Authors: Jamie Manning
“Don’t rush it, Erik. You need to take time to grieve.” I sounded so ridiculous and fake giving him what felt like empty, flaccid advice.
“I need to live, that’s what I need to do.” He stopped walking and scooped my hand into his. I knew it was wrong—that I should’ve pulled away—but I liked it, liked the way his touch made me feel. “Will you help me with that, Ava?” He lifted my hand to his chest, placing it over his beating heart. “Will you help bring this thing back to life?”
I had to choke back the lump—and the nerves—climbing my throat. His heart thump thump thumped beneath my hand, vibrant and strong and enticing. Thoughts of his blood flowing into my mouth filled my mind, and I closed my eyes to force them away. “It’s alive, Erik. It always has been. You always have been. You’ve just forgotten, that’s all.” He lowered my hand, but still gripped it snugly in his. “But it’s okay that you’ve forgotten. It’s normal.”
“What’s normal?” he asked, drawing us closer to each other. “Are you normal, Ava? Am I?” His fingers caressed mine, his eyes locked on my face. “Is the way I feel right now, in this moment, normal?” He moved even closer to me, my slowly dwindling resolve the only thing small enough to fit in the tiny space between us.
Though I tried, I couldn’t stop the words. “How do you feel right now?” My voice was barely a whisper, my mind becoming lost in his words, his voice, him.
“Like I want to kiss you.”
And he did.
Well, he started to. But Kayla suddenly discovered her knack for horrible timing and burst through the large doors of the building in front of us. Erik flashed his crooked grin again, and slowly let my hand slip from his. We stared at each other for a moment before he turned to Kayla.
“What’s up?” he asked her. “Find anything?” I turned to her, too, though all I wanted to do was grab Erik and run behind the nearest building and make out. Ugh, what was wrong with me?
“The lady said my dad never showed.” Kayla clutched tightly at a small envelope, spinning it over and over in her hands. I was just able to make out her name scribbled across the front. “She said he was supposed to be giving one of his lectures, but never made it.”
“So where did he go? What happened?” Erik asked.
“That’s what I need to find out. I need to know why he left home but never made it here. I need to know what he was working on. He obviously found out something they didn’t want him to know.”
“‘They’ being…?”
“Vampires.” I could see her mind spinning with doubt and confusion and, most prominent, worry.
“I thought you said he did vampire lectures all the time?” My words came out shaky and soft. Erik’s touch got to me more than I realized. “Didn’t he just recycle what he said at each one?”
“Sort of. But he was always doing research, you know? Studying vampire mythology and history. He would tweak his speeches to fit in the new stuff he learned. Who knows what he was working on before he disappeared.” Kayla stepped past Erik and me and headed back toward the car. As I fell in behind her, Erik slid up beside me and took hold of my hand. Though it felt good, and right, I quickly pulled away from him. When I looked over, he was smiling again. I wanted to punch him. And kiss him. Ugh.
“So what now?” I asked, trying to ignore the heat coming from him.
“I guess we go home,” Kayla said, her words dripping with sadness.
“What about that?” I pointed to the envelope she was mindlessly tapping against her fingers.
“Oh. Yeah.” She stopped walking, staring down at the envelope. “The lady said it was left for me.”
“By your dad?” Erik’s words were lifted by the wind, making his voice sound soft and even better than usual.
“I don’t know. That’s all she said.”
“Well open it.” I was way more anxious than Kayla to see what note he—or someone—had left behind.
Kayla pulled her eyes from the envelope and dropped them on me, scanning my face for approval. I smiled and nodded, hoping to prod her to go ahead. I mean, it was an envelope. Left at a university. Couldn’t be that bad.
“Oh my God.” Kayla’s hands dropped to her sides after she read the note, her face stark white with fear. Her eyes frantically scanned the university campus, tears threatening to spill down her cheeks.
“What?” I asked, stepping next to her. “What is it?” She wouldn’t look at me. She spun back and forth, eyeing the students milling around. “Kayla!” I finally got her to stop long enough for me to snag the letter from her hand. She didn’t resist as I brought it up and read it aloud.
“Stop or your father dies.”
“Wow.” Erik had stepped up beside me and was reading over my shoulder. “This has to be a joke. Ow!”
I removed my elbow from his gut. “Hey stupid, say anything mean lately?”
“What the hell was that for?” He pretend-rubbed his gut, and my mind conjured an image of his abs.
Stop it, Ava. Focus.
“Don’t joke about this.” I tried to whisper so Kayla wouldn’t hear me, though judging by the distant look of shock on her face, I could have screamed it and she wouldn’t have noticed. “It’s her dad, duh.”
“Sorry.” Erik halted his ab-rubbing and glanced over at Kayla. Sunlight caught in his eyes, making them sparkle. Geez, what was wrong with me? My best friend had just gotten a letter threatening her dad’s life, and I couldn’t stop drooling over Erik.
“I have to find him.” Kayla’s voice pulled my mind back to reality. She kept staring off into nothing, but determination filled her words.
“We will, Kayla. I promise we will.” I tried to hand the note back to her, but she didn’t move. I reluctantly tucked it into my back pocket.
“Now. I have to find him now.” She turned around and began walking back to the archeology building, and I had to sidestep Erik’s muscular frame to stop her.
“Kayla, wait,” I said, clutching her arm. “We need to regroup.”
Finally she looked at me. “There’s no time. They have him. They’re gonna kill him if I don’t stop them.”
“Drop all this ‘I’ stuff, Kayla. We are gonna help find your dad. Erik and I aren’t going anywhere.”
“Nope.” Erik slid in beside me, and I was glad for the support. I was overwhelmed with the idea of Kayla’s dad being out there somewhere, in danger, so it was nice to know I had him to lean on.
“Let’s just go home where we can regroup and focus on finding him. We don’t have any of your research with us. We don’t have anything.” I regretted not snagging the mound of papers from Kayla’s desk and tossing them into the suitcase with us when we left.
“I appreciate it, guys, really I do. But I don’t wanna waste any more time.”
“It’s not wasting,” Erik said. “It’s strategizing. We need to be smart about this, not just run in fighting.”
“Exactly.” I couldn’t help but think about that night in the woods, when everything changed. We had planned that one out, too, and it turned out so very wrong, so differently from what we had hoped for. I prayed the search for Mr. Harper wouldn’t end as tragically. I glanced at Erik and smiled. “Let’s make a plan and work from that.”
Kayla stared at us before resignation spread over her features. “Fine,” she finally said, turning back in the direction of the parking area. “We’ll go home. But I’m not stopping. I mean it. I’m finding my dad.”
“And we’ll be right here with you.” I stepped up to my friend and placed an arm around her shoulders. “I promise, Kayla. We’ll find him.” I had said it over and over, so it had to be true, right?
“I guess you guys are right,” Kayla said as we headed back to the car. Her voice was a bit calmer than before, but her blood was speeding through her veins like wildfire. “I need to dig through my dad’s files, try to find out what he was working on before he went missing. Hopefully I can find something to help me track him down.”
“Help us track him down.” Erik opened the passenger door. “We’re here for you, K, remember that.” Hearing ‘K’ reminded me of Lila—Erik used to call her L. At the time, I thought it was weird. But now, after all that had happened, it was endearing.
“Thanks,” Kayla said. “I appreciate you both for offering to help me out.”
“Anytime. You know that.” I smiled at her, hoping that she hadn’t noticed the odd-but-awesome tension between Erik and me. Apparently, my mind was consumed with him. I couldn’t stop thinking about him and the whatever-it-was we’d just had a few minutes ago...and what it meant. Was I starting to fall for him? Had I already? I needed to get a grip. “You’re my best friend, Kayla. I’m not gonna leave you alone through this.”
“You’re my best friend, too, A.” What was it with initials? “You know that, right?”
“Of course I do.”
“And you know I love you, right?”
I knew something bad was coming, I could hear it in her voice. But the words “I love you” superseded the ominous feeling in my stomach, and I fell into the trap anyway. “I love you, too.”
“Good,” she said, opening the door of the Volvo. “Then you won’t get pissed when I say that you two”—she paused long enough to point back and forth to Erik and me across the roof of her car—“need to stop whatever it is you’re doing before all three of you end up hurt.”
S
ECOND CHANCE
A
s we drove back to Wellesley in silence, Kayla’s words kept running through my mind: before all three of you end up hurt. She was right. There was obviously something between Erik and me—what, I didn’t know—and if I didn’t do something now, Chance would end up suffering for it. I had done enough to him already; the last thing he needed was more pain. When we pulled into Erik’s apartment complex, I hopped out and walked with him to his door.
“We can’t do this,” I said as he unlocked his apartment. “It’s wrong.”
He rolled his suitcase into the entryway and turned to face me. “What’s wrong? How I feel? How I know you feel?”
“You don’t know how I feel, Erik.” My voice was shaky.
“I don’t?” He stepped toward me, his hand running up my arm to my shoulder. Even through the fabric of my shirt, his touch was electric.
“No.” I swallowed. “You don’t.” I stared up at him, refusing to look away, to give him the satisfaction of being right. I mean, he knew he was, but I wasn’t going to let him know that I knew he was.
“Okay,” he finally said, his hand dropping from my arm.
I kept my eyes locked on his. “Good. So no more of whatever this is, right?”
“Whatever you say, Ava. You’re in charge here.” That crooked, sexy grin showed up again, this time with something wicked lurking behind it.
“Then it’s over. I mean it, Erik. I love Chance.”
“But,” he said, his voice low and deep in his chest. He paused and smiled wide at me, the corners of his mouth curling up toward his bright eyes. He leaned down and to the left, his lips only millimeters from my ear. When he spoke again, his words were an almost seductive whisper. “I think you might love me, too.” A simple kiss on the cheek that left me flushed, and he was back to his old self. “Tell Kayla thanks for the trip. You guys drive safe.” And then he was gone, his sweet scent and the warmth of his lips on my cheek left behind.
I think I may have been in shock on the drive across town to Kayla’s. I didn’t answer any of her questions in the car, ignored those same questions as we poured through her dad’s files, and even tried to dodge them as we got ready for bed. But Kayla wouldn’t back down, so I finally had to face her.
“Okay,” she said, sitting up in her bed. My bed was across the room—a small twin frame that Mrs. Harper was kind enough to dig out of the attic and set up for me. “What the hell is going on between you two?” I didn’t sit up, but I could see her shadowy silhouette in the moonlight spilling through the bedroom window, her eyes almost glowing. Though we had called it quits for the night, her bed was buried beneath papers. “Don’t think that you’re gonna ignore me, Ava. I’ll keep you up all night singing bad show tunes if I have to.” And she would. The cheesy musicals she made me watch once a week were bad enough, but her voice doing the singing? Torture.
“Fine with me. I don’t really need sleep anyway.” That wasn’t entirely true. Being half vampire meant I could go without sleep much longer than a full human, but it didn’t mean I liked it. And after the day I’d had—road trip to Boston, heated tension with Erik, cryptic threatening letter—I was exhausted.
“Okay.” She killed the flashlight she had been using to scour more files and flipped on the lamp beside her bed. “You want some West Side Story or Grease? Those are my favorites, but I’m open to other suggestions.” I wished then that I knew the most obscure, unheard-of musicals, just so I could get her to shut up. But the only ones I could recall were those she had forced me to endure. So it was either sit through her ear-piercing rendition of “You’re The One That I Want,” or spill the beans. Some choice.
“Fine.” I gave up the fight and sat up in my bed. “What do you want to know?”
“Like I haven’t been asking you the same question all night.”
“Okay, okay.” Deep breath. “I don’t know what to tell you. I don’t know what’s going on between Erik and me. Honest.”
“No clue, huh? All the touchy feely kissy kissy, and you have no idea?”
“Well, I know what’s happening, I just don’t know why.” And that was the truth. I had no clue how things between Erik and me got to the point of intimate touches and whispered words. A month ago, when we were fighting side-by-side against Sebastian and his coven, Erik and I had barely said five words to each other. Now, things were different. “Maybe it’s that whole ‘connected by a trauma’ thing?”
“Um, huh?”
“You know, they say that when people go through a traumatic event, they tend to gravitate toward each other or something like that.”
“So of all the things you’ve forgotten about your past, that’s what your brain remembers?”
“No,” I said, rolling my eyes at Kayla’s attempt at humor. “I saw it on some talk show.” I didn’t feel the need to tell her that I was sort of lying. I had seen it on a talk show; it just happened to be before the whole buried alive thing.
“Whatevs,” she said, using her hand to exaggerate her disdain. “Truth time.” She stared long and hard at me, so long that I almost asked if she had forgotten how to speak. No such luck on that one. “Do you like him?” Her knees were drawn up to her chin, her hands clasped around her bare legs.