Blissful Vol. 1 (3 page)

It’s quiet. None of us speak. There’s an
awkward tension between us, which is probably my fault because I’m
so damn attracted to him. Not sure if it’s ever going to be the
other way around with good-looking guys like him. Most men don’t
even glance at me when I walk past the street. Oh what the hell, I
shouldn’t even be thinking about this. I’ve got no chance with him.
He’s probably got a girl at home waiting for him.

“So, where were you heading?” he asks all of
the sudden.

I’m caught off guard by his sudden question
and have to think twice to remember the answer.

“
I uh …” Not sure if I want to tell him.
I’d rather forget about everything that happened, and I’m not
really up to sharing my entire history with someone I just met.
Besides, I don’t want him to see me cry, and I know I will if I do
talk. “Nowhere in particular,” I say.

He snorts. “Yeah, I guess you’re not getting
anywhere with that busted baby.”

Somehow the word ‘baby’ is repeated over and
over in my head, as if it’s the nickname he made up for me instead
of my damn car.

“
Lucky I passed by to help you out.
Couldn’t actually miss it either, with your honking. What were you
trying to do? Hoping someone would hear the damsel in
distress?”

My jaw drops
, and I let out a half-baked laugh. “What? I
was
not
doing
that.”

“Sure looked like it to me.”

I roll my eyes. “I was … resting my head.”
Shit, why do I have to say something so stupid?

Jack laughs.
“No wonder you were gaping at me. You were just
tired, that’s all.”

My pupils dilate
, and I can feel the heat rush to my cheeks. “No.
Can we please stop this?”

He looks my way and then gives me a poke
in the arm. I’m shoved to the side by that one finger, and it
hur
ts a little. Geez,
he’s strong.

“
Cheer up. I’m just messing with you,” he
taunts.

I sigh and stare out the window. “I’ve had
my fair share of that, thank you very much.” I don’t think I can do
this. It’s obvious. I should’ve seen this from the very start. Me,
the fat girl, falling for the handsome rancher. Of course it’s just
my imagination. He’s only fooling with me. Is he even going to help
me get my car back into working? Or is he just making it even
worse?

“
I have a nice fluffy pillow in the back if
you want.
You can use
that to rest your head instead of a steering wheel.”

Damn … his jokes are infuriating. I shake
my head. Just thinking about it makes me angry. I should’ve known
all men are the same. None of them can make me happy or not feel
miserable for once in my life. All they do is make fun of
me.

I breathe loudly through my nose, trying
to blow off some steam.
“Can you please stop the car?”

Jack looks at me and
raises his eyebrows. “Huh?
Why?”

“Because I’m not going with you. Stop the
car.”

“
What?” he says. “Oh, c’mon. I was only
teasing you a little.
Nothing harmful.”

I fold my arms and continue to stare out
the window.
I don’t want
to look at him. I don’t want to see the look in his face, the look
I see in every one of their faces.
That
look. Pity. As if I’m worth less than other girls, just
because I’m fat. I’m sick and tired of it. I just want to get away
from everyone and leave. Jesus, why did my car have to die on
me?

“Hey, I can’t fix your car out here. There’s
no other option,” he says, defeated. “Amy, you should really come
with me.”

“
Why? A minute ago you threatened to leave
me here and bri
ng my car
here in the morning.”

“
Because it can get quite dangerous out
here at night. I don’t wan
t anyone on my land this late.”

I frown and break the promise to myself
that I wouldn’t look at him. “Your land? You mean to say you own
this
whole place? All
this is yours?” I point at the grass.

He nods. “I’
m a rancher. Trust me; you don’t want to be alone
here when the sun sets completely. There are animals out there that
could seriously hurt you. I don’t want to see that happening.” He
clears his throat and focuses on the road again.

I take a deep breath and sigh, releasing the
built-up stress inside me. Shivering, I pull my arms close together
and rub myself.

Jack glances at me and then starts fiddling
with the radiator. “Sorry, didn’t realize it wasn’t on. I’m usually
too worked up to feel the cold.” He laughs a bit.

“
Yeah, I can see that,” I say. “Must be
hard work. Always
rescuing
damsels
in distress.” I make quotation marks with my fingers.

He looks at
me with half a smile on his face and nods. “Yeah,
okay. I deserved that.” He jerks the steering wheel to make a turn.
“Well, at least let me fix your car, all right? There’s no one else
nearby to do it, and the nearest shop is hours away. I’ll have it
fixed in no time, and you can be on your way again.”

I sigh. “Fine.”

“
Hey … I know I’m being a jerk, but I
really mean it when I say I’ll help you out.”

“
So?” I turn my head
, and he looks at me with a dirty smile
that brings that fluttery feeling back into my stomach.

“Think you could be a little thankful?”

“Yeah. Thanks.” I snort and shake my head. “
And thanks for making fun of me. Men …”

His eyebrows rise. “Hey, I wasn’t trying
to make you feel bad. It just looked too cute to pass up
on.”

His smile makes me laugh.

“
Besides, it made you forget about whatever
was bothering you before, didn’t it?” he says.

The smile fades from my face. His words pull
me back into reality. Make me remember that I was driving away from
my failed wedding. From Ronnie. I don’t want to think about it.

Tears sting my eyes, and I can feel the ache
in my chest. My vision becomes blurry and all I see is the darkness
covering my eyes. I feel abandoned and alone. The pain is sucking
me into a black hole again.

Suddenly I feel a hand on my shoulder. I
turn
my head and see
him, Jack, staring at me. He’s carefully nudging me, as if he’s
trying to wake me. Was I asleep? No, I can’t have been. I don’t
feel like I’ve been sleeping. I’m still tired, but I wasn’t out. I
was in my own head, drowning in my own sadness.

“
Hey, Amy? Are you sure you’re okay?” Jack
says. His voice sounds like it’s far away, but he’s right beside
me.

My lip is quivering, trying to move, but I’m
unable to speak. I feel like a brick wall, frozen in time.

“
Hey, snap out of it,” he says.

He shakes me
, and I focus on his eyes. Those beautiful dark
eyes that are hiding behind those thick lashes. Inside there’s a
story untold. It’s holding onto me. I cling to it, trying to
remember that I’m still alive and breathing. It’s the only thing
keeping me from curling up like a ball and turning into myself for
eternity.

I look around and notice his hands on me.
They’re warm and comforting, leaning on my shoulder, keeping me
grounded. The car is stopped. I can hear the crickets buzzing in
the grass around us. Only the car lights illuminate the road
ahead.

Only now do I remember to breathe.
Breathe, Amy, breathe, I tell myself.
I close my eyes and take in oxygen like a
vacuum.

“Amy, say something,” Jack says, his voice
wavering.

“I’m okay …” I mumble. No, I’m not okay.
Physically, maybe, but I’m trying not to die inside.

“
Jesus …
I thought you were having some epileptic episode
or something,” Jack says. “You scared me there.” He falls back into
his seat.

“No …” I mutter. “I’m just …” the words hang
in my throat. I can’t get them out. I don’t want to tell him how I
feel. I can’t tell anyone how I feel. If I do, it means it’s
real.

He sighs and just looks at me, his head
turned to the side.
“Something to do with why you’re out here?”

I nod, but keep my eyes on the radiator. I
don’t want to look him in the eye, afraid I might spill everything.
I don’t want to cry anymore.
I can’t. If I do, I might break and fall apart. That can’t
happen in the middle of nowhere with a man I just met.

“
Hey …” He places his hand on my shoulder
again, and the warmth springs me back to life. “You don’t have to
tell me. It’s okay. I’m sorry if I said anything that made you
upset. I didn’t know there was something …” He doesn’t finish his
sentence. It’s silent for a few seconds. “Let this stranger help
you out, okay? Get you something to drink and get your car fixed.
It’s the least I can do.”

I swallow away the tears and
smile at him. “Thanks. I
appreciate it.”

He smiles. “
All right.”

Jack opens the door and steps out of the
car. Frowning, I look around. I thought we still had to drive, why
is he getting out?
It’s
already dark outside, but I clearly see one light burning up ahead.
Then I see the house attached to the light, a few yards away. It’s
a large wooden home, looking like it could use a fresh coat of
paint. Next to it is a huge barn, and tools are lying all over the
place. We’re already here?

“
You gettin’ out or
do you want to camp out in my car?” he
says, leaning over to look at me through the window.

He walks
toward the house. I hurry out and slam the door a
little too hard maybe, because he turns his head to me. I walk to
my own car and haul out the enormous suitcase I brought.

“
Wow, you brought a suitcase that big? You
must be serious on camping out here.”

“Oh, damn you and your jokes,” I say, and he
chuckles, amused at my troubles. Yeah, you go ahead and laugh.
After you’re done with my car, I’m out of here …

Walking back to the house is difficult.
The ground beneath me is soggy, and my shoes sink into the mud. I
tiptoe to a spot where there are some tiles.

Gazing at me, he laughs and shakes his
head.
“Afraid of a
little dirt?”

“I’m a girl and I’m from the city. What do
you expect?” I say with my brows furrowed.

“
Nothing, actually.” Leaning against the
open door of the house, he just stands there and looks at
me.

I gape at him. Did he just actually
say
that? “Excuse me?
Are you implying something?”

He smirks. “Well you said it yourself,
you’re a girl from the city. Not much to expect when it comes to
farm life.”

He’s just provoking me!
Well, I can take him. “Yeah, well I think
I can handle a little muck.” I snort.

I jump across a
pile of mud, but lose my balance on the slippery
ground. My butt lands exactly in the puddle.

Jack bursts out into
laughter
, and it makes
me furious. My outfit is ruined and now my hands, legs and butt are
covered in wet sand and God knows what else is on this ground. Jack
strides toward me and holds out his hand. “Does Your Highness want
a hand?”

Squinting, I’m pondering whether to jerk
his legs so he drops
,
too, but I bet I’m not strong enough to make it happen. Plus, it’s
rather rude, since he wants to help me. Sighing loudly, I take his
hand and let him pull me up. My shoe is caught in the mud, and I
stumble forward, right into his chest.

His broad arms are around me, keeping me
from falling again. I look up to meet his surprised eyes. My heart
makes a jump, feeling his body so close to mine. Oh, shit, this is
so wrong.

I twist away from his arms and lean
backward to get on
my
feet again. Clearing my throat, I try to make the burning feeling
in my throat go away.

Jack
purses his lips and frowns, looking confused. For an
instance it almost looks as if he’s affected by our touch,
too.

Then he turns back into his playful self
again. “
Can’t even stand
on your own two feet, huh.”

He wipes his muddy hands on his
jeans,
as if it’s no big
deal to make them dirty.

I roll my eyes. “Give me a break.
It’s dark outside, I can’t see
a thing, and the road here is like a sinkhole.”

Jack laughs.
“Can’t argue with you on that. Well, better get
you cleaned up.” He grabs my suitcase, turns around and hauls it to
the door, expecting me to follow him, I guess.

I walk after him and take a look at his
house. It’s quite dark inside, with only a few old lights
illuminating the living room. There’s a scraggy couch and
an old television standing in
the corner. On the floor is a red carpet that looks like it hasn’t
been cleaned in ages. Jack leaves my suitcase in the living room
.He turns into the kitchen, which is on the other side of the
house. The sink is filled with leftovers and dishes, and the table
is covered in food smudges.

I wince, while Jack seems oblivious to the
fact that his house looks like a mess. I would never invite someone
into my house if it looked like that, but I guess he doesn’t
care.