Black & Ugly (29 page)

"All wrong? What you talking about, Jay? Have you or have you not been sneaking behind my back seeing Parade for the past few months?"

"Yes," he says but his answer catches me off guard, and I hold on to the rail for support.

"Yes?" I ask him, trying to give him a chance to explain. "What do you mean
yes,
Jay? You don't even feel bad about this?"

"No, I don't. I'm tired of you not trustin' me, Sky.

And I'm tired of you throwin' niggas in my face. You think just 'cuz I like light-skinned chicks that you can
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treat me like I'm a pussy-ass nigga. Yeah, I fucks with the red broads but you ain't the only light-skin chick in the world, Sky. You just the one I chose." I'm crying so hard that I can barely see him."You bitch. You fucking bitch. I can't believe I wasted all my time on you!" I scream as I repeatedly beat his chest with my fists. "How could you do this to me?"

"I could do this to you 'cuz I love you."

"What?" I say. "'Cuz you love me? Jay, what in the fuck are you talking about?"

"I'm sayin' I've been keepin' time with Parade, but it's not for the reasons you think it is. It's 'cuz you told me she was your friend even though I ain't want you fuckin' wit' her, and I needed somebody to help me pick out the right ring for the woman I want to marry.

I figured only your best friend could really know what you want. And she was gonna help me with the proposal."

"What?" I question, instantly feeling happiness in place of sadness. "What did you say?"

"I said that Parade has been helpin' me plan how I was gonna propose to you."

"Oh, Jay," I whisper as I jump up and hug him.

"Baby, I'm so sorry. Please forgive me." I kiss him all over his face. "I didn't mess things up, did I? Do you realize how happy this makes me? I knew you couldn't be attracted to Parade over me. I knew it but I needed to hear it from you."

"Come on, man. Why would I fuck with Parade?

You know how I feel about dark chicks."
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"I know, baby, but she was acting weird and I smelled the perfume I gave her on your clothes ... and I'm so sorry," I explain, talking in circles. "This explains everything."

I'm relieved. I'm so fucking relieved that Jay ain't ready to leave me to be with Parade.

"Now how you feel?" he asks as he smiles at me and pulls me to him. "You actin' all jealous and shit and now you fucked up everything. I'da never thought you would think Parade is any competition for you. Damn, ma."

I'm embarrassed. I made a fool out of myself, and he'll always think that I thought Parade was in my league. I have to think of something. I can't live with him thinking that. I don't care how she looks now, she will never have nothin' on me.

"Boy, neva did I think she's any competition. You must've lost your mind." I laugh. "It's just that Parade ain't the person you think she is and lately my mind has been messed up. That's all."

"What you mean?" he asks.

"I mean, Parade did something to somebody real fucked up and ever since it happened, it's messed my head up about her. She's not the person I thought she was."

"What you talkin bout, shawty? If you gonna tell me, tell me the whole story."

"I can't go into detail right now. Let's just say she has a lot to do with what happened at the party the night that girl was killed and leave it at that."
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He backs up, looks at me then laughs. It pisses me off that he doesn't believe me.

"Yeah, a'ight. Whateva you say. If you feel like she's competition, you feel like she's competition. It's okay.

I'm a handsome dude and you got a little jealous, that's all," he adds as he playfully punches my face. "But if you care anything about shawty, you really shouldn't go around making shit like that up. Parade can get fucked up because that bitch was a major balla's wife."

"I ain't makin' shit up. So what, you don't believe me?" I ask while feeling more embarrassed that I told him anything.

"No, I don't."

"Well, why should I believe anything you just told me then? I mean, you just told me you came out of the apartment because she was helping you propose to me, right? So why don't I ask her just to make sure, since we're not believing each other around here," I say as I take one step closer to Daffany's door.

The sly smile he had on his face a few seconds ago is wiped off. Yeah, mothafucka, I got you.

"Why you actin' stupid? Let's go," he says as he pulls my arm.

"No," I say as I snatch it back. "I ain't goin'

nowhere. I'm gonna ask her right fuckin' now if what you telling me is true."

"You know what, if you gonna act like that, it's ova," he responds as he walks out the building door.

I know exactly what he's doing. He wants me to be all scared to break-up and come running behind him
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and shit, but I want him to be as embarrassed and fucked up as he just made me feel. And I want to make sure what he's saying is true.

The moment I knock on the door, Jay comes back in and runs up behind me.

"Don't do this shit, Sky. Why you fuckin' wit' that girl?" he yells.

I don't say anything, just knock. Parade finally opens and I hate how cute she looks. Her hair is still new and she has on a cute Baby Phat one-piece cat suit. Even her makeup looks nice, but I can tell it isn't MAC.

It seems like the more days that go by, the better she appears. Any other time when we didn't talk for a while she'd fall off, but lately that ain't the case. That makes me hate her even more.

"Hey, Sky," she says, excited to see me. "What you doin' here?"

"I need to know something right now."

"You wanna come in? I'm just cleaning Daffany's apartment since she's still having trouble moving around. Me and Miss Wayne ordered her a new living room set and it'll be coming later."

"Well that's good for Daffany," I reply, unenthused about what they're doing for her.

The three of them do more stuff for one another than they do for me, but it's to be expected because they have always been jealous of me. I bet Parade paid the same thing for that cat suit that she paid for the purse Miss Wayne gave her. Nothing.

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"So, what's up?" she asks as the smile is removed from her face. "What you got to talk to me about?" She looks at Jay and back at me.

"What was Jay doing over here just now?"

"I told you -" Jay interrupts.

"Shut the fuck up, Jay. I'm talking to Parade," I snap as I throw my hand up so the back of it is in his face.

"Man, fuck this shit!" he yells and walks out the building. "I'm outta here."

Everything he just did proves his guilt even more.

"I don't think I should tell you, Sky."

"Why not, bitch? Why don't you think you should fucking tell me?"

She instantly looks like she is on the verge of crying.

She never could take it when I call her out her name and I smile inside because I know I can still control her feelings no matter what. Maybe now that smile can be wiped off her face with the cheap makeup she's wearing.

"I can't tell you," she states in a low voice while looking down, "'cuz it'll ruin Jay's marriage proposal to you." She gently closes the door.

As I stand in the hallway facing Daffany's door, an immediate feeling of embarrassment and loss takes over me. I'm sure that after today I have lost Jay for good. All I want to do is run and hide but I know that the moment I get in the car, Jewel will be waiting to hear the details.

Damn.

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26

Markee

"MARKEE, YOU GONNA HAVE TO chill the fuck out, man.

You don't have to shoot every mothafucka you have a
run-in wit'. You being trigger happy is fuckin' makin'