Authors: Claire Adams
CHAPTER
TWENTY-SIX
"
Wait
, what?" I said into the
phone. "This can't be happening!"
"I'm sorry,
Leah," Patrick said. "You didn't pay the insurance policy, so the
only way we're going to be able to deal with the house is to sell it."
"No, Patrick!
We can't sell the house!" I protested. The investigators had been out to
assess the damage, and they determined that a lit cigarette had fallen out of
the ashtray and burned through the rug beneath the sofa, causing the fire. We'd
been lucky that Mama had gone up to her room and lay down on the bed instead of
falling asleep on the couch like she usually did during the day. But the
damages were more than what we could afford to fix, and the house had been
rendered uninhabitable by the fire.
"Leah,
there's no other way," Patrick sighed. "I'm sorry. There's no money
to repair the place, and Mama needs care. If we sell the house, we can afford
to put her in a long term care facility and get you and Riley an
apartment."
"Why are you
doing this?" I asked.
"Let's get
something straight, Leah," he said sternly. "I'm not doing anything.
You didn't pay the insurance policy. That's all on you. I'm doing the best I
can with what I have, and it's not much. So stop talking to me like I'm the
enemy."
"Don't
lecture me, Patrick!" I shot back. "I'm the one who stayed.
Dammit!"
"So, we're
back to this again, are we?" he said. "Look, I'm not going to have
this conversation with you, Leah. I did what I had to do. I'm sorry you resent
me for it, but after Molly disappeared, I had to get out."
"I know. I
know. You took care of yourself and left me to hold it all together," I
said bitterly. "Well, good for you, Patrick. I'm glad you've been saved,
or whatever it is that you've done. The rest of us still live in this world,
and we need a place to stay! I want to fix the house and move back in."
"Tell me
exactly how you think you're going to do that, Leah," Patrick prompted.
"How are you going to pay for the repairs and take care of Mama? She needs
help, Leah. She's an alcoholic, and she's become a danger to herself and those
around her. What if Riley had been home? Have you thought about that,
Leah?"
"Of course, I
have!" I shouted into the phone. "If Riley had been home, she would
have stopped the fire."
"Do you hear
yourself, Leah?" Patrick asked gently. "You're expecting a
twelve-year-old to take care of her alcoholic grandmother. It's not reasonable.
Or healthy."
"What else do
you want me to do?" I asked as the tears began to flow down my cheeks.
"I'm doing the best I can, Patrick. I'm trying to hold it all together. I
can't do this anymore. For God's sake, I'm twenty-eight-years-old, and I'm
parenting a twelve-year-old, motherless child while I care for our mother and
work a full-time job! I never asked for any of this! When do I get to have a
life, Patrick? When does my life not involve cleaning up everyone else's
mess?"
"Sell the
house, Leah," Patrick said without further comment.
"Screw you,
Patrick," I said before disconnecting. I put my head in my hands and
sobbed silently as I absorbed the fact that I was truly alone in the world. If
we didn't have a house to return to, where were we going to go? I cried until I
felt there were no more tears. I wiped my eyes, took a deep breath, and looked
up to see Riley standing silently in the doorway watching me with wide eyes.
"Riley, I
wanted …" I began. She shook her head sadly before turning and running
down the hall away from me.
"Riley!"
I shouted as I shot out from behind my desk to follow her. "Riley, come
back, and let's talk about this!"
But she was gone.
CHAPTER
TWENTY-SEVEN
"
Mr
. Yates, you've got a
visitor," Norma said through the intercom. "Would you like me to send
her in?"
"What the
hell?" I muttered as I picked up the phone and dialed Norma's extension.
"I don't remember scheduling a meeting this morning, Norma. What is this
about? And since when did you start calling me Mr. Yates?"
"I believe
this is a last-minute addition to your schedule, darlin'," Norma drawled
more heavily than necessary to underscore her irritation with me. "You
want me to send her in to chat with you?"
"Fine, send
her in," I said in an exasperated tone as I threw up my hands and waited
for my new priority to walk through the door. A few seconds later, the door
opened, and Riley walked through. She looked at me from under her lashes and
then turned and looked back at Norma who was standing guard, holding the door.
Norma shot me a look that told me I'd be dead if I screwed this up, and only
when I nodded that the message had been clearly received did she shut the door
quietly.
"Riley, hey,
c'mon in and have a seat," I said motioning to the chairs across from my
desk. "Can I get you something to drink?"
"Do you have
any soda?" she asked hopefully.
"I think I've
got water and maybe some spoiled cream in this little fridge over here, but if
you really want a soda, I can ask Norma to go get a couple for us," I
offered.
"Nah, it's
okay," she said as she dropped down into the chair closest to my desk and
looked around. "This office is big, but it's really ugly."
"Yeah, it
used to be my Pop's, and he didn't have very good taste, apparently," I
said, shrugging. I watched her closely, trying to figure out how to proceed.
"I've been trying to figure out what to do with it, but I didn't have any
good ideas. What do you think?"
"Are you
really asking me what I think, or are you doing that grown-up thing where you
ask me just to have something to talk about?" she asked bluntly.
"No,
actually, I really want to know your opinion," I said as I stood up and
walked around the desk. I sat down across from her in the other chair and
rested my elbows on my knees as I spoke. "I always have good ideas when it
comes to stuff for other people, but when I have to decide for me, I never
quite know what's right, you know?"
"Seems like a
personal problem to me," she said picking at the hem of her shirt. I could
tell she had something she wanted to say and that she was weighing the
consequences of saying it by testing me.
"It probably
is," I agreed. I decided that the path of least aggression was the best
one to traverse with this child. So I waited.
It was an
uncomfortable silence punctuated by Riley's fidgeting. I stayed as still as a
statue and silently thanked my brother for teaching me the game despite the
fact that I'd hated him intensely when he'd enforced the rules and then called
me out when I broke them.
As I waited, my
mind wandered. I wondered what was happening with Leah and why she wouldn't
talk to me about it. Then my brain moved on to Sloan as I wondered what she had
up her sleeve and tried to decide if my choice to cut off the sexual part of
our relationship was a smart thing or if she'd...
"Do you miss
your dad?" Riley asked cutting into my thoughts.
"That's an
interesting question," I said as I rubbed a hand across my eyes and sat
back in my chair. "Why do you ask?"
"I'm just
curious," she shrugged before adding, "I don't know anyone who’s lost
their parent, except you."
"Yeah, I
guess you and I are kind of in that same boat, aren't we?" I nodded,
wondering how I was supposed to handle this. I knew nothing about what had
happened to her mother, and I didn't want to say the wrong thing and open up a
can of worms.
"Do you miss
him?" she repeated as she stared at me, waiting.
"Well, that's
a difficult question to answer," I said as I thought about how to respond.
"You don't,
do you?" she said. It wasn't an accusation, just an acknowledgement of the
facts.
"No,
actually, I don't," I admitted for the first time.
"Was he mean
to you? Is that why you don't miss him?" she asked before looking away.
"Let's just
say that my father was a difficult man," I said, carefully sidestepping
the things I'd prefer not to discuss with a twelve-year-old.
"My mom was
difficult, too," she said looking at me straight in the eye. "I love
her, but she was very difficult. Sometimes it was hard to love her."
"Yeah, I know
the feeling," I nodded, thinking that as long as Riley was leading the
discussion, I was okay admitting things that matched her observations.
"Sometimes I
miss her, but most of the time I'm really glad that Leah is in charge of me—
and not my mom," she said. "I know that's a bad thing to say because
you're supposed to love your parents, but my mom wasn't as good at taking care
of me as Leah is."
"Yeah, that's
a hard one," I nodded. "My Pop wasn't around a lot, but when he was,
he could be really tough. So, mostly I'm glad that it was my mother who raised
us."
"Is your mom
nice?" she asked.
"She
is," I said with a smile.
"That's
good," Riley murmured as she went back to playing with the hem of her
shirt. I could tell she was thinking hard about something, but again, I didn't
want to interfere with her thoughts or prompt her to say something she wasn't
ready to say. I had no idea how to talk to kids, so I stayed silent and slipped
back into my own thoughts, waiting for Riley to tell me what was on her mind.
I wondered if it
had something to do with what was going on with Leah. I opened my mouth to ask,
but then closed it before the words came out. It was none of my business, and
if Leah wanted me to know what was going on with her, she'd tell me herself.
"We don't
have a place to live anymore," Riley blurted out. "Gram burned us out
of our house yesterday because she was smoking, and when she drinks she forgets
about her lit cigarettes."
"Wait,
what?" I said stunned that she was telling me this, but more stunned that
I had no idea that this had happened.
"We stayed
with my uncle Patrick last night, but he lives in the church, so there's no
room for us. Besides, Leah and Patrick don't get along," she confessed.
The more she talked, the easier it seemed to flow, so I stayed silent and let
her tell me as much as she wanted to. I would ask questions once she'd gotten
the whole story out.
"Leah says
that we can stay in a hotel for a couple of nights, but I think she forgot to
pay the insurance policy," Riley continued. "I heard her arguing with
Uncle Patrick about selling the house, and she was crying because we don't have
any place to live. She thinks it's her fault, but it isn't. It's Gram's fault
for smoking and drinking."
I listened as the
whole story came tumbling out of Riley's mouth. The grandmother who was an
alcoholic, the uncle who was a priest, the missing mother, and all of it seemed
to fall on Leah's shoulders. Riley talked about getting suspended, and as she
did, she began to cry.
"Oh, now wait
a minute," I said as I slid out of my chair and kneeled on the floor in
front of her. I took her hand and said, "Why did you get in a fight with
that girl in the first place?"
"She said
mean things about my mom," Riley sniffed as she wiped the back of her free
hand across her eyes. "She called my mom a whore and a junkie. I was sick
of it."
"Sounds like
just cause to me," I said. "Listen, when I was a kid, I was always
getting in fights and getting suspended from school. My mother would scold me
and tell me I had to do better— try and get along with people, but nobody ever
asked me why I was fighting in the first place."
"Why did you
fight?" she asked as she sniffed back a small sob.
"I didn't
like it when the bullies picked on the little kids who couldn't fight
back," I said quietly. "I knew what that felt like."
"So you
fought the big kids so they wouldn't beat up the little ones?" she asked
hopefully.
"Yeah, but I
didn't do a very good job of it," I admitted. "I wasn't much of a
fighter."
"Doesn't
matter," she said squeezing my hand. "You didn't let them just pick
on those kids. I bet those kids were really glad someone stood up for
them."
"I don't
know," I shrugged, trying not to remember the moments of sheer terror I
felt as I trudged home from school carrying yet another suspension notice in my
backpack and knowing that at some point that evening I'd have to face my
father.
"I do,"
she said patting my shoulder. "Because a couple of times there have been
bigger kids who've stood up and defended me, and it felt good to know that I
had someone looking out for me."
"Thanks,"
I said, giving her a grateful smile before redirecting the conversation.
"But what are you guys going to do?"
"Me and Leah?
Aw, we'll be okay," she said waving a hand at me as if none of this was a
big deal. "We always find a way to get by."
"Is that
so?" I said with an amused grin. There was something about her casual
confidence that made her incredibly endearing.
Just then, Norma
knocked on the door and said that I had an urgent call from one of the
suppliers. Riley nodded at me and got up to go with Norma. As she reached the
door, she turned around and said, "Thanks for the talk, Jack. I feel
better. I hope you do, too."
Before I could
answer, she turned and quietly closed the door behind her. I walked over to the
desk, determined to end the call as quickly as possible because I had an idea
about how to solve a number of problems.
The question was
whether Leah would accept my solutions.