking away. I truly think he’ll do a much better job of running this place than me. OK, so he probably won’t move it away from its outlaw roots, but that’s fine. I don’t plan on being here too much longer, and I ain’t President no more, so, whatever happens here, it’s all on his shoulders now. His choices. His decisions.

‘What the
fuck
are you doing?’

Izzi’s face, man, she’s pissed as hell as she strides towards me, and I throw my cigarette down on the ground and drop my gaze for a second, digging my hands into my pockets.

‘You’ve stepped down as President?’

I slowly look up and her eyes meet mine and, yeah, I still want this woman more than I want any President’s patch. ‘Zeb didn’t hesitate in accepting his new role, darlin’.’

‘Why, Mack? I don’t understand… I thought this club was everything to you…’

‘It was.’ I shrug, and she looks confused now. ‘It
was
. But I just can’t do it no more.’

She sits down on the wall opposite me, her shoulders sagging, she looks almost defeated.

‘You don’t wanna be Queen of the compound, huh?’

She glances up at me and her eyes – they’re all cold again, they ain’t looking at me with any warmth in them. ‘I shouldn’t even be here. I shouldn’t be talking to you…’ She trails off, and for a second or two she looks like she’s drifted into some kinda trance, but then she shakes herself back to the here and now and makes to go, but I reach out and touch her arm, and she pulls it away from me like I got some kinda contagious disease. It’s a reaction I wasn’t expecting and it shocks me a little, so much so that I actually take a step back from her.

‘Whoa there, sweetheart! I ain’t gonna hurt you.’

She stares at me again, and this time there’s a hint of fear in her eyes. ‘He said he’d kill you, Mack. If you came near me. If
I
came near
you
. He said if you even tried…’

She trails off again, but I know what she’s gonna say. ‘You think I don’t know that, Izzi? You think I don’t know what he’d do if he knew I still…’

‘Don’t, Mack. Please.’ She shakes her head but she needs to know this. I can’t let her think I stepped down as President because I just can’t do the job no more. I can. I could. If I wanted to. But I don’t want to. I want something different now, something new, I don’t want this life no more. And I don’t think she does either. I’m not sure she ever did.

‘Where is he now, Izzi?’

‘He’s gone to the tattoo studio. He’s got appointments this afternoon… Look, I… I don’t know why I came back to see you, I mean, what am I doing? Putting your life in… Mack, he’d kill you, that’s what he said, and I believe him.’

‘I don’t want to fight him, Izzi.’

‘I don’t think he’s giving you much of a choice. Jesus, Mack, what’s happening here? Why did you step down as President? What the hell is going on?’

‘I don’t want it no more. Simple as that.’

‘I don’t believe you. There’s more to it than that, I mean, the way you’ve been lately…’

She drops her gaze and turns away and I don’t know what to say to her now. Do I tell her the truth? Do I test the water, see if there really is anything there? I gotta find out what I’m dealing with here.

‘Izzi I… I’m leaving. I’m walking away.’

She turns her head to look at me, and she’s still confused, and I don’t know whether this is the biggest mistake I could make, letting her know how I really feel. But she’s gotta know. Otherwise what the hell was the point of me handing this club over to someone else? To Zeb.

‘But I ain’t going nowhere without you, darlin’. When I walk out of this compound for good, you’re gonna be right there with me.’

Izzi

I feel like someone just dealt a cold, hard slap to my cheek. I don’t want him to say those words, I don’t want to hear them. He can’t do this, he can’t even
think
this, it’s crazy!

‘No, Mack. No…’

I turn away and head into the clubhouse, I feel safer in there. Outside we were alone, and I don’t want to be alone with him, that can’t happen.

I go into the kitchen, I need a glass of water. My throat feels dry and it’s because I’m scared. I know Zeb isn’t here, he’s at the tattoo studio, but if he suspects I’ve been alone with Mack, even for just the briefest of seconds, I know what he’ll do.

‘You don’t think I’m serious?’

My head shoots up and he’s there, leaning against the doorpost as though this conversation is normal.

‘I ain’t scared of Zeb, Izzi. Men like him – come on, darlin’, I been around ‘em for most of my life.
All
of my life.’

‘And you planned on taking their wives away from them, too?’

He laughs quietly and walks over to me, that cocky arrogance he showed when I first met him back with a vengeance, and I look up as he approaches, my stomach dipping so low I can’t catch my breath. But it’s fear that’s causing it, not excitement. I don’t want him this close to me because it’s dangerous. Because me and him were over a long time ago. Because I don’t
want
him, not anymore, but I don’t want him hurt, either. ‘Look at me, Izzi.’

My eyes lock with his but it’s still fear that swamps me. Still nerves that take over as he reaches out to touch my cheek but I push his hand away. I don’t want this. ‘It’s too late, Mack. And we’ve been here, we’ve done this, we’ve
talked
about this. It’s too late.’

He shakes his head and I just want him to go. I need him to go. ‘I ain’t giving up without a fight, not this time.’

‘I love Zeb, don’t you get that? Don’t you
see
that?’

‘A man who threatens death to any brother who looks at you wrong?’

‘Not
any
brother, Mack. You.’

‘He don’t trust me, huh? Or is it
you
he don’t trust, Izzi?’

He’s kind of pissing me off now. He’s got no right to do this, to tell me this shit; what does he want me to do? Fall at his feet like I’ve been waiting for this moment forever?

‘I didn’t ask you to do this, Mack. So please don’t make me feel guilty for…’

‘No, you didn’t ask me to do this. I did this because
this
is what I want now.’

‘You want to leave everything you’ve ever known behind?’

‘Only if you come with me.’

‘You can’t lay this on me, Mack, Jesus! I don’t
want
this…’

‘Does he scare you, Izzi?’

I frown, and my eyes are still locked on his but that anger’s rising. I really do want him to go now. ‘You need to leave.’

‘Does he scare you, darlin’? Has he placed a hand on your neck and got so far up in your face that you feel your stomach turn? Has he spoken words that confuse and excite you and make you terrified to say no to him?’

He reaches out to touch me again, and again I stop him from doing that. This isn’t going to work, things are different now.
I’m
different now. ‘I’m not going to put you through any more crap, Mack. I walked away and I did that because I cared about you. I didn’t want to hurt you more than I already had done, you deserve better than me.’

‘Don’t you think
I
should be the one who decides that, huh?’

I shake my head and step back from him. ‘It’s too late.’

‘You love him that much, huh? Despite everything?’

‘You know nothing about me and Zeb, Mack. You know nothing about our relationship, the way we feel about each other. And nobody’s saying it’s perfect or normal or anywhere near ordinary, but it’s real. And maybe it wasn’t in the beginning, maybe it’s taken me a bit of time to fall in love with him…’

‘Was he a distraction, Izzi? Something to take your mind off me…?’

‘You never did lose that arrogance, huh?’

He bows his head and I lean back against the counter, folding my arms as I drop my gaze.

‘I love him, Mack. And I shouldn’t have to apologize for that.’

I raise my head and his eyes once more meet mine, and I feel a pull on my heart I didn’t expect, and I take a deep breath.

‘I need to get away from here, Izzi.’

‘I can’t come with you, Mack. I can’t.’

He comes towards me, and I don’t push him away this time. ‘Do you really know him? Know what he’s capable of? The kinda man he really is?’

‘He’ll never hurt me.’

‘Is this what you want forever, huh? This fear, this worry that one day you’ll get a call telling you he’s…’

‘I need you to go now, Mack. Please.’

‘You aren’t the same girl that walked into
Laney’s
all attitude and anger. You don’t have those twisted dreams no more, you aren’t that same person, Izzi. You’ve changed, whether you realize it or not. You’ve changed. And so have I, neither of us are the same people we were a year ago. I thought I was, y’know? I thought I could get him back. But I can’t. And I don’t even know if I want to.’

‘Just go, Mack. Please. Before Zeb…’

He takes my hand, and I try to pull it away but his grip is tight. ‘You don’t want this life any more than I do now, darlin’. You just need to admit that to yourself.’

He drops my hand and walks out of the room, and I close my eyes and take another deep breath. And whatever that was, it isn’t going to happen again. It
can’t
happen again.

‘Izzi?’

I look up at the doorway, and Sam’s there now. And I can tell by his face he saw Mack come out of here. ‘Don’t tell Zeb, Sam. Please. If he thinks Mack’s…’

‘I won’t say a word.’ He walks further into the room, his eyes down on the floor. ‘Everything OK?’

‘You knew, didn’t you? What he was planning?’

Sam looks up, and he doesn’t need to reply, I already know the answer.