Blind Hope: An Unwanted Dog & the Woman She Rescued (3 page)

Many voiceless steps trailed out in the velvety snow behind us. Laurie’s silence spoke to me of her determination to contain her emotions. Finally, my friend’s fragile resolve dissipated like the frozen breath that drifted over her shoulder. I heard a sob and turned to look at her.

Tears had gathered on her lower lashes and shimmered momentarily before sliding down her cheeks. I reached over and placed a gloved hand between Laurie’s shoulders to bridge the small distance between us and peered into her glistening eyes. A single bare finger emerged from layers of long sleeves and gently pressed beneath her nose.

She took a deep breath. “When I rescued my dog, she was a discarded, homely mutt. I will never forget my first thought when I saw her:
She’s a wretched creature … just like me
.”

Next, my friend poured out the story of how she had become the unlikely owner of a most unlikely dog.

No one could have foreseen then the significance of that day, least of all Laurie.

Her dog’s rescue occurred on a blistering afternoon in late August. The day was devoid of the cooling breath that routinely moves across the High Desert. Scorching air hung still and silent, as if creation itself had given up hope and stopped breathing altogether. Even by Central Oregon standards, it was hot, miserably hot. The combination of searing heat and roadside sage produced an aroma so pungent that it could almost be tasted.

The stifling heat didn’t deter Laurie. She was on her way, determined to prove to those around her that she was as kind and generous as anyone else who worked at the ranch. On this special day, she was going to rescue an unwanted dog.

The week before, Laurie had learned through our ranch office of a rescue situation with a horse and several dogs in need of new homes. This information was familiar to a rescue facility, but somehow this situation seemed different to Laurie in a way she couldn’t define. Her residence wasn’t conducive to rescuing a horse, but she could welcome a dog in need. Laurie wasn’t able to shake off her persistent desire to help, and like her ranch co-workers, she decided to extend herself to a dog trapped in hardship.

One hopeful thought led to another. This could be the very thing that would lift her aching soul and carry her toward the shore of lasting contentment. Perpetually stalked by low self-esteem, Laurie clung with fresh hope to this adoption. She anticipated how this noble deed would help her feel better about herself. All she wanted was a hideaway, a reprieve from the relentless guilt of past poor decisions that continued to splinter her soul. Maybe this new horizon of selflessness would finally bring relief. Laurie’s emotions soared with each thought, and she chose to soar with them.

Only days before, she learned the dog that was soon to be hers was an Australian shepherd mix about nine years of age. Laurie imagined a beautiful tricolored Aussie with piercing blue eyes. Further indulging her daydream, the new owner pictured this cool dog as her new sidekick, joining her in every hike, jog, and horseback ride. Her knowledge that Aussies are energetic, intelligent, and social only added to the framework upon which Laurie was building her dream.

Laurie’s expectations multiplied as she traveled the twisting road to where the dog awaited. She envisioned walking with her silky-coated dog through the trendy downtown streets of Bend, Oregon. Dogs and their owners are so welcome in this hip scene that many merchants provide watering bowls outdoors and dispense dog biscuits indoors. Laurie pictured herself
with her stylish dog at her side and smiled in advance approval, knowing the two of them would fit right in.

With her hopes as high as the afternoon’s temperature, Laurie turned her car into the dilapidated yard that matched the given address. In an instant she knew why the call regarding the animals residing here had come to the ranch. The family lived in an old mobile home that was in the obvious process of returning to the crumbling earth beneath it. Everything appeared to be dead: the trees, the grass, and all the scattered, rusting cars.

A lone horse stood motionless near the sagging barbed wire fence that encircled it. Laurie breathed a heavy sigh and reminded herself that the underweight gelding would be moved later in the day to the new adoptive home found for him by the ranch. Goats and chickens, dogs and children, dotted the ramshackle landscape. Laurie’s heart ached for them all.

Laurie made her way up wobbly wooden stairs and knocked lightly on the door, triggering a barrage of barking from within. The door opened a few inches, and a stocky woman peeked out. After brief introductions, the owner ducked back inside and then returned, leading the dog Laurie had promised to adopt. Laurie’s earlier excitement fell like a blazing meteor.

This dog doesn’t look anything like the dog I had imagined!

The dog was almost completely white with a brown patch
over each eye and a single brown spot on her rump. Her coat was a dull, tangled mess. Despite the intense heat, the Aussie’s underbelly, from chin to tail, was shrouded with a three-inch swath of stinking guard hair. The dog was so thin she looked to be half her normal body weight.

Laurie’s heart recoiled.

What? You’ve got to be kidding me! This isn’t the dog for me. She’s not nice looking at all! There has to be some mistake; this can’t be my dog! Why did I say yes to a dog I’d never seen? What was I thinking?

Suddenly Laurie felt too ashamed of her shallow motives to admit out loud that, based solely on how the dog looked, she didn’t want to take her. Yet if she declined to take the dog after seeing her, everyone would know that her loving compassion was only a facade; she would be exposed as a fake. Laurie rubbed her hand across her mouth in an attempt to hide her deepening disappointment. She stifled a moan of frustration, all the while hating herself in the awkward moments of silence.

When the dog saw Laurie appraising her, she lowered her head and began to wag the entire back half of her body in a plea to be accepted. Laurie heard a strained “Hi, baby” drift off
her lips as she knelt down to greet the wiggling dog. The canine’s breath greeted her first—it was horrible! She fought to keep from reeling backward. The owner stood nearby and watched. While the dog licked her entire face, Laurie struggled to control her gag reflex, and her expression matched that of a woman being slapped repeatedly in the head with a giant putrid slug. Laurie pulled away just in time to see the dog’s rotten teeth smiling at her.

This just keeps getting better and better
, she thought, jerking her nose away from the stench that puffed from the dog’s mouth. Standing back up, Laurie could do little more than stare at this homely dog with the ugly coat, bad breath, and nasty teeth.

Attacked by a dual ambush, Laurie fought to suppress the negative emotions inside her heart and the negative thoughts inside her head.

Get a grip! Even though this isn’t the dog I pictured—the dog I wanted—I want even more to do the right thing This dog cannot stay here; she won’t survive. I can take her home and help her stabilize by regaining the weight she has lost. If I must, I can find a suitable home for her then. I simply cannot leave her here—not now, not after seeing her plight. Today—right now—she needs my help. And I’m not leaving without her!

Laurie squared her shoulders and looked over at the owner. “I’ll take her.”

Her “yes” to the dog was also a “yes” to herself. She purposed to fulfill her promise and become a woman of her word. Within moments, Laurie retreated over the worn road that had led her to the tumble-down homestead. But she wasn’t alone on the return trip—a smelly, scraggly dog was now by her side.

L
aurie smiled as she recalled the first encounter with her dog that scorching summer day. We were still enjoying our walk, and the sparse flakes that had fluttered down around us earlier must have summoned their friends. The snow began falling in earnest. All sight and sound drew inward around us in a muffled veil of unspoiled silence. Laurie’s eyelashes provided the perfect resting place for a few playful snowflakes.

“Look at this!” I held my palms skyward. Every flake that landed on my black knit gloves was a crystalline masterpiece. “Check out this one. Oh, look at this tiny baby on my finger!” The falling artistry offered a welcome respite, allowing Laurie to catch her breath.

Using her nickname, I asked my friend the obvious question. “So, tell me, Lou, you said earlier that your new dog was a wretched creature like you. What did you mean by that?”

Laurie took a deep breath and exhaled a groaning, wordless response that I recognized as the universal sound of “You don’t want to know!”

“That good, huh?” My stifled laugh invited her to share more. “It’s my dog,” she said. “I could hide from everyone—but her.” Laurie’s blue eyes were pensive.

“Explain.” With a single word, I pushed the door open for Laurie to release what was straining inside her heart.

In a voice I almost couldn’t hear, more to herself, she said, “I didn’t expect this—any of this.”