Blessings (19 page)

Instead of crouching behind a tombstone, they chose a bench beneath a towering elm at the corner of the cemetery. The concrete bench felt cool despite the warmth of the night air, and Trina released a satisfied sigh.

“It’s nice to be alone with you this way.”

Graham nodded, keeping his face attentively turned to her.

“And right now I can’t imagine waiting five years to get married.”

Graham ducked his head for a moment, his eyes closed. When he raised his gaze to meet hers again, she glimpsed a maturity and strength beyond what she’d seen before. She swallowed, waiting quietly for him to share his thoughts.

“Trina, my desire would be to marry you this winter. My home is ready; my heart is ready to make you my wife. But I don’t want to be selfish.”

“Selfish?”

He nodded. “Think how much time you took studying to pass the GED. Don’t you think college will be even harder than that? I want you to have the time you need to do your best. If you’re working for Dr. Groening
and
running a household, you aren’t going to have time to focus on studies. Maybe. . .” Suddenly the conviction in his tone faltered. He cleared his throat and started again. “Maybe it would be best for us to wait so you can give this dream the time and attention it deserves to be fully born.”

Trina stared at him in amazement. “You really want to wait?”

He chuckled softly, placing his hand over hers in the center of the bench. “No, my precious Trina, I don’t
want
to wait. But I wonder if it’s best to wait.” He drew in a deep breath and released it, his gaze heavenward where a few stars glittered softly against the fading evening sky. “I read a verse in Proverbs about the Lord giving us rich blessings without adding any sorrow to it. It seems to me that stressing over finding time to study and not being able to apply yourself fully to this task is going to lead to sorrow for you. That isn’t right.”

“Oh, Graham. . .” Trina knew what it cost him to make this concession. His readiness for a home and family hadn’t been kept secret, yet he was willing to set aside his desires for the sake of hers. If she’d harbored any question about whether he truly loved her, the unease now whisked away like a cottonwood seed on a stiff Kansas breeze.

“We could still be published but just put off the wedding until you have college finished. I would like to take you to Lehigh to work each day so we’d have some time together. I’m not saying it will be easy.” His voice dropped to a low growl. “But I do think it will be for the best.”

Trina nodded slowly, absorbing the wisdom of his words. Looking back on the number of hours she had spent in preparation for the GED, she knew taking college classes would tax her time and energy. But five years. . .

She groaned. “How did Uncle Henry live for twenty years without Aunt Marie?”

Graham laughed—a low, throaty sound. “I’ve wondered that myself. I guess when I get to feeling impatient, I can always go talk to him. He should be able to give good advice.”

Suddenly something occurred to Trina. “If we wait until I’m finished, then. . .when it comes time for me to take classes on a campus instead of over the Internet, I’ll be moving away from Sommerfeld all alone.” Uncertainty washed over her. Could she manage by herself in a strange town, hours away from her family and Graham?

His warm fingers tightened on her hand. “That isn’t something you need to worry about yet. It’s at least two years away, since you’ll be taking your first classes online. By the time you need to go away, God will give you the strength you need.” Another chuckle sounded, this one rueful in tone. “And He’ll give me the strength to let you go.”

“Or maybe. . .” Trina licked her lips, peering at him hopefully. “I won’t have to go alone?”

He smiled, shaking his head. “As I said, we’ll worry about it when the time comes. But until then, you need to learn what you can from Dr. Groening, you need to study hard, and you need to prove to everyone in Sommerfeld that becoming a veterinarian will not be damaging to your faith.”

Trina threw her hands outward, releasing a snort of laughter. “Oh, that’s nothing! Anyone could do it!” Then she sobered, taking Graham’s hand again. Amazing how the feel of his strong fingers gave her courage. “I’m sorry I’m making you wait, but thank you for being willing to wait for me.”

“Oh, my Trina. . .” Graham sighed, raising his free hand to cup her cheek. “I’ve told you before: You are worth the wait. God will get us through this time of waiting, and when we are finally together as husband and wife, I’ll feel like the richest man in the world.”

N
INETEEN

T
rina closed her Bible and slipped to her knees beside her bed. She’d made a commitment to God not to give studying more importance than fellowship with Him, so her early mornings were committed to Bible reading and prayer.

While her books waited on the table she’d set up in the corner of her bedroom, she spent long minutes talking to God, offering praises for His work in her life, acknowledging her weaknesses, and petitioning Him for assistance and strength. She was careful to ask for His help for others before ending with her daily request: “And help me do well in my classes so I can honor You.”

Rising, she crossed to the table and smoothed her hand across the cover of the top book. Despite the fact that she’d been following a study routine for two weeks now, there were still moments when it all seemed like a dream. She really didn’t own college textbooks; she really wasn’t a college student. But the stack of books beneath her hand was solid; the pages contained words and pictures and graphs. Not a dream but a certainty.

Suddenly, as had happened frequently in the two weeks she’d studied on her own and submitted assignments through Beth’s computer, a feeling of impatience struck. Her first two years of study would be basic subjects—nothing directly related to animal care—and she longed to dive into the classes that would benefit her the most. Yet the college adviser had said every student was required to pass the basic subjects first.

Closing her eyes, she whispered, “Make these first two years go quickly, please.” The addendum to her formal prayer time brought a smile to her face. During her weeks of preparing for the GED, she’d nearly put aside conversation with her heavenly Father. But now it came naturally again, making her even more certain she was doing exactly what He’d called her to do.

She slid onto the wooden chair Dad had grudgingly hauled in from the car’s shed and opened the English composition book. Since she would be returning to work at Dr. Groening’s clinic on Monday, this would be her last full day of study—she intended to make the most of it. But despite her best efforts to keep her attention on past and present verb tenses, her mind kept drifting a few miles east to Lehigh and the clinic.

With a sigh, she allowed herself to replay the telephone conversation with the aging doctor.

“Trina! Of course, I’d be delighted to hire you again. My receptionist has been filling in for you since I haven’t been able to find anyone else. She’ll be very willing to let you have those duties again.”

Trina had smiled then stated adamantly, “But I won’t be doing only cleanup forever, you know. I’m now enrolled in college. I will be a veterinarian one day.”

“The fellowship approved it?”

The shock in the man’s tone hadn’t surprised Trina. It gave her great pleasure to repeat his words as a statement. “The fellowship approved it.”

“Well, congratulations, Trina.”

“And, Dr. Groening, I’d appreciate it if you would consider selling me your practice when the time comes.”

At that point there had been a lengthy pause, during which Trina feared the connection might have been terminated. But finally his voice had returned, hesitant in its delivery. “You know, Trina, I’m already past the age of retirement. I’ve continued because I’m the only veterinarian nearby for many of the area farmers. But another five years of practice? I’m not sure I want to continue that long.”

Trina’s heart pounded with trepidation. She couldn’t possibly complete the necessary coursework and practicum in fewer than five years. Given the expenses involved, she feared the time might be extended while she worked to save up enough money to finish. “Will you at least consider it?” she had managed to squeak.

Finally Dr. Groening’s tired voice had said, “I’ll consider it. We can talk more when you come into work, all right?”

That promised conversation was just around the corner, and Trina was both eager and reluctant to finalize her plans with the doctor. Sighing, she rested her chin in her hand and stared out the open window. Although September had arrived, bringing a change in color to the trees, the daytime weather still held the feel of summer. Evenings were somewhat less stuffy, however, and she and Graham spent at least an hour together on the porch before sundown each day.

Closing her eyes, she deliberately conjured Graham’s face—his handsome, honed, adoring face. He had a way of looking at her that made her feel treasured and special. Just thinking of him now increased her pulse while a flutter of something pleasant coiled in her chest. A smile played on the corners of her lips. Her intended husband. . .

How fortunate she was to have a man willing to listen to God’s voice rather than remaining trapped in the traditions of man. Based on the reaction of many of the community members, she felt certain no other young man in Sommerfeld would have supported her desire to further her education. God had certainly chosen the perfect mate for her. Each evening, as he bestowed a chaste kiss on her forehead, Graham whispered, “Do a little reading before you turn in. Keep your grades up.”

With the remembered gentle admonition, Trina gave a start. How long had she been sitting here daydreaming? She had work to do! Determinedly, she turned her attention back to the English book. When she met Graham for lunch at the café, she wanted to give him a good report on her morning’s progress.

“So I got three English assignments done—one that isn’t even due for another week—and a science paper written. I’ll need to type it, and then I can send it. Beth taught me how to e-mail attachments. It sure makes things simple.” Trina pushed her empty plate aside and rested her elbows on the table edge. Despite the busyness of the café’s noon traffic, she and Graham were secluded in a corner booth, giving them a small amount of privacy.

Graham took a bite of grape pie, his gaze never leaving Trina’s face. How he loved to watch her dark eyes sparkle and her animated face beam with pride in her accomplishments. “That’s good to get ahead. So the typing is going better?”

At the mention of typing, her cheery expression turned sour. “Oh, I hate it! My fingers are so clumsy. It takes forever.” She sighed then straightened her shoulders and tipped up her chin. “But I’ll get better the more I do it. Beth got me a tutorial that shows me the right way to put my hands on the keys so I’m not pecking around like this.” With a laugh, she demonstrated by jabbing her pointer fingers against the tabletop in a wild dance. She laced her fingers together and shrugged. “She says I’ll enjoy typing more when I’m not having to stare at the keys and poke them.”

Graham winked. “I’m sure you can do whatever you set your mind to. But doesn’t the tutorial eat up your study time?”

Once more, Trina crinkled her face into a scowl. “Yes. It hasn’t put me behind because I’ve had the whole day to commit to studies since classes started, but when Monday comes and I go back to work. . .” She sent him a mournful look. “How will I fit everything in, Graham?”

“Well. . .” He scratched his chin. “Don’t work full-time.”

“I have to!” She leaned forward, her palms flat on the table. “I thought I had a lot in savings, but college is very expensive. I didn’t get any scholarships, partly because I enrolled so late but mostly because all I had was the GED, and my score wasn’t very good. I don’t know how I’ll pay to finish if I don’t work full-time.”

Graham put down his fork and slid the dessert plate to the edge of the table. He placed his hands over hers. “Do you think you might be able to get a scholarship next year?”

Trina shrugged, turning her hands to twine her fingers with his. He sensed she wasn’t even aware of the action, but it had a serious affect on his heart rate. “Maybe. . .if I get really good grades in all my classes. But according to what I read online, most scholarships are for activities like music or sports.” She released a regretful chuckle, shaking her head. “I’ll never get any of those.”

“God will pave the way.” Graham gave her hands a quick squeeze. “If you have to work full-time, then it means you’ll just have to budget your study time wisely.”

She bit down on her lower lip, sending him a repentant look. “But what if it means no evening time with you?” Her face puckered into a pout. “I’ve gotten spoiled the last couple of weeks, seeing you every day. I don’t want to give it up, but—”

“Are you going to the skating tonight?” At the intruding voice, both Trina and Graham jumped, their hands jolting apart. Graham met Kelly Dick’s smiling face. The girl’s gaze bounced back and forth between them. “I get to go—Mom and Dad said I could. Are you going?”

“I don’t know.” Graham looked at Trina. “I had forgotten they scheduled the rink for tonight.”

Trina tipped her face up to Kelly. “Is this your first time to go skating?”

Graham already knew the answer, but Trina’s mother had kept her home so often, he wasn’t surprised Trina didn’t know who regularly attended the skating parties.

Kelly’s eager nod exhibited her enthusiasm. “Yes. They made Kyra wait until she was seventeen, but Mom said I could go if Dad said it was all right, and Dad said it was okay if Mom approved it.” She laughed. “So I’m going a full year earlier than Kyra!”

Graham couldn’t imagine the significance of Kelly’s statement, but by Trina’s laughing eyes, he sensed she understood.

“Well, don’t tell Tony,” Trina said, “because I’m sure Mama and Dad will make him wait until he’s seventeen, just like they did me.”

Kelly teasingly ran her fingers over her closed lips then snatched up their plates and scampered away.

As soon as she left, Graham said, “Well? Do you want to go to the skating party? Especially if our time together is going to be limited when you go back to work, maybe we should have a fun evening together with our friends.”

Trina licked her lips, her eyebrows rising in speculation. “Would you rather do something. . .quiet? Just the two of us?”

Could she possibly know how tempting he found her question? He loved their together time, yet he realized the more time they spent one-on-one, the harder it was to put off their wedding. At times it was tortuous not being able to exhibit the affection his heart longed to release. Although he told himself it was best to wait, he knew it wasn’t going to be easy.

Leaning forward, he grasped her hands again. “Trina, I would love nothing more than to have an entire, uninterrupted evening with you. But you’ve spent all of your free time just with me lately. Wouldn’t you like to have time with your other friends? You must miss them. I know they miss you.”

Her smile turned impish, and she bobbed her head in a firm nod. “It’s hard for me to have time alone with you without wanting more, too.”

He burst out laughing then coughed to cover the sound. “How did you know that’s what I was thinking?”

She shrugged, still grinning. “I just know.”

“Well, you’re right. Being alone with you makes it a lot harder to leave you afterward. I’m starting to think that’s how your uncle Henry managed to wait so long for Marie—he didn’t
see
her every day, which would have let him know exactly what he was missing. So being in a crowd is probably best—for both of us.” He gave her hand a slight tug. “Do you want to go? If so, go check with your mom and make sure it’s okay.”

Without another word, Trina slipped from the booth and disappeared into the kitchen. Moments later she returned, a smile on her face. “Mama says to go. She says I’ve been holed up in my room too much lately and getting out will do me good.” Shaking her head, she stared at him in wide-eyed wonder. “I can’t believe how much Mama has changed.”

Graham agreed Mrs. Muller seemed like a different person than the one who used to watch him with a scowl on her face. Although she still didn’t greet him with huge smiles or cheerful banter, she did acknowledge him with a nod of hello and conversed with him. Most noticeable, however, was her willingness to allow him time with Trina. He wasn’t sure what had precipitated the change, but he was thankful for it.

“Dad’s changed, too.” Trina’s melancholy tone captured Graham’s attention.

“I know.” Graham had witnessed the man’s drawing away from Trina since she started the college classes. He prayed daily for Mr. Muller’s acceptance of Trina’s choice. Although in the past her father had been strict, he’d also been warm. Graham knew how much Trina missed the dad she used to know. “Give him time. He’ll come around.”