Blown Away (14 page)

The parking lot at Sneaky Steve's was full. Several women spilled out of the front door, holding each other up as they laughed and staggered toward a car. Friday night was apparently in full swing.

I'd thought my night would be in full swing right about now, too, but I'd somehow managed to leave Drew in my camper, telling her I had to run out but would be back soon.

Not soon enough. I was on fire for her after our day together. I wanted to move fast and get back to her as soon as possible.

As soon as I walked in, I saw Brandi delivering drinks to a table near the door. I approached and waited until she was done.

“Hey,” I said in greeting.

“Hi again.”

“Have you got a minute to talk? It won't take long.”

She looked around at the tables and then back at me. “Yeah, I've got a minute. We can go outside.”

We left the blaring jukebox behind and stood on the sidewalk outside the bar. Brandi looked at me expectantly, her serving tray tucked under her arm.

“So I know this is gonna seem strange, but I was here with Colby last year. The last time you saw him.”

She furrowed her brow. “I'm sorry about his fiancée getting upset. I didn't know. I didn't mean to start anything.”

“Yeah, I know.” I took off my hat, ran a hand through my hair, and put it back on. “So, that time we were here…the last time…you and Colby left for, like, ten minutes. Can I ask what you did?”

“What we
did
?”

“I need to know for my own peace of mind. I know Colby was flirting with you. He'd flirted with other women, too, and I told him once that he needed to act like a guy with a fiancée at home instead of a hormonal frat boy. But after that I never brought it up again.”

“And now his fiancée…she's upset because she thinks there was something going on with me and him?”

“Well, it looks bad. And if you tell me you gave him a blow job in the back room, I'm
not
telling her. I just need to know for myself. I'm wondering if I should've said more to him than I did.”

Brandi sighed deeply. “You know what? He wanted to see my tattoo. I'd just gotten it a couple days earlier. It's between my hip and my hoo-ha because I'm in nursing school and I'm not allowed to have visible tats. I took him into the kitchen and showed it to him.”

“The kitchen?”

“Yep. My boyfriend was a Marine who died in combat overseas so I had his name tattooed. Jonathan. Colby said he wanted to get a tat that said ‘lush' and he asked to see my letters.”

I closed my eyes and looked at the ground.

“Fuck. Brandi, I'm sorry. About Jonathan, and for assuming something I shouldn't have.”

“It's okay. I get it a lot. You know, bleached blond hair, big boobs…and I'm kinda a flirt myself.” She paused for a second. “You know, my brother Scott works in the kitchen here. Colby wanted to see his ink, too. We got them at the same time. Scott's back there now. Let's go see him for a sec.”

I shook my head. “That's okay. I believe you, Brandi.”

“I know you do,” she said, grinning as she opened the bar's front door again. “That's why I'm offering.”

I followed her through the bar and then down the hallway Colby had returned from last year. I felt like an asshole when I saw that the only doors led to the bathrooms and the kitchen.

The kitchen was staffed with a handful of people. Two were washing dishes, one was cooking, and another was watching a baseball game on a small TV on the wall.

“Scott,” Brandi said to the guy watching the game. He turned to us. “You remember a year ago when I brought a guy back here? Tall, average build, dark hair.”

Scott scrunched his face in thought. “I think so. Why?”

“You remember why I brought him in?”

“We showed him our tats. Dipshit said he was getting one that said ‘lush.' ”

Brandi smacked him on the cheek before I even knew it was happening. “Shut your face, asshole. He's dead now.”

“Oh. Sorry.”

She gave me a smug look that said,
See? Told you so
.

“Thanks, man,” I said to Scott, clapping him on the shoulder.

Brandi walked me back to the front door.

“Tell your friend he was a good guy,” she said, leaning in to talk in my ear over the music. “I offered to show him more than the tattoo but he turned me down. I didn't know he was engaged, but now it makes sense.”

I nodded, relief setting in.

“Thanks, Brandi,” I said, meeting her eyes.

She leaned in again. “Now what about you? I don't see a ring on your finger.”

I smiled and shook my head. “If I wasn't seeing someone, I'd take you up on it.”

“It's her, isn't it? His fiancée? I saw the way you looked at her and ran after her when she was upset.”

“Yeah, it's her.”

“Lucky girl.”

“I'm feelin' pretty damn lucky myself,” I said, opening the door. “Take care.”

When I got back to the campground, Drew was standing at the stove in the camper.

“Just in time,” she said, smiling. “I made us omelets and toast.”

“Smells great. I'm starving.”

She made us each a plate and carried them to the table, sliding mine in front of me as I sat down. Other than Colby, she was the only person who'd ever eaten in here with me. Memories of him were wound into so much of our lives. Would it ever feel like me and her instead of me, her and his ghost?

“I went back to Sneaky Steve's and saw Brandi,” I said, needing to tell her before I started eating.

She furrowed her brow and responded with uncertainty. “Okay.”

“I asked her about that night last year, when I saw Colby go somewhere with her.”

Drew paled and stared into her plate. “You didn't have to do that.”

“Yeah, I know. But when I saw how much it hurt you…I wanted to know. I needed to know. Like you said, you'd be married to him right now if the accident hadn't happened. And he was my best friend. I didn't want to wonder what kind of guy he really was anymore when I could find out for sure.”

She nodded solemnly.

“Nothing happened, Drew. She took him into the kitchen and showed him her tattoo.”

Her face reddened and she rolled her eyes. “That sounds like code.”

“No, her brother was there, too. He said the same thing she did and I talked to them back-to-back and separate from each other. Fuck if I know why, but he told 'em he was gonna get the word ‘lush' tattooed on himself. I mean…it sounds fucked up, I know…”

I stopped. Drew's hand covered her mouth, and she squeezed her eyes shut, fighting the emotion that was overtaking her.

“Hey,” I said, reaching for her hand. “What is it?”

She squeezed my hand and opened her eyes, tears falling to her cheeks.

“It's true,” she said, her voice breaking with emotion. “What she said is the truth. No one but me or him would have known that.”

“That he was a lush? And sometimes a dumbass?”

She smiled at me. “Apparently he was. But ‘lush' is something he used to text me when he was away. It meant ‘love u, sweetheart.' ”

“Oh.”

She stood and walked over to me, wrapping her arms around my neck, her body relaxing against mine.

“I didn't think I needed to know. But hearing that…it's a relief. It's not okay that he flirted and grabbed and checked out tattoos in kitchens, but…this means the last woman he made love to was me. And that does comfort me.”

I nodded, my chest tight. The truth was painfully clear. Colby would always be the man she'd dreamed of marrying. The one she lost. Her great love. I was just the guy who dulled her pain with sex.

She pulled away and smiled gratefully. “Okay, I'll let you eat.”

“Actually, I'm not all that hungry.”

A flicker of something passed over her face. “I'm only hungry for one thing, and it's not an omelet.”

She licked her lips and my cock hardened.

“Is that right?” I said in a low tone.

“You said you'd do your worst,” she said, her cheeks turning pink. “So do it.”

Tonight I wouldn't just be dulling her pain with sex, but mine, too.

“Get up,” I said, leaning back against the island with my hands.

Drew shot up, looking at me expectantly.

“Take your shirt off,” I said. “Bra, too.”

She pulled the shirt over her head, dropped it to the floor, and then unhooked her bra and did the same with it.

Her tits were so fucking gorgeous. I rubbed my hand over my cock as my eyes roved her hard, pink nipples.

“Undo my pants,” I ordered.

She dropped to her knees, looking up at me with pure lust in her eyes. I'd never seen anything hotter.

“Do what I told you,” I said, my arousal making the words come out harsher than I'd intended.

She reached for my fly, unbuttoned, unzipped, and pulled out my hard cock.

“You want to suck me?” I stroked a hand over my cock and she licked her lips.
Fuck.

“Yes.”

“Better suck me good,” I said, gripping the island counter as I forced myself not to let her see how worked up I really was. “Or you go to bed with an aching pussy.”

She worked her lips up and down my shaft, giving me a wet, slow blow job. I clenched my muscles, trying not to let the sight of my cock in her mouth do me in.

When she sped up and put a hand on my balls, I groaned deeply. The sight of her pretty red nails stroking my ball sac was just too damn much. And the feel of it…Christ, it was heaven.

“Get up,” I said.

She pulled back on my cock and stood up. I moved her so she was standing in front of the island, and then I reached around and undid her jean shorts, sliding them off with her pale pink panties.

The first hard smack on her ass made her jump with surprise. I wasn't sure she liked it, but then she pushed her ass back toward me in a silent plea for more.

She leaned over and gripped the counter of the island, her back arched as I spanked her perfect round ass.

“You like that,” I said, sliding my other hand between her legs. “Fuck yeah, you like that
a lot
. You're so goddamn wet.”

Without warning, I thrust myself into her and grabbed her hips. I wouldn't be slow and tender this time. What she'd said about Colby had me feeling anything but tender.

She cried out as I pounded her, but I could tell this was both pleasure
and
pain for her. I was relentless, taking out my bitter feelings with every hard stroke.

“Aiden,” she said, her voice a whimper. “Don't stop, I'm coming.”

She moaned and cried out my name. I gripped her hips tighter and thrust myself balls deep, unloading inside her with a hard shudder.

Laying her upper body on the island, she breathed hard for a few seconds before letting out a deep, sexy laugh.

“Aiden, you're definitely not all talk.”

I looked at the bright red marks on her ass and hips. I'd gone hard on her. She'd be feeling it tomorrow. And wasn't it just my luck that she thought my punishment sex was more like a reward.

One way or another, this woman was going to be the fucking end of me.

I chanced a glance at Aiden, hoping his jaw wasn't still set in the same tense line.

It was.

Usually the silence between us was comfortable, but today it was filled with tension. And the worst part was not even knowing why.

“It has to be about impossible to get the probes into the tornado every time,” I said. “The way it moved…I don't think anyone could've hit that mark.”

He grunted his acknowledgment, still staring out the windshield. I considered taking off my shirt to see if
that
would get his attention.

“You know what I like?” I traced a fingertip on his thigh.

“Hmm?”

“I like it when you kiss me slow and sweet sometimes.”

This time his grunt was skeptical. “There's nothing sweet about me, Drew.”

“That's not true.”

He reached for the dial on the radio and turned it up a little. I turned it back down.

“What's gotten into you?” I asked. “Everything was going so well until you went and saw Brandi. Do you wish Colby had cheated on me?”

“Christ, Drew.” He glared at me. “Why the fuck would you think that?”

“I'm just asking. What's going on?”

His brows shot up. “Nothing's going on. This is just how I am. If you don't want to fuck anymore for our last two weeks here, no hard feelings.”

I recoiled, feeling a physical ache in my stomach. “Our last two weeks? You don't want to see me anymore after this trip?”

“I'm traveling for the next three months. I've got classes to teach and a climb to lead. After that I'll be busy with the cabin.”

“Too busy for me,” I said bitterly.

He shrugged. “We hooked up. It's been good. But I'm not boyfriend material. I told you before I ever touched you that I'm the opposite of Colby. The thought of marriage gives me the shakes.”

“Why are you being such an asshole?”

“Just being honest.”

“So you think I want another man like Colby? Who paws other women?”

“He was more than just that. He was sweet and sappy and delirious about the thought of settling down with you.”

I scoffed. “Yeah, because he knew he'd still be feeling up other women on the side.”

“No matter what we do, everything between us will always come back to him. I can't keep my best friend's fiancée on my list of no-strings girls. You don't want that, anyway.”

“Do you actually have a list?”

“In my phone, yeah. I'm about sex and nothing else, Drew.”

I shook my head. “I don't know what to say.”

“You don't need to say anything.”

I folded my arms protectively around myself. “Thanks for making me feel like a whore. That's all I want to say.”

Something flashed across his face, but he pressed his lips together, saying nothing.

I slumped against the truck's passenger door, wishing I'd stopped pursuing Aiden when he told me to. Now I felt hurt and used, which I'd never expected from this thing with him. I hadn't been expecting forever, but I also hadn't thought I was the only one who felt something.

We rode the rest of the way back in silence. I slammed the truck door and went into the motorhome. Aiden wouldn't be getting any more no-strings sex from me.

I had a clear vision of what I
didn't
want, but I was more lost than ever about what I did want. All the time I'd spent on the road on this trip left me feeling like I was searching for something I still hadn't found. It wasn't Aiden. It wasn't any man. I wanted to find something within myself that gave me a purpose. I'd proven I could storm chase, which gave me a sense of pride, but what did that tell me about my future?

So far I'd come up empty-handed in my search for something more. I ate a sandwich and went to bed early, hoping the answers might come to me as I slept.