Black Knight 02 - Back in Black (10 page)

"You mean fantastical creatures of the imagination, like trolls, vampires and fairies?"
 

"Yes, Your Majesty, just like that." Greg looked about like I felt, which was kinda like I'd been kicked in the guts by a horse. Or a troll.
 

"Well, then I assure you, Mr. Knightwood, that this dragon is every bit as mythical as you are. But do not despair, my friends, I would not dream of sending you into battle with such a creature garbed in such inadequate clothing." With that, she clapped her hands and Greg and I were suddenly wearing suits of silver chain mail, complete with breastplates, arm guards and plates over our shins and thighs. Helmets appeared floating in midair in front of us, open-faced things with silver wings sweeping out from the sides. I grabbed mine and put it on, and looked over at Greg.

"I don't want to think about how much metal went into wrapping your gut, bro." I quipped, and then turned to look at Sabrina and my mouth dropped open. She looked like an over-sexed Valkyrie, with her own winged helmet, chain mail and breast plate, but where Greg and I had on chain mail leggings, she had an armored skirt that was slit up way higher than I thought was exactly practical. Her breastplate had some obvious concessions to anatomy, with a couple of vents in interesting places showing a little more flesh than I would have expected. All in all, I was pretty distracted by the image, and I figured any enemy might be as well. I was less sure about what effect her appearance would have on a huge lizard, but at least I'd have some eye candy while I was being chomped to death.
 

"Um, Your Majesty?" Greg actually raised his hand. I'm gonna have to teach him to sack up one of these days, but I decided that being on our best behavior here probably wasn't a bad idea.
 

"Yes, vampire?" That still bugs me. It's like people think it's a title or something. We have names, after all. We don't go around calling people "human."
 

"This armor is great and all, but we're going to need some weapons, too. Don't you think?" That's when I noticed that my daggers hadn't made the transition with my clothes. Just as well, I doubt a six-inch blade would do much against a dragon anyway.
 

"Of course, Gregory. Follow me, I will take you to my armory." With that, she turned and headed through a door in the side of the room that I was pretty sure hadn't existed before that second. It just reminded me yet again how much I hate magic.
 

We followed Milandra down a long marbled hallway until she stopped in front of a thick wooden door flanked by two knights holding huge polearms. She gestured to the door, and it opened. With a wave of one regal hand, Milandra said "You may arm yourselves with anything you find within. Choose carefully, your lives may depend on the decisions you make here."
 

I went in first, and my heart sank a little as I looked around. Racks and racks of swords, shields and armor filled the huge room, with dozens of bows, crossbows and spears leaning against a far wall. I looked around the whole room a couple of times, then looked back at Greg and said, "Hey Frodo, you see anything in a 9mm around here?"
 

Greg stopped waving a battle-axe around and said, "Of course not, dude. We're in the realm of the Fae, a world of magic. There's not going to be a gun shop anywhere to be found."
 

"Too bad for you, chica," I said, passing a crossbow over to Sabrina. She sighted down the length of the crossbow and set it aside, walking to the wall of bows instead.
 

She picked up a short recurved bow and drew it experimentally. "This works for me. Reminds me of summer camp." She picked up a quiver of nasty-looking barbed arrows and said "I should probably stay out of range as much as possible, not being gifted with super-strength, speed or healing."
 

"Good idea."
 
I replied, hefting a huge claymore with one hand. It was a little long, but having vampire strength definitely made me able to swing the six-foot sword one-handed, even if I couldn't exactly bring it back around quickly. After a couple of practice swings I put the oversized toothpick away and picked up a shorter, thinner sword that looked like it was designed for one- or two-handed use. "This seems to suit me just fine." I dropped a wicked-looking spiked mace in a hip sheath and slid the sword over one shoulder.
 

Greg strapped on a pair of broadswords, and we were about to head back out into the hallway when something caught the corner of my eye. "Hey, Sabrina, try this on." I said as I handed her a battered, plain leather sheath with a thin curved sword in it.
 

Sabrina belted on the scabbard and drew the sword, slashing the air experimentally a couple of times. The blade had a slight reddish sheen to it, and the hilt fit her hand like it was made for her. "This is perfect, Jimmy. Thanks. I hope I don't get close enough to that beast to need it, but if I do, this will be just the thing." I blushed a little, which is no small feat on borrowed blood, and ducked out into the hall, almost bowling over Milandra, who stood there waiting for me. Greg and Sabrina chuckled a little and went back to arming themselves, picking out a few daggers and things to round out their arsenal.
 

"Speak to me, vampire." She said, leading me a few steps down the hall. I followed, of course, because what else do you do when the Fairy Queen says to do something?

"What can I do for you, Your Majesty?" I asked when we were out of earshot of the others.
 

"Who is she?" Milandra asked, her lavender eyes doing nothing to hide her nervousness.
 

"She's your cousin." I said simply.
 

"I thought we were kin." The queen looked as though I had just confirmed an unpleasant medical diagnosis.
 

"But you were younger than her when you were taken. And now you're...the queen." I corrected in mid-stream, remembering at the last second not to make stupid comments about a woman's age. Especially if that woman has magic and is the ultimate ruler of the dimension you happen to be standing in.
 

"Time moves differently here than in your world. You will be here for days, perhaps weeks, and will return to your world only moments after you departed. I have been ruler here for some years, but in your world I would barely be considered an adult. Does she know our relationship?" This time I thought I saw real fear in her eyes.

"No. At least, I don't think so. I noticed it right away, but I don't think she has any idea."

"You would see it before anyone, wouldn't you?"
 

"I don't think I get what you mean, Your Majesty."

"Never mind, James. It doesn't matter in any regard. Now, you have a quest to complete, and I have a meeting with the Unseelie to arrange. If you return." She started to turn back toward the others, and I reached out and grabbed her arm.
 

"Wait a minute, Your Majesty. You're still sending us...her...on this ridiculous dragon hunt even though you know she's your blood relative?" She looked down at my hand and back up at my face with a raised eyebrow.
 

I didn't let go of her arm, and she answered, "I have made my decree. You require a boon of me; I require a boon of you. Trust me James, you do not wish to be indebted to the Queen of the Fae. Those debts are tied to the office, not the holder, and the next ruler of this land may not be as...friendly to your kind as I." With that, she looked back down at my hand and I let her go.
 

I followed Milandra back to where the others were waiting for us. When we had rejoined the group, she said "I can use my magic to transport you to the forest where the dragon makes his lair. When you have the creature’s heart firmly in your grasp, smash this globe on the ground and stand close together. The globe will return you to my great hall. I wish you luck." She gave me a long, steady look that probably held a lot more subtext than I caught, but I just took it to mean bring my cousin back alive, and I nodded to her. Then, with a wave of her hands and a flash of pink and purple fairy dust (yes, really), we were off to slay a dragon.
 

Chapter 16

Apparently FairyLand dragons live just like you'd expect them to - in caves deep in dark forests. Because that's exactly where Milandra dropped us, right outside a cave in what looked and felt like a deep forest. The ground was carpeted with thick undergrowth, there was moss hanging from the branches, and the mouth of a cave gaped hungrily in front of us. I stood there for a few seconds getting my bearings (or my courage), then took a deep breath and marched resolutely forward.
 

Only to trip over Sabrina's outstretched leg and fall flat on my face into a plant that I really hoped wasn't poison ivy. I have no idea if I can still get poison ivy since I'm dead, but I wasn't really interested in finding out. I scrambled back to my feet and whirled to face the smirking cop. "What the hell was that about?" I demanded.
 

"Do you have a plan, Brainiac?" She asked.
 

"Yeah. Go in the cave. Kill dragon. Carve out dragon's heart. Go back to the palace. Eat another fairy chick. Make trolls agree to stop beating up gay men in my city. Go home. Drink beer. Did I leave out anything important?"

"Maybe how we're going to accomplish the whole 'kill dragon' step." She said, walking around and testing low-hanging branches. "Look at the mouth of that cave. Can anything as big as Milandra described get through that opening?"
 

I had to admit that it looked pretty small for anything dragon-sized. The cave opening was about ten feet tall and maybe a little wider than that. Certainly not as big as I would expect for a dragon's lair. "Okay, you've got a point. So what's your plan, General Patton?"
 

"We explore the whole area very carefully, make sure there isn't another entrance or escape route for the dragon, and then plan our assault." I hate it when she's right. I hate it even more because she's
always
right.
 

"Okay," I said. "That does make a lot of sense. Why don't I go this way, you and Greg go that way, and we'll meet back here in about thirty minutes to make a plan."
 

"Sounds good to me, but why are you going off alone?" She asked.
 

"It's not that I'm going off alone, but to be brutally honest, I'm not the most graceful thing in the forest, and neither is Greg. If he and I split up, then anything that hears us will wonder why there are two rampaging elephants rummaging in the forest outside a dragon's lair. Hopefully the noise will be so distracting that any beasties just decide to leave us alone instead of attacking."
 

"Hey!" Greg protested. "I'm stealthy. Like a ninja." He leaned on the trunk of a tree, which proved to be rotten and toppled over, taking my fat vampire ninja to the ground in a crash.
 

"Yeah, you and Kung Fu Panda, bro." I turned and headed off into the forest as quietly as possible, which really isn't that quiet. I'm a city vampire, despite my years at Clemson. I don't spend a whole lot of time in the great outdoors, mostly because there's never anybody to eat out there. The wilderness is wild, man. I'll stick to someplace with delivery.
 

I wandered around for about ten minutes until I came to what looked like the front of the cave. Now
that
looked like something a dragon could get into - an opening easily fifty feet wide and thirty feet high. The ground in front of the cave mouth was packed hard and smooth, like something really, really big and heavy used this entrance often. I looked up and saw Greg and Sabrina coming around the other side of the hill. "I guess this is probably the front porch." I said as they came into view.
 

"Yep." Sabrina said. "Now what do you think about a frontal assault, Braveheart?"
 

"Might not be my best idea ever." I admitted. "What does your plan smell like, Sun Tzu?"
 

"Actually, it's Greg's plan." She said, waving at my out of breath partner.
 

"Then we're doomed. I'm pretty sure we don't have the cheat codes for this boss fight, gamer-boy." I said as Greg sat down heavily on a boulder.

"Maybe not, but I've still got a pretty good idea for how to make a dragon trap." He panted.
 

"I'm all ears, bro." I said.
 

"No, Jimmy, you're usually all mouth. But I'll take it." He pulled a dagger from his belt and started to sketch out a diagram in the dirt. "You and I get up to the top of the cave mouth with our swords. Sabrina goes back around to the back door and sneaks in with her bow. She shoots the dragon in the butt with a few of those nasty arrows, and when it comes running out the front door, we jump on its head and kill it. If we each go for an eye, we should be able to stab straight into the brain and drop the beast without any fuss or bloodshed."
 

"At least on our part." Sabrina said.
 

"Yeah, shedding a whole lot of dragon blood is sorta the plan." Greg agreed.