Blood Red Road (26 page)

I point at Jack. If anythin happens to her, I says, I’ll know who to blame.

He grabs my hand. His eyes is hard as stone, cold as a gray winter sky. His hand’s warm. His skin’s rough. A tingle runs up my arm. You don’t fool me, he says.

Is that right?

Yeah, he says. I see it in yer eyes. All you care about’s yer precious brother.

That ain’t true, I says.

If it’d bin Emmi they took, he says, Emmi an not Lugh … would you of gone after her?

I take in a breath to say of course I would but the look on his face stops me. There ain’t no point in lyin when he already knows the truth.

He leaves go of me an steps back. I thought so, he says. Yer sister’ll be safer with me than she could ever be with you. You jest ride along on yer high horse an leave her to me.

Gimme yer hand. Maev says it in a low voice, so’s nobody else can hear. She slips a gold ring onto the middle finger of my right hand. If you ever need me, she says, if you need the Hawks, send Nero with this an we’ll come. Wherever, whenever … you send this ring an we’ll be there.

She steps back.

My heart swells in my chest. From Hermes’ back, I look down. She smiles at me.

You got us outta Hopetown, I says. Saved our lives. You gave us clothes an food an horses … the chance to find Lugh. I … we owe you so much, I don’t see how I can ever repay you, but once we—

Friends don’t owe, she says. Friends don’t repay. Go well. I hope you find yer brother.

G’bye! Emmi leans down an hugs Epona around the neck.

You do what Saba an Jack tell you, says Epona.

Keep ’em safe, Jack, says Maev. If you don’t, we’ll hunt you to the ends of the earth. An when we find you, we’ll rip out yer guts an feed ’em to the jackals while you watch.

I’ll bear that in mind, says Jack.

Nero circles above. He caws, impatient to git goin. I look up. Time to go, I says. I click my tongue at Hermes an we start to move out. Jack leadin the way on Ajax, Emmi in the
middle on a pony called Joy, an me bringin up the rear, with our packs an saddlebags an waterskins filled thanks to the Free Hawks.

They’re all gathered to see us off. Now they start shoutin. G’bye, good luck, don’t ferget about us, see you soon, an all that kinda thing.

I take one last look. At Ash, Epona an the rest, smilin an wavin.

But not Maev. Not smilin. Not wavin. Jest standin there.

Lookin like she don’t especk to ever see us agin.

W
E BIN TRAVELIN ALL DAY
. I
HAFTA GIVE IT TO
J
ACK, HE
sets a good pace. Fast enough fer my hands not to git itchy on the reins but not so fast that Emmi cain’t keep up on her pony.

Jack says we’re still in the foothills of the Black Mountains. Says we won’t reach the mountains proper fer a couple of days yet. We climb steadily, windin our way through forests of evergreens an across dry open valleys covered with scrub.

Nero’s pleased to have me back after being apart fer so long while we was in Hopetown. I feel the same. Mainly he’s happy to jest ride on my shoulder, makin conversation an remarkin on the scenery as we go along. From time to time he’ll disappear fer a bit on some crow business.

He’s bin missin since mid-afternoon an I’m jest startin to wonder where he’s got to when he appears outta nowhere. But instead of comin to me, he flutters down to land on Jack’s head. Then he leans over an starts to nibble lovinly on his ear.

I cain’t believe my eyes.

Nero! I yell. Leave Jack alone!

He shoots over to me so fast he’s jest a blur. Lands on my shoulder an hunches there, not lookin at me. I never knew a crow could look guilty, but he does all right.

Jack looks back an smiles. Don’t call him off on my account, he says.

Bloody Jack. What is it with him? What is it about him that he seems to charm everybody an everythin that crosses his path? Ash an pretty well every other Free Hawk, my sister an now my damn crow. I swear, if there was a rock in his path that he couldn’t be bothered steppin over, all he’d hafta do was give it one look an it’d roll outta the way.

Not me though. I don’t roll outta the way fer nobody. Not even him. Especially not fer him.

As dusk starts to fall, we sets up camp in a stand of pine beside a little trickle of a creek. The layers of dead needles feel soft an springy unner my feet. The sharp sweetness of warm pine fills the air.

Jack closes his eyes an takes in a deep breath.

We’ll have sweet-smellin beds tonight, Emmi, he says.

I’m gonna make ’em real good, Jack, she says. You see if I don’t.

I collect wood an git a fire goin while Jack sorts out the rest of our gear. Emmi bustles around, unloadin the bedrolls from the horses an settin ’em out beside each other. She
chats away to herself an I let it roll over me, like usual.

I’ll sleep here, she says. An Jack’ll be … here … an then Saba can go … here. Right between me an Jack.

My head shoots up. What? I says. Oh no! I go over an grab my bedroll. You go in between Jack an me. That ’ud be better, don’t you think? That way, uh … you can talk to both of us. How about that?

But Jack put me in charge! Emmi puts her hands on her hips. He unloads the horses, you do the fire an I set out the bedrolls! Ain’t that right, Jack?

I thought it was, says Jack. But I guess yer sister don’t think yer up to the job, Emmi.

They both look at me. Emmi’s got her face all scrinched tight. She does that when she’s upset an tryin not to let her chin wobble. Jack’s face is blank, like he don’t give a hoot one way or th’other. I don’t trust him fer a second. He knows I don’t wanna lie next to him, but I cain’t tell Em that. As far as she’s concerned, I’m jest bein mean to her like usual an not givin her a chance. He’s got me this time.

That ain’t true, I says. I hand my bedroll back to Em. Sorry, Em. Of course it’s yer job. I’ll leave it to you.

While she’s busy puttin her arrangements to rights agin, I go over to where Jack’s unloadin Ajax an Hermes.

I know what yer up to, I says. An it ain’t gonna work.

Is that right? He don’t look at me, but keeps on pilin the saddlebags an other gear. Fer future reference, he says, I’d be
grateful if you’d tell me what it is I’m supposed to be up to that ain’t gonna work. That way I won’t bother gittin up to it agin.

I frown. There you go agin, doin that eel thing, I says. What yer up to, Jack, is … is tryin to make me look like a fool all the time!

Oh, is that what I’m up to?

You know damn well it is!

Then I apologize, he says. Most sincerely.

He smiles. A pleasant smile. Not cocky or arrogant. I dunno what to make of it.

Well …, I says, all right then. Jest mind you don’t do it agin.

I promise, he says, the next time you look like a fool, it’ll be all yer own doin. He winks at me as he picks up the saddlebags. Fire needs tendin, he says.

I stand there fer a moment. He jest got me agin, the bastard.

But I feel a little smile sneak over my face.

Night, Saba, says Emmi. Night, Jack.

She rolls over onto her side, facin away from me, an soon she’s fast to sleep. Nero’s set on his roost in a tree nearby.

I stare at the night sky. It’s high an light an clouds scud
across the face of the moon. I clutch my blanket around me tight, lie stiff as a board. I’m so aware of Jack lyin next to me. The warmth of him, the sound of his breathin, the slight rise an fall of his chest I can see outta the corner of my eye.

There’s a rustle as he moves. I look an he’s facin me, propped up on one elbow. The dyin fire catches on his cheekbones, shadows his eyes. My stummick jumps. Shivers. I look away.

He reaches out an touches the heartstone, lyin in the hollow of my neck. Draws his hand away quick.

It’s hot, he says.

I know, I says. I pull it over my head an shove it down in my bedroll. Stupid thing, I says. Dunno why I wear it.

After a bit he says, Tell me about yer brother.

We’re twins, I says.

Ah, he says. I figgered he must be somethin special fer you to go through so much to find him. What’s he like?

I think. It’s always the same when somebody asks me about Lugh. Mercy, Helen, Maev … even Emmi. I wanna talk about him an at the same time I don’t. I feel like, if I do talk about him I’m givin away little bits of him that I wanna keep to myself.

Our ma died birthin Emmi, I says. An after that, Pa … well, he warn’t ever the same. He didn’t seem to care about nuthin no more. Not us or … not anythin … not really. If it hadn’t of bin fer Lugh keepin food on the table an a roof over our heads, I believe we would of all died. Lugh an me was only
nine year when Ma died, same as Emmi is now. So he ain’t afeared of takin things on. Never has bin.

But what’s he like? says Jack.

He’s … well, he’s funny, I says, an kind an … he’s real smart. I guess he paid attention to what Pa told him. Not like me. He knows … everythin. He can fix anythin, he knows the land an creatures an … me. He’s th’only person in the world who really knows me.

DeMalo. Dark eyes, almost black, meet mine
.

Lookin deep inside of me. Findin my darkest thoughts, my worst fears
.

He sounds too good to be true, says Jack.

His voice seems to come from a long ways away.

What’d you say? I says.

I said … that Lugh sounds too good to be true.

You got no right to say that. You don’t know nuthin about him.

I says it real quick, to block out the thought of how Lugh’s bin changin over the past year or so. How he was that last day. How he said he couldn’t wait to leave Silverlake an the look on his face when he called Pa a foolish old man livin in a dream world. I hate that Pa died with them bein the last words spoke between ’em.

Hey, says Jack, I’m sorry, it was a stupid thing to say. I’m sorry. So, if yer twins he must look the same as you?

I turn on my side to face him.

No, I says. He’s beautiful. Like Ma was. Gold hair like the sun. Long, in a braid right down to his waist.

Yer hair’s startin to grow back, he says. It’s dark.

Black, I says. Like my pa’s. It used to be nice. Thick an long an … I must look real stupid.

No, he says.

When Ma was alive, she used to say, yer the night-time, Saba, Lugh’s the day. I’m the one who always takes things too serious. Lugh’s the one who smiles, makes you laugh. He’s a good person, Lugh. He’s everythin I ain’t.

Is that what you believe? That you ain’t a good person? That you ain’t beautiful?

I don’t say nuthin.

You must miss him, he says.

I never knew that missin somebody could hurt, I says. But it does. Deep inside. Like it’s in my bones. We ain’t never bin apart till now. Never. I dunno how to be without him. It’s like … I ain’t nuthin.

Don’t say that, he says. Don’t ever say that. You are somethin, Saba. Somethin good an strong an true. With him or without him.

He reaches over an brushes my tears away with his thumb. I didn’t even know I was cryin. A warm path trails behind his touch.

The clouds clear fer a moment an I dive into his strange silvery eyes. They’re like a moonlit lake. We lie there fer a good
long time, jest starin at each other in the soft, piney night. At last he says, We’ll find him. I promise. Now try an git some sleep. I’ll take first watch.