Blue (32 page)

Something inside of him told him that this wouldn’t end well for anyone. Something told him that the unborn child’s fate had already been decided, and Anytha’s heart would be broken either way. He thought about Delah walking into Inali’s clinic, the one right down the road from her home on the Jacaranda-lined street, and getting the procedure done without telling Anytha. He imagined Anytha sitting next to her mother with her hand on her belly, hoping to feel the movements that would never come. His heart broke. How did Anytha know that she wouldn’t just kill the child and act like she had a miscarriage months later, with the only intention to steal these months away from Anytha that she could have been in his arms?

Ari couldn’t handle the waiting any more. He had to go to Pretoria. Even if he just waited in the parking lot of the abortion clinic for weeks, waiting for Delah to show up and guarding the door. He had to go. Even if nothing came of it, he couldn’t wait here. At least in the parking lot of the clinic, his waiting would mean something. Ari packed an overnight bag, grabbed his keys off the kitchen counter, got into his car, and steered in the direction of Pretoria.

There was something ominous about the clinic now, and Ari couldn’t help but think about how the building looked more run-down than it had just a few months ago. They had only been performing abortions here for a few weeks, but already the place felt different. Ari sat in the parking lot of an abandoned building across the street from the clinic, watching women walk in and out, wondering which ones might have just made a decision that they would regret for the rest of their lives. Women walked in with their husbands and boyfriends in tow, for support in the decision that they were making. Ari noticed that usually, the men would come outside and smoke while the woman was in the clinic. He wondered how many of them might have taken up smoking just to remove themselves from inside the building.

The morning passed, and after the initial rush of about eight women walking into the clinic at 9:00 a.m., there was no one walking in. At noon, he saw three men in white coats and a half-dozen women dressed in scrubs walk out of the clinic. He watched a nurse flip a sign over on the front door that read, “Out to lunch” and lock the door behind the last person out of the building. At 12:30 p.m. all of the nurses and doctors returned, and the sign was flipped over again. At 1:00 p.m. another group of about eight women showed up, many with their partners in tow. Ari got out of the car and walked inside behind a couple of girls.

He sat down in the waiting room as he watched the girls walk up to the front desk and sign their names on a piece of paper, recording the time that they showed up. He realized then that the women were served on a first-come, first-served basis, and the nurses came out and called their names in the same order that they signed up on the sheet. A woman that was noticeably pregnant walked in about fifteen minutes after the initial trove of women who had come in together at 1:00 p.m., and she approached the counter.

“Hi, I was told that sometimes you guys can take walk-ins. I was given a referral here by another women’s clinic,” the woman said.

“Sometimes if we don’t have a full schedule we can take walk-ins, but our schedule is pretty packed up today. I can check the calendar to see when our next available appointment would be, if you would like?” the woman behind the counter told her.

The woman nodded.

“Okay, looks like we could get you in on Monday, in the morning group,” the woman behind the counter said.

“I can’t wait until Monday. I’ll be twenty weeks in two days. I have to get an appointment by tomorrow,” the woman said, desperately. “Is there another clinic that might be able to take me by tomorrow?”

“Well, we’re the only clinic in Pretoria that is fully operational right now. I could check other clinics around the country though. The Johannesburg clinic isn’t usually as booked as we are,” the woman behind the counter said.

Ari stared at the tiny woman’s swollen belly, and she reached down and touched the side of it, as if to stop the feeling of something moving inside. Ari got up and walked out of the room, unable to listen to their conversation anymore.

He walked across the limestone parking lot, then across the street, and got back into his car. The ominous feeling that he had outside, in the parking lot, only increased inside the clinic. The women that had gone inside came out, one by one, until the sky grew dark, and the nurses locked the doors for the night. Ari reclined his seat back a bit and leaned his head against the door, dozing off to sleep.

For two days Ari slept in the parking lot of the clinic, watching the door, unconvinced that Delah wouldn’t have the means to have a doctor come after-hours to do her procedure. He left only after the rush of women in the morning to go get something to eat, and came back for the afternoon rush every day. The third morning, he woke up feeling deflated, wondering how long he might have to keep this up, or when he might come to his senses and realize how stupid he was to be here in the first place. With Delah’s connections to Inali, she could go anywhere she wanted to have the procedure done. It was silly of him to assume that she would come here just because of the convenient location.

Ari sat and watched the morning rush of women walking through the front doors of the clinic, then saw a vehicle pull into the parking lot long after the rest. He saw a small woman with dark hair get out of the car, and he sat up in his seat to get a closer look. He couldn’t believe it, but he was certain that it was Delah.

He got out of the car, not knowing what he would say when he got beside her, but ran to her anyway. He had thought through what he would say many times over the last few days, but for some reason his rehearsal failed him now.

“Delah, wait!” Ari yelled from behind her as she approached the door.

“Oh, you can’t be serious,” Delah said, choking back tears. “Haven’t you done enough to me?”

“What have I done to you? If you can tell me what I’ve done to you, I will apologize,” Ari said, pleading with her and holding his tongue from yelling all the accusatory and defensive things that came to his mind. “Please, I want to make things right. Please. Delah, I love your daughter.”

“Well, I love her too!” Delah said, walking up to Ari and pointing her finger in his face. “How dare you come here to spy on me? You’ve already stolen my daughter away from me, now you want to come here to mock me while I make the most difficult decision of my life?”

“What do you mean, I’ve stolen your daughter away from you? Delah, I’m sorry if I did anything to you in the past, but if anyone stole Anytha away from anyone it was you and your husband. She was happy with me,” Ari said.

“Well, I hope she is happy with you. But I don’t see why you have to come here and rub it in my face,” Delah said, turning around to walk into the clinic.

“Delah, where is she?” Ari asked, realizing that they seemed to both believe Anytha had chosen the other over themselves.

“What do you mean, where is she?” Delah asked, turning back around and walking toward him. “She’s not with you?”

“No, I haven’t seen her in weeks!” Ari said, his eyes widening as his mind raced. “She called me and left a message on my answering machine ten days ago. You and Chester told her you would terminate the baby if she didn’t break up with me, so she had to end it—that’s what she said. Oh God, she hasn’t been with you this whole time?”

“No. Inali said that she came to visit him and told him she had no intentions of speaking with us again. He said that she got into a car with a young boy and left,” Delah said as tears filled her eyes. “Oh, God. Oh, God. Ari, where is she? Was there any chance she could have left with another boy?”

“I doubt it. We have to call the police,” Ari said, running toward the clinic.

“Wait,” Delah said, grabbing him by the arm. “Let me call Inali first. This may all be a misunderstanding.”

“Are you crazy? The last person that allegedly saw your daughter was Inali. And he lied to you! How can you possibly think that you can trust that man?” Ari asked, pushing her hand off of him and running toward the door. Delah started screaming in the parking lot and a security guard from inside the building came running out.

“I’ve known Inali for almost 15 years. I trust him much more than I trust you! Help! Please, this man is attacking me!” Delah yelled, and the security guard grabbed Ari by the arm. Delah ran past them through the front door of the clinic, and asked the woman behind the counter if there was a private place where she could use their telephone.

C h a p t e r 
30

Inali flung open Tabitha’s door as she lay in bed asleep. She screamed and sat up in her bed in a bewildered state. The door hit the wall and slammed back closed.

“Who did it to you?” Inali screamed, pushing her down onto the bed.

Tabitha stuttered, trying to find the words to say.

“Answer me, Tabitha. Who did this to you?” Inali screamed, pulling a knife out of his pocket and holding it up to her neck.

“Dr. Hance!” Tabitha said.

Inali stood up and put the knife away into his pocket, and Tabitha sat back up in the bed.

“Come with me,” Inali said, grabbing her by the arm and dragging her out the door of her room and out the front door of the dorm. He picked her up when they got outside and started running with her over his shoulder, out past the brick wall and into the desert beyond the compound. He picked up the hatch in the ground and carried Tabitha down the stairs into the doctor’s office, through the door that led to the rooms where they had gone through monthly harvest.

“If you so much as move, I promise you, I’ll slit your throat,” Inali said, throwing her down on the patient table in one of the rooms. Tabitha wept on the table as Inali rustled through all the cabinets in the room and pulled a cardboard box out of a drawer.

“I don’t believe it. Take this test. Right here,” Inali said, ripping open the box and unwrapping the white plastic stick and handing it to Tabitha.

Tabitha stood up, and held the pregnancy test in her hand, humiliated and weeping as Inali stared at her.

“Don’t be such a prude,” Inali said, walking over to her and pulling down her shorts.

Tabitha continued to weep as she held the test between her legs and tried to force herself to urinate. A small stream started, and she managed to soak the end of the test.

Inali took the test from her and laid it down flat on the counter.

“Now, since we have a couple of minutes to kill before I either kill you or Dr. Hance, I have someone that I would like for you to meet,” Inali said, walking over to the closet door and unlocking it.

The door opened, and Inali turned on the light. Inside was a young girl with long, dark hair crumpled in the corner, seemingly unconscious.

“Tabitha, this is your sister, Anytha. Anytha, Tabitha. Tabitha, Anytha,” Inali said.

Tabitha stared at the lifeless body of the young girl in the closet. Despite the terror that she was feeling in the moment, she knew that what he said was the truth. They were sisters.

Inali walked over to the counter where he had set down the pregnancy test, looked at it and walked over to Tabitha.

“I knew it was a lie!” Inali said, pushing Tabitha down on the patient table, straddling her and unbuckling his belt. “Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t make it true right now?”

At that moment, Anytha stopped playing dead and popped her eyes open. She stood up and ran across the room, jumping on Inali’s back and wrapping her arms around his neck. She pulled back as hard as she could.

Just then, Tabitha heard a phone ringing from his jacket pocket. She reached for it from below him, pulling it out of his pocket and pressing every button she could before she threw the phone across the room and started screaming.

“HELP! HELP!” Tabitha screamed.

Anytha noticed Tabitha’s cries, and pulling harder on Inali’s throat started yelling, “My name is Anytha Lindewe! I have been kidnapped by Commissioner Inali from the Practice of Blue!”

Inali managed to throw her off of his back and onto the floor, her head hitting the side of the counter on the way down, knocking her out. He pulled the knife out of his pocket, picked up Tabitha, putting the blade to her neck, and dragged her flailing body across the room so he could pick up the phone. Tabitha could hear someone talking to him frantically on the other end.

“Inali! Please, just don’t hurt Anytha,” Tabitha heard the voice of a woman yell from the phone.

“She got wrapped up in the wrong situation,” Inali said.

“Inali, please. We won’t call the police. We won’t press charges. We won’t tell a soul. Just, please, let her go,” the woman said from the other end of the phone.

“I have no intentions of killing Anytha. That would cause too much of a ruckus in the media. A beautiful, young girl murdered. The cops will be all over that. I would be found out for sure,” Inali said.

“Good. That’s good. We just want her home safe,” the woman said.

“No, I never had intentions of killing Anytha, Delah. But Tabitha, that’s a different situation. I could kill her now, and nobody would ever even come looking for her,” Inali said.

“Tabitha?” Delah asked. “Inali, don’t kill anyone. Don’t kill my daughters.”

“Your daughters? So now Tabitha’s your daughter too? So I guess you do care if I slit her throat right now, then?” Inali asked.

“Yes, Inali. I care. I care very much. I never wanted anything bad to happen to her. Please. Just let them go,” the woman said.

“But, I could kill her right now and nobody would even know. Everyone already thinks that she’s dead anyway. So what’s the point of letting her live?” Inali asked.

“Inali, if you let them live, I promise we will not go to the police. We will never speak of any of this ever again,” the woman said. “If you’re looking for a way out of this, take it. Please. Just don’t hurt them.”

“Did you go to your appointment today, Delah?” Inali asked.

“No. I didn’t,” Delah said.

“Oh—well—do you hear that Tabitha? Looks like you will have a little brother or sister back home soon. Mommy, all of a sudden, seems to care for all of her kids again today. It must be your sibling’s lucky day. The day that their mommy decided not to kill them.”