Blood Memory: The Complete Season One (Books 1-5) (50 page)

“I jumped off this cliff, unable to live with what I did, the man I was. And I would do it again. I’m a coward.”

“You’re not a coward. You’ve saved our lives a dozen times the past week.”

“They say that in those moments – when it’s life or death, and you have to make a choice between saving those you love, or saving yourself – those are the moments that define the type of person you are. No psychologist could ever tell you what you would do –
really
do – in that situation. It was the moment when they really needed me – and I let them down. I betrayed the people I should have been most concerned about.” He turned away from her. “You get close to me, you end up dead.”

Anne wrapped herself around him, their bodies close. She felt him relax in her embrace. “You were scared. People do strange things when they’re scared. The old Jordan died down there,” she said, pointing to the sea.

“You’re wrong. I’ve done things that would make you take Jessie and leave me.”

“What things?”

Jordan took a deep breath. “Do you remember the day Joel died? The day he was found?”

“Yes.”

Jordan shut his eyes. “I could have saved him. I could have saved him, but I didn’t. The same night I returned, he came back too. He was injured, dripping blood and limping. He came to the door with a pack of Lurchers on his tail. I could have fought them, attacked the Lurchers. But instead Joel turned and went into the next room, saving us, but sentencing himself to a gruesome death. And I just sat there, doing nothing as they ripped his body apart while he was still alive. Now tell me I’m not a coward.”

Anne was silent.

“You see? How can you stay with me?”

“Jordan…” Anne said.
She couldn’t look at him. “I knew.”

Jordan look
ed at her. “You knew? What did you know?”

“There aren’t many Lurchers who use knives, Jordan. I saw the puncture wound in his
eye. You gave him a quick death.”

“But why didn’t you say anything?”

“Because I believed in you. I believed you did what you thought was best for all of us. Letting someone you love die to save your family is not something a coward would do.”

“You’re not angry?”

“You did what any of us should have done – if we were strong enough. If it had been me instead of you, I would have let them in. And we would have died – all of us.”

Jordan’s shoulders relaxed. “You know the saddest thing about all this? I’m still no closer to knowing what Queenie is really after. I was hoping it would be obvious, but it could be anything. I remember everything
now, but I still don’t know what he would want with me. They’ll never stop, you know. Not so long as they can use my blood.”

Anne pulled him closer. “Then we’ll have to run far away so they’ll never catch us, won’t we?” She leaned forward and kissed him on the lips, soft, gentle, then finding him unresponsive, pulled away. “I’m sorry.”

Jordan put his hand to her cheek. He leaned forward and kissed her – hard, hungry. Anne’s hands explored his body. His narrow waist, his broad shoulders, and he explored hers. He reached up under her T-shirt, gently brushing her skin with his fingertips. She took off her top, and helped him take off his, never stopping their kissing. Jordan leaned on top of her, pecking her skin, face, neck, shoulders, their bodies illuminated in the silver light of the moon.

Jordan woke from a deep dreamless slumber. There had been no sign of the nightmare. He gently removed Anne’s arm from his chest and set it aside. She rolled over onto her other side, away from him. He got to his feet, body numb and unresponsive like it wasn’t his. He gently kissed Anne and Jessie on the forehead and crept out of the room.

He stepped out onto the porch, careful when closing the door. He looked back at the house for the final time. It stood as a monument to his failure, his cowardice. As he crossed the beach, he heard soft footfalls behind him. A diminutive figure emerged from the darkness.

“Jess. What are you doing out here?”

“I could ask you the same question,” she said, chin poking up in the air.

“Go back inside, Jess. You’ll catch a cold.”

“Where are you going?”

“I’m… going to catch something for breakfast. Something hot for a change. Just go back inside and sleep, okay?”

Jessie’s eyes dropped to the rucksack in Jordan’s hand. He moved to block it from view. “You’re leaving us, aren’t
you?”

“Jess…”

“But why? Don’t you like us?”

“No, no, no,” Jordan said,
putting down the bag. “I love you. You know that, right?”

Jess nodded, wiping a tear off her cheek.

“So long as you’re with me, you’re not safe. One day you will understand.”

“I don’t want to understa
nd! I want you to come with us. We’re almost back to the boat. We’ll be there today, Anne said. Let’s get to the boat and get away from here together. They’ll never catch us.”

“They will catch us eventually, Jess. Maybe not at first, but one day. You have to be brave, okay? Take care of Anne for me.”

Jessie folded her arms and puffed out her cheeks. “No.”

“Jess, believe me, this is as hard for me as it is for you. You have to let me go.”

Jessie hugged him tight. He felt his chest grow damp with tears. He lifted her chin with his finger.

“Keep your chin up. I left directions of how to get to the
cat on the kitchen table.”

Jordan picked up the bag
and walked away. He daren’t risk looking over his shoulder. He heard quick footsteps behind him, but before he could turn, Jessie had wrapped herself around his leg like one of Frank’s traps.

“You can’t go! You can’t leave us! I won’t let you!”

“Jessie.” He tried to pull her off. He’d have better luck with a limpet. “Let go.”

“No. If you go, you’ll have to take me with you.”

“You make a beautiful anklet, Jess, but I can’t take you.”

“Then you can’t go. Mary, Selena, Stan… They’re all gone. We’re all that’s left. You can’t leave us now – not when we’re so close to the end.
Please!”

“
Jess-”

“
In the Old World…” Jessie began. She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. “In the Old World… I was an orphan. You never knew that about me, did you? It’s true. Do you know what it’s like to have people come look at you and decide they don’t want you? Decide they don’t want you in their family? I do. It happened to me all the time. I never thought I would have a family, but now, in the New World, I do. I have one. Please don’t leave me. Please. Let us stay together. We’re a family.” She burst into tears, weeping into Jordan’s leg. “We’re a family.”

Jordan stood staring at Jessie for a moment, her words
hitting hard. Then he smiled and shook his head. “You certainly have a way with words, Jess. Do you know that?”

“So you’ll come back?”

“If you’ll have me.”

Her embrace grew tighter
.

Anne woke to find herself alone. The blankets beside her had been tossed open like an alien had woken from its cocoon. Jessie’s bed was similarly empty. Panic fluttered in her stomach. She hastily dressed and rushed into the kitchen, where Jessie sat eating cereal with no milk.

“Have you seen Jordan?” she asked.

“He’s in the bathroom having a wash.”

Anne found an empty bowl and poured herself some of the cereal. On the table was a handwritten note in Jordan’s hand.

“What’s this?” Anne said, picking it up.

Jessie’s ey
es went wide, spoon frozen halfway to her mouth. “It’s nothing,” she said. “Just… a few notes Jordan made in case we forget how to get back to the boat.”

“Huh. Unusually organised for him.”

Jordan entered the kitchen, water dripping from his hair. “‘For him’, who?”

Anne proffered the note. “For you.”

“Oh, that. You never know, I forgot all this stuff before, maybe I’ll forget it all again.” He winked at Jessie. “Did you sleep well?” he asked Anne, a mischievous sparkle in his eye.

Anne blushed. “Not bad. I’ve had better.”

“You have, huh?” Jordan smiled. They held one another’s gaze.

Jessie looked between them. “You two look at each other like Stan and Mary
used to.”

Jordan and Anne burst out laughing.

Jessie frowned. “What?”

Anne rested a hand on Jessie’s shoulder. “I’ll tell you when you’re older.”

Jordan laid a bunch of wild flowers at the front door. They stood there a moment in respectful reflection. Then they got on their bikes.

Jessie complained about how sore her bum was from cycling the day before. They rode up the winding path that led to the top of the hill. Jordan stopped and looked down at the house one last time. It sat there, lonely against the sand, against the ocean, against the world. They peddled away.

The quays were clogged with the upturned carcasses of a hundred ferries, yachts and cruise liners. The wind rustled the limp flags of a dozen forgotten nations. A single ship shone in the early morning sunlight like a beacon of hope. It was a seventy-foot twin-hulled catamaran. It bobbed on the sea’s surface, the hull making deep thunking noises as it made contact with the quay.

The sight of the cat swelled Jordan, Anne and Jessie
’s hearts. It was more than a boat. It was their ticket to a better, safer life. Less heart-swelling were the Lurchers arrayed on her deck.

“Maybe they’ll leave,” Anne said.

“Sure,” Jordan said. “I’ll invite them over for tea and you can explain the situation to them. They’ll be gone in no time.” Jordan looked closer at the Lurchers. They stood in place, feet jittering on the spot, jaws opening and closing like they were chewing cud. “It looks like they’ve been ordered to stay put and keep watch.”

“How can you tell?”
Anne looked out at them again, their arms hanging low at their sides, bodies in a constant state of movement.

“Look how they’re organised. One at each corner, two in the centre. Then at regular intervals along the quay. They’re not moving
any time soon.”

“Maybe we could d
istract them away from the cat and then make a break for it? We would only need a minute.”

“We don’t know if there are any Lurchers on board. Even if we did manage to cast off, we might have to fight them. If they overpower
ed us…”

“There might not be any on board,” Anne countered.

“Do you want to take that risk?”

Anne shook her head. “
No. But it’s there. It’s right there. After everything we’ve been through, we’re just going to give up now?”

“
Of course we’re not going to give up. We just need to be patient.”

“So what do we do now then?” Jessie
said.

J
ordan’s eyes moved to the side. “If we had some help taking them out, we could do it.”

Jessie frowned. “Where are we going to find help?”

“One place comes to mind.” Anne smiled. “Burgh Castle compound.”

“
Do you think they’ll help us?”

“
I don’t know,” Jordan said. “But somebody has to.”

Jordan, Anne and Jessie negotiated their way through streets festooned with rubble, broken glass and the scattered contents of shops that ran along either side of the street. The road became thick with vehicles, their doors torn open, cargo stolen. Panicked drivers had driven up on the pavements and left their cars at right-angles, blocking the road.

Anne pulled up next to Jessie.
“Do you remember any of this?”

“
Yes,” Jessie said, looking at their surroundings. “This is where the Lurchers chased us. We were with Sergeant Marsh and Corporals Nasser and Baxter. I was aware of everything, but I couldn’t speak or hardly move. I suppose that’s what a Lurcher must feel like.”

“
Yes, but Lurchers don’t feel anything. There’s nothing left of the original people.”

“
Maybe there is but we just don’t know it. Maybe they’re lost in there somewhere looking for a way out like I was.”

Vehicles were parked bumper to bumper. Tight alleys wound between them like the cuffs on a convict
’s wrists. They peered around each vehicle before moving forward.

“
We’re almost there,” Jordan said, nodding toward a series of shop fronts.

Anne looked up. She could make out the ramparts of the compound behind the stores, like a monster looming over its dominion. Even at their current speed they would be there within the hour. Anne grinned. She could barely sit still.