Blood Moon (42 page)

Even though I wasn’t in the living room to
see the exact spot where David drew his last breath, just being in
this house caused anxiety to claw at my chest, curling its gnarled
fingers so tightly around my lungs, I found it hard to breathe. I
couldn’t bear to stay here for any prolonged period of time, so I
quickly stripped out of my rumpled dress, tossed it in my hamper,
and found a pair of jeans and a gray long-sleeved cotton tee. I
grabbed another duffle bag and threw more clothes inside of it
before slinging it over my shoulder. When I exited my room, I was
surprised to find Nick had wandered to the living room. He looked
around, not touching anything, and I hesitantly stepped
forward.

“Wh-what are you doing?” I asked, my eyes
instantly finding the spot where David bled out. It had been
cleaned up, but the hardwood was stained from his blood. It had
seeped into the wood grain, and I could still smell it beneath the
lingering scent of all the cleaning chemicals used. Amongst the
stains were scratches from my claws as I’d fought Samantha. I
briefly wondered what the police report might read regarding them.
Perhaps the suspect had a dog with him.

“Just trying to see if there’s anything else
we can use to track down where their nest might be,” Nick replied,
scanning the room from his position. “Can you tell me a little more
about what happened? Maybe the one that was here left behind some
kind of clue about where they’ve been holing up?”

Again, I hesitated, but I told him.
Everything. I told him how I came home from his place, ready to
apologize and tell David I wanted more out of our relationship. I
explained how David wasn’t home, and I found this woman—a woman I
thought to be dead given I was assigned her case and had been over
her autopsy report multiple times—snooping around before she
attacked me. It embarrassed me when I told him how I fought back
poorly, and then my anger spiked when I got to the part where David
walked in.

Nick continued to listen as I told him how
she threw David through the air like he weighed no more than a
pillow, and when I got to the part where I shifted, he seemed
particularly intrigued. “And you remember? The shift, I mean?”

I nodded. “Most of it, yeah. It’s still a
little hazy, and I was definitely in and out of consciousness. Is
it…” I cringed, remembering the way my bones shifted beneath my
skin and the rippling and tearing sensation of my fevered skin.
“…always that painful?”

“In the beginning,” Nick replied, seeming to
ponder the question for a moment. “The pain lessens over time.” He
shrugged, looking contemplative. “Or maybe we just grow used to it.
I guess it’s hard to really tell.” Glancing down at my duffle bag,
he added, “You ready?”

“Yeah. I think so.”

“Okay.” We walked toward the door, but
before I could reach for the knob, he opened it for me. A small
smile of appreciation formed on my lips as I whispered my thanks,
and we were on our way.

My car had remained in my driveway since
David parked it there after our dinner with my folks, and I balked
before opening the driver’s door, remembering that David was the
last one to sit in this seat. And the last thing we did before he
died was fight. That would eat at me forever.

It wasn’t until I felt a hand on my back and
heard Nick’s soft voice that I snapped out of it.

“Brooke?”

Shaking my head, I tossed my bag in the
backseat. “Sorry. I got lost in thought.”

“You wanna talk about it?”

“Not really,” I muttered, nodding toward the
passenger side. “Get in.”

Complying, Nick rounded the front of the car
and opened the passenger door. Once we were both belted in, he
turned his head to me. “So, did you want to drop your things at
your parents’ house?”

Shrugging, I put the car into gear and
pulled out of the drive. “Nah. I’ll give them a call and let them
know I’ll be over later tonight.”

“You know,” Nick said gently. “You could
always just stay with me and the Pack.” Glancing over, I found him
staring at me hopefully. “Obviously, you’d take my bed and I could
continue to camp on the floor…or I could even take the couch to
offer you more privacy.” There was a brief pause, and I sensed his
slight discomfort. “I just think it might be easier if I’m going to
teach you how to track and hunt…not to mention how to shift.”

I contemplated his offer, knowing that it
would probably be easier—for a number of reasons, not just the
obvious werewolf-in-training parts. For one thing, Nick and the
guys were less likely to bring David up at every turn, whereas my
parents would want to talk about it as a way to overcome the grief.
I didn’t want to talk about it. Not right now, anyway. All I wanted
to focus on was catching the bitch responsible for this whole mess
and teaching her a lesson.

So, while it might have made sense to stay
with Nick, I honestly didn’t know what I would tell my parents.
This meant I would have to resort to sneaking out or coming home
late. It would be like being a teenager again. On the plus side, I
should be able to pass off any strange behavior as grief.

“Thanks for the offer,” I began. “Really.
But I think it might be best if I stay with them a little longer.
I’ll probably find myself in a hotel in a few days if I find I need
the privacy, but I’ll keep you informed.”

“Brooke,” Nick interjected. “If you find
yourself looking for privacy from your parents, don’t waste money
on a hotel. My door is always open to you.”

I promised to consider his offer seriously
before he instructed me to head just outside the city. In such a
heavily populated area, it would be hard for us to find the privacy
we needed to talk about everything that was going on while teaching
me the tools I would need to master my new abilities.

We drove out to Apache Trail. It was late
enough in the year that there wouldn’t be too many people out
hiking the trails, and we’d be sure to keep off them enough to stay
out of sight. As we drove, Nick explained that he and his Pack
frequently hunted here. It should have been weird to me that he
didn’t just shop at the grocery store to eat some of his meals, but
I actually understood it—craved it, even. The thought of running
carefree through the trails, weaving around cacti, bursting through
a bush, or leaping over other obstacles or desert terrain sounded
exhilarating. But when I added in the possibility of a rabbit or
some other kind of prey, I found myself salivating and desperate
for that release of adrenaline.

Two hours had gone by, and I wasn’t growing
any closer to figuring any of it out. The only thing that seemed to
be increasing was my irritation level. I was in the middle of the
desert, stark naked and barely hidden by a bougainvillea bush. My
entire body trembled, beads of sweat covered every inch of my skin,
and my breathing was deep and ragged after having failed again.

Initially, I worried about stripping down in
front of Nick, but then acknowledged the upside: my clothes would
remain in one piece so I could walk out of here after all of this
and not look like I’d been mauled by a wild animal or physically
assaulted. Besides, it wasn’t like Nick had never seen me naked,
and what did I have to be embarrassed about? It helped that he was
a gentleman and turned around while I disrobed.

Never mind the fact that there was
absolutely nothing sexy about this entire situation. Thankfully,
Nick didn’t ogle; his eyes always remained on mine to keep me from
getting uncomfortable.

“This isn’t working,” I growled,
frustrated.

Nick went over the steps once more: relax,
clear your mind, and let your instincts take over.

Seemed simple enough, but the problem lay in
the fact that trying to change your entire anatomy put a lot of
stress on the body. It was all I could think about, and my
instincts were to get dressed and call it a day. Nick informed me
that I’d almost done it a couple of times, but I couldn’t recall
what I did differently, having given into the pain and blocked it
out briefly.

“You need to focus,” Nick reminded me over
and over again, sounding slightly frustrated. “Stay alert and
accept
the wolf. Don’t deny it access to your body and
mind.”

“I am,” I barked angrily. “I’m not
ready.”

“Yes,” he interjected. “You are. You shifted
days ago—without the full moon. You can do it again. You just have
to
believe
you can.”

Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath and
tried again. I visualized the changes my body would go through, and
while they weren’t particularly pleasant, I forced my way through
it. But imagining it didn’t make it real. Everything stayed the
same, with the exception of the monstrous headache I now
sported.

“I
can’t
,” I repeated, my emotions
quickly morphing from frustration to anger and disappointment.

“You can.”

I know he was trying to be supportive, but I
wanted to punch him in the face. Really fucking hard.

Seeing my growing ire for his irritating
positivity, he smirked. “Okay, maybe we should try this another
way. Instead of trying to bring the wolf out unnecessarily, what if
we tried to trigger it?”

“Trigger it?” I asked. “How, exactly?”

“By recreating how you feel when you’re
around one of
them
,” he explained.

My stomach clenched and turned, and my blood
burned through my veins. I knew this feeling. I recognized it, and
like Nick recommended, I embraced it instead of ignoring it.

Unfortunately, that was as far as it
went.

Before I could admit defeat again, though,
Nick reached into his pocket and threw something at me. It startled
me at first when it hit me in the face, and as I pulled it away, I
inhaled deeply. Flames ignited, licking the walls of my veins and
setting my lungs on fire as the memory of the smell slammed into
me.

The smell of death and rot burned my
insides, the subtle hint of jasmine doing very little to mask it.
My skin itched and tingled as heat emanated from my pores, and my
body trembled. I identified the feeling, and I knew I was supposed
to accept what was happening, but my previous inclination to push
it down took over.

“Don’t fight it,” Nick said, taking a
satisfied step back, folding his arms across his chest.

I shook my head, though I wasn’t sure if it
was to push away my acceptance or my denial. My vision darkened,
and the beast clawed its way to the surface, unrelenting and
unwilling to let me suppress it.

My muscles tensed, my flesh burned and
tightened like it was two sizes too small for my body. The urge to
let go arose—just like it did last time. I prepared to refuse it
again, but I looked up, meeting Nick’s gaze, and I focused.

“It’s amazing, isn’t it?” he asked, his
voice low and gravelly. “Feeling your body become stronger.”

His words affected me physically as well as
mentally, and I reveled in how powerful I felt. In an effort to
help the process along, I thought about how my bone structure would
change, forcing me onto all fours instead of my more natural
upright posture. I imagined the way my organs would have to shift
in my new body, how my teeth would elongate, and the hair that
would sprout all over my body—that last one was the most disturbing
to me considering how much time and energy went into hair removal.
Then the imagery recoiled like a spring, snapping back almost
painfully.

Instead of going back to
feeling…
normal
…I was dizzy and out of sorts, unable to
concentrate on anything. My eyes failed to see much of anything,
and I fell to my knees. The pain didn’t stop, though, and my mind
started to retreat.

“Don’t fight it, Brooke,” Nick encouraged,
dropping to his knees right in front of me, having rushed over to
help me through this. He was blurry at first, but soon he came into
focus, and my breathing increased along with my heart rate. “It’s
incredible—unlike anything you’ve ever experienced before.” I
glanced down at his hands as he leaned forward and curled his
fingers into the dirt. “Feel the dirt beneath your feet. Revel in
the way the air runs through your hair as you dash through the
woods, hunting with your pack at your side.”

The tightness in my muscles intensified, and
my skin quivered and crawled. A rumble built in my chest, the sound
increasing with every passing second. Then the pain took over. My
body experienced the equivalent of being engulfed in flames and
then ripped apart as my bones shifted and cracked beneath my
fevered skin. I clenched my eyes shut tightly, digging my fingers
so far into the earth that the cool, moist clay embedded itself
under my nails. The low growl that had been building in my chest
escaped in the form of a painful scream that echoed through the
desert, forcing the birds from their homes and the smaller animals
to scurry from their hiding places among us.