Beyond Control (19 page)

"Maybe
more
isn't selfish at all. Maybe it's what you deserve."

"Deserve?" After an uncertain moment, she looked away. "I don't like to imagine a world where we all get what we deserve. I think my heart would break to imagine most people deserve what they have gotten."

She had it backwards, had twisted the words into something damning. Lex released a slow breath--a goodbye. She and Avery shared more than blood. Once, they'd shared the same origin and ultimate fate, even the same values.

But exile had changed Lex in ways she couldn't articulate. Here, in some of the poshest surroundings Sector Two had to offer, Avery heard words of hope as condemnation. Back home, in grungy, dirty Sector Four, the same observation would have been met with indignation. Fight.

She missed that fire already.

"I have to go." She clasped her sister's hand for a moment and rose. "Be happy, Avery."

"I will, if you promise the same."

Mad was staring through the glass, agitated and intent. "I promise," Lex whispered.

Avery smiled and let her go.

Mad all but dragged Lex through the house, past the relieved servant and out onto the cobblestone sidewalk. His arm slid around her waist as soon as they were around the corner. "You okay, honey?"

Honest concern demanded an honest answer. "No. Let's get the fuck out of here."

"It's not my secret to share," Gideon said for the third time, leaving Dallas to wonder if punching the grandson of God's supposed prophet was blasphemous enough to endanger his already questionable place in the afterlife. After all the effort it had taken to convince Bren to lag behind while he walked with Gideon,
this
was the only answer the damn man would give when it came to Lex, over and over like some broken pre-Flare toy.

It's not my secret to share.

God damn the bastard, anyway. Him and his meddling and his morals. "Fine, let's talk about some secrets that
are
yours to share. Like what you're hoping to get out of Three."

"Who says I want anything?" The man's wide grin belied the innocence of the deflection.

Dallas didn't hide his snort of amusement. "Yeah. Try that on someone who doesn't know you."

Gideon sobered. "I want my Warriors to have full access to Sector Three."

Christ, the man didn't ask for much, did he? Just motorcycle-riding vigilantes for God rolling through a sector that might as well be hell on earth. "You want them there as helpers or hunters? Because if I'm running Three, my men need to be the law. End of story."

"Hey." Gideon held up both hands. "Feed the hungry and heal the sick. Everything else is your show."

There were benefits to letting Gideon's men in, coldly practical ones. Hungry people were desperate, dangerous, but charity and compassion had a tendency to erode the fearful respect Dallas depended on outside of his gang. He didn't
want
to leave kids hungry and their parents suffering, but he couldn't save them all. And the slightest show of weakness could kick off a territory war that would leave those same children worse than hungry. Innocents were the first to die when bullets started flying.

But if he could keep them safe and let Gideon feed them... "One month trial," Dallas said finally. "But only if they agree to answer to Maddox. I can maybe even find them something in the way of resources, but the lines have to be drawn. You can be the carrot, but I'm still the stick."

"How very manly."

"Hey, some of us aren't coasting on the reputation of a higher power. Us mere mortals gotta do what we can."

Gideon laughed. "If I promise not to make your life harder, will you stop pretending you can't afford to give a shit about people who don't wear your ink?"

That stung, but he supposed it was meant to. "Afford's a funny word. Some prices I'll pay happily. Others...not so much."

"That's the tricky part--figuring out what'll make you shell out. You did it for Edwin Cunningham's daughter." Gideon tilted his head. "Or was that Lex's influence?"

"Maybe you give me too much credit," Dallas countered, unwilling to give voice to the depth of her influence. Not here, with enemies on all sides. Besides, he didn't have to twist the truth much to come out looking bad. "Maybe I'm just cold-blooded enough to recognize all the ways I could use a councilman's daughter."

"Now,
that
I believe."

"And she has great tits."

"Mmm, there you go. Make love, not war, my friend."

So much for offending the delicate sensibilities of a holy man. Gideon's grandfather may have styled himself a modern-day prophet, but his life's work had been preaching against the strict values enforced within Eden. Love was high on the list of things celebrated in Sector One, and it damn sure wasn't all fraternal or platonic.

Dallas clapped Gideon on the shoulder. "I keep telling you, man. Choosing one over the other's boring. You haven't lived until you've made love and war at the same time."

"I guess that's why you--" A noise interrupted the words, and a man whipped around the corner in a flash, knocking Gideon aside. Silver glinted in warning, and Dallas wrenched his body out of the way fast enough for the switchblade to slice across his vest but miss skin.

The rest was muscle memory. He'd instinctively twisted to put his body to the outside of the attacker's arm--and to get a grip on the man's wrist. A hard yank and a heel planted against the side of his knee, and the man staggered with a grunt of pain.

Only staggered. If he'd gone down, maybe Dallas would have checked himself, would have kept the man alive to ask questions. But a clatter behind him indicated Gideon was wrestling with an attacker of his own, and Bren--orders or no, Bren would be here by now if he wasn't fighting his way clear of
something
.

Dallas kicked him again, popping the man's knee with a solid hit from one steel-toed boot, and snapped the bastard's neck on the way down.

Dallas spun to see Gideon punch a second struggling attacker in the lower back--hard. The man hit the wall face-first with a sickening crunch and slumped toward the floor, but Gideon hauled him up with a curse. "Colby's man."

"Fuck." Dallas whirled, took three loping paces toward the last of a dozen corners they'd turned, and almost slammed into Bren. "What happened?"

"Got jumped." Bren panted a little, and a shallow graze of a cut marred his cheek. "Motherfuckers meant business. You good?"

"We're good." He jerked his head in Gideon's direction. "Colby's thugs. Did you recognize any of yours?"

"Same, but they're dead now."

"Goddamn." Dallas shoved a hand through his hair and let himself sigh. "I suppose I knew what I was getting into."

Bren flexed one scarred hand, eying his busted knuckles. "Shivs only come out when the meetings were productive. I take it everything went well."

"Depends on whether or not you were planning a vacation anytime soon." Dallas swept up the knife that had almost slipped between his ribs and stepped over the limp body of the man who'd been holding it. One of the servants would find the fallen men, and it wouldn't be the first time Cerys had cleaned up an assassination attempt in her hallways. "Mad's crazy cousin here decided to make a power play on my behalf. I'm still trying to decide if I'm going to kill him or not."

"You like me too much for that." Gideon tossed Dallas another knife, this one a switchblade. "Besides, I just saved your life."

"My dignity, maybe," he huffed in return, but he still grinned. "Even if I could have taken them both, I don't want to think about what Lex would do to me if I came back to the room with a hole in my hide."

"You, she'd kiss all better," Bren muttered. "I'm the one who'd have to deal with the queen's rage. Which, come to think of it..."

Dallas slugged Bren on the shoulder lightly. Well, kind of lightly. "Don't get too attached to the idea, buddy. Her rage is mine now, too."

"Uh-huh." Bren grimaced at the men on the hallway floor. "Want me to clean up or make sure everything's ready to go?"

"Leave them. I want to get the hell out of this sector."

"Yes, sir."

He brushed past Gideon, who shook his head. "Shouldn't he be sticking around to guard your back against a second wave?"

"Want a lecture on assassination tactics? Chase him down and ask. Don't blame me if you can't sleep tonight, though." Dallas shook his head and clasped Gideon's hand. "It's time for me to haul ass. I've got to head home and break it to the boys that we're expanding operations."

"Take care, O'Kane. Let me know if I can help."

"Oh, you'll be hearing from me. Believe it."

Dallas watched Mad's cousin turn down the corridor to his own quarters before tucking his new switchblade into his pocket. The second knife he kept handy, toying with it as he resumed the walk to his suite.

At least Gideon's motives were clear now. He was probably hoping to lure Dallas into letting the Warriors move into Sector Four, too. More people to feed, more people to save. More to preach to, spreading their message of love above all else.

Maybe Mad and Gideon's grandfather had truly believed it, but the two of them were more practical. Love was powerful, but it didn't put food on the table or a roof over your head. It didn't protect you against all the assholes with hearts too dead to feel anything but hate.

He could deal with Gideon. And Scott was a nonentity, a spoiled child on a throne he'd built to feel special. He'd backed Dallas just to infuriate Colby. Cerys and Jernigan were the mysteries. Their motives were the ones that could come back to haunt not only Dallas, but all of the O'Kanes.

The risks were worth it. They'd always been worth it before.

He wouldn't think about what had changed in the past week. How much more he had to lose if everything fell to pieces.

The folded paper on the silver tray had been waiting for her, silent and damning, and Lex didn't want it.

But no one ignored a summons from Cerys, not on her compound, so she crumpled the paper in her fist and made her way through the serpentine corridors, with Mad dogging every step.

To her credit, Cerys didn't make her wait. She greeted Lex with a smile and waved her inside. Mad caught Lex's gaze, and she
saw
the protest there, the offer to face this battle at her side, no matter what Cerys wanted.

But Christ knew what the woman wanted--or how condemning it might be. "Wait for me here."

He nodded, and Cerys closed the door, trapping Lex in her domain. The room was dark compared to the rest of them, all heavy woods and deep, rich fabrics.

Cerys moved to a table where an open bottle of wine sat between two crystal glasses. "That one has layers, doesn't he? One might almost think he's not very subtle, but I imagine that's the point."

"You imagine?" As if the strategy was foreign to her. "Haven't you been playing the same game for years, Cerys?"

"Most women do." She poured two glasses of blood-red wine and offered one to Lex. "Subtlety isn't generally the provenance of men, my dear. You can pretend to find that distasteful, if you wish, but we both know the truth."

"Or maybe you hang with the wrong men."

Cerys sighed. "So angry, Alexa? Still? I'm not your enemy. At worst, I'm the woman who took you in and did her best to give you the tools you'd need to survive."

"Not out of the goodness of your heart. And you've been repaid." Lex crossed her arms over her chest, suddenly doubting the wisdom of her decision to bar Mad from the room. "What do you
want
?"

"To see you. To admire the woman you've become. If you can credit me with nothing else, surely you can understand the pride I feel at seeing how much you've accomplished." She held out the wine again. "One drink. That's all I ask. Perhaps you'll discover I have something to offer in return."

Appeased, Lex accepted the goblet. The pride thing was bullshit, but a proposition... That made far more sense. "I'm listening."

Cerys circled to take a seat on a low, sleek couch. "You've come far since I last saw you. For the longest time, I thought you weren't going to make a move at all." Cerys's gaze dropped to the collar circling Lex's throat. "Having Dallas O'Kane in hand makes you a powerful woman. More powerful than you realize, since he's just doubled his territory."

Sector Three. The news only compounded Lex's already surreal disbelief. "You think I'm playing him."

Cerys froze with her glass almost to her lips. "Playing is a crude description of what we do, but yes, Lex. I assumed you were seeing to your own interests as well as his dick."

And of course, those two things had to be intimately connected. "Good thing you're sitting down, because this might shock you, but any attention I lavish on Dallas's dick is for its own sake. I take care of my interests in other ways."

"So defensive. So
vehement
." Cerys sipped her wine, and from the amusement in her gaze, Lex could tell she didn't believe. Not yet. "You don't need to be ashamed of who you are. You're exactly what I need. A woman strong enough to carry on the work I've started."