“Baby.” I didn’t jump this time when she appeared behind me.
I didn’t even flinch when her arms came around my waist. My gaze traced a line across the black floor as she gently turned me toward her. Still too afraid to close my eyes, I looked as high as her navel.
She couldn’t ask me for more than that.
“Don’t be angry with me,” she pleaded softly. “
Querida
, please.” For the first time, her heritage thickly coated her voice with emotion. It made me shiver.
• 193 •
reBekah WeatherspOOn
“I’m not angry with you,” I croaked.
“Then please tell me—”
“No. I can’t.”
“Why? You can tell me anything.”
At that moment, something in me broke. A string that ran from my brain to my heart, that had been tangled up in my courage and my soul, just gave way, making room for nothing but vulnerability and fear. And somehow that crack in my will gave me the power to invite Camila into my head.
Her eyes snapped wide the moment she was inside and even wider, shocked with the pain I was feeling and the horrible things I’d been imagining. She saw my dead mother lying against the white tile, saw how I pictured her own death, the way she had burned and bled. “Red.” She choked out a sob, the sympathy spreading across her face. For some reason, her reaction pissed me off. I took a step back out of her arms.
“Don’t do that,” I shouted. “You can’t do that, okay? I know I’m just some stupid kid with mommy issues, but what I feel for you is real. And it doesn’t deserve your pity. I know you’ve been through a lot of girls, but you mean more than that to me. Thank you for taking me out and claiming me as your mate, but we both know you don’t love me.”
“I love you. Let’s get that straight right now,” Camila said back. The feral tone of her voice and the anger that snapped into place on her face shut me up. “Damn it, this is going to sound bad, but you’re the reason I slept so hard this morning. For the first time in over sixty years, I got a real night’s sleep. Losing my children and Lino—it ripped my fucking heart out, Ginger. Don’t think for one second that you didn’t give it back to me because you did.
“I love you so much and I’ve only known you a week. I almost killed Moreland in a crowded restaurant just for looking at you, and that has nothing to do with sex or possessing you. I can’t stand the thought of anyone else making you laugh. It makes me sick to my stomach. The thought of someone else counting your freckles makes me want to punch a hole in the wall. I love you, no matter
• 194 •
Better Off red
how old you are, whether you’re immortal or not. I’m sorry about what happened this morning. I swear to you it will never happen again.”
“You swear? Because I can’t protect you. You have to protect yourself. I don’t care how tired or stressed out you are. I don’t want to lose you.” My eyes started to mist up. The admission of her love right on the heels of the very real idea of being without her, pushed the tears over the edge. It all happened so fast, but I truly did love her. “Yes. Jesus Christ, Red.” Her arms came around me again. I let her pull me against her body. The water slicked our skin making our nipples bud against each other. “I keep fucking this up. It’s been years since anyone cared what I did with my time, if I took care of myself. I’m going to stop hurting you.”
I leaned back, staying close enough for her to keep a hold on me. My fingers traced across her collarbone. Touching her made the goose bumps rise on my own skin.
“You haven’t hurt me. We just, we keep missing each other.
I’m assuming one thing and you’re assuming another. I know you know how to take care of yourself. You wouldn’t let yourself go out in the sun carelessly. I was just scared. I don’t want anything to happen to you. This is new for me, but it’s worse because you’re not just some girl in my class I have a crush on. I don’t know. Does that even make sense?”
“Yes. It does.” She gently lifted the ruby pendant off my chest.
“I have given this necklace to so many girls. Cleo is one of the few I would consider a true friend, but there have been others like her. There’s never been anyone like you, Ginger. Four years, grad school, fuck, even if you stay here for your PhD. I don’t want to let you go.”
“You curse a lot when you get worked up.”
“I know. I’ll work on that too.”
“How often do you need to sleep? Honestly.”
“I can get by on six hours a week, but twelve is better. The closer you are to a bourne-demon the less you need, but my human side does need some.”
• 195 •
reBekah WeatherspOOn
“I know you had a crazy week, but what in the hell were you doing the times I slept in your bed?”
She shrugged. “I got some work done. Thought about what the hell I was going to do with you.”
“Okay, well, will you please get some sleep for me, squeeze some nine or so hours in, here and there? And please let me know when you’re going to feed again. I know it wasn’t anything emotional with Amy, but it’s unreasonable to ask a girl not to get a little excited when you’re sucking on her neck. I’d rather not walk in on that again”
Her laugh forced me to smile. There was no helping it. “I promise. Will you let me in again?” she asked cautiously. I took a deep breath and nodded. This time I didn’t try to do anything, but I did feel her inside my head, a light pressure just behind my forehead. I twitched and winced a little. The pressure didn’t hurt, but something about another person occupying your brain while you’re fully conscious of it just didn’t feel right.
“It’s okay, baby. Just relax.”
I exhaled deeply and did my best to hold still. The feeling of the intrusion didn’t ease, but suddenly the painful images were gone, not for good, she silently told me, but for the moment. She slipped out just as quickly as she had slipped in. My mind was my own again even though her influence lingered. When I closed my eyes there were no memories of death, hers or my mother’s. Just calm, weightless darkness.
My eyes stayed closed when she kissed me, and I didn’t open them again while she washed my hair and rubbed down my body.
Afterward, she dried me off and carried me to bed. I kept my eyes closed the whole time, relieved that the next time I opened them, some four hours later, Camila was still wrapped around me under her black blankets, sound asleep.
• 196 •
Better Off red
Todd would not stop texting me. It was my fault. He’d gotten my text the night before and responded sometime between our run-in with Moreland and our ride up in the elevator.
He’d texted me back and told me that Mom had mentioned that I was officially “out,” but now he wanted specifics about my date.
And specifics about my girl.
I could have told him the truth, that my first date with Camila, my first date ever, had been amazing. I could tell him that right now I wasn’t in the library studying with my sorority sisters, because that wasn’t the truth. The truth involved me sitting on the floor in Camila’s lounge, nestled between her legs. My attention was split between the Colts/Pats game, a used copy of
Tess of the D’Urbervilles
, and my demon-angel’s soft kisses across my shoulder.
My first mission for the afternoon had been to avoid Amy and the girls and their barrage of post date questions, which I pulled off, thanks to Camila. God, I loved her even more. She gave me the keys to the Range Rover. In a borrowed pair of sweats and one of her signature black tank tops, I took a quick, covert trip back to the dorm to grab more clothes and my books. Her SUV could be recognized by any of the ABO girls, but it was way more likely that I would bump into Amy or Cleo on foot. I wanted to dish about my night and just how amazing Camila had turned out to be, but I had hours and hours of daylight to spend gossiping with the girls.
Camila was rested and had some free time before she had to get
• 197 •
reBekah WeatherspOOn
back to her role as demon enforcer and successful business owner.
If she wanted to spend the afternoon watching me read my English homework and studying my stats notes, there was no way I was going to turn her down.
After our talk in the shower, the reality of just how different my relationship with Camila would be hit me. And it left me exhausted, even after our nap. She had shown me a special side of her world and her personal life outside of Alpha Beta Omega. Parts I loved, like the toys and the hotel room. And parts of it made me nervous, psychos like Moreland and the danger of UV exposure.
Now I welcomed any moments of normalcy we were allowed.
Any moments where her demon blood, my waking nightmares, and nosy sorority sisters wouldn’t come between us. Spending the day lying low in her underground apartment seemed to take care of those intrusive factors, but they didn’t keep my brother from texting me.
The display on my cell phone lit up as it vibrated. I wanted to ignore it, but I couldn’t look away from the alert box in the center of the screen. I picked it up off the coffee table. He was satisfied I’d spent Friday watching movies. Now he wanted to know about my Saturday night. I loved Todd so much, but for once I wanted him to give a little less of a shit. I groaned, running my thumb over the screen. Camila hugged me tighter and kissed my neck. I pressed back against her even more. I loved feeling her warmth around me.
“What should I tell him?”
“What do you want to tell him, baby?”
I wanted to tell him the truth. I wanted to tell him everything, but that wasn’t going to work. It wasn’t my truth to tell. Not all of it anyway.
“I should tell him something about last night. He’ll keep asking about that.”
“Okay,” she said, trailing hands down my sides. My eyes slipped closed. It was so hard to focus on anything when she touched me. I swallowed and tried to unscramble my hormone-riddled brain.
Task one, get Todd off my back and off my phone. Task two, finish my damn homework, with my clothes on.
• 198 •
Better Off red
“And I want to tell him about you. Stop that.” Her fingers found their way up my borrowed tank top.
“Why?” Her fingers slid higher up to my bra.
“Because. I’m trying not to have sex with you. Until after I finish my homework.”
“Okay. Excuse me,” she said. Then she moved to stand up. I grabbed her hand before she got very far.
“Where are you going?”
“I’m going over there.” She pointed across the room to the armchair.
I shoved her hand back up my shirt. “You stay. Just keep it above the belt, Ms. Sanchez.”
“This would be a lot easier if you didn’t smell so fucking good.”
“Well, you’re stuck with me and my fuckable scent. What should I tell my brother?”
“Tell him you have an amazing girlfriend. And be sure to include a detailed description of how cute I am.”
“Fine. I will,” I said defiantly. I started texting. “Your name’s Mila. You’re a Mexican-American freshman from Washington, DC, studying business. You don’t have a Facebook account so I’m telling him not to bother looking.” I hit send then swapped my phone for my book, dropping my cell on the coffee table.
Her breath tickled my ear as she chuckled softly. I breathed in her delicious scent and gave myself over to her advances, only for a moment. I turned my head enough for her to kiss me. Our lips met and when her tongue slid into my mouth, I forgot all about Todd and my homework.
Until my phone vibrated again. I turned away from Camila with a frustrated grunt.
Brady sucks ass this season. Is she hot?
Todd’s text read.
“He wants to know what you look like. Are pictures banned by the master?”
“Sort of. Here.” She snatched my phone out of my hand and turned it around. “Say cheese.” I flashed my teeth just as she pressed the bottom. “Send him that.”
• 199 •
reBekah WeatherspOOn
Of course I looked like crap. Camila looked like she had just walked off a centerfold’s page, all sweet cheeked and pouty lipped.
She’d even managed to smile in the most adorable way that hid her canines. So unfair. If it had been anyone else but my brother, I would have demanded a re-shoot. Something else bothered me, though.
I twisted around so I could see her face.
“Are you sure you want me to send this? There isn’t some demon law about not showing yourself to non-feeder humans or something?” I did want Todd to know her, and I trusted him more than anyone. I knew he would never intentionally do anything to hurt me or Camila. But after our scare in the hotel, the last thing I wanted to do was put her at any sort of risk, even if she did want to meet my family.
She looked at me for a moment and gently tucked loose strands of my hair behind my ear.
“This is why I love you,” she said. “You call me Mila and that’s who I’ll be, whenever that’s what you need. And Todd will be safe.
And so will Linda. And your dad. And so will I. Yes, I have to be careful about some things, but I don’t have to hide from the people you love.”
“And what if they want to meet your parents at some point?”
“Well, Rodrick is well-versed in shifting form, and Natasha’s Spanish is pretty damn good.”
“Very funny.” I kissed the tip of her nose. “I love you, Mila.”
“Good. Now send the picture. Then finish your reading. And then, I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to fuck you again. Or eat that sweet pussy.”
My teeth grabbed at my bottom lip as I tried to hold in a shiver.
It didn’t work. My crotch was hardwired to her every word, and now my underwear was drenched.
I sent the picture and then made a real effort to try to read.
Three pages in, the TV snatched my attention. The Pats scored on an interception. And just as Peyton Manning threw a subtle sidelines hissy fit, Todd texted back.
DAMN! And she’s in Alpha Beta O O O?
“You’re not meeting my brother,” I said.
• 200 •
Better Off red
“Why?” she asked taking my phone from me. I ignored her burst of laughter and turned back to my book. “I’m sorry. Would it be better if I were homely? I can shift form to an ugly girl.”